Noah (2014)

So, apparently, there's gonna be a movie about Noah starring Russell Crowe, Jennifer Connelly and Emma Watson. And Anthony Hopkins.

An article about the movie Noah.

Trailer 1.

Trailer 2.

What is your opinion on this? I'm a bit skeptical, though I could be wrong.

edited 7th Feb '14 6:44:00 PM by Quag15

It's got Emma Watson.

Thats nice I guess. Do we really need another Noah movie though?

Personally I hated Evan Almighty.

Likewise.

I think this is going to be a MEH movie.

Sorta annoys me that Noah's family and the population seen is all-white, considering they're supposed to be the ancestors of every race.

But hey, at least they included Methuselah.

It'll come, make a few million bucks, ruffle a few Christians' feathers and go.

I'm looking forward to this. Mostly because it's a Biblical movie that isn't another Jesus movie.

Why is everybody white?

Also why is this necessary? I'm pretty sure everybody knows this story already. What possible twist could they add on to it to make it worthwhile?

It's the same reason a movie about Jesus gets made every few years.

edited 7th Feb '14 9:58:22 PM by GethKnight

This time it has Russell Crowe!

edited 7th Feb '14 10:05:01 PM by Canid117

I have no clue who that is.

From Gladiator, Les Miserables, Man of Steel. He's a big name Hollywood actor.

And when is the last time there was a real Noah movie? Stuff like Evan Almighty don't count, because that's not about Noah. That's about some modern day guy finding out that he's gotta do the same thing as Noah. I can't think of a Noah equivalent of like how we have The Ten Commandments or Prince of Egypt for Moses.

edited 7th Feb '14 10:10:37 PM by stingerbrg

If it was a biblical movie made after the Golden Age of Hollywood I doubt it will find success. (Prince of Egypt aside)

Because Javert.

Anyway, back to your regularly scheduled Noah thread.

I think it's got the potential to be good; the Bible is as rich a collection of stories as any other and I for one would be happy to see more of them on the screen. I don't even mind if it evangelizes (depending on the content) because films are entitled to have messages if they can convey them competently. My worry is just that, from the trailers, it doesn't look very good. Also, Ray Winstone. "Cor, luvaduck, fackin' 'ell Noah, ain't yer old china gettin' a ride in yer sherbet? It's fackin' rainin' 'ere!" It seems London existed before God destroyed the earth.

Now imagine if this was in the movie. I wonder what it would be like to have a shitfaced Russell Crowe.

You could say the same thing about a majority of book adaptations and a vast majority of action films, though.

I would watch a movie about shitfaced Russell Crowe.

Only if he headbutted some kangaroos.

A few issues I have with this movie:

1. The flood is written as a "history", not a "narrative", and is only a few chapters long, so in order for it to run over 2 hours, there would have to be quite a bit of embellishment. Not to mention that there is always the tendency for Bible adaptations to end up doing the Theme Park Version of the source material. I would rather see an adaptation done on a character who actually had a narrative to adapt.
2. As mentioned before, everyone is white. Noah and his wife are supposed to be the ancestors of everyone living today, so one would expect a live adaptation cast to be extremely multi-racial. At least The Bible miniseries cast was multi-racial at certain parts.
3. Of all the things for the trailer to have, I found it rather odd that there was neither mention nor depiction of demons and Nephilim. If I were making a Noah movie, I would make sure that gets in the trailer. It seems rather odd that they would downplay that and instead replace them with a human adversary.

The one thing I do like is that it does seem to include Noah's dad Lamech and his grandpa Methuselah (both were likely alive during the building of the ark but died before the flood).

edited 8th Feb '14 3:07:31 PM by shiro_okami

The trailer did have some armored guy thrust his sword into the ground and set the world on fire. 1:57 of this trailer. Could be a Nephillim or a daemon.

I'm pretty sure that's the angel guarding the Garden of Eden. Therefore, a flashback or exposition scene.

Genesis 3:24 So he drove out the man; and he placed at the east of the garden of Eden Cherubims, and a flaming sword which turned every way, to keep the way of the tree of life.

edited 8th Feb '14 4:20:58 PM by Tuckerscreator

Because the ages given in Genesis can actually be added up, in an intelligent way, since it says how old the people were when the relevant child was born, Methuselah appears to have died in the year of the Flood.

edited 8th Feb '14 4:19:52 PM by Zendervai

Why make a movie about the Flood? Isn't it sad that the human race got so bad, the God had to wipe out all land life except the ones on the Ark? Hope they can establish the human race as completely evil without making the rating too high. Off Screen Villainy?