Trope Co. Incident Reports.

3/22/2023

Fuck you Big Steve from the Trope Co. incident log!

-Sam

3/22/2023

Can someone tell me what this message is doing here?

~Oopity

3/27/2023

I have no idea what happened. I heard a loud crashing sound and now there's a giant crater behind the building, where the town with that awesome ice cream shop used to be. I've questioned Bob about it, but he claims to know nothing.

~Oopity

3/27/23

> Be me

> Remember to check my mailbox for the first time in ages

> The little red arm-swingy-dealy thing or whatever it is called is flipped up

> Look inside

> It's a game?

> No info about developer, age rating, console, or anything else on the box. Just a little green house logo and the words "SBURB" and "BETA"

> tropetansuspicious.jpeg

Should I play it??

- Moe

3/27/23

DO NOT!

-BackSet1

3/27/23

TORCH IT, MOE. Bob is absolutely trying to use that game to kill/blackmail you. Feel free to borrow one of our state-of-the-art particle disintegration guns.

-Pogakure

3/29/2023

I caught one of the interns snooping around the building just now. He told me he was looking for, "particle disintegration guns" and that, "some guy named Bob asked me to get one." Point is, Bob's going to find out about whatever equipment we have to keep hidden from him if we mention it here.

~Oopity

3/30/23

I couldn't find the particle disintegration guns so I just took the disc out of the box and stomped on the stupid thing until it was broken into small enough pieces to fit in cake batter without making it so crunchy that people notice. If you find a cake in my office, DON'T eat it. It's for a super top secret project and may or may not contain at least one carcinogen.

- Moe

3/30/23

Oh, I wanted to play it.

-NXPY

3/30/2023

It appears Dvorak has forgotten about this log. I suspect Bob may have erased his memories. Anyone who claims not to know about this log is to report to the auditorium on floor 6 for a screening of the "How To File an Incident Report" tutorial video.

~Oopity

Edit: oh shit.

Edited by OopityDoop on Mar 31st 2023 at 12:16:52 PM

3/31/2023

Someone turned the building into a shit ton of shipping containers, and there are giants outside...PLAYING JENGA WITH THEM?! SWEET MERCIFUL SHIT!

3/31/23

Someone's mad that they don't know how to play.

-NAPY

3/31/2023

No, I know how to play. The problem is the building looks like it's about to *CRASH*

And there goes the top 99% of our office space.

~Oopity

03/31/23

SWEET, MERCIFUL CRAP! MY CAR!

-Dvorak

Edited by dvorak on Mar 31st 2023 at 1:23:05 AM

04/01/23

A criminal has broken into the building, stole precious tropes, let Bob do anything he want, and let all the dogs out...is what I would be saying if I were you guys! Have fun! You really need better security, they're idiots.

~ Triangle

4/1/23

My Ferrari has been replaced by a clown car. Every single one of the cars in the parking lot have been replaced with clown cars. When asked about this phenomenon, Bob, who was removing his luggage from one of the clown cars, refused to comment. Commencing a further investigation.

-Pogakure

Edited by Pogakure on Apr 1st 2023 at 11:53:42 AM

04/01/23

And mine's pancaked under a shipping container. Insurance ain't cover that!

-Dvorak

Edited by dvorak on Apr 1st 2023 at 7:45:04 AM

4/1/23

This is why I just take the bus.

-BackSet1

4/2/23

Wait, you guys don't have teleportation circles set up in your offices? I can teach you how to set one up. Come by my office if you have time. You'll find it on top of Dvorak's car.

-Apocalemur

4/2/2023

I was headed to the break room to grab my lunch when I saw balloons and streamers everywhere, a huge cake on the table, and a banner hanging from the ceiling reading, "HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!" Bob jumped out from behind the fridge and yelled, "SURPRISE!" Wait a minute. Is today the 1 year anniversary of the day Dvorak, BackSet, and I started writing rules for Bob, and he's celebrating that? That would explain the three presents in the corner.

~Oopity

Edited by OopityDoop on Apr 3rd 2023 at 8:44:04 AM

4/3/2023

I figured out what was up with Wanbo. It wasn't full of viruses, but 14 terabytes of H-games, and not even the good kind. Also, since Bob wasn't the one to clean the robo dog thing he can't keep it.

~Oopity

04/03/23

Wanbo is not available for "research purposes." Just admit you want to see what games Bob downloaded to the robot dog.

-Dvorak

PS, No, Bob, you may not have them back. You're not supposed to have them, remember?

Edited by dvorak on Feb 11th 2024 at 8:19:46 AM

4/3/2023

You think I wanted to know what kinds of unspeakable horrors Bob could have placed on Wanbo? I spent pretty much the whole morning repeatedly moving files into the recycle bin on a spare computer and emptying it. I will admit I opened one of the games, but closed it 3 seconds in after being greeted with what I can only describe as a screen full of H-game Squick. Anyone who's into that crap needs therapy is all I can say.

~Oopity

Edited by OopityDoop on Apr 3rd 2023 at 11:34:37 AM

04/03/23

Just in general. You'd be surprised at what Wanbo's waiting list looked like, and how quickly it emptied after posting my last message.

-Dvorak

4/6/2023

Captain Lou Albano seems to have risen from the dead and is doing the Mario outside the building's entrance.

~Oopity

4/7/23

Went to Bob's "slow-food" restaurant. I hated it. Took way too long and they gave me spaghetti carbanana. No, you read that right. They put a tire and bananas in spaghetti.

-NAPY