The game begins with me picking a language. I opt not to choose Spanish or German, and not just because it's been forever since I've studied them.
I need to become reacquainted with other languages...
But it's okay, because Professor Kukui (I'm assuming this is a tree) is here to speak in the universal language of English while the music from the trailer plays in the background. Maybe turn down your radio the next time you have a Skype chat, buddy.
"Alola is a region made up of islands! Maybe that's why it has so many rare Pokemon!"
Hoenn was made of islands, too, Kukui, and I recall running into a ton of Zubats and Linoone. I'm going to need some solid evidence.
...Okay, that's a nice rock dog, but I'm going to need to see how soon it's available. (Note: It is not available anytime soon.)
Kukui then asks "Which photo should I use for your passport?" is a good way to get around the awkward and politically incorrect questions this quiz could raise.
Anyway, I choose to play as a tan female character named Luna, because she looks better than the male character.
After Kukui rubs his com'mons in my face some more, Luna leaves to help her mom pack some boxes so they can leave Kanto.
Meanwhile, at the Hall of Doom Totally Legit and Not At All Suspect Headquarters of the Completely Legitimately and 100% Reputable Organization, a bunch of shady looking characters in white chase around a young girl while wearing sinister smiles.
I'm sure there are two sides to this story.
But just as the girl is about to be cornered, some weird looking thing in her bag glows and turns her into a blue energy ball which flies away.
Time skip!
Three months later, Luna and her mom have moved to the Alola region. Luna's mom seems very happy to be under the sunlight, which makes me wonder if she's depressed about it always being night whenever she leaves the house in the alternate version.
Time zones are a bitch.
ANYWAY
A non-Alolan Meowth goes to wake up Luna, who has a bunch of Gen 1 merchandise in her room. After the Meowth meows, Luna... doesn't get up from bed.
Mainly because I forgot that the button pad isn't what I use for this game.
This adventure is off to a good start.
After investigating her room and discovering that Meowth has scratched up my toys (RUDE), Luna heads downstairs to talk to her mom, named Mom.
Must be a Biblical name, like Lot's Wife.
Mom asks if Luna is excited to meet some Alola Pokemon and, well, yeah. I gotta complete that Pokedex and these new guys are mocking me with their shameless roaming around outside of my PC box.
"I'm sure the Pokemon that live in a place like this must be friendly," Mom says as I think back to the demo with skepticism.
Anyway, the doorbell rings and Mom tells me to go let in Professor Kukui. But he decides to let himself before I can get there. And he's blasting more loud tropical music as well. RUDE
Kukui seems to be on a first name basis with Mom already, but keeps calling Luna cousin. Must be a Hawaiian thing. Mom mentions that Kukui battled against the Kanto Gym Leaders back in the day, making me wonder if he went up against Giovanni at some point. That'd be an interesting story...
After Kukui tells us that we're going to the next town to get a Pokemon and meet the Kahuna, Luna decides to respond in a Solid Snake-esque manner. Given that I already know I'm getting a Pokemon and what Pokemon are and blah blah blah, she opts to ask about the Kahuna.
"The Kahunas are crazy strong trainers! They're unbeatable for folks like me and you!"
...Somehow I doubt that.
Anyway, Mom says to go get our bag from our room. We also have to have a hat, because it's probably Entry #1 in Adventuring Rules.
At least we can take it off this Generation. Sheesh.
Anyway, after putting on her hat, the camera pans out to show Luna's full outfit, making me realize that she's showing way more leg than an 11-year-old probably should.
In the kitchen, Kukui and Mom are laughing at Meowth, the Pokemon presumably having told a particularly funny naughty limerick. Mom says she's going to clean since Pokemon mothers just seem to be exclusively housekeepers. Kukui compliments Luna's hat, and Meowth says something I probably can't post on a Christian website.
This is a children's game, Meowth. Clean it up.
Anyway, now it's time to head to Iki Town and get our Starter.
In the next entry, of course.
