Line #96 Quotes/TheBigRottenApple


1	-> ''"New York is baffling in that it’s a city that prides itself on being an absolute shithole. I say there’s nothing good here and people are'' proud ''of that! It’s overpriced and it’s overpopulated and it stinks like piss and comics film specials here, and they all open with a joke about "yeah I spent $8,000 a month for nine square feet" and you go "why don’t you leave here, why do people stay here?" but... Unfortunately this is where comedy works, where people are the most miserable. I’d rather be filming a special on a beach in Costa Rica at a tiki bar right now but they don’t need comedians, they’re already smiling. They’re already happy naturally. So that’s why I’m doing a special here, cuz it’s the last place I want to fucking'' be."
2	-->-- '''Creator/DougStanhope''', "No Refunds"
3
4	->''"You don't understand, there is a maniac trying to kill us!"''\
5	''"Welcome to New York."''
6	-->-- ''Film/FridayThe13thPartVIIIJasonTakesManhattan''
7
8	->''Broken glass everywhere ''\
9	''People pissing on the stairs, you know they just don't care ''\
10	''I can't take the smell, I can't take the noise ''\
11	''Got no money to move out, I guess I got no choice ''\
12	''Rats in the front room, roaches in the back ''\
13	''Junkies in the alley with the baseball bat ''\
14	''I tried to get away, but I couldn't get far ''\
15	''Cause a man with a tow-truck repossessed my car ''
16	-->-- '''Music/GrandmasterFlashAndTheFuriousFive''', "The Message"
17
18	->''"But Marge, New York is a hellhole! And you know how I feel about hellholes!"''
19	-->-- '''Homer Simpson''', ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'', "The City of New York vs. Homer Simpson"
20
21	->''Don't you know the crime rate is going up, up, up, up, up ''\
22	''To live in this town you must be tough, tough, tough, tough, tough! ''\
23	''You got rats on the west side ''\
24	''Bed bugs uptown ''\
25	''What a mess this town's in tatters I've been shattered.''
26	-->-- '''Music/{{The Rolling Stones\|Band}}''', "Shattered"
27
28	->'''Mario''': This is crazy. Where are we?\
29	'''Luigi''': I dunno, maybe we got knocked unconscious for 100 years and woke up in [[BadFuture Manhattan of the future.]]\
30	'''Mario''': Or maybe the Bronx of ''today!''
31	-->--''Film/SuperMarioBros1993''
32
33	->''And so I come to the bottom line. I don’t want to live in a city where a woman advertises for a lost dog and receives dozens of telephone calls from a variety of people saying they are torturing the animal and will continue to do so unless she pays large sums of money; or in a city where I am told I must always have $ 10 in my wallet for possible muggers because without that I will surely be stabbed; or [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking in a city where my mailman leaves a slip in my box at Christmas suggesting the size of the tip he expects]]. I shall find some of these things wherever I go, and perhaps all of them, but I don’t think so. Above all I want to get away from [[ApatheticCitizens the indifference of New York]]. I want to care and ─ it sounds implausibly poignant ─ be cared about. The city has seen thousands of us come and go. New York doesn’t give a damn.''
34	-->-- '''Caskie Stinnett''', "Farewell, My Unlovely", ''The Atlantic Monthly'', August 1976.
35
36	->''Welcome to New York. NOW DUCK, MOTHERFUCKER!''
37	-->-- Popular T-Shirt design
38
39	->''"New York feeds on human misery. Gradually, it sucks the life out of us. It's a monster."''
40	-->-- '''Perrine Valley''', ''Manga/MadBull34''
41
42	->''"I remember the real New York of the 80s, when in a single night you could score some weed, catch a Times Square porno and get stabbed in the neck by a coked up Music/LouReed."''
43	-->-- '''Creator/StephenColbert''', ''Series/TheColbertReport'' (December 3, 2012)
44
45	->''"In ''[[Series/SavedByTheBell SBTB]]'', denizens of the East Coast are portrayed like the evil twins to the sunny West Coast duders of Bayside. If Bell's California gets its atmosphere from 50' s beach blanket movies and radical cats from soft drink commercials, then its NY is born of 70' s and 80' s cinema, where knife-welding sleaze-gangs mug, rape, and cackle their way through the hellish network of grey, stinking alleyways and smoke-belching drains."''
46	-->--'''Stuart Millard''', ''So Excited, So Scared''
47
48	->''"New York is a self-imposed prison where people convince themselves to live in rat-infested shoeboxes that each cost more than a mansion in the Poconos. Then they spend every summer getting on overheated, nonfunctional trains to vacation where ''every other'' New Yorker is vacationing... There is no escaping that the walls are closing in on you at all times, and that your children will need a $70,000-a-year private school or they will DIE. The city has become an unlivable, hideously expensive mess. New York hates human existence. New York is a shitty Music/JayZ song where he’s going on about how great he is and everyone pretends not to notice he’s a wheezing old butt rocker."''
49	-->--'''[[http://deadspin.com/why-your-team-sucks-2015-new-york-giants-1721065535 Drew Magary]]'''
50
51	-> ''"You can try to change New York, but it's like Jay Z says: concrete bunghole where dreams are made up, there's nothing you can do."''
52	-->-- '''Liz Lemon''', ''Series/ThirtyRock''
53
54	->''...every New Yorker's a veteran. They know to take cover when shooting starts.''
55	-->-- '''Frank Castle''', ''[[Comicbook/ThePunisher The Punisher War Zone]]''
56
57	->''"What do you want me to do, go on television and tell 3 million people they have to be ''nice'' to each other? Being miserable and treating other people like dirt is every New Yorker's god-given right."''
58	-->-- '''The Mayor of New York''', ''Film/GhostbustersII''
59
60	->'''Paul:''' Then why choose fear?\
61	'''Gordon:''' I'm a New Yorker. Fear's my '''life'''.
62	-->-- ''Theatre/{{RENT}}''
63
64	->''Broadway looks so medieval.''
65	-->--'''Music/{{Television}},''' "[[Music/MarqueeMoon Venus]]"
66
67	->''Well, New York isn't the best place to live. I lived here for awhile when I made my way around from place to place. From my experiences, it's not that safe. It's dirty, violent, noisy, and well, it's just not the best place.''
68	-->--'''[[Film/Titanic1997 Jack Dawson]]''', ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/2842586/1/Titanic-A-Life-Journey Titanic: A Life Journey]]''
69
70	->''"It is ridiculous to set a detective story in New York City. New York City is itself a detective story."''
71	-->-- [[BeamMeUpScotty Falsely attributed to]] '''Creator/AgathaChristie'''
72
73	->'''Josh:''' I really need to get back to New York.\
74	'''Emma:''' But you can't! I mean, it isn't safe. It's filled with gambling and crime and poor souls who've tried to make it big but can't go back home because of foolish pride.\
75	'''Josh:''' See, that's what I love about New York.
76	-->-- ''Series/{{Schmigadoon}}''
77
78	->''"New York was falling apart. The infrastructure was collapsing, it was crime central. You go there, you get mugged. And all these young writers, Creator/GerryConway and Creator/MarvWolfman and Creator/LenWein and those guys were living in New York. And not only were they living in New York, they were working for slave wages, so they were not living in the nice parts of New York.''"
79	-->-- '''Creator/MarkWaid''', ''Superheroes: A Never-Ending Battle''
80
81	-> ''"Writing ''ComicBook/SpiderMan'', I was writing about my own life, and my own life was living in New York, and being afraid to take the subway, and knowing that at any moment a guy could walk down the street and shoot me.''
82	-->-- '''Creator/GerryConway''', ''Superheroes: A Never-Ending Battle''
83
84	->'''Brennan:''' ''(to Rekha)'' You weren't polite about where I'm from, you called it a "helltown for bastard people".\
85	'''Ally:''' Yeah Brennan, you're from New York, it's OK to be rude when you're talking about New York.\
86	'''Patrick:''' I mean, it is a rotten tattered asshole full of wretched horrors.\
87	'''Rekha:''' I went there once on a four-hour field trip, and it wasn't what I liked.\
88	'''Ally:''' I went there once, and there was a trash on the ground.\
89	'''Patrick:''' A whole trash?\
90	'''Ally:''' A whole trash ''on the ground''.
91	-->--'''from [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TNpoplfLT1w&t Don't Trash Talk New York]] by Website/CollegeHumor'''
92
93	->''"It was only my sister who could force me to come to this god-awful city. The city that roars down on you. She loved it all. The muggers, the winos, the bag ladies, the wall-to-wall noise. She loved it because it had nothing to do with our childhood. Luke and I hated it for exactly the same reason."''
94	-->--'''Tom Wingo''', ''Film/ThePrinceOfTides''
95
96	->''"The moonbase has been destroyed, taking the Lightning Bug and all his henchmen with it, and New York City has been wiped off the face of the Earth. A double victory!"''
97	-->-- '''The Chief''', ''Film/JMenForever''
98

Context Quotes / TheBigRottenApple