History Quotes / MustHaveCaffeine

->Professor Ozpin strolled leisurely through the cafeteria, a certain cheerful bounce to his step and a cup of steaming fresh coffee clutched contentedly in his hand. Coffee was of extreme importance to the professor, and today he had achieved the absolute perfect ratio of liquids to sugar. It was always a good day when good coffee was involved. Like a king admiring his lands, he proudly surveyed the student body, sitting in their respective groups and cliques. There was something special about this particular year of students, he thought. He couldn't put his finger on it, but they just all seemed [[CastOfSnowflakes predominantly exceptional, especially the new freshmen]].
->''[various shenanigans later]''
->The cafeteria filled with the shrieks of students as they frantically scrambled to avoid being drenched in the sprinklers' torrential downpour. Ozpin stood like a statue in the center of the room, amidst the chaos. His water-laden hair drooped over his face and concealed his expression. Ever so slowly, he tilted the cup to his lips and took an experimental sip. Somehow retaining his composure as he became more and more soaked, the professor walked slowly over to a table and set his coffee cup lightly on it. He then turned, sauntered over to the nearest trash bin and spat out the sip of coffee that he had kept in his mouth. Watered down coffee was disgusting, and the sugar ratio had been ruined by the extra liquid. He thought to himself that maybe he was wrong; this year's students were nothing special. In fact they were horrible and there should be a school-wide increase in the homework load for all of them.

->‘But what about what it’s doing to you?’\\

->"COFFFEE! THAT WONDERFUL, BLACK, LIFE GIVING BLOOD THAT IS ESSENTIAL TO SUSTAIN HUMAN LIFE. GIMMIE, GIMMIE, GIMMIE." My mind immediately shrieked.
-->--'''[[Series/{{Victorious}} Jade West]]''', ''[[https://m.fanfiction.net/s/10284289/1/ Across the Years]]''

->'''Lorelai''': I already had the longest day of my life and oh look, it's only 10! How nice!\\
'''Luke''': There's no coffee.\\
'''Lorelai''': That's not funny.\\
'''Luke''': I can get you herbal tea.\\
'''Lorelai''': This is not a herbal tea morning, this is a coffee morning.\\
'''Luke''': Every morning for you is a coffee morning.\\
'''Lorelai''': This is a jumbo coffee morning. I need coffee in an I.V.\\
'''Luke''': I can give you tea and a balance bar.\\
'''Lorelai''': Please, please, please, tell me you're kidding!\\
'''Luke''': I'm kidding. ''[goes to get the coffee]''\\
'''Lorelai''': You're sick!\\
'''Luke''': Yup.\\
'''Lorelai''': You're a sadist, you're a fiend! ''[Luke comes out with the pot of coffee]'' You're pretty!

->'''Lane''': ''[referring to coffee given to Lorelai at the diner]'' I made it extra strong. It should blacken your teeth and rot your stomach.\\

->'''Luke''': Want some coffee?\\
'''Lorelai''': I'm beyond coffee.\\
'''Luke''': Beyond coffee. This is big.

->'''Commander Benjamin Sisko''': Something wrong?
->'''Major Kira Nerys''': No, nothing.
->'''Sisko''': If something's bothering you, Major, I want to hear it.
->'''Kira''': It's just that every morning for the last year, I've seen you walk in here and start your day with a raktajino.[[note]]A Klingon type of {{Uncoffee}}.[[/note]]
->'''Sisko''': I love raktajino.
->'''Kira''': I know. You never even talk to anyone until you've had your first cup.
->'''Sisko''': I'm not awake until I've had my first cup.

->''"Ei! wie schmeckt der Coffee süße,\\

Ach, so schenkt mir Coffee ein!"''\\

[-["Mm! how sweet the coffee tastes,\\

Ah, then pour me out some coffee!"]-]

->''"I done my chores according to God's schedule\\
With coffee holding the wheel and nicotine working the pedals!"''

->''Blacker than moonless night\\

That is coffee.''

->'''The fuel of the Empire'''
->''It is a well-understood fact of tea science that anything brewed in a professional setting will invariably turn out bitter, burnt, and d__nably weak. It is also widely known to psychology that, subjectively, nothing tastes better.''

->'''[[Franchise/AceAttorney Phoenix Wright]]''': Coffee... need coffee...\\
'''[[WesternAnimation/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagic Twilight Sparkle]]''': I told you Phoenix, we didn't have any...

->'''Ship's Computer''': Dyou want a bevrige? [sic]
->'''Eagrus''': Coffee! I need it!

->''The Navy could probably win a war without coffee but it wouldn't like to try.''

->''It is by coffee alone [[BeamMeUpScotty I set my mind in motion.]] It is by the beans of Java that my thoughts acquire speed, that my hands acquire shaking, the shaking becomes a warning. It is by coffee alone I set my mind in motion.''

-->-- '''Jace Beleren''', ''TabletopGame/MagicTheGathering'', ''[[http://magic.wizards.com/en/articles/archive/uncharted-realms/catching-2015-07-22 Catching Up]]''

'''Tappi:''' I'M GREAT! I AM GREAT. EVER SINCE THAT [[PlotCoupon COFFEE DRIPPER THING]] WAS INSTALLED BY THE FOUNTAIN I [[PunctuatedForEmphasis LITERALLY. CAN NOT. STOP. MOVING.]] I NO LONGER FEAR THE CRASH. I WILL COMPLETE THE JOB.\\

->''"I don't have a fucking caffeine problem; you know what my problem is, there's not a fresh fucking pot!"''

->''Shirogane suffered from chronic sleep deprivation! If he did not refuel his caffeine reserves every three hours, he would collapse as if he had run out of battery. [[UpToEleven An extreme case of caffeine addiction]]!!''

-->-- '''Jim's Big Ego''', "Stress"

I like the kind of cup of coffee you get with your donuts\\
But I never get the donut I just have the cup of coffee\\
And when I get to work I have a cup of coffee\\
'Cause I like a coffee when I'm talking on the phone\\

And its lunch and I have an espresso~''

->''Professor Ozpin strolled leisurely through the cafeteria, a certain cheerful bounce to his step and a cup of steaming fresh coffee clutched contentedly in his hand. Coffee was of extreme importance to the professor, and today he had achieved the absolute perfect ratio of liquids to sugar. It was always a good day when good coffee was involved. Like a king admiring his lands, he proudly surveyed the student body, sitting in their respective groups and cliques. There was something special about this particular year of students, he thought. He couldn't put his finger on it, but they just all seemed [[CastOfSnowflakes predominantly exceptional, especially the new freshmen]].''
->[various shenanigans later]
->''The cafeteria filled with the shrieks of students as they frantically scrambled to avoid being drenched in the sprinklers' torrential downpour. Ozpin stood like a statue in the center of the room, amidst the chaos. His water-laden hair drooped over his face and concealed his expression. Ever so slowly, he tilted the cup to his lips and took an experimental sip. Somehow retaining his composure as he became more and more soaked, the professor walked slowly over to a table and set his coffee cup lightly on it. He then turned, sauntered over to the nearest trash bin and spat out the sip of coffee that he had kept in his mouth. Watered down coffee was disgusting, and the sugar ratio had been ruined by the extra liquid. He thought to himself that maybe he was wrong; this year's students were nothing special. In fact they were horrible and there should be a school-wide increase in the homework load for all of them.''

->It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion,\\
It is by the beans of Java that thoughts acquire speed,\\
The hands acquire shaking, the shaking becomes a warning,\\
It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.
->''The Jo Must Flow...''
-->-- Popular Usenet Sig

->"Anyone standing between [[Series/StarTrekVoyager Janeway]] and a cup of Folger's is toying with forces that would make [[Creator/HPLovecraft Lovecraft]] whimper."

'''Brenden Aaronson:''' ''[visibly wide eyed and twitching]'' The energy drinks! ''[a Red Bull can is thrown right into his hand, he then drinks from it and smashes it into his forehead]'' Gah! Aw yeeeeeeeah!

-->--''WebAnimation/{{{The Champions|2018}}''

-->--''WebAnimation/TheChampions2018''

-->-- '''VideoGame/{{Shantae}}: Half-Genie Hero'''

->''"Ice Bear. [[PunctuatedForEmphasis Needs.]] [[AxCrazy More.]] '''[[VoiceOfTheLegion COFFEE.]]'''"''

'''Roger:''' *slrrrrrrrrrp*\\

->[[MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagic Spike]] plopped the book onto the counter. “Anything else, Twilight?”

-->-- ''Series/{{Gilmore Girls}}'', episode two

-->-- ''Series/{{Gilmore Girls}}'', season 5 episode 2

-->-- ''Series/{{Gilmore Girls}}'', season 6 episode 6

->'''Commander Benjamin Sisko''': "Something wrong?"
->'''Major Kira Nerys''': "No, nothing."
->'''Sisko''': "If something's bothering you, Major, I want to hear it."
->'''Kira''': "It's just that every morning for the last year, I've seen you walk in here and start your day with a raktajino."[[note]]A Klingon type of {{Uncoffee}}.[[/note]]
->'''Sisko''': "I love raktajino."
->'''Kira''': "I know. You never even talk to anyone until you've had your first cup."
->'''Sisko''': "I'm not awake until I've had my first cup."

-->-- '''WebSite/SFDebris''', "[=Q2=]"

->'''Warren Danton:''' ''(at a very fancy party)'' Grace! Gracie P! Are you having any fun?\\
'''Grace Poole:''' ''(on edge and high-strung)'' Yes, Warren, thank you. [...] Actually, Warren, I really don't think this is...\\
'''Warren Danton:''' You know what, Gracie? I don't think you are enjoying yourself properly. What are you drinking? ''(takes her cup and sniffs it)'' This is COFFEE!

->'''Ship's Computer''': "Dyou want a bevrige?" [sic]
->'''Eagrus''': "Coffee! I need it!"

'''Fry:''' 'COURSE I'VE BEEN UP ALL NIGHT! Not because of caffeine, it was insomnia. I couldn't stop thinking about coffee. I need a nap. ''(promptly falls asleep, snores twice, then wakes up again)'' COFFEE TIME!

-->-- MemeticMutation of the Mentat Mantra from ''Film/{{Dune}}''

-->--''[[https://m.fanfiction.net/s/10284289/1/ Across the Years]]'', a ''Series/{{Victorious}}'' fanfic, [[https://m.fanfiction.net/s/10284289/12/ Chapter 12]]