Line #15 Quotes/AlternativeCharacterInterpretation


1	->'''Character name:''' Complicated and nuanced, with good intentions, ''or'' multilayered and complex, with evil intentions?
2	-->-- Website/ThisVeryWiki, almost every AlternativeCharacterInterpretation entry
3
4	->''The hell kind of plumber...?''
5	->''I'm writing your union, tell you what.''
6	->''I bet they'd love to know you're doing mushrooms,''
7	->''And blowing up landmarks,''
8	->''And setting the wildlife on fire.''
9	-->-- '''Music/RobBalder''', ''Still Annoyed''
10
11	->'''Barney:''' Hey, ''Film/TheKarateKid'' is a great movie. It's the story of a hopeful young karate enthusiast whose dreams and moxie take him all the way to the All-Valley Karate Championship. Course, sadly, he loses in the final round to that nerd kid, but he learns an important lesson about gracefully accepting defeat.\
12	'''Lily:''' Wait, when you watch ''The Karate Kid'' you actually root for that mean blonde boy?\
13	'''Barney:''' No, I root for the scrawny loser from New Jersey who barely even knows karate. When I watch ''The Karate Kid'' I root for ''the'' karate kid, Johnny Lawrence from the Cobra Kai dojo. Get your head out of your ass, Lily.
14	-->-- ''Series/HowIMetYourMother'', "The Stinsons"
15
16	->''She'd outpester any pest\
17	Drive a hornet from its nest\
18	She could throw a whirling dervish out of whirl\
19	She is gentle, she is mild\
20	She's a riddle, she's a child\
21	She's a headache!\
22	She's an angel!\
23	She's a girl!''
24	-->-- "How Do You Solve a Problem Like Maria?", ''Theatre/TheSoundOfMusic''
25
26	-> ''I wanted to find an escape too, but every word I'd heard confirmed my fear that Heather had somehow allied herself with a ghost. What I wasn't sure of was the danger -- was Helen as wicked as Heather made her out to be, or was she merely a lost child looking for someone to love her?''
27	-->-- '''Molly,''' ''Literature/WaitTillHelenComesAGhostStory''
28
29	->''"A fastidious pigeon-worshiping felt tyrant whose draconian Shari'a law allows for neither loud noise nor rubber duckies!"''
30	-->-- '''[[Series/SesameStreet Bert]]''', as imagined by '''[[Series/TheDailyShow Jon Stewart]]''' in Radio/GlennBeck-parody mode
31
32	->''"This was a world where orcs were used as target practice by elvish communities. The elves loved that shit. Sauron put a stop to that by offering all the underprivileged creatures a place in his non-race-exclusive army (the only nonsegregated force in Middle-Earth except for the Fellowship) with promises of their own country and a future. After what he did for the orcs and goblins, Sauron was just some towering mace-wielding folk hero."''
33	-->--'''''Website/{{Cracked}}''''', "9 Famous Movie Villains Who Were Right All Along"
34
35	->''"Applejack, with her lovably inconsistent accent and mannerisms represents the Element of: The Alternate Interpretation"''
36	-->--'''[[WesternAnimation/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagic Twilight Sparkle]]''', ''WebVideo/MyLittlePonyCamaraderieIsSupernatural'', "The Elements of Parody"
37
38	-> ''A discussion about the nature of eternity, set against a blank, featureless void: behold the beginning of the transformation of ComicStrip/TheFamilyCircus into Existential Despair Comics.''
39	-->-- '''Blog/TheComicsCurmudgeon'''
40
41	->''"Kind of unrelated, but the fact that Ulfric has been compared to both UsefulNotes/AdolfHitler and William Wallace just goes to show what an awesome job Creator/{{Bethesda}} did of making a complex, realistic character."''\
42	''"Or that the Skyrim fanbase consists of over-generalizing trogs with small reference pools."''
43	-->--Discussion on [[WMG/TheElderScrollsVSkyrim the WMG page]] of ''VideoGame/TheElderScrollsVSkyrim''
44
45	->''...In any case, the only reason this stratagem ''[giving Persephone the pomegranate seeds]'' worked was because the seeds were so little that [[Myth/ClassicalMythology Persephone]] thought they wouldn’t count. …Or at least that was the excuse she gave her Mom. My money says she ate them because Hades had just finished explaining to her that if she stayed with him she could be undisputed Queen of one of the three realms of existence. And she — clever young divinity that she was — immediately realized how to finesse this situation so that she could, quite literally, have the best of both worlds. If she then claimed to the Olympians sent to fetch her home that “he pressured me into eating them”, well, they’d be predisposed to believe that anyway…)''
46	-->-- '''Creator/DianeDuane''' [[http://dduane.tumblr.com/post/74399149579/something-thats-been-making-me-itch-all-day discussing]] the story of Persephone
47
48	->'''Varric''': So, that's it. That's the whole story.\
49	'''Cassandra''': Then Meredith provoked the Circle. She was to blame... ''(for the Mage-Templar war)''\
50	'''Varric''': Or that damned idol was. ... Take your pick.
51	-->--''VideoGame/DragonAgeII''
52
53	->"Exacerbating the situation, Mario said, is the seemingly arbitrary placement of the hazards. "I could see why, if you're in a factory, you might find yourself jumping around on dangerous conveyor belts moving in different directions," he said. "But why would you have conveyor belts in a castle? Or in the middle of a forest? Nintendo and these other companies are always talking about how realistic their graphics are. Well, what's so realistic about killer turtles shooting out of clouds and such?"
54
55	->Added Mario: "It's-a me, Mario!"
56	-->--''Website/TheOnion'', ''Video-Game Characters Denounce Randomly Placed Swinging Blades''
57
58	->''"Hettie Muskrat is the most evil woman in Waterville. She talked Ma into entering the contest; now she’s totally jinxing her in the next scene. This is a soap opera. Just look at those beady little muskrat eyes. What’s her SCHEME?"''
59	-->-- '''[=ToughPigs=] writer Kynan Baker''' in his and Danny Horn's [[http://www.toughpigs.com/anotherxmas-1/ review]] of ''Film/EmmetOttersJugBandChristmas''
60
61	->''"One moment, I see heroic Wardens lighting the fire and a power-mad villain sneering as he lets King Cailan fall. The next, I see an army overwhelmed, and a veteran commander refusing to let more soldiers die in a lost cause."''
62	--> -- '''Solas''', ''VideoGame/DragonAgeInquisition''
63
64	->''The Orks are the pinnacle of creation. For them, the great struggle is won. They have evolved a society which knows no stress or angst. Who are we to judge them? We Eldar who have failed, or the Humans, on the road to ruin in their turn? And why? Because we sought answers to questions that an Ork wouldn't even bother to ask! We see a culture that is strong and despise it as crude.''
65	-->--'''Uthan the Perverse''', Eldar philosopher, ''TabletopGame/{{Warhammer 40000}}''
66
67	-> ''Right now I'd like to show you one of my favorite cartoons. [[WesternAnimation/WileECoyoteandtheRoadRunner It's a sad, depressing story about a pathetic Coyote who spends every waking moment his life in the futile pursuit of a sadistic roadrunner]], who mocks him and laughs at him as he's repeatedly '''crushed''' and '''maimed'''! I hope you enjoy it!''
68	-->-- '''[[Music/WeirdAlYankovic George Newman]]''', ''Film/{{UHF}}''
69
70	-> ''Imma lay it out for you. [[Franchise/{{Batman}} Rich dude]] has a corporation, has state-of-the-art equipment, and he uses this to beat up on street-level crime. He doesn't mess with the industrialists or the super-capitalists, the Murdochs or the Trumps -- he really just fuck with the purse-snatchers on the corner. Batman is a conservative's wet dream. Fuck Batman.''
71	-->-- '''Reginald D. Hunter''', ''Series/HaveIGotNewsForYou''
72
73	->'''Chet:''' I partially decided on my name due to the tales of the old hero Chet Cannister.\
74	'''Spensa:''' Oh, those are good. But I like the older ones best. Heroes like Odysseus.\
75	'''Chet:''' Or Hercules.\
76	'''Spensa:''' Yeah. Or ''Satan''.\
77	'''Chet:''' ''[blinks]'' Excuse me?\
78	'''Spensa:''' Satan? The hero?\
79	'''Chet:''' The... hero.\
80	'''Spensa:''' Yeah. Gran-Gran told me the story. Satan got thrown into a place of fire, but he was like, "Hey, everyone. It doesn't matter, so long as we have each other. We can make this place as good as any paradise." Then he volunteered to infiltrate the enemy's world and went on this big quest through the Abyss.\
81	'''Chet:''' Now, my memory--as I've warned you--isn't great. But that sounds like the old poem ''Literature/ParadiseLost''. I... think you might have misinterpreted it.\
82	'''Spensa:''' What? Who do ''you'' think was the hero of that story?\
83	'''Chet:''' Adam and Eve.\
84	'''Spensa:''' Those losers? They didn't do anything but sit around! Everyone else had flaming swords and dramatic battles!
85	-->-- ''Literature/{{Cytonic}}''
86
87	->'''Forty [on the hydroelectric dam in [[VideoGame/MarioKart8 Mount Wario]][=]=]''': All of these tracks have bits that suggest that VideoGame/{{Wario}} is this like, super-rich, environmentally-minded entrepreneur, and I really like that take on Wario. It's like yeah, he's fat and greedy, and goes and steals treasure all the time, but then he invests it in like, environmental projects. That you can race in. Like, "Yeah, I built this dam in this mountain. It provides electricity for thousands; for all of [[VideoGame/SuperMarioOdyssey New Donk City]]."\
88	'''Lee''': [="WAAAAAAht=] am I gonna do about this energy crisis?"\
89	'''Forty''': Waluigi ain't gonna build no dam.
90	-->-- '''WebVideo/{{Lythero}}''', "[[https://youtu.be/G4I_Sy9JfCk Mario Kartastrophe 6 DELUXE]]"
91
92	->''"The Commissioner is nevertheless irritable and rude. It is unclear if this is the way she just normally is or the pressure of having a potentially fatal illness is causing her to snap."''
93	-->-- '''Jeremy Perron''' [[https://www.jeremysstartrekreviews.com/2020/05/kirk-spock-and-mccoy-meet-father-of.html on]] ''Series/StarTrekTheOriginalSeries'', "The Companion's World"
94
95	->''Now take Sir UsefulNotes/FrancisDrake.\
96	The Spanish all despise him.\
97	But to the British, he's a hero,\
98	And they idolise him.\
99	It's how you look at buccaneers,\
100	That makes them bad or good.\
101	And I see us as members of,\
102	A noble brotherhood.''
103	-->--"Professional Pirate", '''Long John Silver''', ''Film/MuppetTreasureIsland''
104
105	->'''Doug''': "Maybe he is crying because the baby is scared."
106	->'''Green Bear''': "Or maybe because the baby doesn't wanna leave the beach just because it's raining, because we're all wet anyway, so why do we have to go?!"
107	->'''Eileen''': "Or ''both''?"
108	-->-- ''WebVideo/KidTimeStoryTime'' [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zPNY4ZKuogk on]] ''Sand Between My Toes''

Context Quotes / AlternativeCharacterInterpretation