History EverybodyLovesRaymond / TropesQToZ

'''Debra''': [[DeadpanSnarker What a load of crap.]] "The right lady is out there." Well guess what? You're never gonna find her. You know why? Because you don't want to; you're alone because that's what you want.\\

'''Robert:''' [[TheUnfavourite Eeeeeeverybody loves Raymond...]]

--> '''Robert''': Hey, why don't you get one of those big "number one" foam fingers and wave it in the air? 'Cause you're number one, Raymond, YOU'RE NUMBER ONE! But remember this: '''One is the loneliest number that you'll ever do.'''

** Uncle Mel is NOT GAY.

** In the show where Debra's sister Jennifer reveals she is following her vocation to become a nun, Frank and Marie begin an argument, realise they are in the presence of holiness, and bite it back, substituting faked hand-holding and saccharine expressions of blissful devotion that fool nobody. Contrast this to the unhappily married couple in ''Series/FatherTed''. john and Mary hate each other with a passion and are forever fighting and swearing - except in front of the local priests, where they make a suspiciously similar pretence of being happily married. The Barones are Italian-American and practicing Catholics - they would fit in very well in an Italian Craggy Island. (''La Falesia Isola''?)
* In ''The Dog''(1997), Ray the sports reporter is interviewing an ice-dancer in the ladies' locker room. His interview becomes more uneasy as she casually undresses in front of him. Compare this to the scene in ''TheDayToday''(1994) where sports reporter Alan Partridge is trying to interview a sportswoman in the ladies' changing room - and is similarly brought to a stuttering halt as she conducts her side of the interview whilst undressing and changing clothes.

* RantInducingSlight: In "Wallpaper", Marie drives a car through Ray and Debra's house. Debra is understandably upset, but Ray barely reacts to this, frustrating Debra, who wants him to back her up. After the doorway is repaired and the wallpaper replaced, Ray examines the new wallpaper... and loses it, because the stripes aren't the same thickness as the old ones.

* RedOniBlueOni: Ray is the red oni to Debra's blue oni, moreso in the later seasons

--> '''Peter''': (to Pat) If you don't read my ''Zombie Blood Chronicles'', you're not my mother!

* SlowMotion: Seen in the season 4 and 6 openings.

--> '''Robert''': Well you know what? She can love ya all she wants, because ''I'' love ''her'' more than you do.
--> '''Ray''': What?
--> '''Robert''': Ya heard me. I love ma more.
--> '''Ray''': Are you insane?
--> '''Robert''': Deep down inside, Raymond, you know it's true.
--> '''Ray''': Are you saying I don't love my mother?!
--> '''Robert''': Not as much as I do. You take her for granted. But me? I cherish every ounce of affection that woman gives me, because I have to fight for it like a dirty dog in the street. But you? You don't even have to ''try''. She makes it ''so'' easy for you. You're just a fat kid with his mouth open at the end of a chocolate assembly line. (mimes Ray eating chocolate) ''You disgust me''.

--> '''Robert''': Could I get some frozen baby peas, Deb?
--> '''Debra''': You know what, Robert? You get your ''own'' damn peas.
--> '''Robert''': What did I do??
--> '''Debra''': What did you do?!
--> '''Robert''': Hey, look, you're the one who told Amy about Stefania in the first place. You should be apologizing to me.
--> '''Debra''': And what ''you'' should've done is tell Amy the truth about everything, or better yet, not be such a ''pig'' in the first place!
--> '''Robert''': That's the worst apology I've ever gotten.
--> '''Debra''': Why would you get involved with someone else when you already have a relationship? What, does juggling three women at a time make you cool? You know, if that's the only way that you can build your self-esteem, then you are pathetic, and you don't deserve to be with ''anyone''.

--> '''Robert''': Hold it right there, ya little twerp.
--> '''Jerry Musso''': Who are you?
--> '''Robert''': Who am ''I''? I'm someone who can grind you into a fine powder, that's who I am. Now, Ray Barone has more talent in the boil on his neck that won't go away than ''you'' have in your entire body, you oily, two-faced hack. You only ''wish'' you could be Ray Barone, because you'll never come close as a writer, as a father, as a friend, or as a person.

--> '''Debra''': Okay, Robert, listen. Stop feeling so sorry for yourself.
--> '''Robert''': I'm not feeling sorry for myself.
--> '''Debra''': Yes, you are. Spouting off at the family and insulting everybody. You just love playing the victim, don't you?
--> '''Robert''': OK, thank you, Debra. You can go back to being princess fabulosa now.
--> '''Debra''': Hey, you better be nice to me, pal, because I'm the last person in the family that doesn't wanna climb up there and strangle you!
--> '''Robert''': Oh, a height joke. thank you, your majesty. Yeah, it's very refreshing after all the bull-in-the-ass jokes.
--> '''Debra''': I think you ''loved'' that bull. I think you were so happy he found you because he's two-ton excuse for your life! That's right: You were a victim before that bull. You've been a victim your whole life because there's nothing easier than playing the victim, is there, Robert?
--> '''Robert''': ...Why are you picking on me?
--> '''Debra''': See? Again! "My mother doesn't pay enough attention to me." "Raymond has a better life than me." "Wah wah wah!"
--> '''Robert''': I don't say "wah wah wah".
--> '''Debra''': You're sounding like that ''now''!
--> '''Robert''': That's because I just ''said'' "wah wah wah"! Listen, bad stuff happens to me, I don't imagine these things. I'm just reporting the facts.
--> '''Debra''': The fact is, you love to suffer. That's why you were so mad about having to leave your parents' house.
--> '''Robert''': Are you kidding? I couldn't wait to get out of there.
--> '''Debra''': Really? You don't seem so happy here.
--> '''Robert''': I have a milk situation.
--> '''Debra''': You love being at your parents' house because that's the ''holy land'' of self-pity! You weren't unhappy because you only had three more weeks to stay there; you were unhappy because you ''only'' had three more weeks to stay there! (at this point, Robert breaks down and cries loudly)

--> '''Debra''': Ray's right; how am I supposed to know I upset you if you don't say anything to me? I'm supposed to be your best friend!
--> '''Robert''': I'm supposed to be her husband! I'm your husband! Don't you know, after all these years, to tell me immediately when Raymond screws up? YOU PAGE ME AT WORK!
--> '''Marie''': I must say, Amy, before you came into the family, we were all just open with each other. We'd say whatever was on our mind. And now... We have to tiptoe around your feelings.
--> '''Ray''': That's not fair, Amy!
--> '''Frank''': Yeah, see what you did, Amy? (Amy cries) Oh jeez, there she goes again.

--> '''Ray''': Don't give up. The right lady is out there somewhere.
--> '''Robert''': Thanks.
--> '''Ray''': I mean it.
--> '''Debra''': What a load of crap. "The right lady is out there." Well guess what? You're never gonna find her. You know why? Because you don't want to; you're alone because that's what you want.
--> '''Robert''': I believe you're looking for the meeting across the street.
--> '''Debra''': Let me tell you something. You've created an image of this ideal woman, so that when regular women: Regular, wonderful, real women, fall short, you reject them.
--> '''Robert''': No.
--> '''Debra''': YES, yes, and that way you never have to settle down, and everyone can still feel sorry for poor lonely you.
--> '''Robert''': Look, I may not be the greatest catch in the world, but I don't think I should just settle.
--> '''Debra''': I'm not asking you to ''settle'', Robert, but you're not going to be happy if every time you discover a flaw in somebody, you go to somebody else. Because that somebody else is going to have her own flaws. Nobody's perfect.

--> '''Frank''': Oh boo hoo, woe is me. You know what I think? I think you need to get off your pity pot and act like a man. I mean, gimme a break, Nancy! (...) What did I always tell you?
--> '''Sam''': (quietly) Quit crying and suck it up.
--> '''Frank''': WHAT?!
--> '''Sam''': (loudly) Quit crying and suck it up!
--> '''Frank''': That's right, quit crying and suck it up, you whiny baby!

--> '''Ray''': Why would you read my private journal?
--> '''Marie''': Because I wanted to know what was in there.

--> '''Ray''': Why do you gotta be so negative all the time?
--> '''Gerard''': Because I'm not very happy.

--> '''Debra''': Ray, look at me. I am rubbing lotion on my hands. Do you know ''why'' I rub lotion on my hands?
--> '''Ray''': Because it's... hand cream?

--> '''Ray''': What about me?
--> '''Debra''': You're ''FINE'', you're married to me! All of you! Come ''on''!

--> '''Ray''': You're trying to make me feel guilty.
--> '''Debra''': No, I'm not.
--> '''Ray''': You're just like my mother.
--> '''Debra''': Why do you have to insult me? We're ''talking''.

--> '''Ray''': It just snowballed from one tiny little lie!
--> '''Marie''': So when you lied ''right to my face'', you consider that a tiny little lie?

--> '''Ray''': Does the term "angry sex" mean anything to you? (Bernie and Gianni exchange sly "yeah" remarks)
--> '''Bernie''': You mean like when the wife is mad because we wrap it up a little too soon?
--> '''Ray''': No. (Bernie looks disappointed)

--> '''Ray''': You guys get your mail yet?
--> '''Marie''': No. Why?
--> '''Ray''': Because I was just wondering because we didn't get ours either, you know, and sometimes we might get something of yours, and you might get something of ours.
--> '''Frank''': What do you get of mine?
--> '''Ray''': You know, I don't know, just junk mail.
--> '''Frank''': Like what?
--> '''Ray''': Whatever. uh, flyers and coupons.
--> '''Frank''': Where are they?
--> '''Ray''': I throw them out.
--> '''Frank''': You throw out coupons? That's money!
--> '''Ray''': Look, I'm just, all I'm saying is that you might get some of my mail.
--> '''Frank''': Well, how much were the coupons for?
--> '''Ray''': I don't know!
--> '''Frank''': Jeez-a-loo! Did you get the one for carpet cleaning?
--> '''Ray''': I don't know. Maybe.
--> '''Frank''': That's a $10 coupon! I was looking for that one!
--> '''Ray''': Look, dad, I'll give you $20 if you stop talking about this!
--> '''Frank''': You think I won't take it. I'll take it!
--> '''Ray''': I'll give it to ya!
--> '''Frank''': It would teach you a lesson! Come on!
--> '''Marie''': No! no! you're not taking Ray's money!
--> '''Frank''': I'm gonna take it because how else is he gonna learn? ''He's gotta stop throwing out people's mail!''

--> '''Robert''': IT WAS MEEEEE!!! You should be happy with me, I told him to get you that book. It was my idea, not Raymond's, me, mine, ''all'' me!
--> '''Ray''': Oh, Robert-
--> '''Robert''': Oh, you never even ''heard'' of "To Kill a Mockingbird"!
--> '''Ray''': Oh ''yes'' I did!
--> '''Robert''': You did ''not''. You never read the book, you never saw the movie. I bet you didn't even know there ''was'' a movie about it! Huh? Who was the star of the movie, Raymond?
--> '''Ray''': Well what does it-
--> '''Robert''': ''GREGORY PECK'', Gregory Peck! He played Atticus Finch, Gregory Peck! "All right, Scout, step aside while I shoot this rabid dog." He won the Oscar in 1962, ya MORON!!!
--> '''Ray''': ...What's ''this'' guy talkin' about?

--> '''Frank''': Hey Robert... you're not gonna believe this...
--> '''Robert''': ''Again?'' (Frank nods) All right, come on... (Robert helps Frank back to the bathroom)
--> '''Frank''': Bring the newspaper.

--> '''Debra''': You know, if you break your promise, I'll know.
--> '''Ray''': (seductively) That's right, and then... you'll have to punish me.
--> '''Debra''': Oh I'll punish you.
--> '''Ray''': (smiling) Yeah?
--> '''Debra''': Seriously, Ray; I'll ''hurt'' you. (Debra leaves, and Ray tries to follow her) Work, Ray!

--> '''Ray''': Did you two do, uh... (has a sly look on his face)
--> '''Robert''': Do ''what'', Raymond?
--> '''Ray''': ...The "huckle buckle"?

--> '''Margaret''': (her eyes are closed) If you're the angel of death, I'm ready!
--> '''Ray''': ...I'm not the angel of death.
--> '''Margaret''': (opens eyes) Then you could use a mint.

* SeperatedAtBirthCasting: Fred Stoller as Cousin Gerard. Lampshaded in "Cousin Gerard", when much to his horror, Ray realises that he looks like, sounds like and apparently is just as annoying as Gerard is.

--> '''Debra''': Ok, robert, listen. Stop feeling so sorry for yourself.

** In another episode, after Ray is accused of something: