Line #23 Quotes/SkinDeep


1	!!Comic Proper
2
3	->'''Michelle:''' She's also a smartass, but like you say: better a smartass than a dumbass.
4
5	->'''Michelle:''' Okay okay okay calm down. I'm sure there's a perfectly rational explanation for [[TomatoInTheMirror this]]. And that explanation would be...that this is obviously some whacked-out dream.
6
7	->'''Michelle:''' My life has gone from 'alright' to 'crappy fantasy fanfic' in three hours. Cut me some slack.
8
9	->'''Merial:''' You haven't really seen the fun side of all this, Michelle. Just give it a chance, please? It really is great once you stop trying so hard to [[IJustWantToBeNormal make things go back to 'normal.']]
10
11	->'''Jim:''' Oy. Look, it's all super advanced magic and I can't explain it because I really have no idea how it works. [...] Look, it makes more sense when you get a feel for it. [[AWizardDidIt My personal motto is "Tadaaa...Magic!"]]
12
13	->'''Michelle:''' Yeah, I'm not so sure about this [[HalfDressedCartoonAnimal "no pants" thing.]] Getting drafts where drafts should not be gotten.
14
15	->'''Jim:''' This should be easy. Like riding a bike!\
16	'''Michelle:''' I broke my arm riding a bike...
17
18	->'''Michelle:''' I'M GOING TO DIE!!!\
19	'''Jim:''' Well with that attitude you won't accomplish anything!
20
21	->'''Eustace:''' What, are you Irish now, boy? The whole "confuse the bumpkin with different accents" game got old by the third week.
22
23	->'''Jim:''' You look like a crow from ''WesternAnimation/{{Dumbo}}'' that fell into a production of ''Theatre/{{Hair}}.''\
24	'''Michelle:''' ''Jim!''...That's rude, right?\
25	'''Marshall:''' Yes.\
26	'''Michelle:''' ''Jim!''
27
28	->'''Jim:''' Think of [[GoodLuckCharm them]] as insurance so I don't get my gorgeous orange arse handed to me again.
29
30	->'''Jim:''' If you'd stop whining about your own problems for four minutes you might find out.
31
32	->'''Marshall:''' Eustace and I are mystical Indian spirit animals, boy. Give us some credit for being able to see through a half-assed lie.
33
34	->'''Merial:''' I swear to God, if we die I will never forgive myself.
35
36	->'''Greg:''' Galdang that smells like rotten tuna fish burnt hair dog vomit.
37
38	->'''[[ArchangelGabriel Gabe]]:''' Oh, I was about to, but you know how much I hate playing the DeusExMachina.
39
40	->'''[[OurDemonsAreDifferent Mikhail:]]''' Up for [[GoKartingWithBowser poker]] this Friday, Gabe?\
41	'''[[OurAngelsAreDifferent Gabe:]]''' You supply the bourbon and I'll try not to bring down my holy wrath upon thee.
42
43	->'''Gabe:''' Well you do keep saying how much you need a change in your life.\
44	'''Bloodcarver:''' I ''meant'' something like taking a vacation with my wife, not committing ''high treason''.
45
46	->'''Merial:''' Plenty of people talk to you, Greg. You just don't talk back.
47
48	->'''Merial:''' So, um. Feel better now?\
49	'''Jim:''' I just punched a demon in the face. Best birthday of me life.
50
51	->'''Django:''' G'morning, Master Noir. I see you're still very much in need of a haircut.
52
53	->'''Tony:''' "Just a bandersnatch," he says. "Just a walking acid trip. Perfectly normal, it is."
54
55	->'''Tony:''' Okay, so what are these weirdo shops around here?\
56	'''Blanche:''' [[SarcasmMode Oh, well they are just full of the strangest, most magical items ever!]] Brodie's over there is a mysterious place called a "bakery". They sell bizarre and strange items like "biscuits" and "scones." Oh and over there is an ancient mythical establishment known as a "bookstore." Should I slow down? I know all these unfamiliar terms might be overwhelming.
57
58	->'''Zech:''' ''[on an EntertaininglyWrong bestiary's description of centaurs]'' What, you don't believe I'm the spawn of a big horse god and a cloud?\
59	'''Elise:''' I know for a fact that you don't eat raw flesh. Or any meat.\
60	'''Zech:''' I never told you how I eat hobos?
61
62	->'''Elise:''' ''We'' wouldn't be fighting each other constantly over inane reasons, at least.\
63	'''Zech:''' You were about to throw down with me just now 'cause I'm not immediately agreeing with you!
64
65	->'''Jim:''' Is she in full devil regalia? Is she poking him with a gig? Is she parting the heavens and raining fire down upon him? Turning him into one of her legion of hellhounds set to smite all that is unworthy and destroy all that is fun?
66
67	->'''Jim:''' C'mon, I saw Paul and Jon over at Greensleeves and we haven't embarrassed them at all today.
68
69	->'''Lorne:''' What's this? Are we not allowed to come say hello to our dearest siblings?\
70	'''Jon:''' ''No.''\
71	'''Paul:''' You two bring disaster with you.
72
73	->'''Paul:''' You can't make judgements on an entire culture using an eccentric homosexual cursed gryphon as your example, Jonny.\
74	'''Jim:''' Aww, and how does it feel to be related to me by blood, dearest Paulie-poo?
75
76	->'''Jon:''' I ain't a racist. I just don't think it's a good idea to be friends with manticores.\
77	'''Jim:''' Sounds racist to me.
78
79	->'''Jim:''' Honestly, Rupert, how can a blood relative of mine be such crap at Borogove?
80
81	->'''Tim:''' Sam, [[SomebodySetUpUsTheBomb that]] was a very irresponsible and dangerous waste of magic. [[Literature/HarryPotter Ten points from Gryffindor.]]
82
83	->'''Ike:''' Look, I am capable of fixing your keyboard [[ExtremeOmnivore or eating it.]] Guess which I'm ''closer'' to doing?
84
85	->'''Tony:''' What do you ''think'' is the problem?!\
86	'''Tim:''' ''[[BeatPanel beat]]'' I take it this is [[ForcedTransformation not what he's supposed to look like?]]\
87	'''Tony:''' I'm getting really tired of nobody freaking out over this like the should be!
88
89	->'''Abbie:''' You're not a monster, Paul, you don't get it. You got a [[TransformationTrinket medallion]], you can get out of this place. ''I can't''. Sometime before I die I would like to walk out of here without forty layers of concealing clothing on. I want to be able t[='=]''visit me parents in Cardiff'' without it bein' a giant bleedin' production.
90
91	->'''Paul:''' ''siiiigh'' Fine. And if this turns out to be the ''worst idea in 500 years'' I will have ''no end'' of "I told you so"s.
92
93	->'''Abbie:''' Aww, Paulie. If I didn't know better I'd think you weren't thrilled to be planning Jim's going away party.\
94	'''Paul:''' Abbie, if it were up to me the party would consist of a single cake with "Good Riddance" written on it.
95
96	->'''Ike:''' Why, Mr. Hyde, alert the presses! It appears that Master Lyon and Master Finn are ''not'' in fact attached at the hip!
97
98	->'''Jim:''' Can you believe me brother got the Horsemen to play minus their ''Satan drummer?'' Just for li'l ol' me? I get a party an' I get t'piss [[WindmillCrusader Elise]] off at the same time. It truly is a Christmas miracle.
99
100	->'''Jim:''' Not everyone can be [[MundaneFantastic as everyday normal as ouzelum birds and bandersnatches]], can they?
101
102	->'''Lorne:''' It ''is'' crap. Rule number one of the [[HiddenElfVillage Avalon,]] Anthony: Everything David says is crap.
103
104	->'''Tim:''' In honor of Mr Finn's departure from this, [[UsefulNotes/{{Britain}} our sceptred isles]], in favor of [[EagleLand the New World]], tonight we have a duel between two great nations! To my right, hailing from somewhere in the United Kingdom, or so he tells us, we have Royce "The Fool" Carmikal! Jack-of-all-trades and owner of the Electric Voodoo Tattoo and Curio! Mr. Carmikal has challenged the gentleman to my left, known only as Jack! This guitarist of the Four Horsemen comes from the deserts of New Mexico, and has never lost a bar bet! Can one of Her Majesty's own finally beat the Yank? It's the ''British Invasion'' versus ''American Imperialism!''
105
106	->'''Greg:''' Don't underestimate me, Michelle! I held off [[BigfootSasquatchAndYeti the Momo]] with naught but my forehead, you know.
107
108	->'''Janis:''' Well I'm sorry, Michelle, but if you aren't going to ''tell'' me what you're worried about I'm to start assuming!
109
110	->'''Janis:''' Whatever you need to say, I'm ''sure'' it's not as bad as you think.\
111	'''Michelle:''' You say that ''now'' but you don’t know the kind of crazy that’s about to come out of my mouth.
112
113	->'''Janis:''' It hasn't really sunken in yet. I'm sure once you leave I'll start sobbing uncontrollably.
114
115	->'''Michelle:''' Would you like to see ''two'' impossible things today?
116
117	->'''Greg:''' That's none of your business! And stop making bets about me!
118
119	->'''Michelle:''' Oh ''sorry'', I must've been distracted by the ''[[TheLegionsOfHell demons]]'' and the ''[[OurDragonsAreDifferent dragon]]'' and the ''[[TomatoInTheMirror CHANGING MY ENTIRE SPECIES]]'' thing.
120
121	->'''Michelle:''' I'm leaving. Don't have too much fun at our expense.
122
123	->'''Lily:''' I am as Arthur, on the holiest of quests.
124
125	->'''Lily:''' I can spend my notes on whatever ridiculous thing I want to spend them on, and I ''[[PunctuatedForEmphasis want. This. Talisman.]]''\
126	'''Dean:''' Well I'm not buying you a pint next time you say you're short. Those days are over, moneybags.
127
128	->'''Alec:''' Congratulations, Snodgrass. I don't know how you dropped off me radar, but you have successfully progressed from a mere annoyance to a ''being of EXTREME INTEREST.'' '''I hope you enjoy the extra attention.'''
129
130	->'''Eustace:''' Anybody told you what a ''barrel of giggles'' you are, Ms. Rienkemeyer?
131
132	->'''Gabe:''' I am far too busy for this hide-and-seek nonsense. Attention! Secretive crazy hill folk! I need to talk to whoever's in charge here!
133
134	->'''Myra:''' A prank requires something to be funny.
135
136	->'''Gabe:''' Myra, I don't suppose you would enjoy vanquishing hellbeasts, would you?\
137	'''Myra:''' I'm sure I could find ''some'' way to have a good time.
138
139	->'''Eustace:''' That's not super reassuring.\
140	'''Gabe:''' I'm not a reassuring being.
141
142	->'''Rhonda:''' Hold on, I'm still feeding off her pure hatred. It gives me sustenance.
143
144	->'''Tony:''' ''Oh sodding hell,'' why are you always [[StealthHiBye popping up]] around me?\
145	'''Alec:''' I work here. I'm allowed to pop up.
146
147
148
149	!!Comments[=/=]Alt Texts
150	%%
151	%%It's not typical to have a section like this, but there were so many great quotes.
152	%%
153	%% If this section is allowed to stay, PLEASE DO NOT add your own comments! Other readers will judge that.
154
155	->'''runedeadth:''' ...I MUST go out and buy a suspicious cloak and walk around town wearing it. 6'4" guy walking round all mysterious, [[PlotCoupon dropping random trinkets]]...Well, that’s my weekend planned.
156
157	->'''runedeadth:''' When I stub my toe I [[ClusterFBomb swear like a sailor]]. When I have my toenail ripped out I say things like [[GoshDarnItToHeck "Fudgesicles!" and “Gosh Darn it!"]]. True story.
158
159	->'''runedeadth:''' Crack Crack! Tsh tsh tsh tsh Crunch. Either I’m being followed, or theres a really bad Indie band out here!
160
161	->'''Silverwolf:''' [[note]]responding to the exposition about the Great War between dragons and sphinxes[[/note]] So in retaliation, the dragons hired the PR firm of [[Literature/InheritanceCycle Paolini]] and [[Literature/DragonridersOfPern McCaffrey...]]
162
163	->'''Kabbalist:''' So...is this GOOD white fire, or BAD white fire? These [[EmotionalPowers emotionally activated superpowers]] can go either way.
164
165	->'''runedeadth:''' [[SarcasmMode There's nothing more fun]] than trying to explain something complicated to someone who really doesn't get it.\
166	'''Kabbalist:''' Particularly when you don't fully understand it either, and to someone that expects you to know everything just because you know more than they do.
167
168	->'''Saelina:''' "Normal" is a setting on the clothes dryer. For everything/body else...fuggedaboudit.\
169	'''[=AshtaraSilunar=]:''' No, no. All physics majors know that you are normal if you’re perpendicular to the ground. Therefore anyone standing is normal!
170
171	->'''runedeadth:''' [[DieOrFly Cliff Lion Tossing]], a popular sport in the Avalons. Of course, indestructible Nemean Lions are usually used, so a winged one might be cheating.
172
173	->'''mask777:''' Nah, no need for [memory-erasing] powers. You just bonk their heads, find a tree with a low branch, and when they wake up tell them they hit their head.
174
175	->'''[=NXTangl=]:''' [[CheshireCatGrin Cheshire]] requires teeth and, in extreme cases, a complete lack of anything attached to said smile.
176
177	->'''Murg:''' Draconomicon? Really? I'll bet hooking a turbine up to [[Creator/HPLovecraft Lovecraft's]] spinning grave could prove to be a viable source of renewable energy.
178
179	->'''Mooglets:''' Is it odd that I think Jim is far more handsome in his [[OurGryphonsAreDifferent true]] or even half form that in human?\
180	'''[=TheOtterOne=]:''' No. Everyone's more handsome when they're happy with how they look; he’s happiest when he looks the way he’s accustomed to.
181
182	->'''The_Rippy_One:''' [[WithCatlikeTread And the entire readership]] {{facepalm}}s.
183
184	->'''[=CyberSkull=]:''' Why can't dreams ever give nice, sensible, logical advice?
185
186	->'''Sybarite:''' It is amazing how much easier it is to deal with monsters and demons when you have no fear. It works even better when you are justified in having no fear.
187
188	->'''Kabbalist:''' Note to self: buy any 'normal' friends an etiquette manual and translation guide before introducing them to the weirdos I usually prefer to keep company with.
189
190	->'''[=CrayolaAutumn=]:''' Today, Blanche teaches us how NOT to be subtle.
191
192	->'''Alt Text:''' ''Cliffhangers happen when things actually happen in this comic instead of just people yap yap yappin' at each other.''
193
194	->'''Drake Arron:''' We should SO continue that argument in the comments...
195
196	->'''Silver Guardian:''' Because when you don’t know that you don’t know something, it’s easy to make yourself believe you do know. And because most people don’t want to believe they didn’t know as much about themselves as they thought they did.
197
198	->'''Alerhys:''' "[[TemptingFate It’ll be a safe, controlled environment.]]" I felt a great disturbance in the Force...as if millions of [[GenreSavvy genre-aware voices]] suddenly cried out...
199
200	->'''Footnote:''' ''I wouldn’t trust Alec as far as I could throw him. And seeing that he’s a giant monster nightmare bear, I can’t throw him at all.''
201
202	->'''Greenwood Goat:''' Again, no problem with the exposition. Exposition is good. Exposition is fun. ''May those who rail at exposition be confounded–-do not count them among the just!''
203
204	->'''Mai:''' Or am I seeing links that aren’t there? I probably am--I've had too much wine this evening and I swear I briefly managed to link Music/DavidBowie to the Tooth Fairy. Can't quite remember how.
205
206	->'''Q?:''' This should be interesting, a smile from an insecure (half) manticore, second prize winner in the [[MoreTeethThanTheOsmondFamily scariest teeth awards]].
207
208	->'''Q?:''' Adaptation through alcohol and complaining, the age old method.
209
210	->'''Silver Guardian:''' Depending on where you are and who you ask, ''any'' sort of contest might bring such a reaction, especially from men with more pride than self-control.
211
212	->'''Emma:''' I have no idea what’s going on, but I bet whatever it is is going to be hilarious.
213
214	->'''Chabbit:''' NO, GREG, [[TemptingFate DON’T SAY IT!]] YOU JUST INVITED ALL THE SHENANIGANS IN!!!
215
216	->'''Dragontech:''' Smooth as 60-grit sandpaper...
217
218	->'''Silver Guardian:''' [My mother], meanwhile, would sit there and calmly take it in stride. This is not to say that she would believe me, mind you, merely that she would humor me.
219
220	->'''Min:''' Kory, your plot thickener is of an exceptional brand. May I get the name of the store at which you purchase it?
221
222	->'''Antigone:''' I am very pleased that this isn’t the kind of comic where adolescents with "superpowers" hide it all from their parents and handle everything by themselves.
223
224	->'''[=CrayolaAutumn=]:''' There’s an ACME delivery plane flying overhead with a loose anvil sliding toward the back ramp.
225
226	->'''Quats:''' Love conquers all, DESPITE that cheesy ‘mustache’ that looks like a caterpillar died on your lip last year.
227
228	->'''Drake Arron:''' I just hope this isn’t too stereotypical. I hate stereotypical.
229
230	->'''Yargo:''' Jim is so cute [[ManChild when he’s four.]]
231
232	->'''Syberi:''' Things changed: 0. Things revealed: >1.
233
234	->'''[=Dragontech64=]:''' This encounter foretells of great tribulations in the near future. Followed with a great "I told you so".
235
236	->'''khade:''' There is good evidence that if they actually cared to, and could work together for an extended amount of time, the bugbears would rule the world. Luckily they all know how much work it would be and realize that they’d rather be doing ANYTHING else.
237
238	->'''[=NasiDe=]:''' We go throughout the entire comic expecting the unexpected, and then the expected comes along leaving us surprised that the unexpected never came!
239
240	->'''mage_cat:''' It would be funny if one day someone countered one of Alec’s bugbear theories by saying the person in question was a different creature entirely. "Creator/HPLovecraft was a nokk. I thought everyone knew that."
241
242	->'''Alexander:''' That moment when you realize you’ve started a war that simply can’t be won.
243
244	->'''Dajagr:''' It’s all fun and games until someone loses an eye...then it’s a scavenger hunt!
245
246	->'''mage_cat:''' I wonder if Gabe won the Nightmare in a poker game.\
247	'''Scurv Of PCP:''' I wonder if Gabe ''lost'' and got Nightmare in a poker game.
248
249	->'''Jade Fairchild:''' I love how nonchalant Gabe is about all of that nonsense. Some might hear such a conversation and...I dunno...DESTROY.
250
251	->'''Kai:''' Oh my god Hank you are like an adorable little Disney character [[SawedOffShotgun with an NRA membership]].
252
253	->'''TB:''' Finding a great new webcomic and realizing you’ve got [[ArchiveBinge years of material to read]] is like discovering a new author you really like in the library and finding out he wrote another thirty books.
254
255	->'''[=KRuth=]:''' I’m not sure if I should be curious or worried that you seem to have so much practical knowledge of pole-arms...
256
257	->'''Greenwood Goat:''' Maybe he wants to go down in legend, as a tale to frighten children with.
258
259	->'''Zzzx:''' That’s a face that is ready to do some stomping of other faces.
260
261	->'''Hadashi:''' This doesn’t look like a level-appropriate encounter, but on the off-chance they win the loot drop will be EPIC.
262
263	->'''[=JoB=]:''' Considering that [[SlasherSmile the corners of her mouth are about to become part of her hairdo]], chances are that Myra’s enjoying [[DemonSlaying her current activity]] A LOT.
264
265	->'''ponyhome:''' If you’re going to be pedantically correcting people, do it right.
266
267	->'''Retmas:''' Rough translation: [[RoaringRampageOfRevenge YOU HAVE F***ED UP]]
268
269	->'''TB:''' Never get blood all over a guy who really likes white suits.
270
271	->'''Lazureus Falcone:''' Got to love dangling that carrot of hope just in-front of their face long enough to get their hopes up...and then you eat it.
272
273	->'''Alt Text:''' ''Nobody gets me, I'm the wind, baby.''\
274	'''Quirky:''' CRASH ...The wind just broke his leg.
275
276	->'''TCS:''' The apple may not fall far, but sometimes it gets picked up and carried to a better place.
277
278	->'''Kata:''' There’s no angst so great that hearing your BFF called humiliating pet names by his mother can’t make it better.
279
280	->'''TCS:''' Annnnd this is the part where my maturity ran out.
281
282	->'''GDA:''' "Unique." A fancy way of saying "There’s nobody else like you." Also a polite way of saying "We have no idea what you are or how to fix you."
283
284	->'''Lynx-Eye:''' You can run, but you’ll just go to jail tired.
285
286	->'''Anima:''' Just because there are people with worse problems than you, doesn’t mean your problem is any less of a problem.
287
288	->'''Mourice:''' ''[responding to a HurricaneOfPuns]'' I don’t know whether to clunk your heads together or give you both medals.
289
290	->'''Superrad:''' I hope that last panel was as fun to draw as it looks like it was.
291
292	->'''Sabreur:''' Only a cat can have a face that says “I love you!” and claws that say “You’re bleeding now!” at the same time.
293
294	->'''TB:''' Someone who invented that in our world would have Bill Gates shining their shoes.
295
296	->'''Spencer:''' Ooo! [[Creator/HPLovecraft Lovecraftian]] sounds nice! It has "Love" in it! ''Website/{{Google}}'' Oh. Never-mind. I take that back. The love I expected was replaced with [[EldritchAbomination an equal or greater amount of tentacles.]]
297
298	->'''Az:''' Two mustaches enter, one mustache leaves!
299
300	->'''Merle:''' Oh jeez, I am trying to comfort a fictional character. This is what webcomics have done to me.
301
302	->'''mage_cat:''' A lot of teenagers act like they’re invulnerable anyway. I cringe to think of what one with [[NighInvulnerability actual proof of the matter]] would get up to.
303
304	->'''Averant:''' It’s going to be my stock response now. "Man, I’m bored." "Bored? BUT YOU HAVE THUMBS!"
305
306	->'''[=SuperTaster=]:''' Cats can sleep anywhere. Birds have wiggly necks. They combine to form Anime/{{Voltron}}.
307
308	->'''[=PJSam=]:''' Oh that’s right, these guys are evil.

Context Quotes / SkinDeep