What a surprise. It’s been 18 years since Spongebob premiered on Nickelodeon and since he is now the network's mascot (just as Mickey Mouse is to Disney and Bugs Bunny is to Warner Brothers), its still on. Now, before I go on and on about this, what I'm saying is that I'm not saying that I hate or dislike Spongebob. Years ago, when I was a pre-teen, I used to love and like Spongebob since it premiered in 1999, but then I grew out of it and moved on. I mean I liked the show, mostly the earlier ones, I remember watching them often when I was a kid and enjoyed it, but as the series went on with Nickelodeon demanding for more (show creator, Stephen Hillenberg wanted to end the series with the movie that premiered in 2004), I apparently lost interest and the show has gone downhill starting in the mid 2000's (the episode Good Neighbors was said to be when the series jumped the shark), resulting in some mediocre and atrocious episodes.
So what is the worst episode of Spongebob? Well, I can't decide! People say it’s “Pet Sitter Pat”, “The Splinter”, “One Coarse Meal”, “Stuck in the Wringer”, “Little Yellow Book”, and “Spongebob You're Fired!” But for me, I choose this one. Presenting…
“A Pal for Gary”
God, the Nightmare Fuel Machine is at increasing high levels right now. Why does Gary have to be abused? He didn’t even do anything wrong in the series to deserve abuse, and he sure as heck didn’t deserve it here! Usually, when the writers don’t feel like torturing Squidward, they tend to torment another character. Sometimes it may not be as bad, but other times it can be worse. In this case, it’s WORSE. Yeah, this episode is considered by many Spongebob fans to be the crowning achievement of failure, and there's a good reason why it did.
The episode begins with Spongebob leaving for work, thinking about how lonely his snail, Gary, must be when he’s not around. Though, in reality, Gary is having a good time, watching good ol’ western movies while eating chips and drinking soda! So, to make sure that Gary is NOT lonely, Spongebob decides to get another pet, a new friend. On his way home from work, he bumps into a gypsy, who happens to be selling these multi-colored, ridiculously cute puff-ball critters called nudibranches. Spongebob thinks that one of these critters will be perfect as a… pal for Gary, but the lady lets him off with a warning: these creatures are incredibly unstable and violent around other pets. But instead of going to a NORMAL pet store, Spongebob simply takes one of these creatures and leaves. I’m not kidding, he just takes the one he wants, without paying, and leaves. He better have hoped that that thing was free.
Once Spongebob gets home, he introduces Gary to the nudibranch, whom he named “Puffy Fluffy”. Beware folks, what’s about to happen is beyond your wildest nightmares! Whenever Spongebob isn’t in the room, Puffy Fluffy starts terrorizing Gary, trying to eat him! And whenever Gary tries to go to Spongebob for help, Spongebob immediately blames GARY for the trouble! In fact, in one scene, Spongebob is eating his dinner IN FRONT OF Gary and Puffy Fluffy, and when Gary tries to offer a chew toy, Puffy snatches it out of Gary’s mouth and RIPS THE TOY TO SHREDS RIGHT IN FRONT OF SPONGEBOB!! HOW CAN HE NOT SEE THAT?? Oh… But it only gets worse! This goes on until Gary wakes up in the middle of the night and goes into the kitchen, only to find that Puffy Fluffy has evolved into a horrific giant eel-like monster with a huge tailfin, a large dorsal fin on his back, sharp claws on his newly grown arms, rows and rows of jagged teeth, and even mouth tentacles (with teeth) for a tongue! Think that’s an exaggeration? Well, LOOK AT THIS!!!
I like the terrifying and dark design for the monster, but isn’t that a little… oh, I don’t know… EXTREME?? Especially for a show like SPONGEBOB? SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS?!?! This is more or less of a nitpick, since I actually like the creepy design of Puffy Fluffy, but I still find that a little bit extreme for a show like this. I mean, LOOK AT IT! That looks like the kind of thing you’d see in Resident Evil! And also, poor Gary has to defend himself against this nightmare leviathan! At this point, I feel pretty sorry for Gary. Gary, a little snail, has to fight for his life against a predator that’s almost as big as a bedroom, all because Spongebob was too stupid to notice what was really happening. Oh, but it only gets worse!
The battle drives on until Spongebob wakes up in the morning, after dreaming about Grammyma’s chili ALL THE WAY THROUGH THE CRASHES AND ROARS CAUSED BY PUFFY FLUFFY WHO’S TRYING TO KILL GARY!! He goes into the kitchen, only to find that Gary is in the jaws of this leviathan, about to be devoured. So, does Spongebob run away? Does he apologize for not listening to him earlier? Does he use his karate to attack Puffy? Does he try to save Gary ANY WAY? The answer: none of these things. Instead, he actually gets mad at GARY and tells him to PUT THE ACCUSED DEMON ANIMAL DOWN. I’m dead serious! He’s so darn stupid that he can’t see that a monster is trying to EAT GARY! I mean, how can you not see that?? Your own pet is about to die right in front of you and you SCOLD YOUR PET?? WHY?!?! WHAT DID HE EVER DO TO YOU?!?!?! Because Puffy Fluffy thinks Spongebob is scolding HIM, the monster tries to eat Spongebob now. And remembering what he learned during his Western hobby earlier in the episode, Gary manages to save Spongebob, lasso the beast and drive it away in a rather awesome manner! But here’s the worst part; the ENDING! Instead of apologizing to Gary or thanking him for saving his life, Spongebob actually BLAMES GARY FOR EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENED, and he actually decides to take him everywhere he goes, thus depriving Gary of the wonderful joy he rightfully deserves!
You know, I REALLY hated Spongebob in this episode! He would not listen to poor Gary, and when he saw that NIGHTMARE, ready to devour Gary, Spongebob turned into an oblivious jerk and yelled at Gary! WHAT THE HECK DID GARY EVER DO TO YOU?? I mean, seriously! Gary is just a snail, which is basically the underwater version of a cat. He may be an intelligent and rather sassy snail, but he’s still just a snail (mostly the equivalent of animals like housepets), and it’s extremely painful to watch him get tortured for ELEVEN MINUTES! (or tortured at all, for that matter) The fact that Spongebob never listens to Gary and is oblivious to the obvious danger is appalling. My jaw literally dropped when I heard Spongebob say “You put Puffy down right now!”. What the heck was that? HOW THE HECK CAN YOU NOT SEE THAT??? Also, the ending is a HUGE slap in the face to both Gary and the audience. The fact that Spongebob doesn’t even acknowledge the fact that Gary saved his life is just horrible. I mean, seriously! HOW THE HECK CAN YOU EVEN BE SO STUPID? NOT ONLY DO YOU SCOLD GARY, EVEN THOUGH YOU CAN SEE THE MONSTER RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU, YOU ALSO DEPRIVE POOR GARY OF HIS RIGHTFULLY EARNED HAPPINESS, WITHOUT ANY ACKNOWLEDGEMENT OF THE FACT THAT GARY ALMOST GOT KILLED SAVING YOUR LIFE, YOU BLOODY IMBECILE!!!
I can see why many people considered this to be one of the WORST episodes of the series, if not THE worst, and why it gets so many hate and included on their top 10 lists. Gary gets tormented and loses, Puffy-Fluffy wins and gets off Scott-free, Spongebob becomes a JERK to Gary and out-of-character, do I even have to complain and rant some more? We could shrink Bart down inside the tub and let him be eviscerated by the micro people that live there, but what about Puffy Fluffy? Well, that beast is going to have a hard time getting himself out of the mouth of the armored fish, Dunkleosteus terrelli. That'll totally rub Spongebob's face for being mean to Gary.
A Pal for Gary. A monster of a episode that has us chanting for the status quo to be restored at the end… all because it is a million dollars of crap that is maybe one of the best examples of Spongebob being a scumbag. It only gets worse from here, folks.
