Reviews: Last Action Hero
Why Do People Defend This Movie?
Almost everyone knows the infamous NC review on this movie, and I admit to being confused with it. It was obviously a satire, and not once did he call it that during the review. But to his credit, he did make me aware of the movie, and after seeing many comments about the movie being funny from its rabid fanbase, I finally decided to Netflix it. And it was pretty funny...until Danny got sucked into the movie. Most of the jokes in this movie consist of Danny pointing out the action movie cliches before they happened in a VERY unfunny and obnoxious manner. This kid would not shut up and seemed determined to convince Arnold's character, Jack Slater, that he was imaginary. Why? What would that accomplish? That's where almost all the humor comes from. And it's a weak joke, especially when compared to MST 3 K's riffs. Show, don't tell you stupid writers! On top of that, what is up with the world that Jack Slater lives in? Why is there a cartoon cat in the movie? Why are all of these buddy pairs in the movie? I wouldn't mind so much if Jack lived in action-movie world, except LAH repeatedly stated that the world he was living in was "Jack Slater IV" over and over again. Is Jack Slater IV the Rocky IV of movies or something? Because before the main character got sucked into the movie, it was practically normal. Also, the movie's pacing is awful. There are long stretches where the movie has no action and doesn't even try to make a joke. And it keeps on creating climaxes, only for the movie to continue long after the climax is over. Padding at its worst, people. Even after the final climax, it takes too long to get Slater back into the movie. And why the hell was the Grim Reaper necessary? Just get him into the movie and end it! Honestly, while not as bad as a Seltzerburg film, I don't get why people defend this. It doesn't have much action or jokes, Danny never shuts up, and I hate how the movie thinks that just because you get sucked into an action movie, you can parody any action cliche you want. The action is good, of course, and I really laughed at how the bad guy can kill with no repercussions in New York. Maybe if the entire story took place in an action movie world (not Jack Slater world) and Danny wasn't in it, it could have been good. Instead, it's really confusing, it fails as a satire, and it fails as an action film.
Rubber Baby Buggy Bumper!
When I saw the NC review of the movie, I went out and bought it again, having not seen it in quite some time. Having watched it many times after, I have to agree with those who think the Critic saw the movie in the wrong light. For started, the movie was a real action movie, it was a parody. For the critic to miss this obvious clue is a rare slip for the good reviewer. Mc Tiernan and Arnold were just having a jab at themselves, sadly not counting on Jurrasic Park coming for their box office. The pros of the movie are quite simple. It's a parody and a shoot'em up action film. The look of the world is exactly what you see in an 80's-90's action movie. The women are predictably perfect, the criminals incompetant, and the cops wholly lackluster. And to see the idea of the buddy cop movie brought to life like it was, the crowning moment being Whiskers, was a sight to see indeed. It's also almost a fanfic of Mc Tiernan's movies, going into the background and showing the reality of Slater's life, how lonely and unfufilled he is. Cons, of course, are the pacing. At first, Benedict and Slater in the real world was an amazing look at how reality does ensue when the movie ends, but as the ending closed it fatigued, the final moments feeling a little forced. And, of course, the sad knowledge that we'll probably never see Benedicts plans come to fruition. I guess the Last Action Hero, in the end, is a true Tropers movie. It subverts, averts, inverts, frappes and dices. If you have nothing else to watch and you find it, give it a go.