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The Great Nitpicky Live Blog of El Goonish Shive
Strips 821-840 (Beginning of the The Giant Clusterfuck of Plot Threads Arc)Strip 821
- This is generic.
- But ten times more interesting, somehow.
- Maybe because it's an actual goddamn fight.
- And alluded to relationships and dynamics.
- Then again, maybe it's because these guys haven't pissed me off yet.
- You know, maybe it's just the fact I've been reviewing idle chatter for a while now, but the fighting effects don't seem...that...bad for a beam o war.
- You know, I must know, why are they both white? Really? It's so...blah.
- Fun fact.
- Terra never shows up again :D
- Aw shit. Shive found the "leaves" gradient.
- So there you have it.
- This is Magus.
- The evil guy who wanted to ruin the party for gender lulz.
- Or something.
- Want to know what really sucks? This is the current plot line.
- This plot line is the one that's still going on.
- 6 years and no sign of stopping.
- No sign of resolution.
- And we still have yet to see Evil Tedd.
- So, what, is it just six (well, four, since the first two years was that lovely birthday plot you saw) years of nonstop Magus action?
- HAH! AHAHAHAH!
- You can tell it's a female detective, because of her hip-pose.
- But, you see, blog readers, it's not just Magus, who will be filling up these parts.
- There is another villain.
- Ain't she adorable?
- Actually, to be fair, she is one of Shive's better villains.
- See what I mean? Actual legit scary villainy-ness.
- So, the next four years will consist of their teaming up, right?
- Guess again.
- Will this be the plot? Bad jokes that make no sense for someone who has been exposed to all sorts of magic and uryuom stuff?
- Nope, not even Shive is that stupid.
- —takes deep breath—
- Sidemouthsidemouthsidemouth. Elliot still has no nipples. What kind of stupid sleep over would have one half a family go back home? LOL LESBIANS. LOL LESBIANS ARE HOT. LOL GIRLS CUDDLING TOGETHER IS LIKE THEY ARE LESBIANS. ELLEN STOP SITTING LIKE THAT IT'S BAD FOR YOUR HEALTH. ELLEN IS BEING A DOUCHE BECAUSE ELLIOT POINTED OUT THE LOGICAL INCONSISTENCIES IN HER RELATIONSHIP. Ellen and Nanase are all about the cuddles. A sparkling healthy relationship. LESBIANS. There is something very very wrong if Nanase looks like a male fairy. Ellen might end up breaking up with her. Why didn't Ellen know that Nanase was afraid of being gay? That's what all of this drama was about! You know, Elliot and Sarah never had this much relationship drama. The fact that there are no female nerds is completely fucking retarded. Shive improves this later on, adding plenty of white female nerds, but of course, that means that these strips make no more fucking sense. And oh look a strip that's not about Nanase and LOL MADE YOU LOOK! You know, Sarah must have really low self esteem to desire to be stalked by a bunch of nerds. Let me tell you, it's not something to enjoy. It's creepy. And don't forget LESBIANLESBIANLESBIANS! Also, don't blame Susan. Because no one should ever be blamed. Ever. Lesbians.
- Aw shit. Look at those fucking gradients.
- Fucking beautiful.
- Yes. Yes she is like a videogame.
- Because what's the point in having someone work hard at new spells, when you can just deus ex machina everything away?
- In a grave problem?
- MAGIC NEW SPELL TIME :D
- Yes, this does indeed happen.
- Why do you ask?
- As we all know, sneaking around spells are evil and should be punished.
- BLOODY SPY!
- And now for something completely fucking different
- Hah! Made you look! It's still about school drama! And Ellen!
- You know, the lesbian!
- Also, DON'T WE ALREADY KNOW THIS?
- You know, there is this rule in the How NOT to Write a Novel book.
- One of the things they mention is don't repeat discussions.
- And here is why.
- Does anyone else want to go back to Magus?
- Well, TOO BAD! BECAUSE WE HAVE ANOTHER VILLAIN TO GO THROUGH, AND ASSORTED SCHOOL TOMFOOLERY!
- ENJOY IT, DAMMIT!
- So, she has been teaching herself college level stuff.
- Good to know this is never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever brought up again.
- Plus, don't you need to start with the basics?
- College level math, for example, is Calculus. If you take ap classes, Calc 2. Also, Stats. These aren't things you can just teach yourself. Mostly because you need to know trig, algebra and EVERYTHING else before that to build you up. For Calc. Not for stats. Stats is just something different entirely.
- And then you have college level Physics.
- It requires Calculus.
- And that's just what I know. Bring in some college level people for other classes, and we'll see how easy it is to teach yourself at age 18, when you never ever ever ever went to school. Ever.
- And like I said, this is never brought up again.
- Making this an EXCELLENT case of
- Instead of:
And I don't count it for very obvious reasons.
- Tedd! A sexist prick!
- What was that? Learning about how it's ok to be a girly man?
- I guess I got that WAY wrong!
- What's really odd is we never see something like this again.
- Oh look, a floating form.
- Wanna know when it becomes relevant?
- Around here.
- And guess what?
- SHE DOES NOTHING!
- AWESOME FORM!
- RIGHT GUYS?
- Well, ok, it does show up before that.
- OK, these "light gray borders" for flashbacks?
- They ain't working.
- I thought there was some sort of time paradox here!
- Behold! Cuddling!
- I know what you're gonna say! Cuddling! That's all! That's good! It means Shive isn't giving into his base desire for hot lesbianness!
- Except he is.
- Take the commentary in this strip
I could have focused on a more risque moment with Ellen and Nanase in this and other comics, but I genuinely prefer showing more cuddly moments. I'm not entirely certain why, but I suspect it's because cuddly moments have less to do with simple lust and more to do with closeness and being together.
- Now, a normal non-nitpicky person would think, oh, that's sweet of him!
- But I, a super paranoid super nitpicky person sees things slightly differently!
- I mean, that's like praising a foot fetishist for only having people show their bare feet instead of their tits.
- It ain't gonna happen, bro.
- Because, in the end, it's still oh so lesbiany.
- Sure, if he had them clad in bikinis in the sketchbook, I'd have a field day, but just because he doesn't, doesn't mean I'm gonna up and go praise him for it. Good job Shive! You're not completely obsessive about your lesbians! Jolly good!
Sketchbook Strip 021607
Behold! Shive is douche!
Sketchbook Strip 021807
Behold! This joke makes no sense!
- Those speech bubbles in the first panel are horribly ordered.
- Whooh. Yay for Susan. But as we know, Susan is not allowed to be happy. Otherwise, we wouldn't be able to tell her apart from the others!
- Seriously. Susan. You need help. You need help now.
- This isn't funny.
- If you can't look the mirror without seeing the woman your father cheated on, you need fucking help.
- But no, this isn't that big of a problem!
- LET'S NEVER BRING IT UP AGAIN AFTER THIS!
- Also, why do we need to see this flashback? We've already seen it two times now.
- But hey, third time is the charm, right?
4th Aug 11
(edited by: LongNose)
4th Aug 11
4th Aug 11
5th Aug 11
Is that a good thing or a bad thing, Myrmidon?
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5th Aug 11
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