Paranoia RPG - Trope Complex

(G'night.)

Lanius blushes and looks at him oddly, but goes along with him.

TESLAA briefly considered forcing WOLF to pres the button and leaving him a grenade but thought better of it - he'd probably end up exploding them knowing his track record. Once the truck and everyone in it are in range TESLAA sighs and presses the button to teleport them. "Friend Computer, where is the nearest termination booth? I would like to report myself for treason and execute myself promptly."

Greetings, Teslaa. Unfortunately, analysis of your mission footage so far shows that multiple undocumented structural modifications have occurred in WNK sector. My advice would be that you try asking one of the Oompas.

- - - - - -

Everyone else arrives in a large briefing hall, on stage. There are thousands of heavily drugged infrared level citizens, staring at the giant video screen, in the middle of a how-to instructional video on how to properly take a shower. Most of the video is, of course, heavily pixelated.

edited 11th Mar '15 9:55:09 AM by Nodrog

(I will be travelling this weekend for a family event, so probably won't post anything new to Monday. Feel free to take this time to fill out any Pre-Emptive Excuse and/or Alibi Decleration Forms◊ you need so that Friend Computer will know exactly what it should be blaming you all for. )

An Oompa wanders into the teleportation room. It will do any reasonable task Teslaa asks it to, such as lead the way to a termination chamber. However, Teslaa MUST ask in song form.

edited 13th Mar '15 3:11:10 AM by Nodrog

I have returned. I hope all citizens enjoyed their mandatory happiness on Pi Day (3/14/15)

"I enjoyed my mandatory happiness very much friend computer."

"There is never a moment where I am not overwhelmed by bliss."

With a final, exhausted "Frak it all!" TESLAA-R-Coi-1 places her laser pistol against her head and fires. TESLAA-R-Coi-2 appears in the infrared room beside her team and replies to Friend computer, "I hae experienced a gracious sufficiency of happiness, Friend Computer." She says, "Alright, extract your digits from any sphincters they may be currently occupying and let's get to the briefing room." She walks briskly to the briefing room, ignoring the drooling infrared masses.

"Harsh," Silence notes following Tessla.

"Probably would've done the same if I stayed behind to press the button, but wiht like twice as many explosions." He grabs LANIUS's hand. "Come on Friend Computer gets to kill us now!~" WOLF leads LANIUS back to the briefing room following TESLAA and SILENCE.

edited 16th Mar '15 6:43:22 AM by WolfAmongGods

Attention, trouble shooters. You have 45 minutes to report for mandatory debriefing. Wolf, please remember despite the name that you ARE expected to keep your underwear on at all time during the debriefing, as well as all other clothing.

Silence picks up a brisk pace to make it to the Debriefing Room on the time.

Lanius glances at Wolf. "Do I want to know why Friend Computer specified you keep your clothes on?"

"Because Friend Computer is trying to obfuscate the real definition of 'Debriefing'. It actually means 'Massive, party-killing explosion." WOLF smiled endearingly.

Lanius looks at Wolf with concern. "I'm pretty sure that Friend Computer would never do something like that. C'mon, let's go to debriefing."

Using her impressive Alpha Complex Knowledge TESLAA-2 successfully guides her team to the briefing room with time to spare and takes a seat.

Lanius takes a seat as well, next to Wolf.

WOLF drums the table at his seat. "Man that WILL guy was weaksauce wasn't he? He barely even tried to kill some of us. Pfft, I've been killed harder much more obscure pop culture references."

Greetings, Trouble Shooters. Have you found out why sector W-N-K was reactivated?

-your response(s) here-

Excellent! We will now wait for Loyalty Officer Ava-R-ICE to report on any acts of disloyalty that occurred on the mission.

-pause-

''Trouble Shooters, what happened to Ava-R-ICE? Surely you realize she was my favorite and thus did your best to protect her?"

"She has been rather quiet. I must say Friend Computer we were never assigned to watch over her, and to assume you have given us extra missions is tantamount to treason itself. I speak only for myself when I never assumed any extra details and only operated into what parameters I had," Silence notes adjusting his hat, a placated and pleasant look on his face.

WOLF sits perfectly still, accepting whatever fate Friend Computer will see fit to bestow upon the group. WOLF fondly remembers AVA who, the best of his recollection, had the most charisma and swagger. Besides LANIUS of course.

Very well, Trouble Shooters. In the absence of your designated loyalty officer, please state all acts of disloyalty and/or treason which you have observed within your organization.

A panel in the ceiling slides back and an automated machine gun, with a blinking red light mounted on it, descends from the ceiling and takes aim at the doorway, ready to shoot anyone who tries to run.

"Well I can only report that a earlier version of Wolf broke my assigned mask, but he is dead now so that act of disloyalty is accounted for and dealt with."

"All of my acts of treason have been accounted for and punished appropiately via means of amusing self-terminations."

"Excepting your refusal to sacrifice yourself for the team leader and the rest of the team. Not to mention assaulting myself and SILENCE with filling out appropriate forms."