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1Older guesses for WMG.PoisonOakEpilepticTrees. Please do not add new entries to this article.
2----
3[[WMG:If you slept with Kelly in ''MassEffect 2'' . . .]]
4Your OldSaveBonus in ''3'' will include the alien STD Mordin mentioned as having spread onto the ship. Let's face it, she's [[AnythingThatMoves the character most likely]] to have had sex with [[ButYouScrewOneGoat varren]].
5
6[[WMG: Silver the Hedgehog is Satan]]
7And Blaze is Jesus.
8
9[[WMG: Justin Bieber is the entire universe's greatest singer, ever.]]
10Seriously, can you prove it wrong?
11* Baby, baby, baby, baby [[BigNo NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO]]
12* Perhaps a different way to look at it, Japan conspired with Canada to gender-change a small girl, inject her with [[AppliedPhlebotinum dangerous voice altering substance]], and infect America and other countries in hope of spreading this substance to the entire world!....[[CloudCuckooLander too much?]]
13[[WMG: Jews, who control the media, are responsible for the popularity of Justin Bieber]]
14Hate to be Encyclopedia Dramatica, but since this is PoisonOakEpilepticTrees, Sure Why Not. The Jewish corporate agenda is not the control of Israel or Zion, it's to control our media and fiction. They had the chance to fix everything, but instead it led to America's cultural downfall. The DarkMessiah, AdolfHitler, foresaw this, and prophesied that this relentless perversion would lead to the devaluation of beauty and the rise of {{Mega Corp}}oratism, said Mega Corps vanquishing the classics and preferring whatever is the most catchy and upbeat. And Justin Bieber is the horrifying consequence of this media corporatism......
15
16[[WMG: Twilight is the most accurate and realistic description of vampires.]]
17Vampires, being the superior species, tried to be overlords to humanity, but instead of obeying them in a Big Brother fashion humanity just laughed at them. The Vampires got mad, and so they spent their life hiding amongst us, creating the mythology and image and genre of Dracula and the "sexy devilish vampires in gothic settings", since we are more likely to fall, worship and obey HornyDevils than ridiculous [[strike:fairies]] sparklepires. The conditioning affected us so much that when it's the time to show their real image we fell for them. Oh, and the Vampires also control the Illuminati, and the Jews, which in turn control the media, which in turn controls Justin Bieber. There exists a group of [[BuffyTheVampireSlayer vampire]] [[AvatarAndTheAirbendingFellowshipOfVampireSlayers slayers]], but all they can do is to stave off the conditioning. Of course, the [[KnightTemplar Knights Templar]] called Christianity fell for the joke.
18
19[[WMG: Uwe Boll is the entire universe's greatest director, ever.]]
20Can you also prove it wrong?
21* You may not be too far off. Postal has gotten a few good reviews for it's sheer OOT factor, and Rampage is said to be a pretty striking look at violence (in fact a few of his more recent films have been said to be this). Methinks Uwe may be more clever than he lets on, like the filmmaking version of [[{{Watchmen}} The Comedian]], filling his films with CrossesTheLineTwice material to show humanity a parody of itself.
22* He is the best director ever, and he's doing his shitty movies '''on purpose''': this is not ForTheEvulz: he is creating the material from which the next ecological totalitarian World Government will built its propaganda: "consumerist society was bad: look the kind of shit they used to watch!".
23** Or their his best movies.[[TrueArtIsIncomphrensible They're just so good you can't comprehend them,]]so your mind loops them back to being godawful
24
25[[WMG: All the events of ''Main/BattlestarGalactica'' are [[AllJustADream just the president's hallucination]] due to her cancer.]]
26Please. God. No.
27* You know it doesn't like that name.
28
29[[WMG: [[MagicalGirlLyricalNanoha Nanoha]] is literally burning off her Main/LifeEnergy to power her magic.]]
30She's already sent herself to the hospital once for overuse. Regardless, she'll have a much shortened lifespan.
31* This may be the reason Fate keeps her at a safe distance despite [[RomanticTwoGirlFriendship their obvious mutual attraction]]. She doesn't want her partner to die way earlier than herself.
32* Isn't this canon? and AllThereInTheManual?
33** Yes, but but apparently Hayate put her foot down in ''Manga/ViVid'' and forced Nanoha to take a vacation without major magic so she could recover.
34** Shamal (who apparently acts as Nanoha's doctor) states in ''Anime/StrikerS'' Sound Stage 4 that Nanoha should take a year or two off of magic, but notes that Nanoha will likely do what she wants anyway. The leave, which apparently lasts between four and six years (She's on leave in Vivio, but back in Force), is most likely for Vivio's sake, to raise her until she's old enough to take care of herself.
35* WordOfGod states she burned out a percentage of her power in the final battle in ''[=StrikerS=]''.
36* Confirmed, but not as bad as it looks. The Blaster System is explicitly stated to enable the Hit Point to Magic Point conversion. So she does convert Life Force (that's what Hit Points represent) to Magic Points, but only when the Blaster System is enabled. Now that Nanoha is on break to recover her strength during [=ViviD=], much of the lost 10% of Nanoha's magic power will ''probably'' be back in time for Force. No worries.
37
38[[WMG: (Insert character here) dies in ''HarryPotter And The Deathly Hallows'']]
39We already have the book, so it's moot. But there were so many people dreading that various characters would be killed off that it's worth mentioning anyway.
40* There will be another book written and released for the sole purpose of killing off (insert character who survived ''Deathly Hallows'' here).
41* It's not moot. Snape kills [[{{Halo}} Master Chief!]]
42* [[{{Pun}} It's not moot. Snape kills]] [[{{Imageboard}} moot]].
43
44[[WMG: RobinWilliams is NOT God and has been dead since 1982.]]
45Just like in the "[[TheBeatles Paul is dead]]" theories, he's been replaced. You gotta admit, if you listen to "Reality, What A Concept" and then to "Live At The Met", then you'll notice a lot of difference... but still, no.
46
47[[WMG:Paul [=McCartney=] and Robin Williams were both kidnapped by the [[Manga/FullmetalAlchemist homunculi]] created by the RealLife Theocratus Bombastus Van Hohenheim, and the entire thing was Real Life-Pride and Real Life-Envy getting back at the world.]]
48* Someone watched a bit too much {{anime}}.
49* [[FlatWhat What.]]
50
51[[WMG: HaruhiSuzumiya is the EldritchAbomination daughter of [[NeonGenesisEvangelion Shinji Ikari]] and the latest sleeping reincarnation of AdolfHitler and [[SouthPark Eric Cartman]] combined, summoned by Nazis to bring about TheEndOfTheWorldAsWeKnowIt]]
52Yuki was one of the specific types of aliens Heinrich Himmler tried to contact and summon here on Earth. Itsuki is a part of an organization trying to stop the impending Apocalypse (Or is it?). Don't know about Mikuru, since it's classified information. Finally, the most damning of all: Kyon is part Jewish.
53* Kyon is [[SouthPark Kyle Broflovski]]? That makes a lot of sense.
54* Maybe it's just me, but that sounds like a pretty damn awesome end of the world.
55
56[[WMG: The majority of ''NeonGenesisEvangelion'' {{crossover}} theories are true]]
57Do we '''want''' to think that all these other shows are the product of mankind's collective consciousness after getting tang'd to death? Or worse, Shinji's own messed-up fantasies? And several of the "oh yeah, that was true" "theories" on [[WMG/NeonGenesisEvangelion NGE's own WMG page]] are {{squick}}y.
58* So, only the BibleBlack one is valid? You did say squicky.
59* RealLife is also [[TruthInTelevision valid]]. Like the above, you did say squicky.
60
61[[WMG: [[WMG/GirlGenius Gilgamesh Wulfenbach and Agatha Heterodyne]] share a parent]]
62As that series' own page says: Main/WordOfGod says, "[[Main/BigNo Noooooooooooooooooo!]]"
63* It's more likely that Gil and Zeetha share a parent, anyway.
64
65[[WMG: RealLife ''is'' part of the [[StElsewhere Tommy Westphall]] Omniverse.]]
66Turns out we've all been dead since 1994 and that [[Main/EveryoneIsJesusInPurgatory everyone is Jesus in a snowglobe]].
67
68SesameStreet is connected to the Tommy Westphallverse several times over. Big Bird appeared in person on {{Deal or No Deal}}. Donald Trump was also on ''Deal or No Deal'' once. (A number of Howie Mandel's statements indicate that ''Deal or No Deal'' does have a {{continuity}}.) Not only is Donald Trump connected to several actors through [[Series/TheApprentice the Celebrity Apprentice]] -- including Kevin Bacon, which puts virtually everyone and everything in Hollywood in the Westphallverse through the Six Degrees rule -- but he's also (apparently) connected to the real world.
69
70This is the reason that [[http://home.vicnet.net.au/~kwgow/crossovers.html this site]] doesn't count SesameStreet.
71
72[[WMG: [[WMG/DeathNote L]] was behind everything.]]
73Sometime prior to the series, L was bored because none of the crimes he solved were challenging for him. He managed to find a DeathNote and, after confirming its power, wrote "Beyond Birthday. Heart Attack. On January 21, 2004, Beyond's name is written in a DeathNote by someone who is willing to use the DeathNote to pursue some goal and has intelligence rivaling that of the person writing this. Beyond dies 40 seconds later."
74
75L then relinquished ownership of that Death Note.
76* Can you do that? Can you use a Death Note to cause someone else to write a person's death into a different Death Note?
77** Yes. The Death Note ''can'' cause or enable more Death Note-related deaths, or Light wouldn't have been able to take out all the initial investigators in Japan. [[hottip:* :He wrote the name of the director and made the detail of death that the director sent the name and pictures of the investigators to Ray Penburn, thus allowing for all of them to suffer Death Note-related deaths.]] L ''could'' have written that cause of death, since it only results in Death Note-related deaths.
78** No, Light wrote that [[spoiler:Penber would board the train and all that, but he told Penber directly to write down the names. Otherwise he could just make Penber find the death note envelopes in the luggage rack or something.]] The point was that you ''can't'' make people kill other people just by writing it in the death note.
79** Yes. He's not saying the other person to kill the guy with the Death Note, he's just saying he writes the name. But he already wrote the name himself on another Death Note, so the second writing has no effect, it's just some guy writing a name on a piece of paper.
80* Why the hell would L try to test the fake rules in the Death Note if he had already seen the true rules?
81** Because if he had relinquished it, then he wouldn't regain memory unless he held ''the same one he gave up.''
82* For implicit intent to kill, that is almost exactly how Light killed the FBI tail.
83
84[[WMG: The ''{{Mai-HiME}}'' and ''{{Mai-Otome}}'' animes take place in the same universe.]]
85There are enough random references to MaiHiME in MaiOtome to make the connection - but it makes no sense. It would require a ''lot'' of Main/ScotchTape to bridge the gap; even then, there are too many "coincidences" between the series, starting with all the not-quite-duplicate characters.
86* These would be the anime versions; the manga {{Pragmatic Adaptation}}s had that gap explicitly bridged.
87
88[[WMG: Anime/BottleFairy is about a young girl with a severe mental disability.]]
89[[http://denbeste.nu/Chizumatic/tmw/BottleFairy.shtml This page]] describes the theory and how it ruined some Anime lovers' enjoyment of the series.
90* Hell, that would be kinda awesome.
91* It would certainly be ''more'' awesome than the official plot.
92
93[[WMG: The sheer number of Main/{{Epileptic Tree}}s for the series ''Main/{{Lost}}'' will reach critical mass and cause the universe to collapse inward on itself and generate a new reality based on them.]]
94No later than 2011. Either that, or [[Main/{{TheHitchhikersGuideToTheGalaxy}} this has already happened]].
95* This is precisely what [[{{Main/TengenToppaGurrenLagann}} the Anti-Spirals]] feared. Clearly, ''Lost'' will be the end of us all!
96* Ah, so ''that's'' why {{ABC}} is making the series end in 2010!
97* This one happened InUniverse. It's the most logical explanation for the {{alternate reality}} now that we know what it truly is.
98
99[[WMG: ''Main/{{Lost}}'' was AllJustADream fabricated by Jack to come to terms with his father's death.]]
100
101This theory was seriously advanced by a fan on Lostpedia and was met by a chorus of "hell no."
102* After hearing what happened in the series finale for {{LOST}}, perhaps it should be reconsidered.
103** Not really. The writers stick in a line specifically to make sure you know everything really happened.
104
105[[WMG: Tropers/{{Janitor}}'s deletion of the "Paul [=McCartney=] Is Really Dead" theory that was on this page is confirmation that it is true and that Janitor is part of the Main/AncientConspiracy that is trying to cover it up.]]
106Paul isn't dead, the other Beatles were! {{Batman}} found the evidence.
107* Indeed, [[http://udel.edu/~mm/beatles/paulLives/paulLives.html Everyone But Paul is Dead]]. See [[WMG/TheBeatles The Beatles WMG for further details.]]
108
109[[WMG: [[TheBeatles Paul McCartney]] is dead--because an AncientConspiracy required the person who currently answers to that name to fill his position.]]
110
111[[WMG: [[ThereCanBeOnlyOne Paul McCartney is dead because his replacement]] [[KlingonPromotion killed him]]...]]
112
113[[WMG: DeathNote carrier [[TheBeatles John Lennon]] killed Paul [=McCartney=] out of spite and was killed when his Shinigami wrote his name.]]
114* Wait, the person who currently answers to "Paul [=McCartney=]" is a '''shinigami'''?!
115* Mark David Chapman is a shinigami, and ''TheCatcherInTheRye'' is a Death Note disguised as a pretentious paperback.
116
117[[WMG: [[{{Peanuts}} Charlie Brown]] has Cancer]]
118The baldness is from chemotherapy.
119
120''RobotChicken'' came up with this horrible theory.
121* There was a story called "Why, Charlie Brown, Why?" in which one of his friends had leukemia and underwent chemotherapy. If there ever was a good time for Charlie Brown to mention that he has cancer, then this was it, and he missed it.
122** You are assuming that Charlie Brown would get something right.
123* WordOfGod is that Charlie Brown has very light blond hair that his father, as a barber, always cuts extremely short; it looks almost invisible against his fair skin.
124** There's always LyingCreator. Or DeathOfTheAuthor. (No, not [[AuthorExistenceFailure that death...]])
125
126[[WMG: Most [[Series/DoctorWho Time Lord]] Theories.]]
127This troper even finds his own theory, ''VideoGame/MegaMan'' and every other character in the series is a time lord, insane and COMPLETELY stupid.
128* And ''unutterably'' tiresome. It's ''so old'', people.
129* ''You're'' a time lord, aren't you?
130** And the Megaman entry is his TARDIS.
131* The Q are better anyway.
132
133[[WMG: [[AzumangaDaioh Chiyo's parents are dead]]]]
134No they aren't, damnit! Although at least this WMG replaced the usual hell/purgatory guess with something a little less depressing.
135* Rest easy (or in peace); ''somebody'' had to rent that van for the second year trip to her summer home. (Maybe that yellow cat thing? Although you've gotta admit, the fact that her classmates are around as often as they are and ''never see either of them'' is... uh... maybe a cultural thing? Sakaki's cumulative imaginings should've been curtailed long before...)
136* Chiyo herself says that, as part of her daily routine, she wakes her parents up.
137** She "wakes her parents up" -- you mean that mannequin and that stuffed cat-thing?
138** We only see her open the door and call out for them to wake up. We never hear them answer nor see them join her for breakfast. But she just looked so cheerful.... There's no way that Chiyo could have an extreme form of denial about it. Nope, it's not possible. [[TearJerker * sniff* ]]
139
140[[WMG: [[Main/AngelicLayer Ryo Misaki]] was half-right.]]
141Ryo Misaki claims that he lost early on because the tournament was rigged and that, in a fair game, a boy would always beat a girl. His second point is later proven false when he loses a match against Misaki Suzuhara. But his first point is correct; all official tournaments ''are'' rigged against the male deuses. This has caused most males to stop playing.
142* It is more that the prototypes were designed using a female as the main tester. Women and men do think differently, and so there is this handicap in using the dolls that a male deus has to overcome. The ones that do are incredibly good; the ones that don't can't be buggered to continue. Between this and the feminine packaging and advertising, it's no wonder boys don't always play.
143
144[[WMG: [[Main/ThePowerOfLove Love]] is not the most powerful force in the universe.]]
145Despite what fictional media would have you believe.
146* So things like greed and hate are?
147** [[HumansAreBastards Well]], ''[[DullSurprise yes]],'' [[SlidingScaleOfIdealismVersusCynicism they]] [[SickSadWorld are]]. [[SillyRabbitIdealismIsForKids What]] could have possibly led [[WideEyedIdealist you]] to believe [[RousseauWasRight otherwise]]?
148*** Obviously, [[ThePowerOfHate Hate is the most powerful force in the universe]]. How can you fight if you do not hate? Jesus Was Wrong all the time.
149*** No, [[LiteralMetaphor gravity]] is the most powerful force in the universe. Do you want the proof that gravity is stronger than greed and hate? Try bribing a black hole into not spaghettifying you, or threatening it with your hate, after you fell past the event horizon. See if it works.
150**** Can you love a black hole into not spaghettifying you? it's like a [[IfYouKnowWhatIMean giant hole]] in space...
151**** Gravity is not the strongest force in the universe. Both Electromagnetic force and the Strong Nuclear force AND the WEAK Nuclear Force are stronger than it. If you need proof of the former, jump. Since you did not go through the floor (unless it broke underneath you, in which case why did you jump?) the electromagnetic force opposing gravity kept you from going through the floor.
152***** Well if we define love as the mutual attraction between two objects with mass, then yeah, by this WMG gravity isn't the most powerful object in the universe.
153***** Well, it really depends on the scale you're talking about. On large enough scales, it's gravity, no contest. Heck, too much of it can even DivideByZero (see also: UsefulNotes/BlackHoles). But on much smaller scales... like say the atomic level and smaller, gravity really can't do much of anything while the electromagnetic and nuclear forces are incredibly powerful (technology being the most obvious).
154***** The gravitational constant, coulomb's constant, etc. have different units. The forces themselves depend on the mass, charge, distance etc. of the objects.
155***** Gravity can't be the most powerful force because [[CompletelyMissingthePoint it isn't actually a force, but the downward acceleration towards the center of a body.]]
156****** Gravity, according to Einstein, is the wrinkles created in higher dimensions of space by objects in the dimensions we know and love. Other things find themselves 'falling into' the dip in the dimensions that the object's mass causes. However, M-theory and string theory suggest that this is caused by tiny particles called gravitons - most of which pass out into higher dimensions rather than sticking around here, hence why gravity is so astonishingly weak compared to the other forces (pick up an apple; your puny human arm is picking up an object which is being pulled on by the entire mass of the earth). It's very interested reading; but basically the point is that gravity is indeed a force, despite what high school physics might suggest.
157** According to capitalism, greed is. Concerning the fall of the Soviet Union, we might just as well accept this as TruthInTelevision.
158*** So it ''is'' love, then - just love of wealth.
159* [[Main/ThePowerOfFriendship Friendship]] and [[Main/ThePowerOfRock rock]] also aren't it.
160** It's not rock. It's a much more sinister form of music...hip-hop? Folk? Jazz? Polka? No one knows for sure.
161*** Brazilian funk. At least, ''evil'' is driven by this one.
162*** [[TheDresdenFiles Polka will never die!]]
163**** [[EternalSonata Well, she can use magic, so she's most probably dying]].
164*** Can't be rock. Paper covers rock.
165* Which obviously just leaves [[Main/ThePowerOfCheese cheese]].
166** No, Bacon, Mutton, and tomato sandwiches. Mainly the bacon.
167*** The Tomato, of course! All hail the Tomato!
168**** [[AndThenJohnWasAZombie And then I was a]] [[TomatoInTheMirror Tomato.]]
169**** Cake.
170**** [[VideoGame/{{Portal}} The Cake is a lie!]]
171**** Oh, [[DiscreditedMeme come off it already!]]
172* [[Main/TengenToppaGurrenLagann Spirit]].
173** ''Manly'' Spirit.
174*** Manly Spirit in ''Tights''.
175**** Manly Spirit in ''Leather'' Tights.
176**** [[RobinHoodMenInTights Manly Spirit in ''Tight'' Tights.]]
177***** Combine this with ThePowerOfRock (above), and you get [[HeavyMithril Power Metal]]. Q.E.D.
178** Not Spirit, but [[TheAlcoholic Spirits. And Beer. And Wine. And Alchopops for the teens.]]
179** Not Spirit, but [[{{Naruto}} YOUTH!]]
180* Money, of course.
181** [[TheBeatles But money can't buy me love. Everybody tells me so.]]
182*** It can, however, [[HookersAndBlow rent it]].
183** Everyone knows that [[{{Cabaret}} Money makes the world go round]].
184** [[{{ABBA}} It's a rich man's world.]]
185** You're all getting mixed up. [[{{PinkFloyd}} Money, so they say, is the root of all evil]].
186*** No, the ''[[TheBible love]]'' [[TheBible of money is the root of all evil.]]
187** MontyPython would tell you that there's nothing quite as wonderful as money, but it's ''accountancy'' that makes the world go 'round.
188* It's a cocktail of love, fear, unrealistic expectations, unwarranted self-importance, and [[Main/FinaglesLaw insufficient information]]. Let's call it...'loearealisarrantinsufation!'
189* [[KillItWithFIRE Fire.]]
190* Water.
191** "Thousands have lived without love, not one without water" -- W. H. Auden
192*** Oh, man! I prefer the Auden who said "We must love one another or die."
193** "Water is the lifeblood. Without it, things die." -- {{Dinotopia}}
194** "From water does all life begin." -- {{Dune}}
195** [[ElementalRockPaperScissors So water beats fire, sure, but fire beats earth, and earth clearly triumphs over water...]]
196*** ... Except in PokƩmon. Water>Ground and/or Rock.
197*** This troper has used topsoil to put out several campfires.
198* [[DCUniverse loneliness + alienation + fear + despair + self-worth - mockery - condemnation - misunderstanding x guilt x shame x failure x judgment n=y where y=hope and n=folly, love=lies, life=death, self=dark side]]
199* Math. Well, [[EverybodyHatesMathematics everybody hates it]] because nobody can handle its pure power.
200* E=mc[--[[superscript:2]]--].
201** No, it's [[EEqualsMCHammer E=mcHammer]]
202* It's the Power of Hot Bloodedness. Kamina was right all the time. [[spoiler:He died because he was afraid for a second.]]
203** Check it and see?
204*** [[AquaTeenHungerForce Fill your eyes, Fryman, with Double Vision]].
205* "The universe runs on matter, energy, and enlightened self-interest." -- BabylonFive
206* The entire universe runs on RuleOfCool.
207* The entire universe runs on RuleOfFunny. [[spoiler:RealLife is such a CrapsackWorld because the JerkassGods think we're hilarious [[HumansAreMorons idiots]], {{jerkass}}es and {{butt monkey}}s.]]
208* It's [[TheColbertReport gut]]. You ''know'' it is.
209* {{Room 101}}. [[NineteenEightyFour It's obviously stronger than love]].
210** We're doomed - but if there is hope, it lies in the proles.
211* [[LaResistance Resistance.]]
212** [[StarTrek Resistance is futile!]]
213*** [[AC:[[Series/DoctorWho You will be assimilated.]]]]
214* [[FreudWasRight Sex.]] Not love, but pure animal sex, [[RapeTropes if you know what I mean]].
215* The Strong Nuclear Force.
216* [[CloneHigh It's just an abstract concept, it can't knock down stuff.]]
217* [[HPLovecraft Cthulhu.]]
218* TrueArt.
219* Disco.
220** [[DeaderThanDisco Disco Is Deader!]]
221*** Or is Disco the ''[[ZombieApocalypse Undead]]''?
222* [[Warhammer40K Chaos.]]
223* [[DownerEnding Entropy]].
224* [[TheHitchhikersGuideToTheGalaxy 42]]
225* [[CaptainPlanet HEART!]]
226** WhatKindOfLamePowerIsHeartAnyway?
227*** HeartIsAnAwesomePower.
228* It's the power of ''Lung''. Not ''love'', not ''heart''. As Doctor Gregory {{House}} put it, "You can live for years without dreams. Lungs, not so much." Also. [[http://drmcninja.com/page.php?pageNum=21&issue=4 this]].
229* It's [[CuriosityIsACrapshoot curiosity]], you bloody idiots. Without curiosity we might not even have technology.
230* Alas, a cornucopia of love.
231** Au contraire, Snapeadoodle! 'Tis rather more oblong than cornucopial.
232* The most powerful force in the Universe is ''existence''. Without it, there literally is nothing else.
233** ''Nothing'' is the most powerful force in the Universe. Without existence, there is literally nothing indeed. Nothingness is the lack of things, the default background that overrides everything as it fades to when it ceases to exist.
234*** But as long as there is Existence, there is no absolute Nothing-- there's something everwhere, even if it's just empty space. Even an absolute vacuum is still stuffed with zero-point energy.
235* No, I'm the most powerful force in the universe. My consciousness is the only thing that is real, and everything else is a hallucination, including gravity and so on... making me the de facto Most Powerful Force in the Universe.
236** Holy shit, the Rail Tracer is a Troper!
237* RuleThirtySix wins hands down (no pun intended).
238*** ''THIS WHOLE DAMN THING IS PURELY A BULLSHIT ARGUMENT OF SEMANTICS, SO THERE.'' :P
239* The Brain. Without a working brain, not only you can't think, you can't breathe on your own, your heart can't pump blood, you can't do anything. Even if you have one hemisphere of your brain removed, the brain is capable of re-routing itself so that you only need the remaining half of your brain. It's one of the most important organs in the body.
240** [[PinkyAndTheBrain If the Brain is so powerful, why hasn't it been able to take over the world yet?]]
241** Don't worry, i'm working on it.
242*** And why is it always thinking what another, much weirder mouse is thinking?
243* Time Lords. Obviously.
244* [[NeonGenesisEvangelion The Instrumentality]]
245* HaruhiSuzumiya.
246* CHUCK NORRIS!!!!
247** Duh
248*** [[ThatGuyWithTheGlasses UH-CHUCK-UH-NOORRRRRISSSSSSSS!!!]]
249* [[BuffyTheVampireSlayer Faith]].
250* [[TheDresdenFiles Charity]].
251* You fools! LOVE isn't the most powerful force, but neither is Faith. It's [[ComicBook/TheSandman HOPE]]!
252* Despair, according to the {{Nietzsche Wannabe}}s.
253* GodwinsLaw. Even entropy, gravity and love use Hitler in arguments.
254* [[StarWars The Force.]]
255* Time for a wake-up call, folks: "force" is a vague, bullshit word to begin with, so the question of what is the strongest force is little more meaningful than the question of what is the strongest glooberflek.
256** [=CHUCK NORRIS IS THE STRONGEST GLOOBERFLEK!=]
257* There is no strongest force. All the forces have their strengths and weaknesses that [[PVPBalanced balance out]].
258** So which force is TheMario?
259* Half a brick in a sock.
260** Until [[BrickJoke the other half]] comes back later in the show.
261* Determinism. Every theory stated above was fated to happen by the motions of every individual space-time fiber of the universe from the beginning of time.
262* [[TerryPratchett Narrative Causality]].
263
264[[WMG:[[MorkAndMindy Mork]] is not an Orkan, but a Time Lord]]
265Come on, folks, enough is enough! ([[MemeticMutation yes, I know]], [[SnakesOnAPlane I've had it with these motherfucking time lords on this motherfucking wiki!]]) It's one thing to theorize that he's Jesus; but for once, can we accept that he's part of the alien race he says he is?
266* [[RummageSaleReject There is a resemblance.]]
267
268[[WMG:[[SuperMarioBros Mario]] is the son of Peach.]]
269And dear God, nothing similar to that in any way. EVER.
270* [[KickTheDog Too bad.]] The Mario WMG hypothesizes that [[LukeIAmYourFather Mario is]] ''Peach's'' ''[[LukeIAmYourFather father]]''. And it makes sense.
271* Don't worry, ''Mario and Luigi Partners in Time'' and ''Yoshi's Island DS'' confirm that Mario is only a year or so older than Peach.
272
273[[WMG: ''Bowser'' is [[{{Squick}} Peach's father]].]]
274 Eww.
275
276[[WMG: Baby Bowser is the result of Bowser raping Peach.]]
277Mario just casually watched...
278
279That would mean that [[MyOwnGrampa Bowser is his own father]]. {{Squick}}y.
280* At the end of ''Super Mario Sunshine'', Bowsers Sr. and Jr. admit that Peach isn't related. But they could be [[UnreliableNarrator in denial...]]
281
282[[WMG: ''Peach'' is ''Bowser's'' father.]]
283Why do you think she only kisses Mario? Obviously, this one belongs on this page.
284
285[[WMG: [[TransformersAnimated Sari]] and Bumblebee will form their own [[http://tfwiki.net/wiki/Kiss_Players Kiss Players]]-style partnership.]]
286Please, that is just {{squick}}. Most people count Kiss Players as {{discontinuity}} anyway.
287* {{Jossed}} because of revelations about Sari's ancestry.
288
289[[WMG: Nurse Joy and Officer Jenny are male ''and'' female of one or two different species of WMG/{{Pokemon}}.]]
290If this is true and becomes known to be true in all facets of the PokƩmon universe, then how will Brock react?
291* Are you kidding? He'll just bring new meaning to the term PokƩmon ''Breeder''.
292
293[[WMG: [[WMG/HarryPotter Draco Malfoy]] grows up to be Eminem, who grows up to be Sy Parrish from ''OneHourPhoto'']]
294Okay, ha ha, funny idea, sure (they're all [[Main/BlondGuysAreEvil blond guys with some degree of psychopathy]]). But with all the GrandUnifyingGuesses going on that all actors play the same character and Main/RobinWilliams is some sort of divine being, this would mean that Draco is Jesus (as if [[Main/DracoInLeatherPants he weren't worshipped enough]])... and even worse, Eminem is Jesus. DO NOT WANT.
295* Or Britney Spears is God... DO. NOT. WANT. SERIOUSLY.
296** LEAVE BRITTANY ALONE!! LEAVE HER ALONE!!! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!
297* And Eminem is the [[{{Wanted}} son of a supervillain]] with ImprobableAimingSkills.
298
299[[WMG: [[{{Bleach}} Orihime]] is making the whole thing up]]
300Oh, dear God, no.
301* But it would make quite a TwistEnding.
302* Some would go for anything to invalidate the ShipToShipCombat that's been going on for years. HAHA! LOSERS!
303* The Hougyouku is making Orihime make the whole thing up
304
305[[WMG: Orihime is catatonic in a psych ward, and {{Bleach}} is an elaborate fantasy concocted by her schizophrenic mind.]]
306And she is so deeply depressed that, even in her own schizophrenic fantasy, the guy she wants doesn't want her.
307* Awww......
308
309[[WMG:All characters with the same name are the same character]]
310Seriously, that is going way too far. For one thing, "All Captain Jacks are the same", "All people named Eva point to that [[NeonGenesisEvangelion Eva]]", "All people named Adolf is that [[AdolfHitler Adolf]]", "Obama is Osama" is headache-inducing (albeit being an interesting WMG fuel). It Gets Worse: this would mean sweet little [[MorkAndMindy Mork from Ork]] is also [[Warhammer40K an Ork]]. No. Seriously, this is madness! (Yes, yes, [[MemeticMutation we know]]. '''ThisIsSPARTA'''!!!)
311* Depending on whether RealLife is a fandom or not, this could make StephenColbert's life extremely interesting.
312** As he's an ACTION BISHIE TRAINER from {{Pokemon}} games, or a famous director?
313* You know, this explains the OneSteveLimit. Steve can't be in two places at once.
314** But two Steves can. And both are being controlled by Malik.
315
316
317[[WMG: {{WMG/Code Geass}} R2? More like [[{{Main/GundamSeedDestiny}} Code Geass DESTINY]]]]
318It seems like the creators are making Code Geass head into precisely this direction. [[spoiler: [[{{Main/AnyoneCanDie}} About two thirds of the people the audience cared about are dead as of episode 18, including the reason the conflict in the series started]]]]; they've thrown in just about any and every excuse to make the audience hate Suzaku and Kallen; and...it's going too crazy to adhere to any logical procession. What ''really'' doesn't help is that Code Geass and DESTINY are by the same studio (Sunrise and Bandai). To salvage any credibility the show has, Jeremiah Gottwald must become a [[DarkHorseVictory dark horse]] under the tutelage of Andy Waltfeld (the Gundam character) and Andy Waltfeld ([[Main/AndyWaltfeld the Troper]]). THERE WILL BE BLOOD (or in C.C.'s case, marinara sauce).
319* Depending on who you talk to, this theory panned out. Unfortunately.
320
321[[WMG: Lillith was Main/DeadAllAlong in Animamundi: Dark Alchemist]]
322The first ending most players get (especially with the Bug in the English version) is "Quiet Corrosion," in which Lillith has become infected with some kind of mold, and dies. The computer graphics imply she rots away instantly, which is... awfully fast, unless Georik had been under the delusion that his bodiless sister was alive... when she wasn't.
323
324This had better not be true.
325
326[[WMG: [[WMG/MurderSheWrote Jessica Fletcher]] is the killer. Every time.]]
327See WMG/MurderSheWrote (this is the WMG link) for details.
328
329[[WMG: The [[WMG/AvatarTheLastAirbender Air Nomads]] ''deserved'' to be wiped out.]]
330The reason all Air Nomads are air benders isn't because of their deep spirituality, but because any children who don't demonstrate air bending abilities by a certain age are executed.
331* Even if that was true, it still wouldn't mean they deserved genocide; their own (surviving) children would still be innocent of their culture's wrongdoing.
332** The Fire Nation never attacked the Air Nomads' children during the attacks; the Air Nomads themselves killed their children when it became apparent that they were going to lose.
333* Worst part of these theories: the Fire Nation kidnapped young female Air Benders and proceeded to make them sex slaves, making their descendants lose all that power through the years. Ty Lee is a powerless half Air Nomad, half Fire Nation citizen, having lesser rights and more stripperiffic clothes. [[{{Squick}} Squicky enough.]] The theory that all the powerless Air Nomads ran away to other nations is better.
334** The part with Ty-Lee makes no sense because she's clearly upper class, since she's hanging around the likes of Azula and Mai.
335*** No, Ty Lee is Azula's slave according to the "one drop of airbender blood" rule. Palace slaves have to look classier than field slaves so they don't ruin the decor.
336**** But Ty Lee is a daughter of a noble and part of a septuplet set.
337***** The theory could still hold. When a noble sleeps with a slave, the children are gonna be slaves.
338****** Depends on the culture's rules and taboos. In some cultures, it follows the father or the mother, or even the children of the owner are free simply because it's taboo to own your own kin. The last was true among the Norse, to the point where you have an enslaved princess being both the favorite wife of her owner-husband but also the mother of his favorite (free) son...
339
340[[WMG: Every theory on this page is true.]]
341Especially those that are mutually exclusive.
342
343[[WMG: The previous theory is false.]]
344
345[[WMG: Boa Hancock is [[OnePiece Luffy's]] mom]]
346Because, apparently, looking vaguely similar means you're related. You wouldn't believe how popular this theory was for a short time, despite having as much basis as the {{Shipping}}. It would be all kinds of horrifying and messed up, considering her love for Luffy and his probably being ''nearly half her age''.
347* Given that there's a far more obvious and likely candidate (the woman running the tavern in his hometown), this just shows you how people WILL go for the freakout theories.
348* When Boa first appeared in the story, it seemed like every other person was screaming this from the top of their lungs despite the utter lack of evidence for it. Now this theory is DeaderThanDisco; no one will admit to ever having believed it because of how stupid and unlikely it is in retrospect. The whole experience shows that there isn't any correlation between how much credible evidence supports a theory and how widely believed it is.
349* This is why Boa's falling for Luffy was a fandom-wide CrowningMomentOfFunny. It finally crushed all desperate hopes that she was his mom [[SeriousBusiness and seriously angered a lot of overzealous anti-shippers.]] Two birds with one stone!
350** Even better is how Boa falling for Luffy had a better chance of happening and was a more realistic outcome, and yet virtually no one seriously believed it would happen.
351** It could be worse...
352* Why is this theory dead? Anyone heard of [[OedipusRex that Oedipus guy]]? Think about it: Boa is protecting Luffy, loves feeding him, and would give up her life so he can achieve his goals. She's not acting like a ''lover''... She's acting like a ''mother''. There, now please pass the {{brain bleach}}.
353
354[[WMG: Crocodile is Luffy's mother.]]
355No.
356* OnePiece is just one of those series that would make this ''likely'' to happen in canon.
357
358[[WMG: Delia is Ash's father.]]
359And [[MemeticMutation GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK]] is Ash's mother.And a Time Lord
360
361[[WMG: Sheldon from ''[[GarfieldAndFriends U.S. Acres]]'' is anti-abortion propaganda.]]
362He's not born yet, but he's a sentient being!
363
364[[WMG: Everything that happens to Jack in ''[[PiratesOfTheCaribbean At World's End]]'' is all in his head.]]
365It was obvious that Jack was going crazy in the Locker, what with imagining a crew made entirely of Jack Sparrows. It's possible that he simply hallucinated everything afterwords. Oh, and everyone in the ship with Barbossa fell off the edge of the world and died.
366* Well, yeah, they did. Notice how they ended up in Davey Jones's Locker?
367
368And about Elizabeth Swann? Her son was taken, but she wasn't, meaning one of these things:
369# She was kept to be repeatedly raped.
370# She killed herself to prevent that possibility, throwing herself into the sea to be reunited with Will Turner for eternity. (This theory is more romantic.)
371* Number two suits her character more. She wouldn't let herself be raped by a bunch of dirty nobodies.
372
373[[WMG: Beckett/Sao Feng hates Jack Because....]]
374# ...Of an out of control, escalating prank war that ended with Jack shaving Sao Feng's pubes. It's the burn that just keeps burnin'.
375# Jack broke Beckett's heart:
376*
377-->'''Beckett''': "And we each left out mark on the other."\
378'''Will''': "And what mark did Jack leave on you?"\
379'''Beckett''': * suspicious expression*
380*
381-->'''Jack''': "It points to the thing you want most."\
382'''Beckett''': "And what is that?"\
383'''Jack''': "Me. ''Dead''."
384** Waitwaitwaitwait....Beckett is a necrophiliac now?
385*** Not every want is a sexual one. OrSoIHeard.
386
387[[WMG: {{Friends}}, the show, is set in a world with few black people]]
388''Far'' fewer black people then in our world.
389* The movie ''NottingHill'' is set in the same universe. How else to explain the complete absence of black people in a neighborhood of London that has an annual carnival run by its residents to celebrate their Caribbean heritage?
390** {{Timeline 191}}?
391
392[[WMG: {{Friends}} is set in a white neighborhood in one of these uber-racist states.]]
393* So [[BigApplesauce New York]] is an ''uber-racist state'' now? It was made clear that that's where the series was set.
394** In the {{Friends}} universe, it is.
395
396[[WMG: In the ''Friends'' universe, an extremely violent race riot destroyed Harlem and turned New York into a [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sundown_town sundown town]].]]
397
398[[WMG: [[StarWars Jar-Jar is a Jedi]]]]
399If Whedon can write in-canon comics, then Lucas can write one that says Jar-Jar is rich in the Force. They are already getting closer. One of the ''StarWars: Clone Wars'' CGI episodes has a Clone Trooper using Jar-Jar's incompetence as a tactical advantage.
400* Jar-Jar's incompetence ''is'' a tactical advantage. It makes him a force of nature.
401* Good thing [[SpannerInTheWorks Power of Incompetence]] is a trope....
402* [[DarthsAndDroids Jar-Jar, you're a genius!]]
403* The ''Star Wars'' website once ran a poll asking how you interpret Obi-Wan's claim that "In my experience, there's no such thing as luck". The two options were "He's leaning on that [[FromACertainPointOfView 'certain point of view']] thing again" and "Jar-Jar is the greatest Force user ever."
404** It could just be that Obi-Wan's "experience" is pathetically limited. Maybe he needs to get out more. Go to Vegas. Gamble a bit.
405
406[[WMG: There are {{plothole}}s between the StarWars Original Trilogy and the prequels because they take place in {{alternate universe}}s.]]
407 No one knows what happens before the OT or after the prequels.
408* What's Poison Oak about that? It's quite reassuring and a common fan theory.
409
410[[WMG: ''[[YesPrecure5 Yes! Pretty Cure 5]]'' is Nozomi hallucinating as she bleeds to death in a wrecked school bus.]]
411The first episode featured Nozomi seeing most of the main characters just before getting on the bus or while she was on it. Then the bus suddenly jerked to a halt. This was the crash. Nozomi is so distressed by the knowledge that she's going to die before she even knows what she wants to do with her life that she rejects this reality entirely, coming up with a new one starring herself, the guy she met a few minutes ago, two other people on the bus, the girl from the poster, and the girl who was in the other vehicle.
412* Whoever invented this theory is a [[TearJerker jerk ;_;]]
413* The jerk in question [[HoistByHisOwnPetard agrees with you.]]
414
415[[WMG: Tony Bedard's and Andrew Kreisberg's writing of the Oracle/Black Canary dynamic in recent comics is a subtle and deep statement on relationships.]]
416It was detailed by poster "bluefall" on a Scans Daily comment thread. The theory was entirely internally consistent and explained every known fact in all the relevant comics, and it was the only theory ever presented (so far) which could explain every fact in the comics. And most fans of Black Canary and/or Oracle would rather believe it's all CharacterDerailment.
417* Including Bluefall, mind, who hates Kreisberg passionately.
418
419[[WMG:''{{Yotsubato}}!'': It's going to [[ItGotWorse get worse]]. It's going to have a DownerEnding.]]
420Either by CreatorBreakdown or planned all along.
421* There was a doujin where all ended in an Apocalypse to then show Yotsuba and her dad (by pure luck, in his case) alive AfterTheEnd, and the little one was considered a Super-Human. It was quite sad, but awesome at the same time.
422** Wait, you mean Yotsuba's hair is green because she grows up to be [[YokohamaKaidashiKikou Alpha Hatsuseno]]?
423* Yotsuba will be taken away from Koi by social services. This happens beacuse of a new neighbor who sees him in his underwear hanging around with a little girl who, despite his claims of being his daughter, looks nothing like him.
424** But this doesn't ''have'' to be the DownerEnding to confirm.
425
426[[WMG: ''[[{{doujinshi}} Four]] [[GannonBanned Leaf]] [[{{Hentai}} Lover]]'' is {{canon}} for {{Yotsubato}}!]]
427
428[[WMG:''{{Yotsubato}}!'': Yotsuba is an Alien.]]
429A green haired girl who was found by her foster father "somewhere" abroad? For all we know, he could have found her in a jungle pyramid built by aliens.
430* Alien jungle pyramid? But of course! Yotsuba is actually [[StargateSG1 Hathor accidentally rejuvinated by Linea's]] "fountain of youth" gas which causes amnesia and makes you decades younger. Either she's lost her memory and will go on a rampage when the stargate program is made public and she starts regaining her memories, or she's already regained her memory and is cleverly manipulating those around her to become her unquestioning minions.
431
432[[WMG: Koiwai is [[{{Blame}} Killy]] and Yotsuba is the child with the Net Terminal Genes.]]
433The Safeguard recreates 21st-century Japan (surely they have enough space) to help the child develop at a stress-free environment. Killy gets to be her guardian since she always clings to him. Old characters are recycled and tweaked to support the two and monitor the child's growth. These include Cibo (Asagi), Sana-Kan (Torako), Dhomo (Jumbo) and Seu (Yanda).
434
435[[WMG:Those characters played by the same actor are the same person.]]
436If there's additional logic behind it, well, sure. But if you're going to write a convoluted and illogical biography about how Truman Burbank became a pet detective and then a green Seussian monster and then The Riddler, that's just not clever.
437* To be fair, a convoluted and illogical biography is better then simply listing characters an actor has played and saying they're the same person.
438* How about this one? Joe Kline works with the Flash in Central City, runs into some trouble, and ends up reassigned to Metropolis as Inspector Henderson, where he works with Clark Kent/Superman and Lois Lane. After he gets into trouble there, he's sought out by the Baltimore City Police Department, where he becomes a member of the Homicide Division for six years, continuing to work with strange cases on his side time. He then becomes a member of the Manhattan Special Victims Unit. After this many years in police work with the weirdest of crimes and cases, it's only natural that one day, when something strange enough has happened, he'd want to run for President - and make it - and that, boys and girls, is why Richard Belzer is the U.S. President in ''{{Species}} II.''
439* It is possible for Truman Burbank to be a per detective, Mr. Grinch, and the Riddler. You know why? He was been given all the power of [[BruceAlmighty God]].
440* [[HarryPotter Cedric Diggory]] didn't die, he became [[Literature/{{Twilight}} Edward Cullen]]. And [[HarryPotter Sirius Black]] didn't [[spoiler: die]] either, he became [[{{Batman}} Commissioner Gordon]].
441** and Barty Crouch is... say it with me, people.
442*** Trigger from [[CompletelyMissingThePoint OnlyFoolsAndHorses?]]
443* In which case, [[{{FantasticFour}} Johnny Storm]] isn't just the fireball from the Fantastic Four. He has a secret identity. He's really Captain America.
444* Dick Loudin and Bob Hartley are the same -- even though the one is just the dream of the other...
445* James Bond is the father of Indiana Jones.
446* Holy crap on a cracker! That means that Seely Booth IS Angel! That's why he's so mysterious all the time, why he's such an oddball, AND why he's trying to atone for killing people as a sniper - he Shanshued, the Powers That Be resurrected him as a human, and he's STILL screwing up!
447* And [[DarkwingDuck Quackerjack]] is [[{{Legacy of Kain}} Raziel!]] That explains so m-..um.. okay, maybe that one's a fail.
448
449[[WMG:[[SluggyFreelance Pete Abrams]] has no clue what Oasis is.]]
450He's just making stuff up for her as he goes along, and we will ''never'' find out what she is, how her programming works, or why she's so important. The series will end with Oasis as one giant "?"
451* Fortunately, {{Jossed}}. Although not everything's clear yet, the week of June 7th revealed a ''big'' piece of the puzzle -- enough by itself to keep her from being just a question mark when the series ends. It's something that no-one was expecting, but it ''does'' fit in retrospect.
452
453[[WMG: None of this matters.]]
454We're picking apart and analysing make-believe.
455* Just because it's make-believe doesn't mean it doesn't matter, only that it doesn't matter to ''you''.
456
457[[WMG: It all matters]]
458Anyone who saya otherwise is trying to keep us from reaching the truth. It's a government conspiracy.
459
460[[WMG:It ''anti''-matters.]]
461And it will cause [[YourHeadAsplode your brain to explode]] [[SchmuckBait if you think about it]].
462
463[[WMG: Every series currently in production will be unexpectedly cancelled or [[GainaxEnding Gainaxed]].]]
464The networks decided to cut the newer series rather than the less popular series after the writers' strike when their ratings went down from people dropping the habit of watching TV. Every fun show will either be abruptly cancelled (TheMiddleMan, PushingDaisies) or fall to fatal CerebusSyndrome ({{Psych}}, SpongeBob). Older shows that thrive on each season being the last, such as {{ER}}, won't be renewed. Only {{reality show}}s and cartoons that haven't been funny for the last decade will survive. Then the economy will collapse because nobody watches commercials any more, and the suicide rate will rise to over 95%. The last few humans will become feral cannibals, all because the [[ExecutiveMeddling Executive Meddlers]] did not pay attention to what was popular.
465* Add very old [[{{Emmerdale}} soap]] [[CoronationStreet operas]] to the list of nonsense that will survive. This may soon be true for every series on {{ITV}}, which is cutting back on its drama department (TheBill, for instance, has been cut back to once a week, but has been made HotterAndSexier as a trade-off) and is instead focusing on {{reality television}} programming. In the last half-decade, we have seen the axe of weekday CITV, instead choosing to focus on the CITV Channel, which airs mostly cartoons (and live action shows) that haven't been funny in the last decade.
466* Mmmm, [[{{Gainaxing}} Gainax]]- oh.
467
468[[WMG: [[TinMan Glitch and Azkedellia]] have some sort of strange relation to [[Literature/{{Wicked}} Fiyero and Elphaba]], perhaps reincarnation of some sort]]
469Look at TinMan fanfiction. When Cain's too busy snogging D.G. to notice Glitch, Glitch is too busy snogging the other princess to pay attention to Cain. This level of ignorance of the OfficialCouple is extreme even for FanFic. And half the time, when Glitch/Az is mentioned, it's "Oh! We're the Literature/{{Wicked}} canon couple reincarnated/in disguise/because we're time lords who made ourselves human in that first life/whatever."
470
471[[WMG: In the next chapter of the Manga/FullmetalAlchemist manga, Envy will transform into Hawkeye, there will be a huge explosion, and Roy will forget which Hawkeye is which and kill the real one.]]
472* {{Jossed}}. [[spoiler:Envy's dead, and Riza's still alive.]]
473
474[[WMG: [[WMG/TheDarkKnightSaga The Joker]] is the way older [[WMG/CalvinAndHobbes Calvin]].]]
475To quote a certain anonymous troper, "[[BigNo NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!]] NO! [[ChildrenAreInnocent NONONONONO!]] [[CanonDefilement *whimper* ]]..."
476* He became a psychopathic killer after his parents, concerned with his childish attachment to a stuffed animal, destroyed Hobbes in front of him to prove a point.
477--> You wanna know how I got these scars?
478* [[WMG/CalvinAndHobbes No,]] Calvin and Hobbes [[http://metaphilm.com/philm.php?id=29_0_2_0/ become "Jack" and Tyler Durden...]]
479** [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/WMG/TheDarkKnightSaga Who says the two are mutually exclusive?]]
480*** The Joker "got those scars" when Jack [[spoiler: tried to blow his brains out but really just tore open his face at the end.]]
481* Calvin fell into the tiger pit at a young age, causing permanent brain damage and putting him into a coma. Everything that happens in the comic is in his head while he sits connected to a life support machine in a hospital somewhere.
482
483[[WMG: In a similar vein, Calvin's ultimate fate is [[http://comicsidontunderstand.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2008/01/calvin2.gif this]]]]
484* A quote from [[WMG/CalvinAndHobbes the comic's WMG page]]:
485--> "Congratulations, you've written the single most depressing WMG ever."
486
487[[WMG: [[http://www.voidspace.org.uk/voidspace/images/calvintheend.jpg THIS]] is Calvin's ultimate fate.]]
488It is the most depressing WMG regarding Calvin's future.
489* [[TearJerker Aaaaaargh my childhood.]]
490
491[[WMG: As the "Casper" movie makes it quite clear that "Casper" died after contracting pneumonia whilst ''sledging,'' we can infer that Casper is the ghost of Calvin]]
492Given that Hobbes's ghost conspicuously never appears, we can also definitively answerer the debate as to whether animals have souls: No. [[DownerEnding Youā€™re welcome.]]
493* Hobbes is a rare Mongolian stuffed tiger; his soul was replaced with fluff by genetics.
494
495[[WMG: Casper is the ghost of [[http://thatguywiththeglasses.com/videolinks/thatguywiththeglasses/nostalgia-critic/12665-casper Charlie Brown, who was bald as he was dying of cancer.]]]]
496
497[[WMG: Similar to the Joker being the adult Calvin, CerebusTheAardvark is the adult {{Arthur}}]]
498It doesn't make much sense, but this IS Dave Sim.
499
500[[WMG: "Normal Again" is right, and [[BuffyTheVampireSlayer Buffy]] is dreaming the whole Buffyverse.]]
501
502[[WMG: The sixth and seventh seasons of BuffyTheVampireSlayer happened exactly as filmed. Especially the wall bangers.]]
503JossWhedon is a cruel god.
504
505[[WMG: At least some of the {{One Piece}} shippers, despite common sense, will ''turn out to have been right all along.'']]
506Maybe they ''all'' are right.
507* If so, then we can [[LyingCreator never trust anything Oda says again.]]
508** The guy also said that he once saw a kappa (Japanese water sprite)...why do we trust anything he says NOW?
509
510[[WMG:[[Series/DoctorWho The Tenth Doctor]] has no superpowers, expertise with technology, or alien heritage]]
511He is just a very lucky, very hammy, very crazy human.
512* Jossed, fortunately. We saw The Ninth Doctor regenerate into The Tenth Doctor. And we saw the Tenth Doctor grow a hand back in his first major appearance, too.
513* ...''and'' the show is an {{unreliable narrator}}. So There.
514
515[[WMG:[[Series/DoctorWho The Ninth Doctor]] was "youthened" into an infant by the Heart of the TARDIS just like Margaret Blaine.]]
516Since Time Lords age differently than humans, his infant form -- the form we mistakenly call "Ten" -- looks like a young human. Unfortunately, while this might have made him cute, it also nullified centuries of hard-won experience and wisdom. This is why his behavior became so erratic.
517
518It also explains why he seems to have suddenly acquired an unironic interest in human women. He imprinted on Rose like a baby duck, and her romantic advances (which any previous Doctor would have brushed aside with a joke) fed into an Oedipal complex.
519
520[[WMG: Time Lords get physically younger with each regeneration.]]
521The reason they don't have more than 12 is that, after #12, they regenerate into separate sperm and egg.
522* It gets worse. The reason the Doctor always seems to have a female travelling companion around is because, if he ever gets killed so many times in quick succession that he reverts to a sperm and egg, the sperm and egg can impregnate his companion, and he'll be reborn with his full number of regenerations and all his old memories. The eleventh Doctor didn't ''accidentally'' leave Amy Pond at her young age and skip to her when she's old enough to get married; he did it ''intentionally'' so that he had a woman around who was capable of being pregnant if he needed to be born again. The reason he responds more to his companion's advances as he regenerates younger and younger is because as he gets closer to the sperm and egg stage, he wants to be more certain that his companions are physically and mentally mature enough for pregnancy. Companions like Ace were more like an investment for the far future.
523** Unfortunately, this troper just realized that this actually explains [[spoiler:Amy's schrodiger Pregnancy]] as of [[spoiler:the doctor's death]] in ''The Impossible Astronaut''.
524
525The 12th Doctor will be in the form of a 10 year old human, or a 10 month old human.
526
527[[WMG:[[OnePiece Tashigi]] is Kuina's long lost twin sister.]]
528This is one of the more commonly believed explanations for her existence. If the WildMassGuessing page is any indication, then we have more reason to believe that Tashigi IS Kuina. And let's be honest...this theory is lame. Fandom DOES prefer the strange freak-out theories to the more obvious and likely ones.
529* Is it okay to want Zoro to be reunited with his best friend? His back story is so sad...
530* WHY SHOULDN'T HE MIRACULOUSLY FIND HIS BEST FRIEND AGAIN?! DON'T YOU PEOPLE HAVE HEARTS?!
531* It's not a lack of heart. Ever heard of [[SillyRabbitIdealismIsForKids this trope?]] Just ask the ''{{Naruto}}'' fans who were so sure for a while that AnyoneCanDie.
532* All moot. According to Oda, it is just a coincidence.
533** Again, Oda once said that he saw a kappa. Therefore, we can't trust anything he says.
534
535[[WMG:[[AvatarTheLastAirbender The Zutarians were right; Maiko]] ''was'' written solely to [[PairTheSpares pair Zuko off]] [[ShipSinking with someone else.]]]]
536....LIKE WORMS CRAWLING UNDER MY SKIN.
537* Pfft, I'm glad about that. (Is a KataAang shipper) So there.
538
539[[WMG: [[AvatarTheLastAirbender Mike and Bryan]] never wanted all the {{filler}} and {{fanservice}} in season 3 of AvatarTheLastAirbender.]]
540They were forced to do it because of ExecutiveMeddling; the execs wanted to hook in the PeripheryDemographic, and some people disliked the less episodic season 2.
541
542This is the reason it took so long for the third season to air.
543
544The possibility makes you wonder, don't it?
545
546[[WMG: Mike and Bryan were forced to add filler and FanService to the third season of every television show that lasted that long.]]
547 Or maybe just the third season of every television show on {{Nickelodeon}}.
548
549[[WMG: Mike and Bryan were sick of AvatarTheLastAirbender by early third season, and doing the stuff above was the only thing keeping them sane.]]
550
551[[WMG: [[AvatarTheLastAirbender Azula]] forced Mike and Bryan to add the filler and fanservice]]
552Wait, why are you laughing?
553
554[[WMG:When John Ratzenberger dies, Pixar movies will stop being good.]]
555They say he's their lucky charm, and he seems to be a good one. Still, he'll die someday.
556* This isn't unrealistic. It's all but inevitable that Pixar will eventually make genuine stinkers. And often, a company goes through some weirdness when one of its head execs is gone.
557* Ratzenburger isn't anything resembling a head exec. They did lose their head exec, John Lasseter (he's head of Disney Animation now); since then, they made {{Ratatouille}}, ''Wall-E,'' and {{Up}}, and so Pixar's all right without him. Before then, they lost important creative personnel here and there, and they're not the biggest company, so it's amazing that they persisted. But Ratzenberger is special... just because.
558** Lasseter is the head of Disney Animation, ''which includes Pixar''. They haven't lost him, he's just in charge of more things.
559
560[[WMG:Every character in all of fiction, and all {{real life}} people throughout history, are [[Series/DoctorWho Time Lords.]]]]
561With the sole exception of the Doctor, who isn't. They're just humouring him. His little 'last of the Time Lords' angst bit is so ''cute''!
562* This one's plausible. If you think about it, everyone is technically a time traveler: we're going forward in time at a 1:1 ratio. Time Lords are time travelers. Therefore, InsaneTrollLogic insists that all living creatures are Time Lords. Including the ClockRoaches and, if we include fiction, the [[Series/DoctorWho Daleks]].
563* The Emperor Dalek in "City of the Daleks," having claimed [[AppliedPhlebotinum The Eye of Time]], claims that the Daleks ARE indeed now Time Lords...
564
565[[WMG:Viagra is made from Smurfs]]
566Explains why Gargamel is so eager to catch them. (He now works for Pfizer.)
567* [[{{Squick}} Poor, poor Azrael]].
568
569[[WMG:Everything Ask That Guy says is true.]]
570He's not insane.He sees the world [[CrapsackWorld for how it is.]]
571
572[[WMG:''TheChroniclesOfFate'' is RealLife, and RealLife isn't.]]
573 [[{{Mind Screw}} It is]]. [[{{Defictionalization}} It'll turn out to be this way]]. [[{{Cassandra Truth}} You'll see]].
574
575[[WMG:[[OrderOfTheStick The Monster in the Darkness]] is [[{{Yu-Gi-Oh}} Zorc]].]]
576
577[[WMG: [[OrderOfTheStick The Monster in the Darkness]] is a [[{{Zork}} Grue]].]]
578
579[[WMG: [[OrderOfTheStick The Monster in the Darkness]] '''is''' a large black lump with beady yellow eyes.]]
580
581[[WMG: [[OrderOfTheStick Rich Burlew]] will lose interest and [[KilledOffForReal kill off]] the [[TotalPartyKill entire Order]] while they are going under a [[DroppedABridgeOnHim stone bridge]].]]
582RocksFallEveryoneDies.
583
584[[WMG: All of [[OkamI Amaterasu's]] adveture were her dying hallucinations, and she is a normal dog.]]
585Amaterasu is just a normal dog who's dying and hallucinating in her final moments. Eveyone she meets in the game are people who'd been in her life in one way or another; what role they have indicates what relationship they had with her.
586* ...Please, no. It... it makes sense (what with the slightly mangled legends and all), but... please don't let it be true.
587
588[[WMG: ''SuperSmashBros Brawl'' is [[MetalGear Old Snake]]'s deathbed hallucination in which he recalls the joy of battle.]]
589We know from ''The Twin Snakes'' that Otacon is a {{Nintendo}} fan; therefore, Snake certainly knows all the characters in this game, if only by osmosis. He dresses like he did during the best years of his life, but it's his beloved support team from ''MetalGearSolid'' who help him. He's remembering the pleasure of slaughtering his enemies, channelled into the pleasure of beating up Samus Aran with a paper fan. Maybe Otacon slipped a hallucinogenic painkiller into his drip to ease him off.
590
591[[WMG: In 2012...]]
592The world won't end -- it will ''reset'' back to the beginning of the Mayan calendar. The world has been trapped in a gigantic time loop for who knows how many eons, and until one of us invents {{time travel}} and stops the Mayans from inventing their calendar in the first place, we will continue to play out the same events over and over and over. . .
593* Time travel wouldn't work. If you went back before the calendar begins, then it would loop you back around to before it ends. Modular arithmetic works both ways.
594** The only way to break the loop is to [[FinalFantasy travel back in time 2000 years and kill Chaos]].
595* [[SuzumiyaHaruhi We have entered an endless recursion of time.]]
596** Maybe we should try doing our homework.
597* Nah. Time loops can be escaped ''[[AnotherDimension radially]]''. That's what the Large Hadron Collider is for.
598** Sherman, set the [=WABAC=] machine to '''sideways'''!
599* Sounds like ''WapsiSquare'' to me.
600
601[[WMG: Ayu in {{Kanon}} did die seven years ago.]]
602She was just a ghost, not an astral projection or whatever. Yuichi simply fell into another delusion because he couldn't bear losing her again when she vanished the second time. He already gave himself LaserGuidedAmnesia last time; now he's just living in a dream world.
603
604[[WMG: [[TouhouProject ZUN]] will die of alcohol poisoning.]]
605The man is almost never seen without a beer, and many scenes from official works show the cast drinking heavily. In particular, Aya, the character mocked for being his girlfriend or self-insert, is second only to Suika in drinking. Speaking of, Aya mentions in her interview with Reimu that humans cannot tolerate alcohol as much as yokai...a subconscious cry for intervention?
606
607[[WMG: [[WildArms3 Wild ARMs 3]] essentially ended after the events at Yggdrasil.]]
608The reason for a certain GiantSpaceFleaFromNowhere and all-too-familiar demon coming into play? Everything from that point out was Virginia's DyingDream. Werner's cure for that nanomachine infection initially appeared to work, letting her return temporarily to health; but in the end... he failed his daughter ''again'', and this time in a far worse way than the whole ParentalAbandonment deal.
609
610[[WMG: Every WildMassGuessing theory is true.]]
611Even these.
612
613[[WMG: Every WildMassGuessing theory is wrong.]]
614[[LogicBomb Even this one.]]
615* [[MindScrew C-C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER!]]
616
617[[WMG: Orihime is going to die a pointless and tragic death in {{Bleach}}]]
618Given that, so far, all her attempts to help Ichigo have ended in failure, and given that she failed to do anything after [[spoiler:Ulquiorra temporarily killed him]]), she may try to sacrifice herself to protect Ichigo -- only for that to prove useless, too. As she lies dying, she will realize that everyone forgot about the Hogyoku (the ArtifactOfDoom she had planned to destroy with her powers after the villains' defeat). She will then make one last confession of love to Ichigo, who will say that he loves her, too. She may not know whether he means it, but she will die with some measure of relief that he cares about her even though she could do nothing for him.
619
620[[WMG: {{Bleach}}, {{Naruto}}, and OnePiece will all have {{Downer Ending}}s.]]
621And those endings will overshadow all the fun, exciting escapism.
622* There is no One Piece treasure. They will come to the end of their journey and realize it doesn't exist.
623* Naruto will try to have a downer ending, but this downer ending will involve [[CreatorsPet Sasuke]] dying. An EsotericHappyEnding in reverse?
624** Except, unless this happens ''after'' his coming back, there's the problem that Naruto stated that he's not going to become Hokage [[AnchoredShip or advance his romantic relationship with anyone]] until he's fulfilled the promise he made. If he is unable to fulfill it...
625
626[[WMG: Eventually, all the greed and ambition in the OnePiece world will create a horrible EldritchAbomination that will consume everything beautiful and precious.]]
627Sweet dreams, kids!
628* This is exactly what the DirtyCommies predicted. Capitalism will be the end of us all!!!
629* This would make KingOfBanditJing a sequel (Jing defeats this monster in episode 2)...
630
631
632[[WMG: After the ending of {{Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle}}, because time flows differently in each dimension, the boys will come back to find...]]
633Everyone long dead. Including Sakura.
634
635[[WMG: [[AhMyGoddess Belldandy]] is mentally retarded.]]
636Think about it. She's completely oblivious to the trouble she causes Keiichi. Her entire job involves working with humans, but she has almost no idea of what humans are like. She is completely ignorant of the ways of humans and of life on Earth. She is unable to determine the motives of others, even when they're obvious. She never considers that someone might have ulterior motives or might be lying to her, even if they have before. She willingly invites a self-declared enemy (who has tried to seal her before and almost destroyed the world) into her house for lunch.
637
638Heaven knows this, which is why her contract with Keiichi was approved even though it is extremely unusual (Peorth laughed at the very thought of such a contract receiving approval).
639
640That is also why she was given a little more time on Earth even when the contract was destroyed. That's why the Almighty One was willing to look the other way when his subordinates were breaking the rules to try and restore it. Heaven simply wants her gone.
641* '''No.''' To put it simply, Belldandy isn't ''retarded'', she's ''naĆÆve''. For one example, a retarded person would have let [[Jerkass Aoshima]] rape her, thinking it was all fun and games. Belldandy probably thought that at first, but when she realized she was about to be violated, she ripped Aoshima a new one, and didn't hold back. The difference between "retarded" and "naĆÆve" is "literally being unable to know better" and just plain "not knowing better because of idealism". In Belldandy's own words, "I want to believe that everyone has a dark side, and a side of light. I want to believe in the light." That came from the Ninja Master Arc in the manga, where Urd responded with, "...And if Keiichi gets hurt because of it... What then?" "If that danger appears, then I'll protect him... with my life." She gives people the benefit of the doubt, even when that doubt is cast aside, because it's the duty of a goddess, especially a wish-granting one, to [[ForHappiness spread joy throughout Earth.]] In other words, she's not a mental retard, she's a dedicated professional whose job is to minimize suffering and maximize joy. When she realizes that someone is about to commit an evil act, she won't hesitate to stop them, but she will never go overboard. [[http://c0lb0h.deviantart.com/ -colBoh]]
642** You're probably right, but this is [[CrapsackWorld Poison Oak Epileptic Trees]].
643
644[[WMG: ''All'' character stereotypes are true.]]
645''All'' [[TheDitz ditzy]] {{Cloudcuckoolander}}s are ''literally'' mentally retarded and perhaps schizophrenic. ''All'' {{Tsundere}}s have anger-management issues and need Ritalin and perhaps some time in a straitjacket and padded cell. ''All'' HeterosexualLifePartners who are often seen together, never seem to interact with the opposite sex ([[LiteraryAgentHypothesis at least while on-camera]]), or live together are [[HoYay gay lovers]]. ''All'' people who act like {{Yandere}}s (even in a [[{{Yangire}} non-romantic sense]]) are deranged {{StepfordSmiler}}s who will soon go on an AxCrazy rampage.
646
647[[WMG: [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WDDu1BfZ4rM This song]] ([[http://www.mp3lyrics.org/e/eric-schwartz/charliesomething/ lyrics]]) describes the future of the cast of {{Peanuts}}.]]
648* My childhood just ''died.''
649
650[[WMG: [[Webcomic/{{Homestuck}} Jade]] stuffed and mounted her Grandfather.]]
651Clearly, someone did, and there doesn't seem to be anyone living on that island except for a thirteen-year-old girl and her dog. It doesn't matter what kind of awesome reality-bending powers Becquerel has; only one of them has thumbs, and OH GOD NO.
652* [[color:Green: oh noooooooooo]]
653* This has now been [[spoiler: [[http://www.mspaintadventures.com/?s=6&p=003795 confirmed]]. Oh god.]]
654* [[http://www.mspaintadventures.com/?s=6&p=003872 It's a family tradition.]] (spoilers)
655
656[[WMG: The memoirs of CiaphasCain are a heavily-fictionalized version of Caiphas' memoirs, in particular his nobler qualities and relationship with Amberley....''written by Vail herself as in-universe {{fanfic}}tion.'']]
657Amberley had a one-sided crush on the (probably incorrigible scoundrel) Cain. Her footnotes and "editing" of his memoirs have been heavily altered to include her own fantasy relationship with her crush.
658
659Because this would destroy one of the brighter, more human, and more endearing relationships between likable characters in the {{Warhammer40000}} universe, this would be awful -- and yet hilariously in keeping with its obsession with GrimDark.
660
661Please let it not be true. Damn you, brain.
662
663[[WMG: [[ItGotWorse Worse]]. CiaphasCain is a [[PersonofMassDestruction dangerous unsanctioned Psycher]].]]
664 His success is not the product of quick thinking and remarkable dumb-luck. He's subconsciously manipulating the universe with his warp powers, sacrificing the lives of others to keep himself alive without knowing.
665
666That explains Amberley's interest in him, why she wants to use him occasionally and keep a close eye on him, and why she insists he keep Jergen near him to soak up and nullify his malign influence as much as possible. She's editing his memoirs to hide this from other inquisitors and faking her side of the romance to maintain an excuse to check in on him when she has no Inquisitorial reason to. And as soon as he's outlived his usefulness, she'll be there waiting with a boltgun...
667* Cain would have to be an Omicron-Kappa psyker if he's not aware of it.
668
669[[WMG: [[LuckyStar Tsukasa]] is mentally retarded.]]
670Nothing debilitating, but when's the last time you saw a teenage girl as childish as her?
671
672[[WMG: [[Discworld/NightWatch Carcer]] was innocent, at least in the beginning.]]
673We never see him kill anybody on page, do we? If you accept that the three witnesses at the pie shop misidentified Stronginthearm's killer, that he joined the [[SecretPolice Particulars]] because it'd be safer than working against them, and that somebody else gave him the ear before he gave it to Nobby, then everything else he does could be read as him just acting in self-defense. But if that ''were'' true...[[NightmareFuel ugh]]. No.
674
675
676[[WMG: {{ET}} grows up to be the [[{{Halo}} Prophet of Truth]]]]
677Prophets canonically have centuries-long lifespans, which makes it possible for the same individual to live through the twentieth century into the 2500s. ET is an infant, which explains why he remembers none of it.
678
679[[WMG: Elliott is the Master Chief.]]
680After the events of ''ET'', they put him in witness relocation. He, being a WeirdnessMagnet, became the kid in ''FlightOfTheNavigator'', which slowed down his aging. The {{MIB}}s got to him after that and left him even more confused and angry about aliens.
681
682[[WMG: The [[{{Warhammer40000}} Orks]] are the good guys.]]
683Because that theory is just too awesome to be true.
684
685After all, Humanity is a bunch of xenophobes ruled by a dictator (read: [[ANaziByAnyOtherName space nazis]]), the Eldar are jackasses, the Dark Eldar are ''[[BeyondTheImpossible even worse]]'', the Necrons are [[OmnicidalManiac simply omnicidal]], and everything chaos-related is purely insane. The Tyrannids could be forgiven as animals running on instinct if they weren't clearly too cunning and intelligent to be [[ItCanThink mere beasts]]. The Tau ''used'' to be good guys until a certain company decided they weren't GRIMDARK enough and made them into bastards as well.
686
687Therefore, the only side left that isn't entirely, knowingly, pure hateful evil is da Orkz! Sure they'll kill you, but not because they hate your guts or because of some [[XanatosGambit secretive plot]]. They just do it because it's fun.
688* You sure this is a ''Poison Oak'' Epileptic Tree?
689** It's de absolute troof it iz! Any clear minded individual can see that the Orks are the scrappy underdogs of the40k Universe and it's rightful and natural inheritors. The Eldar had their chance and flubbed it. The Humans are too freaking [[{{Wangst}} self-pityingly Emo]] to deserve it. Chaos just wants to rape everything. The Necrons just want to destroy everything. The Tyranids just want to eat everything. And the Tau are just too naively stupid. Face it, the Universe was created for the Orks by their kind and benevolent gods, Gork and Mork. Or possibly Mork and Gork. Eitherway, it's the most perfect universe that could ever exist, constantly filled with new and interesting creatures to fight!
690
691[[WMG:[[{{TheDarkTower}} Roland's]] real plan is to topple the Dark Tower in order to {{mercy kill}} the universe.]]
692Think about it. He knows how bad things have gotten. The revised edition of ''The Gunslinger'' tells us that he's not reluctant to commit a mercy kill.
693
694[[WMG:[[{{TheDarkTower}} Roland]] has Asperger's syndrome or is otherwise non-neurotypical.]]
695That would explain a lot.
696
697[[WMG: Every theory in the [[WMG/RealLife Real Life Wild Mass Guess]] is false, foolish, and a delusion]]
698
699[[WMG: TV Tropes is JUST FOR FUN and contains no relevant content whatsoever]]
700It was all a joke used by trolls to [[TVTropesWillRuinYourLife ruin your life]].
701* ...But, [[HeroicBSOD that can't be. It just can't.]] [[BigNo NOOOOOOOOO!]] [[TearJerker I hate you. I, I-*sobbing*]]
702It's not true, it's not true...
703
704[[WMG: There are North Korean Digidestined in the Digimon 02 universe. And their lives suck.]]
705WordOfGod says every country has Digidestined. Most fanfic authors gleefully take this concept and produce season one/two recycled in France/Spain/etc. But "every country" includes North Korea.
706
707The best case scenario is that the Digidestined get into the Digital World and illegally cross the border into a safer country. The worst case scenario... Well, try not to think about it too hard.
708
709[[WMG: In IronManArmoredAdventures, Obadiah Stane is physically abusive to his daughter, if not outright sexually abusive.]]
710Whitney loves her father. She always, always wants to be with him. She is forever trying to get him to spend time with her and is willing to switch schools if that's what he wants.
711
712He has apparently gotten her expensive purses and other things in the past.
713
714But he is a CompleteMonster towards her, calling her petty and her problems shallow, having her thrown out of his building when she tries to talk to him, ignoring her constantly, and lashing out at her verbally whenever they interact.
715
716If they weren't related, then Stane would seem like an abusive boyfriend. Perhaps he sort of is.
717
718It gets worse when you realize that he has little guilt about treating her like crap and just buys her things (kickboxing lessons, clothes, purses) instead of spending time with her. Her utter devotion to him is a RelationshipWritingFumble in some episodes -- she comes across like his wife more than his daughter.
719
720The conclusion is that Obadiah is almost definitely physically abusive - he's got the personality, and all the warning signs are there - and there's a strong possibility of incest.
721
722Suddenly Whitney's fear and insane devotion make freakish sense.
723
724[[WMG:NeonGenesisEvangelion happens in [[AdolfHitler Adolf]] [[StupidJetpackHitler Hitler's]] mind]]
725* Shinji is [[{{Wangst}} Wangsty]] childhood Hitler.
726* Asuka is the current personality Hitler built to suppress his Shinji-like childhood personality. Asuka's harsh treatment of Shinji and the "German-Japanese" (aka Axis) nationality (Hitler, on the other hand, was Austrian) lampshades this.
727** How does this explain Asuka's American citizenship?
728* Gendo is the twisted fusion of his abusive father, Alois, and the dictator Hitler we knew and hated.
729* Rei / Eva 01 / Lilith / Yui are all versions of his caring mother, who then died but became the fuel to his rise to power.
730* The Eva series (and the Angels) are the powers of the Aryan Race rationalized by Hitler as [[PhysicalGod 'Gods on Earth']], and were named after his loved one, Eva Braun. The Evas were binded to limited power sources, mirroring how Germany during the Great Depression was forced to live on limited resources (unlike the other races) until the coming of Hitler. The war against the Angels is actually the construction and unification of the Aryan Race.
731* The AT Field is actually his Aryan-supremacy ideals that were portrayed as an existentialism-based force field. As explained once, he believed Aryans (Angels, Evas) have stronger darwinistic tendencies (AT Fields) than other races, which means they should be deciding the fate of Humanity.
732* Seele is the Elders of Zion living in and controlling Germany and the world as he saw it, and Gendo betraying Seele mirrors how Nazi Germany betrayed the Allies, which he believed was controlled by a Jewish Mysticism-based OmniscientCouncilOfVagueness. Hitler believed the OmniscientCouncilOfVagueness should not decide the fate of mankind.
733* Nerv personnel are all Nazis.
734* The Lance of Longinus is well, the RealLife Lance of Longinus.
735* The Impacts represent the Reichs, respecively. Adam is the Roman Empire, who first claimed all of Europe / Earth, while Lilith is the Germanic tribes, they stole Europe / Earth from Adam / Rome. The First Impact, when Lilith stole Earth from Adam? The Holy Roman Empire, or First Reich. The Second Impact represents Germany during World War One, also known as the Second Reich. After the Second Impact, what happened? CrapsackWorld, DysfunctionJunction, and [[TrueArtIsAngsty angst]], ''[[DeusAngstMachina angst]]'', '''[[ThisIsSPARTA ANGST]]'''!!! Basically, a [[{{Pun}} great depression]]. Third Impact is of course the Third Reich, the empire of Nazi Germany.
736** This also explains why Gendo betrayed Seele: Remember in the earlier explanation that Gendo is dictator Hitler while Seele is the Allies. First, the Allies agreed to give Hitler what he wanted, assimilation of Germanic countries such as Austria, in other words, the Allies agreed for a controlled Third Reich. However, Hitler betrayed the Allies, wanting a Third Reich for himself. The result: World War Two. By replacing Hitler with Gendo, the Allies with Seele, and the Third Reich with Third Impact, isn't World War Two scarily similar to End of Eva?
737* End of Evangelion is WorldWarTwo and Hitler's [[WithGreatPowerComesGreatInsanity final, violent breakdown]] (which explains the HighOctaneNightmareFuel). The dismemberment of Asuka by the MP Evas is actually the slow destruction of tough-looking Nazi Germany and the paranoid, schizophrenic, Angsty personality of Hitler haunting him again (see also: {{Downfall}}). Instrumentality, on the other hand, is Hitler's suicide: Instead of surrendering to the 'inferior races' and 'communists', he rejected the future the 'inferior races' provided, believing it is a false, corrupt happiness. Asuka returning to Shinji is actually Hitler having his tough side back after committing suicide. And the CrapsackWorld? It's actually Hell. Apparently Hitler decided for painful existential darwinism instead of 'inferior' egalitarianism.
738* So, it's [[{{Pun}} Nazi Germany Evangelion]]? Holy shit. Even the name matches.
739* To the person who came up with this: You have a sick, sick mind.
740** Forget it, man, [[ThisIsSparta This Is]] [[PoisonOakEpilepticTrees Chinatown]].
741* You know what would be almost as screwed-up as this WMG--or even more so? An AMV of {{Downfall}} using "[[SoundtrackDissonance Komm Susser Tod]]".
742** But Downfall Hitler is not much different from Shinji Ikari, isn't he?
743
744[[WMG: If Adolf Hitler is [[NeonGenesisEvangelion Shinji Ikari]], and GrandUnifyingGuesses and other [=WMGs=] say that everything takes place with Shinji involved in it, then EVERYTHING that happened had Hitler involved in it.]]
745Specifically, Hitler is Shinji, HaruhiSuzumiya and a [[Series/DoctorWho Time Lord]], Eva is Eva, his mother is Yui, and [[AxisPowersHetalia Germany]] is the [[{{Warhammer 40000}} God-Emperor of Mankind]]. Also, concerning Instrumentality, this means all of existence is just Hitler's messed-up fantasies.
746* GodwinsLaw. Just... GodwinsLaw.
747
748[[WMG:[[{{Bleach}} Ichigo]] is a figment of Orihime's imagination]]
749That explains why Ichigo became Bleach's local badass and why Orihime was impossibly MoeMoe even though she had Cosmic power that could rival that of an EldritchAbomination.
750
751The real Orihime had a {{badass}} attitude and a power that can make both HaruhiSuzumiya and God of TheBible look like average people. But she misused her power and caused her brother's death. Because of this, she rejected and 'suppressed' some of her powers. (The entire power cannot reject itself, since that would cause [[DivideByZero an unstoppable force to meet an immovable object]]).
752
753The excess (''aka'' the negative, destructive aspects), however, had to go somewhere. Ultimately, it created Ichigo. Physical Ichigo also tried to suppress the powers inside him; but when Ichigo was almost transformed into Hollow Ichigo, the ''full' potential of "Ichigo being Orihime's clone" was released, causing the {{Badass}}itude to be multiplied BeyondTheImpossible and became an independent EldritchAbomination.
754* That is just the beginning of the tale. ''Soul Society'' is a figment of Orihime's imagination.
755* Lampshaded when [[spoiler:Hollow Ichigo's power was multiplied after Ulquiorra almost kills Ichigo in the Fake Karakura Town arc, causing '''Orihime''' to panic]].
756* Oh yeah, and both Ichigo and Orihime have orange hair.
757* Further supported by Aizen's extreme interest, first in Orihime then in Ichigo, and with testing/developing their powers. Also by his claim that he has known about Ichigo 'since he was born'. Come to think of it, didn't Shinji say the same thing to Aizen when he was still a captain? What if Aizen is also a figment of Orihime's imagination like Ichigo is? [[spoiler:He did perform a similar hollow transformation before he was sealed, after all]]
758
759[[WMG: [[StarTrekEnterprise Captain Jonathan Archer]] looks nothing like Scott Bakula.]]
760[[QuantumLeap Dr Samuel Beckett]] leaped into him before the start of the series and got trapped there; that's why he never got home.
761
762Sadly, we never see the real Archer -- either what he looked like or how he would have behaved.
763
764[[WMG: All unspecified high schools in the US are the same school.]]
765Even the named ones are just different wings of the same school.
766
767The {{Animorphs}} have to put up with [[Literature/{{Twilight}} that Cullen tosser]] and those annoying HighSchoolMusical people in their class. Then they will [[RedDawn all die when the Soviets land on the lawn outside]]. [[SoleSurvivor Except Cullen]]. That's how bad it is.
768* Technically, the Animorphs could morph to birds and fly away. Those seclusive Cullens and the Musical people are still dead. [[SavedByTheBell Zach Morris]] escaped by calling out time. No one knows where The {{Glee}} Club went, though, not even the [[ThatsSoRaven local psychic]].
769** I would pay to see this movie.
770** Seconded. Isn't this section supposed to be for theories you ''don't'' want to happen?
771
772[[WMG: JamesBond is a [[Series/DoctorWho Time-Lord]]]]
773That's why he never dies and appears to periodically regenerate.
774
775[[WMG: JamesBond is The Master and is corrupting MI6 from the inside.]]
776
777[[WMG: JamesBond is a code-name give to anyone who has the 007 designation]]
778That's why his appearance periodically changes and M, Q and Monnypenny never comment on it: they are perfectly aware that the previous Bond has died and a new sucker has been given the job.
779* M, Q, and Moneypenny are ALSO code names given to whomsoever holds the position, which is why the name stays the same whilst the people change.. and in M's case they even change gender..
780* The old {{Casino Royale}} from the 1960s used the multiples theory. Count the Bonds!
781
782[[WMG: [[{{Bleach}} Aizen]] [[LukeIAmYourFather is Orihime's father or created her]].]]
783This would explain how Aizen knows about Orihime's power.
784
785Ichigo didn't leak his reiatsu into her for her to gain such powers; she's a RealityWarper, and Aizen's shikai makes him a MasterOfIllusion. And Aizen built an artificial sky in Hueco Mundo.
786
787It also explains how Aizen has also being keeping tabs on Ichigo, the abusive history of Orihime, why Orihime lacks confidence, and why she ''didn't'' destroy the Hogyoku.
788
789If she was merely created by Aizen, then she would have been his eyes and ears for much of Ichigo's life. Aizen would have considered himself perfectly reasoned in abducting her to Hueco Mundo, and [[MeaningfulName her name would be even more meaningful]] -- "Orihime" is Japanese for "Weaving Princess", and Aizen's aim is to "stand on top of the heavens" as in the Tanabata tale. Ighigo would be Hikoboshi.
790
791It is canon that Aizen has been running a XanatosRoulette around Ichigo. If he can do that, then he can do this.
792
793[[WMG: [[{{Bleach}} Aizen]] is Ichigo's father.]]
794The theory is detailed in [[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5751513/1/The_Master_Puppet this fanfic]].
795
796Can't. UNTHINK.
797* Need some [[BrainBleach Brain]] [[{{Pun}} Bleach]]?
798* If you can't unthink, why not use [[NineteenEightyFour Doublethink]]?
799
800[[WMG: The extra-galactic enemy [[StarWars Emperor Palpatine]] may or may not have been building TheEmpire to resist in the [[StarWarsExpandedUniverse expanded Universe]] was ''[[WarhammerFortyThousand the Tyranids!]]'']]
801
802The StarWars galaxy was the one they ate before heading to the 40k Milky Way.
803* Apparently, he was protecting against the [[ProudWarriorRace Yuuzhan Vong]]. That, come to think of it, is [[CombatSadomasochist almost as bad]].
804
805[[WMG: Webcomic/{{Freefall}} and Webcomic/{{Jack}} take place in the same universe, and Dr Bowman is a pseudonym used by Dr Kane.]]
806Florence Ambrose is Central. She was killed by Mr. Kornada; because she felt guilty about being part of Sam's criminal activities, she went to purgatory and re-incarnated on earth in time to grow up with Jack.
807* Or Florence is Jill. Nothing else needs to change.
808* The aliens in the Jack arc "Debts" are what the human colonists on Jean evolve into after they are cut off when human civilisation falls on earth. They know what happened to the humans of earth, and that's why they hate furries.
809* Sam in Webcomic/{{Freefall}} is [[Main/HPLovecraft Nyarlathotep]], sowing anarchy and madness amongst those Earthmen foolish enough to plough the stars in preparation for the coming of his dark masterĀ¦
810
811
812[[WMG: The entire plot of Webcomic/{{Digger}} is, as Digger initially feared, a hallucination Digger is having.]]
813She has been poisoned by cave gas. She tunnels slower and slower in smaller and smaller circles, dying by inches, miles from the sun.
814
815[[WMG: The entire plot of Webcomic/{{Digger}} is Ed's hallucination.]]
816After decades in exile, Ed has finally snapped and imagined a wombat about his daughter's age who has come from a far away world to befriend him as he sits completely, totally alone in his cave, talking to himself as he slowly starves to death, his passing un-mourned by the world.
817
818[[WMG: Jhalm is right]]
819Webcomic/{{Digger}} is a pawn of evil, and the Shadowchild is an EldritchAbomination from outside of time.
820
821[[WMG: All women have VaginaDentata. No exceptions. They're just biding their time.]]
822* Well then, Have I Mentioned I Am [[{{Asexuality}} Asexual]] Today?
823* You think that will help? The toothed part of the vagina is capable of detaching itself from its female host and roaming independently seeking prey for up to seven days an month. Women have an AncientConspiracy to hide this, involving an elaborate and implausible cover story called "[[WomensMysteries menstruation]]". They're out there as we speak, lurking in the shadows. They are dexterous and clever enough to pick locks, can squeeze thought the smallest hole, have access to [[HyperspaceIsAScaryPlace a parallel horror dimension that allows them to travel instantaneously, unseen]], the entrances to which are hidden in the folds in '''[[ParanoiaFuel your]]''' shower-curtain and blankets, and they can '''''[[DeathFromAbove fly]].'''''
824* [[ItGotWorse It gets worse.]] You know how some nations are anthropomorphised as female? That's right, some ''[[CountryMatters countries]]'' have toothed genitalia. Look at the evidence: Germany, the ''father''land, one of the few male nations: In the forties it tried to have its wicked way with the Soviet Union (the ''mother''land), the UK (Britannia, female) and the United States (Columbia, female) and as a direct result permanently lost the ability to project power and penetrate other countries. Thankfully, after exhaustive testing involving feeding small, unpopular nations to the United States we have determined where in the US the teeth are. Richmond: That's right people, [[{{Pun}} Virginia Dentata!]]
825* Of course! That explains so much! North Carolina! South Carolina! Georgia! They're there to stop it biting of Florida!
826** ... that may have been the most epic thing I've ever read. Also, this troper proposes that what uninitiated women describe as a menstrual period is simply the toothed device being shed (with the requisite bleeding) and exiting the body in the night to wreak havoc.
827*** Female troper here. We bleed because of the teeth physically detaching themselves from our bodies. This is also the reason why some women claim to have cramps; they're more sensitive to the process and thus they experience more pain. The bleeding also serves as a handy deterrent to our lovers. It means they don't lose their genitalia during the period of time that the teeth are most active, because we usually refrain from sexual activity at that time. [[NightmareFuel Of course, now you know all this, your genitalia will have to be removed. I hope you gents own chastity belts!]]
828[[WMG: In revenge for the above, all men have evolved spines on their penises.]]
829Similar to real-life big cats (cougars, lions, and tigers).
830* ''Big'' cats? ''All'' cats. That Cute little kitty of yours? Yeah, if it's a tom, it's got barbs. Changes the tone of ''TopCat'' somewhat, but not as disturbing as [[MockTheWeek Frankie Boyle's]] comments on the subject of [[BrainBleach Feline acquired immunodeficiency syndrome and Topcat]]. on the subject of the escalating arms-race all females are working on clitoris bones like squirrels, males are working on developing baculems, females are working on [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spotted_Hyena#Physical_description pseudopenis's]] and males ultimately aiming for [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Traumatic_insemination Traumatic Insemination.]] Unfortunately all those [[WondrousLadiesRoom ladies-bathroom meeting to develop secret weapons]] have ''[[ItGotWorse already]]'' developed a ray-gun to turn any species sexual relationship into one resembling an [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anglerfish#Reproduction Angler Fish.]]
831** Except females still has the pain of pregnancy, and males have denser muscles and can produce a million sperm for each, so males are still superior (Alpha male anyone?). Unless females evolve into hermaphrodites and [[TheEndOfTheWorldAsWeKnowIt wipe the male race altogether]].......
832
833[[WMG:The Genitalia Arms Race will be the death of humanity.]]
834After the fanged vaginas and spine-ed penises, all hell breaks loose. [[HighOctaneNightmareFuel The vaginal canals will be full of unspeakable combinations of sawblades, churning gears, razor-sharp fangs and sundry other Freudian horrors,]] [[NoKillLikeOverkill all while flowing with boiling acid and the stench of a million graves]] [[{{Alien}} and spawning impregnating facehuggers]] and {{Eldritch Abomination}}s. [[ThisIsADrill The penises will be covered with drills, spikes, hammers, nukes, high-calibre gatling cannons,]] [[CombatTentacles mechanical]] [[NaughtyTentacles tentacles]], [[KillItWithFire and ejaculate flaming napalm]] [[ThePowerOfRock all while playing heavy rock and roll]] [[TengenToppaGurrenLagann and powered by Spiral Energy]]. [[BiblicalMotifs The vagina of that woman shall come in a day when he looketh not for her, and in an hour that he is not aware of,]] [[NowThatsUsingYourTeeth And shall cut his penis asunder, and appoint him his portion with the hypocrites.]] [[ScreamsLikeALittleGirl There shall be weeping and gnashing of vagina-teeth.]]
835* That sounds...[[FetishFuel pretty exciting]].
836
837[[WMG: Your Senator or elected representative is a porn star.]]
838 And not the good kind.
839* Note that, if you live in Massachusetts, you have a senator who posed nude for Playgirl.
840
841[[WMG: The [[DoctorDoom Doombots]] have formed a HiveMind.]]
842The original [[DoctorDoom Victor Von Doom]] died decades ago and has not come back. No-one noticed.
843
844[[WMG: Dreamworks's ''{{Robots}}'' takes place in the same universe as the ''{{Terminator}}'' fillms.]]
845 Looks like John Connor wasn't ''quite'' good enough.
846
847[[WMG: Pixar's ''{{Cars}}'' takes place in the ''{{Terminator}}'' 'verse after Skynet worked out how to interface with Sat-Navs.]]
848
849[[WMG: ''{{Cars}}'' takes place in the universe of [[MaximumOverdrive Maximum Overdrive]].]]
850
851[[WMG: The Game is a sentient non-corporeal being.]]
852 Every time you lose The Game, it gets a little stronger...
853
854[[WMG: The Game was invented by [[Main.HPLovecraft Nyarlathotep]].]]
855Every time you lose The Game, Cthulhu gets a little closer to waking and eating the earth.
856
857[[WMG: Every time you lose The Game, God kills a puppy.]]
858
859[[WMG: [[Series/DoctorWho The Doctor]] is ''not'' a Time Lord.]]
860He's just a homeless man squatting in a phone booth, and hallucinating crazy adventures in time and space because he's off his meds.
861* The DoctorWhoExpandedUniverse novel ''The Blue Angel'' (which can be read as a screenplay [[http://www.iriswildthyme.thiswaydown.org/angelPlay.html here]]) is basically this, except he's got a rather impressive home and it's not as bad as all that. He's got friends who care about him, for one thing. But still, he's just crazy and doesn't go on any adventures but [[ThroughTheEyesOfMadness hallucinates them when he's off his meds]]; and he is, er, AmbiguouslyHuman.[[hottip:* : Considering that his mum behaves like a stereotypical JewishMother complete with {{Ruritania}}n accent, and also taking note of how [[HoYay cuddly]] he and [[HeterosexualLifePartners Fitz]] are and that he listens to classic Hollywood soundtracks while bustling around the kitchen, he seems to be ambiguously [[AmbiguouslyJewish several]] [[AmbiguouslyGay things]]. If [[AmbiguouslyBrown he weren't so pale]], he could [[GottaCatchEmAll collect the whole set]].]]
862* ...Okay, that is depressing.
863
864[[WMG: Film/GroundhogDay ends with Phil going insane]]
865The despair of going back to zero, or rather to 6:59 AM on February 2nd, after his perfect day is too much for him. Trapped in the time loop forever, hearing "I Got You Babe" on the clock radio again, Phil just gave in to delusions.
866
867[[WMG: The Poison Oak Epileptic Trees are the only correct {{Wild Mass Guess}}es.]]
868It's a CrapsackWorld, after all...
869
870[[WMG: [[NeonGenesisEvangelion Shinji Ikari]] is God.]]
871..in RealLife. Everyone was redeuced to LCL and made equal, but Shinji retained his identity. It is obvious that in most cases the most recognized people are worshipped as Gods. Shinji, being the only person alive, began to rename the world under himself. Shinji choking Asuka is actually either him preventing any rival to his position, or forcing her to become his new [[GoGoEnslavement slave]]. Meanwhile, Giant Naked Rei fell to the ground, spilling pieces of Adam onto the LCL. Without food, Shinji was forced to suck juices out of the LCL, and accidentally sucked the souls from it, giving him more power over his AT Field to the point that he also absorbed Adam from the former Giant Naked Rei corpse, granting him both AT Field and Anti-AT Field control, causing him to became a RealityWarper and therefore created a more mediocre reality: RealLife. The live action sequence in End of Evangelion? It's actually a foreshadowing of Shinji creating RealLife.
872* God is Angsty. That explains Hitler.
873** And the Old Testament.
874
875[[WMG: The last Mega Man game will end with Dr. Wily winning.]]
876It's the only explanation that makes sense.
877
878[[WMG: Mega Man will become [[WhyDontYaJustShootHim Zeroth Law Compliant]] and [[BeastWars slag Wily]].]]
879[[MyDeathIsJustTheBeginning Wily's death]] will then release [[PersonOfMassDestruction Zero]]. [[BobAndGeorge The Cataclysm]] ensues.
880
881[[WordOfGod Inafune]] was [[LyingCreator lying.]]
882
883[[WMG: In the event that there is a CatcherInTheRye movie, [[Literature/{{Twilight}} Robert Pattinson]] will play Holden Caulfield.]]
884He's popular right now and good at the brooding-character type, and so directors would want to tap him to portray Holden's teenage angst. It's only a matter of time, fellow tropers...
885* For half the world, that wouldn't make CatcherInTheRye any worse.
886* Truth, but for those who enjoyed the book, this might be terrifying -- perhaps even more than the idea of the movie being made at all, which was expressly against J.D. Salinger's wishes. And for those who didn't... well, they wouldn't want a movie anyway, would they?
887** Given how English classes have been substituting TheFilmOfTheBook for the book proper a lot these days? Those who distrust the book will ''love'' it!
888
889[[WMG: [[MetalGearSolid Sunny Gurlukovitch's]] odd personality was not caused by the Patriots' conditioning]]
890It was caused by Solid Snake having pumped her pregnant mother full of tranquilizers in ''[=MGS2=].''
891
892Once [[Tropers/{{Psyclone}} this troper]] linked the two events together, he could think of nothing else. WhatTheHellPlayer indeed.
893
894[[WMG: An oil well in Saudi Arabia just struck a vein of HighOctaneNightmareFuel.]]
895It's one of the largest fuel sources ever discovered. It burns almost 95% cleaner than standard petroleum, so it won't take long for the big oil companies to start marketing it. Unfortunately, it still leaves exhaust, and for a look at its effects...well, just see ''BatmanBegins''.
896* That explains the Jihad.
897* So, kinda like [[spoiler: the whole Ghost Rock thing in Deadlands]]?
898
899[[WMG: It's no coincidence that the child who plays ForrestGump Jr. is the same child actor that appears in TheSixthSense.]]
900Forrest dies before the last scene in ForrestGump. Jenny gave him HIV, and he died. His son is sitting there by himself waiting for the bus as his dad's ghost haunts him.
901
902[[WMG: The reason the [[TengenToppaGurrenLagann Anti-Spirals]] hate Spiral races (humans) has nothing to do with the destruction of the universe.]]
903Anti-Spirals hate us because we ''stink''. Literally.
904
905[[TheMatrix Agent Smith]] and [[{{Film/Transformers}} Megatron]] hate humans for the same reason.
906->''"I hate this place. This zoo. This prison. This reality, whatever you want to call it, I can't stand it any longer. It's the smell, if there is such a thing. I feel saturated by it. I can taste your stink and every time I do, I fear that I've somehow been infected by it."''\
907-- Agent Smith from ''TheMatrix''
908-> ''"Disgusting!"''\
909-- Megatron, after noticing some nearby humans beside him
910* Also, the stronger a human's Body Odor is, the more likely he is to generate more Spiral Power. Hence why in an episode Yoko complained about Kamina and Simon being stinky. The inverse of this is also what caused post-timeskip Rossiu, perfume became available due to progress, and being the Chancellor, he used too much of it. The Anti-Spirals are total snobs who despised the stench of hope so much they turned themselves into a data overmind represented by a CosmicEntity avatar and vowed that anyone who stank should be [[{{Warhammer 40000}} exterminatused]]. Since they are colossal assholes lacking the colossal odor of an asshole, they made up the entire propaganda of Spiral Nemesis since they think that stinky lifeforms should not expand into space and remain as downtrodden ignorant ghetto-boys unless they perform mind uploading and become assimilated in their data overmind. The really horrible thing about this is that this is also TruthInTelevision if Spiral Power is taken as a metaphor for sex/evolution, after all there's this one word: pheromones. And we Real Life Homo Sapiens Sapiens, for inventing perfume, showering a lot and repressing the sense of smell in a manner similar to how an [[NineteenEightyFour Orwellian state]] would repress a very notorious thoughtcriminal, this time turned UpToEleven (Transhumanist [[TheSingularity Singularitarians]] can even take it BeyondTheImpossible, with them being obsessed with mind uploading and living as electronic data overminds like the original Anti-Spirals), are becoming the Anti-Spirals themselves.
911
912[[WMG: [[NineteenEightyFour Big Brother]] is watching you.]]
913It's true.
914* Though not quite as in the book. In the novel, the Goldstein Document serves as a means for the Thought Police to identify potentially troublesome Outer Party members; there are those who read it and ''accept'' Party rule. The others, [[{{Room101}} however...]]. In RealLife, Nineteen-Eighty-Four ''itself'' is the Goldstein Document. Having read the book and understood this, you will now attract the attention of the Thought Police. ''Who will come for you if you think about their existence''.
915** Worse: Big Brother [[MemeticMutation is watching you masturbate]], and is posting pictures of it over the Internet. [[EndOfEvangelion I'm. So. Fucked. Up.]]
916
917[[WMG: [[AnimalFarm Boxer]] was reincarnated into a human after he was sent to the knackers.]]
918Which one, you ask? [[{{Naruto}} Rock Lee]].
919
920It's too perfect not to work: They both want to work hard. Both are handicapped in common arts that their peers have mastered but beat them all in physical strength and determination.
921
922Boxer wouldn't have gone to Sugercandy Mountain because Napoleon told him it didn't exist, and so God chose to re-incarnate him. To do this, God sent his soul to a place where reincarnation is commonplace -- a Buddist Japan. Either because he wanted to punish him ironically for his loyalty to Animalism or because he didn't want him to suffer at the hands of more humans (or Pigs), he chose to reincarnate him as a human being. Since Boxer originally wasn't a human, Lee can't use Gen or Ninjitsu; but his former Clydsdale soul makes him the perfect Tyjitsu master. The whole "Alcohol makes him stronger" thing could be an ironic twist from God as a reference to the seven commandments.
923
924
925[[WMG: SherlockHolmes is Dracula.]]
926
927[[WMG: If you beat VideoGame/{{Tetris}}, then you win at life.]]
928
929Especially when recent Japanese versions of the game go beyond NintendoHard to BeyondTheImpossible. In that case, [[AWinnerIsYou a winner]] is [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jwC544Z37qo Jin8]].
930
931[[WMG: [[CodeLyoko Odd Della Robbia]] is a terrorist.]]
932
933This might involve some involved explanation:
934
935In the CodeLyoko novels, one bit that is known but not yet expanded on in English is that the terrorist organization trying to reclaim the supercomputer, The Green Phoenix, has information on Odd, and only Odd, on file. Why do they have this?
936
937Simple. Odd's been feeding them information the entire time. His carefree personality was a lie to get the gang to trust him and think him harmless. The "file" isn't just information, but a mission briefing. The only reason he's allowed the Warriors to live is so he can use their abilities to track down more of what TGP wants. When they've outlived their usefulness...
938
939[[WMG: [[{{Nirvana}} "Smells Like Teen Spirit"]] was hard to decipher because Kurt Cobain recorded it with a gun in his mouth.]]
940There is a logic to it. Moon logic is still logic.
941* Teen spirit ''stinks''. Literally, and it's an understatement. Just go to [[CrapsackWorld Middle School or High School]] and you'll smell the TruthInTelevision. This is also why This Troper is such a massively nihilistic NietzscheWannabe, being a nietzsche wannabe decreases the [[TengenToppaGurrenLagann Spiral]] stench of the teen spirit.
942
943[[WMG: [[MegaManBattleNetwork Netto]] has [[SoapOperaDisease HBD]].]]
944Considering [[spoiler: his twin brother]] had it, this could happen.
945* That would make an ''awesome'' (albeit [[TearJerker deperssing]]) fanfic. Hats off to you!
946
947[[WMG: In any given work, -insert character name here- was DeadAllAlong or in a coma; everyone else was just representations of his/her psyche.]]
948Variations of this theory come up in many fandoms. Someone always has to be in a coma or dead, and everyone and everything else in the story is just their id/ego/superego/lust/childhood dreams personified.
949
950Even a DownerEnding is preferable to this WMG. When this WMG is true, it turns the entire plot into AllJustADream filler. It also kicks you in the teeth if you happened to [[EnsembleDarkHorse li]][[PerverseSexualLust ke]] any of the characters other than the one having the DyingDream because they're not really [[ShaggyDogStory real or important]] to anyone or anything in their universe -- not even the character who dreamed them, since [[ForgottenFallenFriend they are just a dream.]] It makes [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome every]] [[CrowningMomentOfHeartWarming single]] [[TearJerker thing]] [[OneTruePairing in]] [[EnsembleDarkHorse the]] [[TheScrappy story]] [[ShootTheShaggyDog null and void.]]
951
952For proof of this concept, see StElsewhere. ''Please!''

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