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New Recruits Tend To Drown A Lot
Ranger Six

[table of contents]
Combat Report - March 31st, 2040
Personnel deployed to combat zone:

Yana (via remote link): This is one of their big fish, people. Exercise extreme caution - we don't know what kind of nasty surprises they have in store for us.

(WHIRR-CLUNK)

(CLUNK CLUNK CRUNCH)

Myst: Well, I know one right off the bat - we landed right next to it!

Princeps: Holy shit, we did at that!

Nesmith: And, hey, look at that - an Eek, ripe for the plucking!

(THUPP-CRACKLE)

Gill Man: HURGH . . .

(CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH)

(KSSHOW)

syd: Oh, HELL no bitch!

(THUPP-CRACKLE)

Gill Man: HURGH . . .

Nesmith: I'm going to head around towards the front of the vessel.

Yana: syd, Princeps, Myst, cover him.

(CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH)

(KSSHOW-CRACKLE)

(THUPP-CRACKLE THUPP-CRACKLE THUPP-CRACKLE)

Myst: FIRE IN THE HOLE!

(WHABOOM)

Nesmith: He's still standing!

Princeps: Not for long!

(THUPP-CRACKLE THUPP-CRACKLE)

Gill Man: HURGH . . .

Princeps: See?

(WHSS-THUD)

syd: GRENADE!

(WHUMPF)

Nesmith: Will you look at that, the Eeks blew a hole in their own damn sub. They really did us a favor!

Myst: Don't get cocky. There's one hiding just around the corner.

(WHSS-THUD WHSS-THUD)

(WHUMPF WHUMPF)

Tracy: . . . Did those Eeks just waste two grenades?

Nesmith: Yup. And I see both of the throwers.

Tracy: Good. Kill 'em.

Nesmith: With pleasure.

(THUPP-CRACKLE THUPP-CRACKLE)

Gill Man: HURGH . . .

Nesmith: One down.

Tracy: I can't get a bead on the other.

(KSSHOW-CRACKLE)

Nesmith: YAUGH!

(PSHHEW-THWUD)

Gill Man: HURGH . . .

Tracy: Take THAT, you bastard!

(CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH)

syd: There's one on the ridge overlooking the Triton. Wonder why he's staring off into the distance - has he been smoking something?

Princeps: Who cares? Kill him already.

(THUPP-CRACKLE)

(PSHHEW-TWHUD)

Gill Man: HURGH . . .

syd: Th'hell you do that for, Tracy? That Eek was mine!

Tracy: Hey, don't look at me. The gun went off by itself.

syd: Sure it did.

Yana: Will you two stop bickering? You're like an old married couple!

(CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH)

Myst: Contact. Taking the shot.

(THUPP-CRACKLE)

Gill Man: HURGH . . .

Myst: Eek is down. Oh, and I've found the main doors.

(CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH)

nos: Got another Eek outside the ship. Taking the shot.

(THUPP-CRACKLE THUPP-CRACKLE THUPP-CRACKLE)

nos: No dice. Tracy?

Tracy: On it.

(PSHHEW-THWUD)

Gill Man: HURGH . . .

Tracy: Got him.

(CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH)

Princeps: Whoa, shit, where'd he come from?

Harkness: Who cares? Let's kill him!

(THUPP-CRACKLE THUPP-CRACKLE THUPP-CRACKLE THUPP-CRACKLE)

Gill Man: HURGH . . .

Princeps: Sneaky git.

Harkness: Sneaky, DEAD git.

(CLUNK CLUNK CLUNK CRUNCH CRUNCH)

Harper: Hey, Tracy, you dropped your spare clips.

Tracy: Thanks, Owen. I hadn't even noticed they were missing.

(CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH)

(WHSS-THUD)

nos: GRENADE!

(WHUMPF)

nos: *blows a raspberry at the alien* GREEN EEKS CAN'T THROW!

(THUPP-CRACKLE)

Gill Man: HURGH . . .

(CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH)

(WHIRR-CLUNK)

(CLUNK CLUNK CLUNK)

Myst: I'm inside the ship. There's an Eek on the next level up.

Yana: Myst, do not engage. Wait for the rest of the team.

Myst: Copy that.

(PSSHOW-CRACKLE)

Tracy: Eek in the crater!

nos: I see him. FIRE IN THE HOLE!

(WHSS-THUD)

(WHABOOM)

Gill Man: HURGH . . .

nos: That got him, but good.

(CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH)

Yana: Myst, Princeps, Harkness, and nos - you're all in position by the main entrance, right?

Myst: Yessir, we are.

Yana: Okay, people, I want you to load fresh clips before you breach.

(CH-CHK! CH-CHK! CH-CHK! CH-CHK!)

Harkness: We're fully loaded, sir.

Yana: GO!

(WHIRR-CLUNK)

(CLUNK CLUNK CLUNK)

Harkness: CONTACT!

(THUPP-CRACKLE)

Gill Man: HURGH . . .

(CLUNK CLUNK CLUNK)

Princeps: Got a dead Eek in the engine room.

Myst: Negative for contact.

nos: Negative contact.

(PSHHOW-CRACKLE)

Harkness: Got a shooter up those stairs!

(THUPP-CRACKLE)

Gill Man: HURGH . . .

nos: Not anymore!

Yana: Looks like he was the last one. Good work, people. Now bring that thing home!
18th Dec '10 7:30:33 PM flag for mods
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