Line #3 Roleplay/NoMatterWhatHappensIStillWontBecomeAnAnimeCharacter


1	->''[[KidHero When I was 13]], [[{{Excalibur}} a sword threw itself up out of a lake]]. [[MundaneSolution I handed it in to Lost and Found]].''
2
3	[[AC:''No Matter What Happens, I Still Won't Become An Anime Character'' would like to apologize that it is still, in fact, not an anime. As an apology, please accept this Website/TVTropes page.]]
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5	The UsefulNotes/{{JSDF}} has been in a constant battle with [[TheTropeFormerlyKnownAsX The Monster Formerly Known As]] Franchise/{{Godzilla}} for an unspecified amount of time. MagicalGirl duels are a [[TheUnmasquedWorld semi-regular occurrence]]. {{Ancient Conspirac\|y}}ies [[GambitPileup make move and counter-move against each other]] in the dark of night. At least one AlienInvasion is [[{{Backstory}} implied to have happened in the not-so-distant past]]. [[{{Troperiffic}} This is the world of]] [[CapitalLettersAreMagic Anime]], and don't you ever forget it!
6
7	But in the middle of it all, one unfortunately-pink-haired girl [[IJustWantToBeNormal just really, ]]''[[IJustWantToBeNormal really ]]''[[IJustWantToBeNormal wants to have a ]]'''[[IJustWantToBeNormal normal ]]'''[[IJustWantToBeNormal life]].
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9	''[[https://forums.sufficientvelocity.com/threads/9848 No Matter What Happens, I Still Won't Become An Anime Character]]'' is a ForumQuest that's kind of an anti-roleplaying game, where [[InvertedTrope the objective is to avoid any and all plot progression]]. PlayerCharacter Kokoro Sakura ([[IronicName yes, really]]) [[CosmicPlaything has had the universe trying to rope her into one adventure or another for her entire life]], but her [[SeenItAll encyclopedic]] [[CrazyPrepared knowledge]] [[ProperlyParanoid of]] [[GenreSavvy tropes]] has allowed her to [[RefusalOfTheCall unfailingly thwart its efforts]] thus far.
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11	Now, however, there are 10 weeks left until Sakura's [[Dangerous16thBirthday sixteenth birthday]], which has her very, ''very'' worried...
12
13	The story was cancelled and then rebooted [[https://forums.sufficientvelocity.com/threads/no-matter-what-happens-i-still-wont-become-an-anime-character-for-real-this-time.20591/ here]]. It is currently on potentially-permanent hiatus.
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15	----
16	! This story provides examples of:
17
18	!!Tropes that are {{Exploited\|Trope}}:
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20	* The {{Aver\|tedTrope}}sion of AdultsAreUseless. When [[spoiler:[[TheMafia mafia]] goons show up]] on Day 4, Sakura [[spoiler:calmly tells the teachers, the student council, and the police, then sits down and drinks her coffee like nothing's happening]]. Kumiko's reaction is priceless.
21	-->''[[spoiler:Kumiko hasn't drunk any of her coffee yet. It pulls free easily from numb hands as I flop back into my seat, it's taste bitter, but sweet [sic].]]''
22	* AlwaysInClassOne + IdiotHero + TheLancer: Sakura decides to set up Kiyoshi Kita to be the protagonist in her place, because he fits these tropes. [[spoiler:Then abandons the plan when circumstances change.]]
23	* KnightTemplar: If all else fails, yell "HEATHEN!" and duck. The Homeroom Teacher Who Is Definitely Not A Nun With A Sword will take care of it.
24
25	!!Tropes that are {{Defied\|Trope}}
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27	* The overarching goal is to repeatedly defy TheCallKnowsWhereYouLive until it gives up.
28	* CrashIntoHello
29	-->''I maintain a careful, arms-length distance from every other person around me, keeping an eye out at doors, junctions and broom closets on the off-chance someone is about to burst out from there on a collision course.''
30	* DreamingOfThingsToCome: Upon waking up on Day 4, Sakura makes sure to immediately forget the dream she had the previous night.
31	* MentorMascot: Sakura has turned away 17 of them as of the beginning of the story.
32	* TemptingFate: Members of the Red Shirt Gang never, ''ever'' keep family portraits in their pockets.
33	* ThroughHisStomach: Sakura always packs a lunch exactly large enough for herself, so that "nothing can get mysteriously offered in any direction."
34
35	!!Tropes that are {{Invoked\|Trope}}
36
37	* OffTheRails: [[FourthWallObserver Sakura]]'s main goal is to invoke it InUniverse.
38	* PlotArmor
39	** Sakura makes a point of [[NominalImportance learning the names]] of members of the Red Shirt Gang in order to increase their chances of survival.
40	** Sakura encourages Hideaki to ask out the MysteriousTransferStudent in the hopes of getting him into a "romance subplot," because [[DoubleStandardAbuseFemaleOnMale when the guy in a relationship gets beat up]], [[{{Slapstick}} there is never permanent damage]]. [[spoiler:[[WrongGenreSavvy The plan backfires catastrophically.]]]]
41
42	!!Tropes that are {{Deconstructed\|Trope}}
43
44	* ComedicSociopathy: When [[spoiler:The Transfer Student "comedically" overreacts to Hideaki's advances]] just off-screen, we hear no less than ''three'' explosions in quick succession. [[spoiler:We later learn that [[KilledOffForReal this was fatal to him]], and Sakura solemnly adds his name to her Red Shirt Memorial web page.]]
45	* FantasyKitchenSink: The universe is throwing every fantasy related plot starter at her, from mentor mascots to special swords appearing, to ominous dream to monsters causing trouble in her neighborhood. The defensive capabilities of the school, show the results of this trop as well
46	-->''I...look up at the incredibly bland exterior of concrete, barbed wire and sandbags that make up my current choice of high school. Because all the other ones closed down...There's a few craters here and there but honestly it's lasted the longest out of any school I've ever been to.''
47	* NegativeContinuity
48	-->''Completely wrecking a classroom first thing on a Monday morning is the type to make the Student Council'' irritated; ''they can only mysteriously repair any and all damaged faculty buildings over the weekends, after all. The construction teams take not being seen as a point of professional pride... we think. Having never seen them or anything.''
49	* {{RedShirt}} / RedShirtArmy: In addition to literally wearing red shirts, members of the Red Shirt Gang know ''exactly'' how short their life expectancy is. They post (extremely jumpy) lookouts whenever they gather in a group. Many have large numbers of scars from the times they not-''quite''-died. Some seem to be in a perpetual state of shock, whimpering and mumbling to themselves.
50	* '''The entire premise of the work itself''' is deconstructed in the [[AlternateUniverse non-canon]] VideoGame/SpecOpsTheLine[=-=]inspired ending.
51	-->''Amidst the smoking rubble and twisted steel, her boots crunched against the broken glass. Heresy, mind-control, mecha, magic... everything had brought down everything in the end. A broken equilibrium that could never have been met...''
52	-->''"Well?" The figure asked, regarding the ruined vista spread out before them. Fire, smoke, rubble, water. An entire city with shirts painted red. "[[ArmorPiercingQuestion Do you feel like a normal person, yet?]]"''
53
54	!!Tropes that are (merely) {{Lampshade\|Hanging}}d
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56	* TheAllSolvingHammer: Jumping out the window, interpretive dance, and ''especially'' pepper spray.
57	-->(While hanging out with allies): ''You're not sure, but you could probably do something with pepper spray in this situation.''
58	* {{Cloudcuckoolander}}: The literature teacher. Emphasis on ''Cloud''.
59	-->Literature Teacher: '''''CLOOOOUDS.'''''
60	* DuctTapeForEverything: ''Because it's duct tape.''
61	* DramaticWind: In Day 2 Part 8, and again in Day 3 Part 7. Both times, they're indoors but with a conveniently-broken window and open door to provide the cross-breeze.
62	* EmpathicEnvironment
63	-->''From a nearby open window, the Piano Club unintentionally starts providing a mournful piano solo.''
64	* PaperThinDisguise: The People We Suspect Are Secretly Pigeons. Evidently seen through by Sakura (and, given the word "we," presumably others?), since she's the narrator.
65
66	!!Tropes that are [[PlayingWithATrope Played With]] in other ways:
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68	* CrazyEnoughToWork: {{ZigZagg\|ingTrope}}ed in Sakura putting a bucket over her head [[NonSequitur to avoid being accosted by Kumiko]]. [[ChewbaccaDefense It works]], but also prevents her from plugging her ears to avoid learning Kumiko's name when the teacher calls it. And then [[GRatedDrug the fumes from the cleaning chemicals that used to be in the bucket get her high]]. And [[FinaglesLaw turn her hair even pinker]].
69
70	!!Tropes that are just Played Straight
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72	* AscendedGlitch: On one occasion, the [[GameMaster GM]] accidentally called Hideaki "Hideyoshi." By the time anyone noticed, so many players had already gone along with the new name that the GM decided to have Sakura misremember it too.
73	* BigWhat: In Day 3 Part 6, by [[spoiler:Kumiko]] when she learns that [[spoiler:Sakura ''already knew'' that something big and terrible was going to happen on her sixteenth birthday]]. Accompanied by FlippingTheTable.
74	* BreakTheScientist
75	-->''After Homeroom, the morning session is Science; which consists of a physicist standing in front of the blackboard and crying.''
76	* CrapsackWorld: An inevitable result of {{Deconstruct\|edTrope}}ing FantasyKitchenSink. [[Film/PacificRim Kaiju are coming out of a portal in the pacific]], one of the teachers at Sakura's school is constantly hiding a sword, the student council has brainwashed students called drones, and redshirts bite it by the dozen everyday.
77	* DarkerAndEdgier: The GM originally categorized it as "comedy," but it didn't take long for the players to notice that they'd inadvertently made Sakura pretty clearly sociopathic, and that in her all-encompassing desire to be normal, she's missing the forest for the trees.
78	%%%%* DeconstructorFleet
79	* EverythingTryingToKillYou: The mafia, black holes, name whatever you would like. Literally everything has tried to kill Sakura, or at least will try to kill her in the future.
80	* FlippingTheTable: [[spoiler: Kumiko]] uses a table to express her shock that [[spoiler: Sakura knows her 16th birthday is an event flag.]]
81	* FourthWallObserver: Sakura, her parents, and the Red Shirt Gang are all aware of event flags and such. It's part of the premise.
82	* HiveMind: The student council drones all think and act alike [[Franchise/StarTrek Borg]]-style.
83	* HumongousMecha: Giant robots are mentioned in passing a couple of times. Sakura is ''definitely'' falling into one of their cockpits.
84	* {{Irony}}: For somebody trying to avoid darn well every plot-starter for every genre she can think of, Sakura just landed headfirst into the one genre she never considered: the FantasyKitchenSink AcademyOfAdventure. If she just picked something, the world would stop throwing every genre in the book at her and her days would be relatively average if not for the odd call every now and then, according to standard genre conventions. In a world where abnormal is the norm, she's actually standing smack-dab in the middle of her world's equivalent of a SliceOfLife -- the one genre she likely would have wanted to accept.
85	* JapaneseDelinquents: From a certain point of view, the redshirts look like these because of their pompadours.
86	* KilledOffForReal: So many redshirts. A few even died permanently on screen.
87	%%%* LiteralMetaphor: The occasional spring in Sakura's step.
88	* LocalHangout: The Red Shirt Gang hangs out at the bike sheds at lunch, [[JustifiedTrope because nothing plot-related ever happens there]].
89	* LoopholeAbuse: Since WordOfGod says Sakura won't be getting any more pepper spray before the end of the quest, some players have taken to discussing the feasibility of having her buy hot peppers to make her own.
90	* OverlyLongName:
91	** The school: St. Mary's Coed We-Swear-We-Didn't-Build-It-On-A-Hellmouth-This-Time School for The Vaguely Catholic Militant Church.
92	** Kumiko (see Characters page).
93	** The Homeroom Teacher Who Is Definitely Not A Nun With A Sword.
94	** The Rich Girl With Curls Who Owns Most Of Europe.
95	** The Small Dog That Wandered In One Day.
96	** The People We Suspect Are Secretly Pigeons.
97	** The Whips, Cowboy Hats and Archaeology Teacher.
98	* RoyalBrat: The Rich Girl With Curls Who Owns Most Of Europe also owns a lot of snobbery.
99	* ShoutOut:
100	** Apparently, they really ''didn't'' [[Series/BuffyTheVampireSlayer build the school on a hellmouth]] this time.
101	** Sakura doesn't ride bikes because they "[[Film/ETTheExtraTerrestrial have an irritating habit of trying to fly to the moon whenever I crest the hill]]."
102	** [[VisualNovel/HatofulBoyfriend The People We Suspect Are Secretly Pigeons]] have a table in the cafeteria.
103	** The phrase, "[[Franchise/TheHitchhikersGuideToTheGalaxy life, the universe and everything]]" is mentioned multiple times.
104	** There is a [[Franchise/IndianaJones Whips, Cowboy Hats and Archaeology Teacher]].
105	** Every day begins with the declaration, "[[VideoGame/TheLegendOfZeldaMajorasMask Dawn of the nth Day]]." On Fridays, "24 hours remain" is added for good measure.
106	** Sakura sees TV news reporting on [[Film/PacificRim a dimensional portal opening up in the Pacific]], and [[SeenItAll her reaction is to be mildly annoyed that her next shipment of pepper spray will probably be delayed]].
107	* TastesLikeFriendship: [[spoiler:Sakura eventually offers a ''very'' tentative olive branch to Kumiko in the form of coffee.]]
108	* TooAwesomeToUse: Sakura started with 20 doses of pepper spray. Still hasn't used it once.

Context Roleplay / NoMatterWhatHappensIStillWontBecomeAnAnimeCharacter