Line #18 Literature/AmericaTheBook


1	[[quoteright:320:[[Series/TheDailyShow https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/America_1746.jpg]]]]
2	[[caption-width-right:320: [[Webcomic/ElGoonishShive READ or the eagle will eat you.]]]]
3	->''I would certainly read this book if I were alive today, which, for all you geniuses out there, I am not.''
4	-->--'''UsefulNotes/AbrahamLincoln'''
5
6	''America (The Book): A Citizen's Guide to Democracy Inaction'' is a SatireParodyPastiche of high-school textbooks about the history of American democracy and politics by the writers of ''Series/TheDailyShow''.
7
8	Now has a sequel [[SpiritualSuccessor of sorts]]: ''[[Literature/EarthTheBook Earth (The Book): A Visitor's Guide to the Human Race]]''.
9
10	Not to be confused with ''Literature/IAmAmericaAndSoCanYou'' by Creator/StephenColbert.
11
12	-----
13	!!This book provides examples of:
14	* TheAbridgedHistory: pretty much what this book provides.
15	* AndAllIGotWasThisLousyTShirt: The book has a photo of a 1800 presidential campaign shirt (fake, obviously) that reads "I endorsed the candidacy of Thomas Jefferson, for which I was inadequately compensated with this tunic of poor qualitie!"
16	* {{Animeland}}: Japan, according to this book.
17	* TheAnnotatedEdition: The second printing of the book contains humorous "fact check" annotations in red ink.
18	* AttackOfThePoliticalAd: An entire page in the chapter on campaigning is dedicated to satirizing negative political advertising as well as highlighting some of its most famous RealLife examples. Among the book's surreal claims, a year after UsefulNotes/LyndonJohnson's [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=63h_v6uf0Ao "Daisy"]] ad from the 1964 US Presidential election suggested that his opponent Barry Goldwater would start a nuclear war, Barry Goldwater started a nuclear war; [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Io9KMSSEZ0Y Willie Horton]] was Michael Dukakis's running mate in 1988; and an underground smear campaign in ancient Rome depicted UsefulNotes/{{Caligula}} as "a pretty nice guy", [[TheCaligula to which it then said Caligula]] immediately went into "damage control" by [[CardCarryingVillain publicly sodomizing a puppy]].
19	* AudioAdaptation: Mostly narrated by Jon Stewart with the chapter titles and some sections read by Creator/StephenColbert. Creator/SamanthaBee also narrates the "Would You Mind If I Told You How We Do It in Canada?" sections. Some parts are also read by Creator/RobCorddry and Creator/EdHelms.
20	* AuthorTract: ''ComicStrip/MallardFillmore'' is mocked as one. The eponymous character rants about environmental regulations and income taxes until the last panel, in which he realizes that he forgot to tell a joke.
21	* BalkanizeMe: Parodied. The book claims that today, each resident of the former Yugoslavia "lives in the Independent Republic of Himself".
22	* BloodOnTheDebateFloor: The book claims that after [[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caning_of_Charles_Sumner Preston Brooks beat Charles Sumner half to death on the Senate floor]], only "wiffle canes" were allowed in the Senate.
23	* ColonCancer: Series/LawAndOrderSpecialVictimsUnit: Molested Corpse: TheMovie
24	* ComicallyMissingThePoint: The "corrections" in the Teachers' Edition.
25	* CourteousCanadian:
26	** Canadian contributor Samantha Bee has a recurring feature called "Would You Mind If I Told You How We Do It in Canada?", mocking Canada's reputation for being polite, unassuming, and boring.
27	** Her own full length book, ''Pardon Me, but May I Interest You in a Book About Canada?'', advertised in the back.
28	* CrapsackWorld: The portrait of future America, replete with zombie politicians, evil children, no water, and [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking rampant obesity]].
29	* {{Dedication}}: ''To the huddled masses, keep yearnin'!''
30	* DirtyCoward: The book claims that while Nathan Hale did say "I only regret that I have but one life to give my country." he continued with "But what I really regret is that I'm giving it now." And then began the begging.
31	* DrinkingGame: Invoked. Page 66 provides a number of drinking games for C-SPAN. For instance, when members of Congress are forced to use polite terms (e.g. "my esteemed colleague") [[WithAllDueRespect instead of calling each other assholes]], drink.
32	** That's called chugging...
33	* EvenTheSubtitlerIsStumped: In the section about Australia, they attempt to translate the lyrics of "Waltzing Matilda". Whoever was writing ends up giving up when they can't figure out what the hell half the things in the song mean. "'English-speaking' country my [[HypocriticalHumour ass]]."
34	* FanDisservice: Naked pictures of the Supreme Court Justices (of course not real, but their heads are imposed on naked bodies appropriate for their age and shape). This got it banned from Wal-Mart.
35	* FellOffTheBackOfATruck: Source of swag for politicians who support organized labor.
36	* FootnoteFever: The sidenotes are to keep up the illusion of being a school textbook, which often have all sorts of bizarre infoboxes in the margins. The footnotes are unexplainable except by RuleOfFunny, however.
37	** One of these was as follows.
38	---> "Were You Aware?" That the term "Did You Know?" [[WritingAroundTrademarks is copyrighted by another publisher]]?
39	** It also has a faux essay on "How to [[UsefulNotes/AmericanPoliticalSystem Filibuster]]" that's basically a page of footnotes, footnotes within footnotes, symbols that look like footnotes within footnotes...
40	** A later "Teacher's Edition" of the book adds another layer of commentary, in the form of angry red notes scrawled all through the book by a history professor who is almost but not quite aware that the book is comedy. He gives it a passing grade of B-.
41	* GeorgeWashingtonSleptHere: Among the list of George Washington's achievements is "All-time record holder for Most Places Slept."
42	* HairOfTheDog: The RNC schedule has a wake-up call at 7:15 am and "Hair of the Dog" at 7:16 am.
43	* HelpingGrannyCrossTheStreet: Subverted in a section about campaign propaganda that claimed Caligula's enemies "smeared" his reputation as, [[TheCaligula well]], with such accusations as helping an old lady across the Appian Way.
44	* HiroshimaAsAUnitOfMeasure: Parodied; trial coverage is measured in "Buttafuocos".
45	* HistoricalHilarity
46	* TheInternetIsForPorn: It referred to the Internet as a source of communication, information, and "a staggering array of human sexual fetish".
47	* ItsNotPornItsArt: The book mentions Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart's famous quote about recognizing pornography ("I know it when I see it") and adds: "Stewart spent the remainder of his judgeship obsessed with better defining pornography, eventually settling on slightly more graphic characterization: "that which gives me wood."
48	* MissingWhiteWomanSyndrome: Provides a handy formula for determining how much coverage your disappearance will get:
49	-->"y = Family Income [==] (Abductee Cuteness/Skin Color)^2 + Length of Abduction [==] Media Savvy of Grieving Parents^3 (Where y = minutes of coverage)".
50	* MoralGuardians: Pulled from the shelves at Wal-Mart because it included cut out paper dolls of the Supreme Court justices. [[BrainBleach Naked.]]
51	* NakedPeopleAreFunny: The aforementioned naked cut out paper dolls of US Supreme Court Justices.
52	* NoteFromEd: A portion of the "Would You Mind If I Told You How We Do It In Canada?" essay about Parliament is "deleted due to extreme boringness" by the editor.
53	* PeoplesRepublicOfTyranny: [[{{Lampshading}} Lampshaded]] in the section on Africa; the Democratic Republic of the Congo is noted as one of these, and apparently gets worse as the "democratic republic" part of the name is further emphasized.
54	--> Central Africa's largest nation has grown more oppressive over the decades, and its name has kept pace."
55	--> Congo. Inherent lies in name: 0. Oppression level: bloody.
56	--> Republic of the Congo. Inherent lies in name: 1. Oppression level: sadistic.
57	--> Democratic Republic of the Congo. Inherent lies in name: 2. Oppression level: genocidal.
58	--> People's Democratic Republic of the Congo. Lies in name; 3. Oppression level: inhuman.
59	--> [[SugarBowl Shiny]], [[ShoutOut Happy]] People's Democratic Republic of the Congo. Inherent lies in name: 5. Oppression level: [[DontAskJustRun HIDE]].
60	* QuirkyNeighbourCountry: How UsefulNotes/NewZealand is mentioned in one sentence: "UsefulNotes/{{Australia}}'s Canada".
61	* RobotWar: The Constitutional Robocracy appears to take place after one.
62	* SensualSlavs: The section on Russia notes the Russian Paradox that young Russian women are beautiful while old Russian women are hideous. A picture comparison purports to show a young beauty queen before and after she crosses the threshold, becoming an old crone in the span of two weeks.
63	* {{Sequelitis}}: Invoked. According to the book, John Locke's ''Second Treatise on Government'' was panned by critics "who saw it as a flimsy pretext to bring back the characters from the ''First Treatise''".
64	** And again when they mention the (fictional) sequel to ''Letters From a Pennsylvania Farmer'', entitled ''The Pennsylvania Farmer [[Franchise/HarryPotter and the Goblet of Fire]]''.
65	* ShadowGovernment: The original hardcover edition came with a parodic pullout poster outlining the separate branches and departments of "The Shadow Government" that all operate in secret beneath the three co-branches of US government.
66	* SirSwearsALot: The Third Duchess of Kent is a literal example.
67	-->"Fuck with a motherfucker's tea and shit be on."
68	* SomeOfMyBestFriendsAreX: There's a section listing the most controversial Supreme Court nominees. One of them is (fictitious) Floyd Burnington, who was a member of TheKlan. The book notes: "But some of his best friends were... Actually, they were all white."
69	* StrawmanNewsMedia: The media get a ''huge'' TakeThat in the form of a one-page rant about how they have abdicated their responsibilities of fact-checking government processes in favor of ratings (complete with a still image of [[Film/{{Network}} Howard Beale losing his mind on air]]). The next page (a re-do of that chapter) claimed that it was fueled by sleep deprivation and Red Bull.
70	--> Why they've stopped doing that is a mystery. I mean, 300 camera crews outside a courthouse to see what Kobe Bryant is wearing when the judge sets his hearing date, while false information used to send our country to war goes unchecked? [[PrecisionFStrike What the fuck happened?]] These spineless cowards in the press have finally gone too far. They have violated a trust. "Was President Bush successful in convincing Americans to go to war with Iraq?" Who gives a shit? Why not tell us if what he said was ''true''? And the excuses. My God, the excuses! "Hey, we just give the people what they want." "What can we do, this administration is secretive." "[[WorstNewsJudgmentEver But the last season of]] ''Series/{{Friends}}'' really is news." The unmitigated gall of these weak-willed... You're supposed to be ''helping'' us, you indecent piles of shit! I... fuck it. [[DespairEventHorizon Just fuck it...]]
71	** Even after the restart, it's worth noting that the ensuing chapter on the media is the longest one in the book.
72	* SuperFunHappyThingOfDoom: The more pleasant and optimistic an African government/country sounds the more dangerous and depraved it is. The wording could apply to [[{{Engrish}} Japan]] as well.
73	* TakeThat: A section for mock political cartoons aims specifically at comics like the conservative-leaning ''ComicStrip/MallardFillmore'' and the liberal-leaning ''ComicStrip/{{Doonesbury}}''. The MF stand-in ends the strip with "Oops! I forgot to tell a joke", a stab at Fillmore's tendency to go on {{Author Tract}}s - and faux-Doonesbury is simply three panels of the White House with absolutely nothing happening, mocking the strip's dry penchant for abstract political metaphor. Even the professor making notes in the Teacher's Edition gets in on the action, noting that the ''Mallard Fillmore'' parody "accurately portrays the strip's typical level of humor".
74	* TemptingFate: Discussing a flaw with the system of checks and balances through the separation of powers, the Founding Fathers decided that the only way it would be a problem is if one political party (keep in mind a number of the Founders were against political parties even ''existing'') were to have an elected president, control both houses of Congress, and a friendly judiciary (particularly a Supreme Court).
75	-->"And then they laughed and laughed and laughed."
76	* TranslationByVolume: It references this concept of shouting at foreigners. "Do... you... speak... English?"
77	* UglySlavicWomen: It hits both ends of this trope: "Russian women are known for three things: their beauty, their heartiness, and the speed with which one turns into the other." This is illustrated by a picture of a young, attractive woman, captioned "Miss Vladivostok", and an old crone, captioned "Miss Vladivostok, [some implausibly short amount of time] later".
78	* VicePresidentWho: The "Welcome Letter" signed by all the former Vice Presidents claims that the duties of the office are so minimal that "there's no reason you shouldn't spend the better part of your day in a drunken stupor." The Presidential Library spread depicts the former VP as a janitor.
79	* YourMom: According to the book, Senator [=McCarthy=] responded to Joseph N. Welch's famous question "Have you no sense of decency, sir?" with "Indeed I do, sir, only I seem to have left it on your mother's nightstand." [[BrickJoke Then out came the wiffle-canes]].

Context Literature / AmericaTheBook