"...Oh, noob. How you amuse me so."
Once apon a time, there was a fat, genre savvy 12 year old with a normal boring life. Then, one of his friends recommended TV Tropes, a website that cited the conventions other works used. The result was... not that different, really. He just ended up opening more tabs, is all.
If those big, light blue, and bolded letters, right above the quote didn't give you any signals, that kid was the Eternal Noob; or as I like to call him, me. You can call me Sprinkles, Eternal, or Catpoo. Either three will do! Or make your own nickname. That works.
I'll be completely honest with you, my dear reader; I can be a bit bitter, and insensitive at times, and worst of all, I love shitty, awkward Similies and metaphors. Rest assured, I wouldn't bite on purpose. I think. Maybe?
Just in case I fuck up, big time, I have a spare account in the form of mrsunshinesprinkles
Pictured: A bright, handsome, dark, and tall young man◊
who is most definitely not me. for reals
open/close all folders
This bro is 100% pure...
This. There's really not a lot to me.
- Asperger's Syndrome
- Butt Monkey: Subverted. While misfortune can strike me from time to time, the good in my life simply outweighs the bad.
- Deadpan Snarker: I love me some snark.
- Guilty Pleasures: To be completely honest, I'm not that picky. That being said, some of the stuff I enjoy makes me ashamed of myself.
- Nose Bleed: Happens often.
- Old Shame: When I look back at the things I've done and said in the past, I just want to slap myself so hard. In particular, my first few months on this site are ones I will never forget, though desperately want to. I was insensitive, and forceful, and, in a glorious chain of fuck ups, alienated two of my closer friends here. The people on this site helped me grow, and move on, which is something I am grateful for.
- Self-Deprecation: It keeps me grounded.
Like I said...Not a lot.
What I like:
- Fullmetal Alchemist (Both series)
- My personal favorite anime/manga ever. Also, one of the first series I ever watched. Though the manga is better...
- Card Captor Sakura
- The World God Only Knows
- Death Note
- A well thought out, meticulously planned dick waving competition. Forget about analyzing its themes and symbolism, and just enjoy the jerk vs dick battle of wits.
- Dragon Ball
- A good old tale about friendship, fighting, adventure, and ki blasts.
- Haruhi Suzumiya
- (I now know where I can get the books) Mind boggling, intriguing, and surprising
- Gakuen Alice
- Seitokai Yakuindomo
- defies any kind of modesty there is
- Detective Conan
- This is the first anime I ever got hooked on.
- Samurai Champloo: Ironically enough, I love Champloo, but I haven't even glanced at Cowboy Bebop...
- Captain Tsubasa
- Rurouni Kenshin
- See Dragon Ball for my opinion on this one. Well, minus the ki blasts
- Fate/stay night- I was attached to the Studio Deen anime, way back when, so this is more of sentimental value. Yes, I was easily impressed back then...
- Mirai Nikki: Same reasons I love Death Note, plus, like it or not, Yuno Gasai is extremely memorable.
- YuYu Hakusho
- Chibi Maruko-chan
- GeGeGe no Kitaro
- Jojos Bizarre Adventure: Parts II, V, and IV: Over the top, action packed, and filled with memorable characters.
- Part VII deserves special mention: The two leads are some of my favorite characters in manga, the insanity of the series is still intact, the intrigue and the intense action will keep you on the edge of your seat, and in both the classical and internetz meaning, it really is epic.
- Powerpuff Girls
- Phineas and Ferb
- SpongeBob SquarePants 1-3
- Fairly OddParents
- Rocko's Modern Life
- Courage the Cowardly Dog
- Anything made by Walt Disney, Chuck Jones, and Hanna-Barbera (Last one's more out of admiration, rather than actual quality)
- Dexter's Laboratory
- Pokémon Special
- The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy
- Bat Man
- Calvin and Hobbes
- Adventure Time: Random humor, with surprising attention to detail put in world building and continuity.
- The Spectacular Spiderman: An amazing show that reminded us of why we love Spiderman. Too bad it ended too soon.
- The Amazing World of Gumball
Favorite Video Games
- Super Mario Bros. My personal favorite series of all time
- Super Mario Galaxy in particular is my favorite game ever. Yes, even more than 3 and Galaxy 2.
- The Portal games
- Creative, funny, haunting. Both of em.
- Team Fortress 2
- Crazy shooting blasty multiplayer fun
- Fallout 1,2, and 3.
- The series that redefined the RPG. Yes, a 13 year old has played the entire trilogy. My favorite in the series has to be 2, for being such a huge improvement from one, and although polarizing, has a sense of humor I can't help but love.
Goddamn that was written cutely. :3
- New Vegas is in a close second.
- Holy crap, Nostalgia: the series. What is there to HATE about Pokemon.
- Megaman and Megaman X
- THE 2D SHOOTING SIDESCROLLING KING. Especially 2 and the first X
- I am one of the few that prefers the classic series, compared to the Metroid Vania ones, despite difficulty as forgiving as a mobster, on a bad day.
- Fancy Pants Adventures
- It's a great flash game. PLAY IT NOW. ESPECIALLY 2.
- Both Wii and NES are the most awesome arcade style boxers ever. Also, fukkin hard. I literally gave up on Tyson, and a fighter I forgot in Title Defense.
- Dynasty Warriors: I've only played 5 for the PSP, but I don't care. Mindless plowing through a thousand enemies really brightens up a Sunday Morning, let me tell you.
- Every Ed Mcmillen game I've played so far. Time Fcuk, Super Meat Boy, Aether, The Binding of Isaac, and the like.
- Kid Icarus: Uprising: Either you totally love it, or despise it, and even though it took a bit of getting used to, to me, this game's pure fun.
- Hotline Miami: Satisfies my itch for blood and guts, as well as challenge.
- Batman: Arkham City
- Miami Shark: It's a very short flash game, and you'll probably only replay it a couple of times, but brevity and repetition aside, I have never felt so much joy than those ten minutes I spent playing this and the rest of the series.
- Vampire: The Masquerade – Bloodlines
Laugh your heart out Web Originals
My RPG Skillset
- Got This Idea from Mokona Zero, and decided that I wanted to do it too.
Eternal Noob's stats:
- Lvl: 15
- HP: 90/90 (Currently)
- Class: Load
- Physical Attack: 140/200
- Physical Defense: 100/200
- Magic Attack: 45/200
- Magical Defense: 20/200
- Speed: 30/200
- Elemental Affinity: Lightning (It is fast, and makes running away easier)/Water
- Social Skills: 150/200
- Default Weapon: Butter Knife
- Possible Weapons: Broken Bottle, Plastic Bag, Fists
- Default Shield: The bodies of fallen party members
- Willpower: -10/200
Eternal Noob's status effects
- "Apathy": The target becomes disinterested with everything in general. Vulnerable for 5 turns.
- "Tears": Eternal Noob's tears flood the battle field for 4 turns, once his health reaches 10%. 25% percent chance of slipping for everyone, including part members.
Eternal Noob's Spells/Special Attacks/Cheap Tricks
- "A Pony": Eternal Noob points and shouts "A PONY". Everyone is distracted for a turn, including party members.
- "Your Mom" Eternal Noob makes a Dirty Joke. The weight/Humor Of the joke all depends on chance.
- Humor Rating 1: No One Is Affected
- HR 2: Everyone wets their pants laughing. -1 damage for 9 turns.
- HR 3: Joke hurts everyone's feelings, including party members, and Eternal Noob Himself. -15 damage for everyone, for 5 turns.
- "THE NUTS!!!": Eternal Noob advises all party members to hit them in the sensitives. +17 Critical Chance for the rest of the battle, But Noob faints, due to herniating his lungs.
- If a character possesses at least 100 guts, or 150 Sadism, he may throw herniated lungs at enemies. The effects are either:
- KABEWM: The lungs explode, damaging all enemies.
- ...Ugh: Enemies without 160 Guts will be afflicted with "disgust".
- Make Love, Not War: Noob attempts to solve things peacefully. 1% chance of enemy peacefully backing away, and healing all party members, but 99% percent chance of increasing enemy's critical chance.
Pages I have greatly contributed to
All your piss goes here!
Thanks for reading my page all the way through.
Now go on with whatever you're doing
Ok. Back to killing pandas. Or pandies.
How the heck do you call a baby panda? ~Dhana Ragnarok