Line #336 Funny/Amalgamate


1	[[folder:''Chapter 1'']]
2
3	* Kokichi claims he had a plan. Or rather, he had [[Film/AvengersEndgame "12% of a plan".]] Kaito calls him out for making a reference.
4	* This exchange:
5	--> '''Kaito:''' Don’t do anything stupid while I’m gone or I’ll throttle you.
6	-->'''Kokichi:''' [[TooKinkyToTorture Don’t threaten me with a good time]].
7	* Kaito’s Kokichi impression is so good that not even Kokichi himself can diss it.
8	* Kokichi's utter refusal to go along with Kaito's plan, responding to Kaito's heartfelt hero speech with just a straight-up blunt denial. Not that it stops Kaito.
9
10	[[/folder]]
11
12	[[folder:''Chapter 2'']]
13
14	* True to form, Kokichi continues to crack his wildly-inappropriate-for-the-situation jokes.
15	-->'''Kokichi:''' Yup. I professed my undying love to Shuichi and got rejected. Poor me! I got dumped by Miu and Shuichi in a single day. No wonder I was planning my own suicide! Can’t keep love alive in a killing game!
16	-->''[…]''
17	-->'''Kokichi:''' Rule #2: Don’t take over the mic unless I give you the signal.
18	-->'''Kaito:''' What’s the signal?
19	-->'''Kokichi:''' I’ll scream ‘bukkake’ as loud as possible.
20	-->'''Kaito:''' What?!
21	* Kokichi revealing that he’s left handed. Kaito is indignant, realizing that he had fallen for it like a sucker.
22	-->'''Kokichi:''' Who knows? Maybe I’m lying. Maybe I was born ambidextrous. Maybe I'm righthanded, but I trained myself to be good with my left. You’ll never know.
23	-->'''Kaito:''' I’m never gonna survive a class trial trapped in an Exisal with you. This is some kinda Hell. I died days ago, and now I’m trapped in Hell.
24
25	[[/folder]]
26
27	[[folder:''Chapter 3'']]
28
29	* Once again, Kokichi shows off his breathtaking ability to say the most out-of-pocket things ever.
30	-->'''Kokichi:''' Oh, it’s fine. I’m used to it. I used to be the Ultimate Fashion Model, y’know.
31	-->'''Kaito:''' What, for toddlers?
32	-->'''Kokichi:''' Yup. So, stop staring at me, you ''pedo''.
33	** This one is even better:
34	-->'''Kaito:''' Hey! You take that back! I am not a coward!
35	-->'''Kokichi:''' Suuuuuure. [[TransparentCloset And Tenko was totally straight.]]
36	** He refers to Kaito’s potentially fatal disease as "gross lung cooties".
37	* Kokichi declares that whoever dies first, himself or Kaito, gets first pick on the survivor they haunt, and calls dibs on Shuichi. Kaito then fearfully insists that ghosts ''aren’t'' real.
38	* This gem:
39	-->'''Kokichi:''' Hah! Look at us Pacific Rimming it!
40	-->'''Kaito:''' I don’t like the way you said that.
41
42	[[/folder]]
43
44	[[folder:''Chapter 4'']]
45
46	* During the trial, Maki, who still believes Kokichi is the mastermind, decides to bring up his "beloved Junko Enoshima". Problem is, neither Kaito nor Kokichi ever saw the Flashback Light that led the others to this conclusion, so neither of them have any clue as to who Junko Enoshima even ''is''. You wouldn’t think ''anything'' could throw Kokichi off so much, but the resulting StunnedSilence from him is pretty much the only response he can muster— that’s how bewildered he is. Even better is Kaito being equally confounded. Imagining the both of them crammed into one Exisal with identical expressions of bafflement is the most hysterical mental image in the entire chapter.
47	-->'''Kaito:''' Uh… You got a girlfriend outside the academy you wanna tell me about? Who the fuck is Junko Enoshima?
48	-->'''Kokichi:''' ''(is unable to respond)''
49	* ''"It’s gonna take all the dark matter energy in the universe to keep me from punching this child."''
50	* Himiko is such a BadLiar that even Kaito has to acknowledge how much she’s digging her own grave.
51
52	[[/folder]]
53
54	[[folder:''Chapter 5'']]
55
56	* It comes at a very TearJerker moment, but there’s something darkly funny about this line:
57	--> "Kokichi has a scheme. He ''has'' to be scheming," said Shuichi, unaware of the cruel irony that Kokichi was deteriorating mere meters away from him and didn’t particularly have the stamina left to be ''scheming''.
58	* The SugarWiki/MomentOfAwesome in which Kaito and Kokichi successfully back Monokuma into a corner. It’s even better than in the original timeline. Why? Because this time, we get to see their reactions; ''both'' of them. "Gottem" indeed.
59	** And when they manage to frustrate him, and make him follow along with their scheme using his spite, a barely-clinging-onto-life Kokichi has this to say:
60	--> '''Kokichi:''' S-Suck it, bitch.
61	* If you’re not shedding tears while Kokichi slowly falls unconscious from the poison, you might find it [[BlackComedy disturbingly hilarious]] once he starts rambling about ''robot bears shitting in toilets''. Even better is that somehow, ''ItMakesSenseInContext''. More specifically, [[spoiler: instead of just being delirious ramblings, Kokichi actually provides Kaito with the necessary information to keep him alive long enough to save him.[[labelnote:Context]]Kaito remembers from astronaut training that shuttles are equipped with oxygen masks. Kokichi manages to point out that the Exisals, despite being piloted by the Monokubs, were most likely designed for humans, and might also have an oxygen mask equipped. Kaito indeed finds one such mask.[[/labelnote]]]]
62	-->Y-y'know what… d-doesn't make sense…? B-bears… R-robot b-bears… piloting robots… with h-human-sized pilot seats… R-robot b-bears… storing robots… in hangars with t-toilets… T-tell me, Kaito… if a r-robot bear shits in a bathroom… does it even make a sound…?
63	* This immortal line. Talk about MoodWhiplash.
64	-->'''Kaito:''' F-fuck you! Isn’t it bad enough that Miu was killed by goddamn ''toilet paper''?!
65
66	[[/folder]]
67
68	[[folder:''Chapter 6'']]
69
70	* Shuichi is acting as a human crutch for Kaito, obviously panting from the exertion, when Kaito mentally notes he shouldn’t be panting at ''all'', and thinks he should double up on Shuichi’s training. Apparently, supporting someone taller and heavier than you ''shouldn’t'' be physically taxing.
71	** Predictably, he’s none too pleased about trekking down five flights of stairs while dying of lung cooties.
72	* Upon finding [[spoiler: the antidote for Strike-9, which was in Kokichi’s room the ''entire time'']], Kaito is so relieved that he expresses a desire to [[AngerBornOfWorry throw Kokichi out a window and then feed him cake.]]
73	** Kokichi has the antidote in a crate that was labeled FREE CANDY – LIMIT: ONE PER CUSTOMER, followed by a doodle of a skull and crossbones.
74	* Everyone discusses how to [[spoiler: make Kokichi drink the antidote while unconscious]]. Himiko recounts that she once sleepwalked to her kitchen, drank a glass of water, and threw up on herself.
75	-->'''Tsumugi:''' That’s not very helpful…
76	** Maki, attempting to wake up Kokichi, first just taps him on the face, and then then gives him a [[GetAHoldOfYourselfMan MEGATON slap]], much to Kaito’s umbrage. It doesn’t work, but points for trying.
77	** Finally, Maki comes up with a way to rouse Kokichi: the sternal rub. An incredibly painful technique that, as Kaito recalls, causes pain that can leave one on the floor in tears— [[SuspiciouslySpecificDenial not that Kaito had cried or anything when it happened to him. Nope. Definitely not.]]
78	** Kaito encourages Kokichi to wake up by telling him to "make Death his bitch".
79	* Maki thankfully manages to [[spoiler: force the antidote down Kokichi’s throat in time.]] Maki collects the remaining droplets of antidote in a paper cup. Kaito and the others apparently find this hysterical, and they agree not to tell Kokichi about it, seeing as he’s been through enough and would likely be embarrassed. Keebo, on the other hand, is a little slower to agree.
80	-->'''Keebo:''' Kokichi accused me many times of leaking oil. It’s only fair that he should be equally ridiculed.
81	* The Rantaro effigy hanging over Kokichi’s bed, which Kaito demands an explanation for.
82
83	[[/folder]]
84
85	[[folder:''Chapter 7'']]
86
87	* Kaito never gets an answer about the Rantaro effigy.
88	* Kaito having to recount the entire story from top to bottom. His retelling is heartrending and sad, and yet it’s also extremely funny.
89	** Maki is enraged to think Kaito would kill Kokichi to become the blackened, prompting Keebo to sass her. You really have to have some [[StealthPun titanium balls]] to snark at an angry assassin.
90	-->'''Maki:''' ''(angrily)'' So, you were okay with just ''killing'' him?
91	-->'''Keebo:''' Isn’t that what ''you'' were trying to do?
92	** Himiko apparently thinks that Kaito bleeds glow-in-the-dark blood, since he’s an astronaut. ''How'' she reached this conclusion is unclear, and Tsumugi points out that this doesn’t make sense.
93	** Evidently, Maki isn’t too impressed with the Ultimate Cosplayer.
94	-->"Tsumugi, when you’re finished…"
95
96	-->"Of course! You can count on me!" The cosplayer flashed her a bright smile. "I once sewed an entire Renaissance gown in less than three hours before a competition!"
97
98	-->Maki looked like she wanted to call "bullshit" on that, but bit her tongue.
99	** Kaito admits that he had to drag Kokichi out of the press, kicking and screaming. Himiko’s response? "Well, sometimes you have to kidnap a few eggs to make an omelette." This winds up becoming a RunningGag.
100	-->'''Tsumugi:''' I don’t think an omelet made of kidnapped eggs would taste very good…
101	-->'''Kaito:''' ''(addressing the Rantaro effigy)'' Yo! Pretty boy! What the fuck are these two talking about?
102	-->'''Keebo:''' Um… what’s an omelet?
103
104	[[/folder]]
105
106	[[folder:''Chapter 8'']]
107
108	* [[spoiler: Kokichi briefly emerges from his coma, but quickly falls unconscious again.]] Kaito is a little disappointed.
109	-->'''Maki:''' That little punk’s basically been in a coma. You can’t expect him to wake up, fully coherent, and immediately start reminding you how stupid you are.
110	-->'''Kaito:''' Is it weird that I wanted him to?
111	-->'''Maki:''' [[BrutalHonesty …Yes.]]
112	* Kaito emerges from his own exhaustion-induced coma to find the others arguing over how they made an omelette. Keebo still doesn’t know what it is, and confuses it for omurice because it looks the same. Maki gets fed up, saying she doesn’t care as long as they weren’t made with [[RunningGag kidnapped eggs.]] Turns out they actually got the eggs in question from the doves in Himiko’s lab, and she ''insists'' they weren’t kidnapped.
113	* Maki talks with Shuichi about Kaito’s “stupid hunches”. Kaito is mentally indignant.
114	* Shuichi has to wake up Maki, but can’t do it too suddenly or she’ll probably kill him on reflex, so he chooses to throw a candy wrapper at her from a safe distance. Maki is displeased— not that he woke her up, but because the candy was grape flavored.
115	-->'''Maki:''' Ugh… grape? Really?
116	-->'''Shuichi:''' I – I like grape…
117	-->'''Maki:''' You ''would''. Strawberry’s better.
118	* Keebo sheepishly admits that he [[spoiler: ''stuck his hand into a fireplace''.]] Shuichi is appropriately horrified, and Maki is entirely disappointed.
119	* Kokichi wakes up a third time, this time somewhat lucid and back to his old habits. Near death won’t prevent ''him'' from being a prick.
120	--> '''Kaito:''' Wait, is this really happening? Are you–
121	-->'''Kokichi:''' A half-dog demon, half-human from the Sengoku period who got shot with an arrow by a bitchy, trigger-happy ice queen?
122	-->'''Kaito:''' …What?
123	-->'''Kokichi:''' ''(tiredly)'' Nope. I’m actually a ghost. Boo, bitch.
124	-->''[…]''
125	-->'''Kokichi:''' Look, I tried to go to Heaven… But Tenko was already there. She k-kicked me out for being a… a ‘degenerate male.’ And then I… I fell all the way down to – to Hell… but Keeboy caught me before I got there, and that’s how he… how he burned up his hand…
126	-->''[…]''
127	-->'''Kokichi:''' Ooh, did you end up giving me mouth-to-mouth, Momota? So kinky!
128
129	[[/folder]]
130
131	[[folder:''Chapter 9'']]
132
133	* Kokichi passes out yet again, and Kaito suggests the only way he’d wake up is if you hold a bottle of grape soda under his nose. Smelling salts wake up normal people, but "gremlins only respond to grape soda". Poor [[LiteralMinded Keebo]] thinks he’s being serious.
134	* The others once again start talking about Junko Enoshima, much to Kaito’s annoyance, since he still doesn’t know ''who that is''.
135	* And of course, Kokichi is still being [[{{Troll}} himself]].
136	-->'''Kokichi:''' ''(fake crying)'' Waaaaaah! This is discrimination against comic relief characters! I should call my lawyer and sue this school for everything it’s worth!
137	-->'''Tsumugi:''' Why do you have a lawyer at our age?
138	-->'''Kokichi:''' For all the ''crimes''! Duh!
139	** Later, he calls Kaito a boomer for having seen Film/TheGodfather (despite implying that [[HypocriticalHumor he’s seen the movie himself]]), and Kaito points out that they’re the same age. Kokichi claims that he’s [[BlatantLies "secretly a three-thousand-year-old dragon trapped in a human body"]] (to which Himiko exclaims "I knew it"), saying that dragons don’t watch human movies. They go back and forth so much that an annoyed Maki has to interrupt them.
140	* Monokuma mockingly recounts how a feverish, half-conscious Kokichi threw himself into Shuichi’s arms, and [[ShipperOnDeck Tsumugi]] becomes quite invested. Seems like she has a new OTP.
141	* "Hmm, if that’s the case, the mastermind sure likes to make dumb references..." What’s so funny about this line? [[spoiler: This is ''actually how Kokichi susses out the mastermind'', a.k.a. Tsumugi. Who knew her references would come back to bite her in the ass.]]
142	* Kokichi reminds Kaito of when the latter tried to have him killed during Gonta’s trial, and then punched him after the fact. Poor Kaito is still incredibly ashamed, but refuses to let Kokichi weapon use his guilt because "Kaito could do that just fine on his own, thank you very much."
143	* Kokichi has a will in an envelope that says [[BlatantLies "THIS ISN'T A WILL"]].
144	* Combined with SugarWiki/HeartWarmingMoments, Shuichi’s [[{{Adorkable}} utterly excited gushing]] over all the calculations and predictions Kokichi has on his whiteboard. It’s so damn cute it just makes you smile.
145	** He’s also a fan of Anime/DeathNote, which is even cuter.
146	* Another example that also lines up with SugarWiki/HeartWarmingMoments is Himiko getting Kokichi to smile again using her magic tricks. She manages to get the Joker card in Kaito’s pocket, then tells him to "pay up, Fool", and Kaito has to hand over a coin that had somehow gotten into his palm. If anything can get Kokichi to act like himself again, it’s laughing at Kaito’s expense.
147	** Her other trick involves placing her hat on Kaito, and when he takes it off, there’s a ''dove'' resting on his head named [[VisualNovel/HatofulBoyfriend Okosan]]. Tsumugi asks if this is the dove she kidnapped eggs from, and Himiko again insists she asked for permission before taking them.
148	-->''Kokichi blinked owlishly, unable to comprehend the intricacies of Bird Law.''
149	* Keebo can recite ''every line of dialogue in ''WesternAnimation/WallE''.'' Kaito points out there’s not much dialogue in that movie, and Keebo is offended, saying that it’s an important piece of representation for his people.
150	* While waiting for the time limit to run out, Shuichi asks how much time they have, Kokichi says they have four minutes and twenty six seconds. Much to everyone’s shock, he’s ''exactly right''. This causes Keebo to pout.
151	-->'''Keebo:''' Even ''I'' don’t have a clock function…
152	* Monokuma is attacking the dorms, and he gives us this treasure:
153	-->'''Monokuma:''' If a lion gets injured, I say the rest of the pride’s got an obligation to eat ‘em! That’s how us bears do it, after all! I grilled my widdle cubs with fava beans and a nice chianti!
154	-->'''Tsumugi:''' Th-that’s sick!
155	-->'''Himiko:''' You’re a terrible parent!
156
157	[[/folder]]
158
159	[[folder:''Chapter 10'']]
160
161	* Kaito lists loudly slurping noodles as one of the most annoying sounds in the world. Kokichi figured this out in a day, and had apparently been eating ramen exclusively every day while staring Kaito dead in the eyes. Talk about petty.
162	* The arbitrarily resurrected Monokubs. They claim they want to be the students’ friends, and Kokichi complains that he doesn’t want to be friends with robots. Keebo naturally calls out robophobia, but says he’ll forgive Kokichi this time, since the Monokubs are very poor representations of his people.
163	* Everyone takes a moment to rest, and Kokichi is crying. Kaito asks what’s wrong, and Kokichi says that his life is over because Keebo is ''cooler'' than him. Kaito is very deeply unamused. [[spoiler: Though it ties in with TearJerker because it’s most likely a lie, and Kokichi is just trying to hide how much pain he’s in.]]
164	* Shuichi suggest Keebo use his new weapons to break down Rantaro’s door. This prompts everyone to speculate on what his talent might have been.
165	-->'''Kokichi:''' I wanna place bets! My money’s on the Ultimate K-Pop Idol!\
166	'''Tsumugi:''' Oh! Maybe he was the Ultimate Actor! Like, for television dramas!\
167	'''Himiko:''' No way… He was the Ultimate Assassin for sure.\
168	'''Tsumugi:''' We… already have one of those.\
169	'''Kaito:''' What kinda assassin dies first in a killing game?\
170	'''Shuichi:''' …A really bad one?\
171	'''Kokichi:''' That’s just meeeaaan! I didn’t know my beloved Shumai was a victim blamer!
172	* Since there’s no other way to get Kokichi up the stairs fast enough, Keebo winds up having to scoop him up like a toddler and ''fly'' him up to Rantaro’s room, much to Kokichi’s distress.
173	-->'''Kokichi:''' S-someone call the police! I’m being kidnapped by a Transformer! [[TakeThat S-stop him before he makes another terrible movie!]]
174	** Kaito lampshades the fact that the only way to make Kokichi do anything is to pick him up and force him.
175	* Maki roasting Kaito while making an uncharacteristic attempt at humor.
176	-->'''Maki:''' Kaito’s like one of those windup toys. You pull the string, and a bunch of cliché superhero catchphrases come out.
177	-->'''Kaito:''' Hey! I just speak from the heart! Since when is that a crime?!
178	* The gang finally make it to Rantaro’s lab.
179	-->"Nyeh… I dunno if I wanna be in here…" Himiko shuddered. "This place isn’t just cursed, it’s haunted!"
180
181	-->"Sh-shut up!" Kaito hissed, shivering – [[SuspiciouslySpecificDenial because of the cold, not because he was scared!]]
182	* Kokichi still being Kokichi.
183	-->'''Kokichi:''' Look! There’s a laptop! Let’s see if it’s got any sick porn!\
184	''[…]''\
185	'''Shuichi:''' It… looks like there’s only a single file. And it’s… a video…?\
186	'''Kokichi:''' Please be porn, please be porn, please be porn…\
187	''[…]''\
188	'''Kokichi:''' I guess in the end, he was the Ultimate Dumbass. Oh, just kidding! That’s Kaito.\
189	'''Kaito:''' Hey!\
190	''[…]''\
191	'''Shuichi:''' How does your inner voice have information you don’t have?\
192	'''Kokichi:''' Oh, I know! K1-B0’s speaking to Atua! And K1-B0’s our robot prophet! The robot lord and savior! God-Bot Version 3.0!
193	* Kokichi demands a favor from Shuichi as tells him to come closer to tell him the secret. Shuichi naturally looks timorous, and Kokichi has to reassure him that he isn’t going to lick his face or anything.
194
195	[[/folder]]
196
197	[[folder:''Chapter 11'']]
198
199	* Monodam apparently comes by a lot to pet the doves in Himiko’s lab. Weirdest mental image ''ever''.
200	* This doesn’t even need to be elaborated on.
201	-->“They’ve been gone a while. I did not think there would be much to explore in the lab of a cosplayer.”
202
203	-->Had Kokichi been awake, Kaito was quite sure he would’ve said, “shaaaaade.”
204	* We see a [[AmbiguousSituation maybe real, maybe not real]] flashback of Kokichi at the orphanage where the characters (presumably) met for the first time, and Kokichi… [[PsychopathicManchild hardly behaves any different.]]
205	* Rantaro’s lab gets destroyed and in the midst of that destruction, Shuichi lets out a curse that we don’t get to hear, but that shocks everyone else.
206
207	[[/folder]]
208
209	[[folder:''Chapter 12'']]
210
211	* Kokichi is in the middle of [[spoiler: trying to save Kaito’s life.]] But he’s still being himself as he does so.
212
213	-->'''Kokichi:''' ''(referring to a [[spoiler: bottle of antidote]])'' Some kinda calcium gluconate solution, I think. Somewhere between three and five percent? How should I know? I’m not the Ultimate Chemist!\
214	'''Himiko:''' Nyeh… that sounds like a magic potion for chemical burns…\
215	'''Tsumugi:''' Um, why in the world would a mage need to know that?
216	** He tells Maki to "slow [her] Maki Roll".
217	* Yet again, Kokichi is suspected of being the mastermind, and now of poisoning Kaito. Kaito states that he believes in Kokichi, and when asked why…
218	-->'''Maki and Kokichi:''' Because he’s an idiot.
219	* Kokichi’s penchant for making PublicSecretMessage codes for Kaito becomes frustrating for Kaito, who wonders how many times he’s going to joke about shit to save his lives.
220	* There’s something absurdly funny about just how matter-of-factly Kokichi reveals that [[spoiler: ''Tsumugi poisoned him'',]] like someone casually and cheerfully commenting on the weather. If that isn’t GallowsHumor, nothing is.
221	** The others outline the evidence to this claim.
222	-->'''Kaito:''' He’s feverish again. Like, ''really'' feverish.\
223	'''Kokichi:''' You can just say I’m hot. We already been knew.\
224	'''Kaito:''' Shut up! This is serious! Do you think we’re stupid, Kokichi?!\
225	'''Kokichi:''' Do you actually want me to answer that question?\
226	'''Keebo:''' ''(weary)'' Please don’t…
227	* [[ItMakesSenseInContext Without context]] this line is damn funny.
228	-->'''Himiko:''' You [[spoiler: poisoned Kokichi]] 'cause of ''astrology''?!
229	** And this one:
230	-->'''Himiko:''' Y-you [[spoiler: poisoned Kokichi]] 'cause of ''fashion''?!
231	* ''Kaito. Watches. Sailor. Moon.''
232	-->'''Kokichi:''' I… have no idea what to do with this information. I can’t even make a Uranus joke right now…
233	* Once again, Kokichi manages to get the time correct without even checking a clock (12:42 pm).
234	-->'''Shuichi:''' On the dot! Kokichi, how do you do that?\
235	'''Kokichi:''' Hm? Didn’t I tell you already? I’m a cyborg… A neural-net processor. A learning computer. That’s why Keeboy and I can never get along. Robots think my people are impure half-breeds…\
236	'''Keebo:''' That is unbelievably robophobic! I would never discriminate against–\
237	'''Kaito:''' Wait, it’s been four hours?!
238
239	[[/folder]]
240
241	[[folder:''Chapter 13'']]
242
243	* Kokichi isn’t Kokichi if he’s not using humor as a coping mechanism. So much so that Kaito has to physically restrain himself from punching him.
244
245	-->'''Kaito:''' Are you on a mission to win the Biggest Douche in the Universe Award today or somethin'?\
246	'''Kokichi:''' Oh, was I nominated again this year?
247	* Kaito comments that dealing with Kokichi is like domesticating a feral cat. Kokichi responds "Nay, I’m actually a horse!” Kaito thinks it’s his dumbest joke so far.
248
249	[[/folder]]
250
251	[[folder:''Chapter 14'']]
252
253	* Kokichi is delirious from fever, and Maki has to explain to Keebo what delirium means for humans. Keebo says that the same thing can happen to robots.
254	-->'''Keebo:''' One time, my internal fan stopped working, and I overheated. As a result, my CPU scrambled, and I asked Professor Idabashi if he could tell the birds outside to turn down the sun.
255	* After Kokichi falls unconscious once more, Maki gives Kaito a gun, specifically an AMP-69, and tells him to use it to test if Kokichi is coherent or not when he wakes up.
256	-->'''Keebo:''' By ''shooting'' him?\
257	'''Maki:''' No, you idiots. We’ll know Kokichi’s coherent when we tell him Kaito’s carrying an AMP-69, and Kokichi says [[LOL69 'nice'.]]
258	** She winds up being right. This causes her to actually ''laugh'', which in turn bewilders Kokichi.
259	* Once Kokichi wakes up, the first thing he does is, of course, antagonize Kaito. The poor bastard can help but argue with Kokichi.
260	-->'''Kaito:''' How is it possible that you’ve been awake for five seconds, and I already wanna punch your lights out…?\
261	'''Kokichi:''' Yay… I beat my old record…
262	* Maki attempts to apologize to Kokichi, saying that her actions were unforgivable, condemning him to a slow, painful death rather than a swift execution… how she failed as an assassin… how she should have exterminated the threat immediately… needless to say, Kokichi isn’t too impressed— the girl is [[ComicallyMissingThePoint comically missing her OWN point.]]
263	* And the boys continue to argue.
264	-->'''Kaito:''' Y’know, I’ve got you all figured out, kid. The worse you feel, the more shitty, archaic memes start rollin’ outta your mouth.\
265	'''Kokichi:''' [[NoYou You’re a shitty, archaic meme…]]\
266	'''Kaito:''' What does that even ''mean''?!
267	* A few people might find themselves snickering at Kokichi’s [[{{Pun}} joke.]] "What do you call a lawyer who gets hired by an asexual client? [[spoiler: An ACE attorney."]]
268	* Everyone’s absolutely stunned reactions to ''Shuichi'' [[SugarWiki/MomentOfAwesome sniping Monotaro with a single shot.]] Himiko is described as staring at the detective line he grew a third arm.
269	* Kaito verbally flipping the bird at Monokuma before getting into the Exisal. Yet another SugarWiki/MomentOfAwesome.
270	-->'''Kaito:''' Oy! Headmaster!\
271	'''Monokuma:''' Eh? The heck do you want, Spaceman?\
272	'''Kaito:''' I just wanted to tell you something!\
273	'''Monokuma:''' Yeah? And what’s that?\
274	'''Kaito:''' [[DidYouJustFlipOffCthulhu Get fucked!]] ''(slams cockpit shut)''
275
276	[[/folder]]
277
278	[[folder:''Chapter 15'']]
279
280	* Monodam shows up with birdseed for Himiko’s doves, trying to feed them. Kaito is surprised that Himiko was being serious about that.
281	-->'''Himiko:''' Why would I joke about something like that?\
282	'''Shuichi:''' B-Because it ''sounds'' like a joke…?
283	* In a rather long, frankly mind screwy scene, Monosuke, Monodam, and Monokuma get into a family spat that results in Monosuke murdering the other two. Everyone else is stunned, but Maki says what everyone in the audience is most likely thinking.
284	-->'''Keebo:''' He committed fratricide and patricide in less than thirty seconds…!\
285	'''Maki:''' Good.
286	* And this moment, in another stunning example of BlackComedy.
287	-->As if to prove just how okay they were – or to add insult to injury – the doves swooped down and began happily eating birdseed off Monodam’s corpse.
288	* According to Kaito, he’s flexible enough to fit his entire foot in his mouth. Kokichi chants for him to do just that, much to Shuichi’s exasperation.
289	* The group goes into the secret underground tunnel to find a massive lair decorated in hideously bright, saccharine pink. Kaito reacts with disgust. Shuichi remarks that it’s much bigger than he expected. Kokichi’s timeless response?
290	-->'''Kokichi:''' ThatsWhatSheSaid.
291	* The Motherkuma gears itself up for its introduction, but no one wants to pull off the curtain because it might be a searchlight. An offended Motherkuma exclaims, "I’m not a Searchlight! And don’t compare me to such a [[LampshadeHanging half-baked, last-minute plot contrivance!]] I’ve been here since the beginning!"
292	* There’s blood on the Survivor Perk Monopad, and Kokichi suggest that Keebo put it in his mouth and use the [[VideoGame/DetroitBecomeHuman DNA sensors on his tongue.]] Suffice to say, that’s not a viable option.
293	-->'''Keebo:''' I don’t even ''have'' a tongue.\
294	'''Himiko:''' I bet [[LovableSexManiac Miu]] hated that.
295	* In a flashback, Kokichi makes the word "jellyfish" his CovertDistressCode. Why? He claims he doesn’t trust them because they’re planning to take over the world.
296	** Kaito calls him out and points out that his biggest fear is bugs. He knows this because Kokichi freaked out over one.
297	-->'''Kokichi:''' [[BlatantLies It was threatening me! With a tiny knife!]]
298
299	[[/folder]]
300
301	[[folder:''Chapter 16'']]
302
303	* And once again, Kokichi is forced to fall into the mastermind role. He claims he has surveillance on the whole school, and knows what everyone does in their alone time… and this causes [[CovertPervert Tsumugi to yelp.]]
304	-->'''Tsumugi:''' Has Kokichi r-really seen me with my Izuru body pillow…?
305	* Kokichi refers to Miu’s lab as "Caligula’s whore house".
306	* Miu has a strange metal box hidden in her lab, which Keebo attempts to open. When asked what’s inside, Kokichi claims that it’s "toys". A horrified Kaito shouts at Keebo to ''not'' open it.
307	* Kokichi actually calls Keebo by his name, and Keebo panics, thinking Kokichi is already dying.
308	* Miu’s ''letter''. It’s written in her… [[SirSwearsALot distinctive]] [[DoubleEntendre style]] of speaking, so naturally it veers into this territory, if you ignore the TearJerker and SugarWiki/HeartWarmingMoments. Bonus points when you remember that Keebo is the one reading it, forcing you to imagine Miu’s words being spoken in his voice. See below. (Warning: NSFW)
309	-->'''Miu’s letter:''' [[spoiler: Listen up, robo-slut! If you’re reading this, then that means I fucked up – so, you better not be reading this, because I, the gorgeous girl genius, am incapable of fucking up. But if the statistically impossible, worst-case scenario comes to pass, then this gift’s for you. It’s the gift of life – or, in your case, a backup drive. Yeah, that’s right, I managed to replicate your brain ‘cause I’m a god-tier fuckin’ genius. Oh, and I have perfect tits? I know, life ain’t fair if you’re anyone other than me. Anyway, you don’t know this, but yesterday, during one of our “sessions,” I backed up all your memories onto this drive. So, if my plan succeeds, and I get to leave this fucking dump, I can resurrect you after all those limp dicks and glory holes are finally punished. I’ve got a spare drive with me, but I can’t take it into the Virtual World, so this one’s a backup in case, well… I guess if you’re reading this, then that means something definitely went wrong. So, jam this hard drive into your CPU slot and back dat ass up. I imprinted a rudimentary Alter Ego of myself onto the drive, so once you’ve got me inserted as deep as possible, I’ll walk you through the process so you can update the memories again. Oh, and if some fuck wad other than Kee-boner is reading this, you’d better be a fuckin’ genius, too, ‘cause if you don’t use this drive to bring my cyber boy back to life, I’m gonna haunt the shit outta you. I will be in every sex dream you ever have for the rest of your life, and you will not enjoy it. Or maybe you will, ‘cause this bomb ass ghost pussy is gonna fuck the soul right outta your—]]
310	-->'''Kaito:''' Jesus… She, uh… wrote exactly the way she talked, huh?
311	-->'''Miu’s letter:''' [[spoiler: P.S. K1-B0, I will also haunt you if you don’t stop putting yourself down. You are literally the most incredible piece of machinery I’ve ever seen, and you’re an even cooler person. You’re gonna do great things someday. I mean, not as great as me, obviously, but still pretty fuckin’ cool. So, stop doubting yourself and fuckin’ own it already! You are literally metal as fuck, and don’t you ever forget that! Oh, and P.P.S. if that nasty, ankle biting, sword swallowing, cum guzzling, clown fucking little virgin is somehow still alive… tell that little fetus that I’m sorry.]]
312	* The codeword for the relay of information via flashback lights? "This world is yours, Kokichi Ouma." And then "bukkake", just because Kokichi is Kokichi.
313	* Kaito forced Kokichi to promise that he’ll do everything in his power to survive long enough to escape. Kokichi promises… only for Kaito to realize that Kokichi had crossed his fingers. Needless to say, he’s ''pissed''.
314
315	[[/folder]]
316
317	[[folder:''Chapter 17'']]
318
319	* When the VoiceOfTheLegion appears via Monokumas hacked by the outside world, poor Kaito is terrified and has to ask Keebo if ghosts are actually real.
320	* Kokichi still being unhinged.
321	-->'''Kokichi:''' ''(after Shuichi startled him)'' Th-that was so mean, Shumai…! You snuck up on me on purpose, didn’t you?! I always heard detectives were sneaky, but you’re just a big jerk!\
322	'''Shuichi:''' I-I said I was sorry! Is there anything I can do?!\
323	'''Kokichi:''' Yeah! Fall to your knees right now and commit seppuku! Kaito, you finish him off! That’s an order!\
324	''[…]''\
325	'''Kokichi:''' Who the hell’s ridin’ me? Your mom, probably!\
326	'''Kaito:''' That would be pretty miraculous, considering she’s dead.\
327	'''Kokichi:''' [[CrossesTheLineTwice Hmm, yeah, that’s probably more Kiyo’s thing.]]\
328	''[…]''\
329	'''Kokichi:''' Ghosts are allowed to have sex, and if you say they’re not, Miu’s gonna haunt you! Is that what you want? To get haunted by a slutty specter, or a dirty demon, or a bawdy banshee, or a, um… A pornographic poltergeist…? Nah, that’s too many syllables. How about a—\
330	'''Kaito:''' Kokichi, if you don’t shut the fuck up, I’m gonna throw you down the stairs.\
331	'''Kokichi:''' Oh, good! If you throw me down the stairs, I’ll die, and then I can come back as a salacious spook, or a filthy phantom, or a—\
332	'''Kaito:''' Kokichi, I swear to God…
333	* Kokichi calling Keebo [[VideoGame/FiveNightsAtFreddys Balloon Boy.]]
334	* The others try and explore the final room in the school, but Kokichi has to remind them that he can’t walk on his own.
335	-->'''Kokichi:''' Hold your horses! And by horses, I mean me. I’m the horse!
336	* Kaito gives Tsumugi an ''epic'' TheReasonYouSuckSpeech, but it only results in him coughing up blood again and collapsing.
337	-->'''Himiko:''' Nyeh… that’s a ''lotta'' blood.\
338	'''Kokichi:''' And a [[ClusterFBomb lotta tips in the swear jar!]]
339	* Kokichi’s password to his Ultimate Lair: [[LeeroyJenkins "Leerooooy Jeeeeeeeenkins!"]]
340	* Once again, Kokichi tells another fib, this time about Shuichi being a Twilight vampire who bit and resurrected him. Himiko believes this, even though Shuichi insists that he’s ''not'' a vampire. His [[EeriePaleSkinnedBrunette appearance]] probably doesn’t do him any favors.
341	-->'''Maki:''' Could’ve fooled me. Is that why you always made him train at night, Kaito? To keep him out of the sun?
342
343	[[/folder]]
344
345	[[folder:''Chapter 18'']]
346

Context Funny / Amalgamate