First off, that title. Yeah it really is a good title for this given what goes on in the chapter, but really 'horse' not 'pony'? For shame!
Our opening quote this time is
Okay, I see how it applies to this chapter, but really, I have no real clue what to say about that, sorry.
We get back to the story with Rose saying how odd the rest of the day felt. Just going back to class and sitting a few rows from Diamond Tiara. Having the urge to avoid looking at her, avoid noticing her, while at the same time not appear as if she's trying to avoid her. Muddying through the day until it was time for art, grateful for the excuse to focus all her attention on her desk.
Each pencil stroke scraped away the falsehood that was the blank page, and revealed something true underneath. Something I absolutely, positively, totally needed to see.
Wow.. just wow... I'd like to say I'm speechless, but kind of can't get away without talking about this. First, it is just so amazingly, beautifully done. By now everyone has heard about how a sculptor doesn't set out to make a piece of stone become a predetermined shape, but rather sees the shape inside the stone, and brings it out, removes everything else. Something I do understand the idea of, if fail way to much at any kind of art to ever really have experienced. Can't recall ever hearing this applied to a blank piece of paper, but it really does work well. Even more so with her not knowing what she's doing.
Though, one thing does kind of bug me, and it's really really minor, but still just a little thing that makes it feel odd. Her using her hoof, and the story making a point about her using her hoof, when we've never seen anypony using hooves like that. Any writing is either using their mouth, or magic in the case of unicorns, never hooves. Like I said really minor nitpick, but still something that does cause me a bit of trouble, just a tiny little interrupt to the otherwise so so beautiful work here.
And back to the whole 'feels like it really is written by a foal' thing. You know, just looking at the words, yeah it does stretch things again, but in this case, it is so damn well done, I just don't care. And that last sentence does help to bring it back to feeling that way. Really anymore the biggest issue I have would have to be simply the size of her vocabulary. And, well, it is getting much better at the feel, but.. meh I'll get into it more later. But this, this was just so well done.
By the time she's done, she finds out she's made a picture of a hole in a wall, and looking through that hole is the face of a non-unicorn filly. The still rather poetic descriptions of the artwork getting to the point of her being sad, lonely, crushed, just everything bad that could be expressed for somepony to feel. And in a flash of insight Rose Petal realizes that this is the pony she was meant to save in the Wastes.
Well, more proof that she has some kind of subconscious connection to the Wastes, some force that is in some way guiding her. And I do like that while there, it's kept vague. She knows this is the pony she's meant to save, has some hint what she looks like, but not consciously. She was responding to something deep deep down in her mind when she drew this. Only recognizing things after the fact. So she knows the bare minimum she might need to. Have some sense of who the pony she's looking for is. Not enough to really describe her, or know where to search, but simply enough to recognize her when she see her. Plus the whole knowing the time thing. (Though sudden question, the 190 years, was that since the war, or 190 years from Rose's present?) So yeah her having some ideas, some subconscious knowledge is great and works, I just hope it doesn't end up being more then we've already seen. That she knows all sots of things easily. Some hints are fine, but just knowing everything would kind of suck.
But yes, once more this whole scene was just so well done.
She's broken out of her consideration of her project by Cheerilee, asking her if the filly in the picture has a name. Making Rose look up and realize she'd been so caught up in her drawing that she hadn't even noticed school was out, all the other foals having left already. Rose tries to deflect the questions, not wanting to explain what was going on with the picture, but Cheerilee pressing her. Not in a hard way either, but simply curious and trying to encourage her, clearly impressed with the art she's done.
Oh, no! Oh, no! Oh, no! The schoolyard gossip had reached her. She knew about what had happened between me and Diamond Tiara.
You know for a moment I actually thought this might be the case. but then I remember this is Cheerilee, who can't notice a pony being tormented by another one when it's happening right in front of her face pretty much.
Also this happened right after. Though, given something later.. maybe.. just maybe...
Anyway Rose was getting more and more on edge having to think, and worse talk, about the picture and what it really means. Then Cheerilee asks if she could hang the picture on the wall for an upcoming open house to show off the students projects.
I can’t believe I just blurted that out. Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!
Yeah I'd say she's 'on edge' right now, but that would require an 'edge' measured in molecules. Yeah snapping something like that should be a red flag for something going wrong to any adult, especially one that deals with foals so much.
Oh wait, this is Cheerilee, never-mind.
Well, so much for that. And, I think I get what she's going with and meaning about the whole 'art is crazy' thing. But, not enough to really talk about it. My knowledge when it comes to art stuff is beyond basic so, really not qualified to even try bullshitting something out of that. But Rose is now out of her seat, backed to a wall and looking around panicky for an escape route, and.. Cheerilee is acting like nothing is wrong. Though it does calm her down a bit.
She shut her eyes and nodded with a smile.
“And that my art is good…because it’s also crazy?”
She nodded again.
“And you want to hang this weird…thing.” I gestured down at my scribbles. “Up on the wall, so that everypony can come by and look and see how good and how crazy it is?”
She squeezed her eyes shut and nodded again with another, bigger, wider smile. I was beginning to think that I wasn’t the only one in a room playing with only half a deck.
I sighed. There’s no sense trying to make sense out of grown-ups sometimes.
“Sure.” I said.
Yeah I laughed at that. Again love the way the story can just add these little touches of humor into the more intense or stressful bits, give a little levity, and make it fit so well. Mostly by leveraging Rose being a foal. While I may point out the narration being not quite feeling like a foal wrote it, Rose Petal herself DOES feel very VERY much like a really well down little kid character. Albeit one that is rather mature and perceptive for her age, but not to unbelievable extents just far end of the Bell Curve ones.
Though to be fair to Cheerilee here at least, or at least counter to what Rose is thinking not my comments, the whole 'crazy' thing really doesn't apply to anypony else looking at it. They see what must be a fairly well done drawing. And with the description given, there's really nothing 'crazy' about it, other then where the inspiration for it came from and what it represents to her. Things nopony would know unless you told them. To them it would only be a really well done picture of a filly looking through a crack in a wall. (Though if they are into the whole 'true art' stuff, they'll likely find whole essays of bullshit they could come up with about the 'true secret message' of the picture.)
Cheerilee keeps up the questioning until Rose Petal finally just asks if she can go.
ZIP! I was halfway out the door when she called my name out one last time.
“One more thing.”
I spun silently on my hooves and faced her. At least I meant to spin. I ended up whacking one of my knees into the doorframe instead, and stumbling all over the room to regain my balance.
After the mutual reassurances occurred, (-“Yes, I’m fine, Miss Cheerilee. Jeez!” -“No, Rose Petal, don’t worry about the broken globe”), she asked me what she’d meant to ask me all along. The thing that had made her giggle at me all awkward-like a few moments before. Grown-ups always do that. They wait to tell you what’s really on their minds dead last.
-*Facepalm*- smooth Rose, real smooth. Again, nice little bit of humor, and more proving that she took AGI as her dump stat. But anyway, the important bit Cheerilee really wanted to ask her...
I LOVE things like this. Things that, you go through a whole scene thinking one thing about a character. In this case "Damn Cheerilee is bucking useless and oblivious." And then, afterwards, just one little line changes all of it. Makes you go back and see that no, what appeared to be going on, really wasn't. Makes your entire view change, and all with just some tiny, simple bit of new information. Cheerilee DID know something was wrong, did see that something wasn't right. She wasn't being completely oblivious, but actually being really damn clever.
Now not sure if this was intentional or not, but kind of hope it was. All of Cheerilee's questions, all her pushing, while seemingly ignoring how stressed and scared Rose was. How off she was. It was for a reason. She DOES spend a lot of time dealing with foals, and has for awhile, she has to know something about how they act, and more importantly react. If she confronted Rose directly, asked her what was wrong, tried to get her to come right out and say it, Rose would clamp down, shut off, just evade the question or refuse to answer. Confronting her directly would just make things worse and not give any answers. But seemingly being unaware of there being a problem. Not trying to get the answers directly. It keeps Rose off guard, makes her more willing to answer, because it's not directly asking something she doesn't want to say, but working around the edges. Using the picture was a really great way to do it. It's clear something about the picture is related to something that is making Rose uneasy, so instead of asking about what the core cause is and risking Rose shutting down, she asks about the picture. Trying to get some hints about what it might be that way. Approach it obliquely. And only at the end coming right out and making clear she knows something is going on, and offering to be there to help Rose, without prying any more and driving her away.
Again not sure if all of the was intended, but it is there nonetheless, and just DAMN! Just great, playing on the show supported expectations of Cheerilee being rather oblivious to foals issues. Making the reader play along and figure that's what's going on, only to pull the rug out from under us in one line. Granted it's not quite "I already did it thirty-five minutes ago" levels of WHOA! but still pretty good.
We cut to Rose walking home, doing some serious organization as she walks. Namely making a list of everypony she's worried so far today. While noting that it's pretty hard for a non-unicorn to write and walk at the same time. Doubly so when your as graceful as she is.
As she recovers from her latest failed dexterity check the colt she had helped in the playground trots up to talk to her, Rose trying to get him to go away, but politely.. for a foal anyway. But he persists, Rose getting a shock as she realizes she's starting to think like a grownup, starting to say she's busy, she has things that are important to do. Just another little shock to add to a full day of Whiskey Tango Foxtrot. Eventually, she cracks, unable to keep all the stress all the worry, all the fear inside. When the colt asks her if she's okay, she cracks, unable to keep up the facade and admits, no, no she isn't.
She spills everything, breaking down in tears by the end, what she saw, what she knows, how she knows she has to stop the war. (Still not sold on how shes knows about the war in the first place.) And after all of it, shocked that the colt wasn't running away, or calling her nuts, but rather still there, still listening, and seemingly believing her. Though is inability to offer any advice or help beyond a shrug irritates her till she snaps at him, instantly regretting it and apologizing.
That done they go out for milkshakes, Rose to embarrassed to admit she didn't even know his name despite being in class together for months. And of course, as is the case it ends up popping into her head randomly after she stops thinking about it, causing her to spout it out in a massive non-sequitur. ( It was Cliff Diver.)
Cliff seems to be taking the whole seeing the future after the End thing pretty well. Asking if she could see what was going on with the colt right now, like she could earlier, but Rose trying it and being unable. More questions, well actually just more wanting an answer to the same question, "What are the rules for her traveling?" Cliff Diver asking what they were going to do, his use of 'we' drilling into her head. Making her wonder what was going on, why he was so eager to help with something so crazy
That’s what I thought friendship was my whole life.
Then this pegasus kid comes along at the worst possible moment. He’s got absolutely nothing to gain, and in fact, has everything to lose by putting himself out on a limb for a nut job like me, and still, he decides that he wants to help. What gives?!
Well, a really great little insight for her. We saw her and Blue together, and yeah it never did some off like they were particularly close. But, Rose realizing this, realizing how little her 'best friend' was really a friend. Again I am loving how great this story is with things like this, just tiny little observations like this, bringing up pretty deep things that have so much meaning, and yet not over dwelling on them.
Though honestly, I think the "It's what I thought Friendship was my whole life" bit might be a tad over doing it. Just her insights on how Blue treated her verses Cliff would do a good job of showing this fact, while being rather subtle. While stating it out right like that, still works but makes it a little to blatant possibly. Again not bad, but think it might have been better.
But yes Blue was, even before this, clearly a 'friend' of the loosest sense. Cliff Diver, just met her, at least in more then a "Oh yeah I've seen her around" type deal, but is already acting like a better, truer friend then any Rose has ever had. And it's little wonder Rose was so scared of opening up, so turned inward if she's never actually had anypony outside of her sister that she ever really felt comfortable with, felt that close a bond to. But now that she does have one, now that she's starting to see what true friendship is, going to be interesting to see how some of her perspectives change.
She felt a few pangs of guilt at dragging him into this mess, but realized he wouldn't leave, that he was committed to helping her, so instead just answered his question about what they were going to do. Stop the bucking war!
But I couldn’t. I had to be home in time for dinner.
Three things here. First, how the bucking hell does she know THAT much about the war? Before, it could be argued as just a vague idea, some feeling of there having been a war, or even just her being perceptive enough to figure there had to be a war to have the country become The Wastes. But, knowing not only for sure there was one, but exactly more or less when it would happen? That, stretches things way to far for me. Also, 20 years makes no sense along the timeline. General consensus is the war started ~ 10 years after the current time in the show, which is when this fic takes place. While I can't recall if this is thoroughly canon or not, it does make sense given the ages of the mane 6 throughout. The war itself is canon as having lasted ~ 20 years, with the Mane 6 taking control of The Ministries halfway through. So regardless of how she knows that number making little sense, the number itself is out of place.
Second, the image of her storming into the throne room and confronting the Princesses. So, so bucking priceless. And, really do want to see that, just, so damn great an image. Though, will be interesting how the story gets around her telling them, or having the Princesses know but not do anything to stop it. Really going to be interesting to see how it handles this.
And Three, the reason why she can't do it.. nope nothing about how a little filly storming into Canterlot Castle and yelling at the Princesses being just a tad out of line. Nope, she simply doesn't have time to do it and be home by dinner. Once more, really love the humor in the story, and it all fits so well with Rose feeling like a real foal. Though again while that's a good enough reason for her to hold her tongue now, why not later? How it deals with that is going to be something I'm eager to see.
But she also has another reason for not doing so, simply.. what COULD she do?
Again, this. While she is to an extent right, again she's oversimplifying things. While that is a problem, it was not in and of itself the sole cause of the war. But yes it wasn't one thing, wasn't one pony or zebra that could be stopped, one entity that cold be defeated and save the world. It's far far more complicated, and she doesn't even know the basics of HOW the war started, so how could she prevent it? All she knows is there will be a war, and that it will leave Equestria in ruins. Nothing that wold help prevent it. At least yet.
Cliff however has a plan, or at least a place to start looking for how to formulate a plan. The Library! Twilight Sparkle approves of this plan. Or at least she would if she was there, instead the two find the Library closed, Rose banging on the door yelling for somepony to let them in. The door swinging open in mid pound, causing Rose to fall through it.
But the Library she entered wasn't the one she was looking for, rather she ends up in the library as it exists in the wastes, ruined, destroyed, the decor replaced by things she refuses to even try describing. But among the defiled mess, there was one book left untouched, pristine. Rose heading over to grab it, but as her hoof touches it, everything falls away and she's back outside the closed Library door with Cliff Diver's hoof on her shoulder, trying to shake her awake.
Okay, so another really really odd jump. But, not likely a real one, this wasn't her going into the real Wastes, at least it didn't feel like it. Why would a book be left out an untouched like that? Where were the raiders that lived in it? Their prisoners in the cages, or their remains? While it was clearly the Library after the End, it's also up in the air if it was her actually going there, or just a vision of something like it. Some hint. Plus the whole book, and the vision ending as soon as Rose realized the book was there for her to find. Again more and more questions about what is going on. And we see she stayed in the real world, just kind of zoned out for a bit while this was happening. But is that how it happens when she does her trips at night? if so, why does she get injured? So many questions.
She tries to pass off her little zoning out as nothing, despite how suddenly ill she looks, and her vomiting from the revulsion at what she had just sen doesn't help her pull that off. But, he doesn't do anything except let her lean on him and be there for her. Making it sink in a bit deeper that he truly did want to be her friend, and a true one, not like Blue was. Also that she had trusted this pony who till a few hours ago was a total stranger with what was going on. It was time she did the same to her sister.
LOVED this. Was wondering just how long she's hide it, how oblivious Roseluck would be, her going alone. I really did not expect her to just outright decide to tell her about it on her own. Rather Roseluck finally having enough of seeing something odd and forcing it out of her. Or just never getting clued in. So love that she actually is trusting her sister and opening up. Second that more subtle affirmation of just how good a friend Cliff already is, something so new to Rose Petal. Though before moving on, Narrator Rose Petal gives us a bit of foreshadowing.
Huh, Roseluck's deepest secret too? Yeah the story knows how to make me interested and intrigued.
Before parting, she does stop to ask just why Cliff Diver was willing to believe her, why he was going along with a story so insane, why he was so eager to help. And the response anyone should see coming. "Because you're my friend." What more reason does he need? Though Rose still has trouble grasping the concept. As well as with feeling guilty over spreading her burden around, for having some other pony get dragged into her insanity. And yet, a part of her was quite grateful for him. Thought he was even more insane and nuts then she thought herself to be, but in a good way.
She spends the hours after in her room, psyching herself up to tell Roseluck until called to dinner. Immediately stopping and wondering what was going on since there was no food on the table, rather it was set up near the fireplace, and it was sandwiches, something she never has for dinner. (Okay so she loves sandwiches but, that's really really vague for a favorite food. I mean if it was a certain TYPE of sandwich it would make more sense, but just 'sandwiches' no matter what's in them? What?)
Roseluck says it's because of her special day, getting her cutie mark and all. We also get a bit more about their family indirectly. Since Rose mentions there were two chairs in the living room, but she always sat on the floor, because the other one was mom's chair, and she just didn't feel right using it. While Roseluck used dad's chair, since nopony gave a buck about him according to her. So... both parents are gone, it IS Roseluck caring for Rose Petal on her own, and they were close to their mother and miss her, but not close to their father, who we know appears to have left them. So, more questions answered and more asked.
But turns out Roseluck did have more on her mind then just giving her a nice meal on her Cutie mark day, asking if she ever told Rose Petal the story about how she got her own Cutie mark. (And given what the story is, she should know full well she hadn't, but makes a good opening to get to the point.)
Namely, that she had gotten her Cutie Mark in her dreams. Just like she figures Rose Petal did.
And did not see this even coming at all. This had happened to Roseluck too!? And she did realize something was really off, but wasn't acting concerned about it, because she already had an idea what it was. Letting Rose Petal deal with things on her own first, get used to the idea. Again I LOVE things like this, making you go back and look at past interactions in a whole new light. So yeah, also loving how the adults really aren't useless here, how they are far smarter and more aware then Rose Petal thinks.
Roseluck goes right into telling the story. How she fell asleep, and then felt like she was really falling. Ending up in Canterlot 600 years ago. Rose Petal rejoicing in a sign she wasn't crazy, telling Roseluck she got hers hundreds of years into the future, but when asked about it tells Roseluck to tell her's first.
Well it seems the whole knowing how long it's been thing is a part of just whatever it is that causes this, since Roseluck admits she has no idea how she knew when she was, it just popped in her head.
She wandered around town till she heard a pony crying. She climbed up to his window to take a look, somehow knowing that was why she was there, to meet that pony. Much like Rose Petal's own feelings. She ended up befriending the old stallion that she found, spending quite some time getting to know him, talking to him, mostly about his work, painting. The stallion rejoicing in her showing up, saying the day they met he had been close to giving up, sure nopony cared about him, that he didn't matter, and her showing up where and when she did proved him wrong. That it was fate, that it meant something not only was out there, but it cared about him, as well as simply giving him a friend. Then breaking out his painting gear and telling her to hold that expression, and especially to hold that smile him saying that had given her.
After that Roseluck woke up with her Cutie mark, but little clue what it really meant, until years later during a class trip to a museum where she saw a collection of art from the great Leonardo da Whinny, including a very very familiar looking smile on the face of the Pona Lisa.
WOW! So, this isn't some isolated thing unique to Rose Petal, but something that also effected Roseluck. Is it just them? Was it something their mother and/or father went through too? Does this have something to do with why they lost their mother and/or why their father left them? Did their father happen to have an hourglass cutie mark? Again answering some questions but raising others. But now we, and Rose Petal, know she is not crazy, that this is really happening and that she really is traveling in time, really affecting things. Though seems to be with the required Stable Time-Loop that Equestrian Time Travel goes with. Which given that, yeah means she can't alter what is going to happen. Though really want to see why she can't, what prevents her from stopping the War or changing anything.
Now, one other bit Roseluck talked about that does kind of confuse me due to how things were presented. She tells Rose Petal that time is variable between the sides. That you can spend months on the other side, or just a few hours. It all takes just one night on the 'present'. Now this is fine, but the way she tells her story about meeting Da Whinny makes it sound like she did that all in one night. So how would she know it could vary unless that wasn't the only time she did it, that after helping him, she went to some other time later. Helped some other pony. If so, why did she stop? Or did she really take several trips to see him? It's possible, but again, the way she words things makes it come off to me like this was all one long trip.
Next is the issue of why it's only her smile that could be seen on the Pona Lisa, not her face. Why the mare in the painting doesn't look like her aside from the expression. Are they not going back with their real bodies? Well that much is clear since their body still stays in the 'real' world. But that just leads to more questions about how injuries can come back with them. Are they doing some weird Quantum Leap type deal? Taking some other ponies place? That... would actually explain a good deal of it given what we know right now. Rose and the pony in the past/future switch places, body as well to explain the injuries. And some lingering imprint of that pony makes them look like the original to everypony else. The target pony kept unconscious the whole time by whatever is doing the switching.
That's one plausible explanation, though could they just have a body pop into existence for them? Again so many questions about how this works, though starting to get some answers at least.
After her sister's story, Rose petal is rather outraged and upset. Not over what's happening, or even anything about herself. But rather upset that her sister did something so important, was responsible for such a huge thing, reshaping how ponies saw art. And yet nopony knows about it. She doesn't get any credit. Roseluck being fine with it, saying she didn't do anything more then warm and old ponies heart, that it was Da Whinny's genius that did all that, she just gave him a little push.
She held out her other hoof, and made a gesture mimicking a scale.
“Equestria needs all the greatness it can get sometimes, and can’t really be bothered dishing out credit everywhere that it’s deserved.”
...
“Look, everypony wants to be a rock star, or a fashion designer, or the next big important leader who comes along and changes history, and gets parades thrown in her honor, but it just doesn’t work like that. Nine hundred ninety-nine times out of a thousand, what the world really needs more than anything is a good background pony.”
I must have been visibly pouting, because Roseluck snapped at me.
“Hay! Being a background pony is nothing to be ashamed of. We make history happen.”
Damn, just damn. Every time I think this story has already opened up enough things to explore. It comes along and adds yet another amazing little twist. Some new bit of insight. First off, yes the usage of 'background pony'. Very very well done way to explore the point. So let's get that obvious bit out of the way. This being said by a background pony, and just how obsessed the fandom can be with them, how much attention they get despite never really doing much. Yeah that's all pretty obvious with the choice of wording.
But this is more then just about what most mean by 'background pony'. Yeah there is that connotation, and it works quite well. But you also have what Roseluck means by it. A pony that does the work behind the scenes. All the ponies that help out in ways nopony notices. The ponies that set up the stage for a concert, make sure everything is in place and ready to go. The expert instrument repair pony that keeps the famous musicians cello perfectly tuned and sounding it's best. The hardworking assistants who organize the Princesses paperwork, deal with the minor things for them. One little change at just the right time can have lasting and far reaching effects. Something I already thought the story might be focusing on, how little changes can matter. So yeah, didn't really see this coming for certain, but it was something I thought was possible and am glad it is exploring.
The chapter ends with Roseluck talking about how she realized her Cutie mark meant beauty. She earned it for showing an old pony beauty and warming his heart with it. Rose Petal remarking how hers is all broken. Just fallen petals, not a full rose. Her sister comforting her that it's still beautiful, just a different kind of beauty, but even if that's not the case she promises to help Rose Petal figure it out. And the best place to start would be if Rose Petal was ready to tell her about what happened to her last night.
Thoughts-Well not much that I haven't already said. Yet another really really well done chapter. The story continues to prove to be incredibly insightful, raising questions and things to think about that are rather obvious, and yet not till you think about them. The nature of 'background ponies', art, the difference between a surface 'friendship' and a true friend. And all done quite well. Not belabored over, not worn into the ground, just brought up naturally though Rose's thoughts and experiences. Just, amazing. Last two chapter I really really loved one half, and was just "Good but not as good' for the other, this one was great from start to finish.
Plus getting more and more information about how this whole traveling thing works. Not enough to really know, but enough to know there is some reason some logic behind it. What, we don't know, but the steady learning keeps us certain eventually we'll find out the answers. And till hen it keeps just enough information flowing to keep us feeling like we are getting somewhere with it, that we are learning, while keeping enough questions unanswered to keep us invested, keep us interested in learning more.
The narration is doing a much better job and feeling natural, feeling more like a possible foal. At least as much as it really could. While still some noticeable spots, overall it is better. Or at least getting to be less jarring. And Rose herself is a really really great foal character. The narrator Rose, good but, yeah you can tell it's an adult trying to sound like a younger person. but still does a DAMN good job at making it feel like it's about a kid. If not by one.
All around a great well done chapter, didn't noticeably increase my feeling towards the story, but that's because they are already so damn high after last one and this keeps things going.
