As short as my run?

i think i mostly want to see what happens when this whole place breaks apart

Quite possibly.

(But your shot at hosting was epic. )

As long as, uh...

What was that one run where like after the longest time there was two guys left and they both shot the air?

(also thxu)

i think i mostly want to see what happens when this whole place breaks apart

Surt's.

Funnily enough, I wasn't in that game.

Ah yes, Surt's.

... Actually that doesn't seem as long as I remember.

But anyways!

I guess we'd better start shooting people.

i think i mostly want to see what happens when this whole place breaks apart

IIRC, Zero Dark Flirty's was longer. It also had two survivors left... I dont think either survivor lived.

Oh, and I have already made my move.

edited 31st Jan '15 9:45:46 PM by IchigoPockyChama

Um... shouldn't we have an update by now?

I was busy last night, and none of it had to do with the Super Bowl.

I'll have it up later.

And here we go. This one was a doozy, lemme tell ya.

Round 1

As the rider rides off into the forest, another unwanted guest is busy hiding in the bushes, snickering to himself. Then, with a ruffling of leaves, he swiftly moves to a open stable.

"Now if I only knew where they put that bag..."

Sitting there thinking, thinking about vantage points, guards, apples (he was hungry), he's suddenly caught off guard by the soft caw of a baby chocobo.

"Oh. Lovely."

He bolts for an open window, and he climbs on a shelf to get a good look at the manor grounds. The guards, before having just one or two of them standing outside, now numbered about half a dozen and this was only on one side of the manor. The thief creeps back and realizes this might be harder than he thought.

"Just relax... I—I can do this."

He takes in a deep breath.

"I can do—"

"Oi!"

Uh oh. Who's there?

"Wut ah yew do—ULP"

Well, that was a relatively simple problem to solve. Anyway, he hides the body in the hay, trying not to wake the stable's denizens in the process.

"Well, one down... Six to go..."

---

•—-•—-

She's not dead...

•—-•—-

She can't be. She's just...gone...

•—•—

She's gone...

•—•—

Don't worry, my sweet...

•-•—-•-•—-

I'll be right beside you...

••-••-••-••-

Just a little longer... I'll be right there beside you...

••-••—- —- — — - - - -

---

"You're seriously not going to do that."

"I am."

"You're joking. You're f***ing joking."

"No, I'm not. I'm gonna do it."

"Man, it's dangerous! You think Ajora'll bless ya and keep ya safe because of some noble blood? She and this cliff don't discriminate, lemme tell ya!"

"Don't do it, Earl! You've got a family, a wife, a child—"

"Enough! I might not have the blessing of Ajora, but I have faith. I have faith that I'll make it past the rocks, the rocks that'd skewered many who have jumped off this cliff into the waters below. I have faith that I will swim back to shore, and my wife and son'll be there to greet me."

"Chris!"

"...Emma?"

"Chris! I know you can do this, I know you can!"

-"Come on, dad! I believe in you!"

"Don't listen to them! They're biased, of course they'll want you to succeed!"

"What say you? My family believes in me! I think that's enough reason for me to jump!"

"No!"

"What are you—"

A rush.

That's all it was. As he fell, down, down, down, he felt the wind pushing against his face, he felt the rain catching on his clothes, raindrops sailing through the sky before impacting and exploding into a million little droplets and ceasing to exist.

And then, he felt the ocean. The first thing to touch was his fingertips, seeing a chill through his body, then his hands, his head and arms, and finally, everything else.

"Chris! Are you alright?"

"Dad!"

About twenty feet from the nearest rock, the Earl rises from the water like a whale in the sea. He bobs up and down with the rolling waves, and he waves to his family on the shore.

However, maybe it wasn't such a good idea to do this during a storm. It's not like the waves could...bring him closer and closer to that one rock, and it's not like one could be just a bit stronger than most others and...push him into the rock and, oh, knock him out in the water...

Such a shame really.

---

Now, back at the manor, the thief is in a pickle. Over the course of thirty minutes, he had searches about two fifths of the entire house before alerting everyone in the damn place to his presence. He's been dodging gunshots, pots and pans, children's toys, more gunshots, a spell(?), and the cries of that same baby chocobo.

"Shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot..."

He busts through the doorway, "That is mahogany," and he runs headlong into the forest.

"The hell is he?"

"There 'e is! Right there!"

A gunshot rings throughout the forest, flocks of birds rising from the trees and packs of animals and monsters scurrying away.

"Did ya get 'em?"

"Hold up, hold up..."

"Wait! There's movement!"

"He's still alive?"

The thief, far away from any of his pursuers, stops by the river, breathing heavily. And, y'know, there's this odd feeling in his leg, almost as if—oh, shoot.

"Ghh! Great Ajora, that's painful!"

However, as he lays by the river,, bleeding profusely from his wound, a bag floats on by.

"But that's—"

Reflexively, he jumps into the river, regardless of any injury. He swims towards the back, getting stopped and further injured by large rocks protruding from underwater. The water behind him turns a slight red as he swims behind the bag. After a while, however, he's swam and swam and can swim no longer, and he lets it go, arriving on a sandy shore. There, he lays, and there, he dies.

---

Actions

• Nine Tailed Cat(stupidity)Self
• Jondanger23(heart break)Self
• Earl of Sandvich(lack of weatherman)Self
• bRaHiAn1(visiting the local festival and overshot the dunking ball)Air
• The Hobo Tortle(inhaling)Air
• Ichigo Pocky Chama(desk)Air

---

Surviving Players

• bRaHiAn1
• The Hobo Tortle
• Ichigo Pocky Chama
• Earl of Sandvich
• Surt
• jdj42
• Jondanger23
• Nine Tailed Cat

---

Next round begins in 24~36 hours.

You know, I haven't seen jdj and Surt in awhile. Should they be kicked out of the game for inactivity? It'd be a little unfair if me, Brah and Hobo were all offed but they survive only to do jack.

I figure if they go three rounds without doing anything, they should be kicked out, like what Earl did with me that one time, and then I finally remembered I was in this game and shot someone even though I would've won if I'd just shot the air.

i think i mostly want to see what happens when this whole place breaks apart

What if the other three all get killed next round, though? Would that mean nobody won?

It does sound like a good idea though.

Also, Surt hasn't posted anything in the fora since December, and jdj seems to have completely abandoned FG. It's not very likely either will come back.

edited 2nd Feb '15 6:29:30 PM by IchigoPockyChama

.... well idk then :/

i think i mostly want to see what happens when this whole place breaks apart

So, has Mage got the next update ready or...?

I'll have it up tomorrow. Sorry if the updates have been slow. Life likes to throw wrenches at things.

Aw, okay.

Round 2

The winds blow harsh, for it was a cold winter's night that dear old Count Tortle was sitting by the fireplace, examining a peculiar stone, yet another one of the Zodiac Stones given to prominent figures in Ivalice. However, Alexandra, his most trusted top guard, throws open the doors and yells, "There's someone here!"

"What do you mean?"

"They've been cutting through the guards like butter, sir!"

"What about margarine?"

"...Sir?"

"No, I'm just saying, why can't the expression be cut through like margarine? Whenever I have butter, it's always hard and—"

"Sir, with all due respect, we need you to get your ass down there and help us."

"Alexandra, remember. You answer to me—"

"I won't be able to answer to no one if you're dead."

"...Good point."

He takes the lance off his fireplace mantle and pockets the Scorpio stone, running after Alexandra as the two are joined by other guards and make their way downstairs...

---

Ten minutes earlier...

Oh, yes! This stone is a godsend! How that boy got it, I don't know, but he can't say anything now!

Lady Chama cackles as she holds the Pisces stone, its faint, blue light illuminating her hand and part of her face, should anyone come up to see her.

"With this, I'll be able to get rid of that damn count! I'll be having his farmland after he's dead!"

Soon, the stone starts to glow brighter, enveloping Lady Chama in a bright light visible for miles around.

---

"Now, who exactly are we fighting?"

"We don't know, sir."

"You don't know? Oh, no wonder it's been able to blow through everything like you said it was."

"Why not take a look at it yourself?"

"Erp, well, uai... Oh, bugger, let's see what this bastard—"

Peeking out the door, he sees a large...thing...you know what? This guy drew a picture of him, so I'm just going to show it to you.

If I remember correctly, I believe this Lucavi is Mateus. It shares its name with some ancient emperor, oddly enough. Maybe some people had a bone to pick with that guy, and they thought it was a good idea to name a Lucavi after him?

Anyway, it, or rather she, was using her lance to cut through the ranks easily. Even the most seasoned of soldiers and officers called in from the town were being massacred by the demon, all the while she laughed and laughed.

I know now that I can't go back, so I'll ruin him right here and now!

"Sir, what are we going to do?!"

"...We need the arquebuses now!"

"But sir—"

"Go on! You've had enough training with them!"

"Y-Yes, sir..."

Alexander, one of the officers, Brahian, and several others head outside into a shed. Meanwhile, Tort hides behind the door, clutching the stone in his hands. He contemplates activating the stone as a drop of sweat runs through his brow and down his face. Finally, drawing in one last breath in his human form, he closes his eyes, and a bright, red light engulfs him.

---

The room is lit up with gunfire, and shots echo through the walls into the village below.

"Let's blow this bastard to pieces! Soldiers, prepare another volley!"

However, before half could even open their powder horns, they were wiped fro the face of the earth by a swipe of Mateus' polearm.

Make of what little time you have left in this world, you filth.

The markup to use:

Suddenly, the doors burst open, and out comes another Lucavi, Cuchaliann.

Another Lucavi? But...but...there's no way.

Hello, Lady Chama. I see you've made yourself at home. Unfortunately, I'll have to ask you to leave.

I'll leave when you're dead!

The ensuing fight was brutal. Cuchaliann mostly relied on brute force, trying to beat Mateus into submission, but she could easily swipe at him from afar. However, it seemed Cuchaliann would win, pinning her down on the ground and slugging her over and over, all the while the arquebusiers shot at the two of them, firing at Mateus more heavily.

Dear Hobo, how misguided you are.

Grruh! Misguided?! How could you—

And then, all of a sudden, Mateus pushed Cuchaliann off and then sliced at him, opening up his stomach. He reeled back in pain, and then fell to the ground, dead. His body lights up, illuminating the whole room, and then, all that is left is the body of one Count Hobo Tortle.

However, she hadn't come out of the fight unscathed. After countless barrages of arquebus fire, she decides that she's had enough of those pesky bugs, and she proceeds to "flick" every single one of them away. All but two.

Alexandra lies injured and bleeding. One of the so,divers comes up and carries her way, only to be stopped by the Lucavi's polearm.

No! No one will esca—

A shot rings throughout the mansion. Mateus stumbles a bit, dropping the massive weapon and staggering about. Then, another shot, and she's now even worse off.

"Brahian!"

"Just go! Get everyone to safety!"

He keeps firing the guns of his fallen comrades, one by one, picking another one up as soon as he fires and tosses the one in his hands. After a minute of wasting away the ammunition, Mateus finally drops to the ground. Another flash of light, and all that is left is Lady Ichigo Chama.

"Her? She had been trying to get our farmlands for years!"

"But now Tort's dead. He had no heirs... Who will inherit the land?"

---

Actions

• bRaHiAn1(—)Ichigo Pocky Chama
• Ichigo Pocky Chama(Mythology Gag)The Hobo Tortle
• The Hobo Tortle(blood)Air

---

Surviving Players

• Ichigo Pocky Chama
• The Hobo Tortle
• bRaHiAn1
• jdj42
• Surt

---

I'm not sure what to do with jdj42 and Surt. Maybe just go two more rounds with Brahian taking the obvious course of action.

I volunteer as tribute.

i think i mostly want to see what happens when this whole place breaks apart

Holy shit! After all thst, we BOTH kicked the bucket?

Well, unless jdj and/or Surt suddenly show up to kick sone ass, I reckon Brah will reign supreme.

yo BMA do i win yet or wh

i think i mostly want to see what happens when this whole place breaks apart

Don't tell me he's buggered off too...

Don't worry, Brah. If he does jack by the time Monday comes, I'll throw you a winner's ceremony of sorts.

yaaaaaaaaaay

i think i mostly want to see what happens when this whole place breaks apart

Alright games over.

Winner - brah Reward- the prize Prixe - all the money

I guess I could try hosting this time.

Probably going to be a theme park-themed (hehe) one.

edited 22nd Feb '15 8:10:07 AM by Jondanger23

Well, whoever's doing it, I'm in for the next one.