| 1 | [[quoteright:350:https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/basebook.png]] |
| 2 | [[caption-width-right:350:'''"DOWNLOADING A PICTURE ON BASEBOOK IS''' '''''DRAINING OUR ENTIRE POWER SUPPLY?!?!"''''']] |
| 3 | [[foldercontrol]] |
| 4 | |
| 5 | [[folder:Season 11]] |
| 6 | [[quoteright:350:https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/what_the_fuck___season_11.png]] |
| 7 | [[caption-width-right:350:Dos Point Oh, meet your original.]] |
| 8 | [[AC: Trailer]] |
| 9 | * The [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4P-L_k_6Ous teaser for Season 11.]] To elaborate, it begins with two random soldiers talking, with one of them (Dennis) giving a rather [[BuffySpeak truncated]] summary of everything the Blood Gulch Crew's been through up to this point, while his friend (Jerry) keeps demanding to know how this is relevant to them: |
| 10 | -->'''Jerry:''' Dennis?\ |
| 11 | '''Dennis:''' Jerry?\ |
| 12 | '''Jerry:''' I love you.\ |
| 13 | '''Dennis:''' O...kay...what?\ |
| 14 | '''Jerry:''' You are my friend.\ |
| 15 | '''Dennis:''' I know.\ |
| 16 | '''Jerry:''' I ''enjoy'' our Tete-a-tetes.\ |
| 17 | '''Dennis:''' Our what-a-whats?\ |
| 18 | '''Jerry:''' But if you do not tell me what the ''hell'' all this has to do with ''us'' in the next ''five seconds,'' I AM GOING TO SHOOT YOU! |
| 19 | ** Eventually, it turns out that the two guys were supposed to greet the ship that was transporting the BGC...and that said ship hasn't shown up. Naturally, Jerry starts wondering where they are. Cue the GilliganCut to the BGC standing before the smoking wreckage of a massive transport, now marooned on an alien world. And the more things change, the more they stay the same: |
| 20 | --->'''Caboose:''' [[SuspiciouslySpecificDenial Not my fault.]]\ |
| 21 | '''Tucker:''' ''Absolutely'' your fault.\ |
| 22 | '''Sarge:''' ''(Chuckles)'' Well, looks like we're gonna be here a while; [[HereWeGoAgain better build some bases!]] |
| 23 | *** Caboose is right for once. As far as we know, it really wasn't his fault. |
| 24 | |
| 25 | [[AC: Episode 1: One-Zero-One]] |
| 26 | * When Sarge decides to remodel the Reds' new base, whats his tool of choice? The Blues' tank, which he happily uses to knock out a few walls. With Grif still inside, of course. |
| 27 | --> "Possession is nine-tenths of the law! The other tenth is a tank. And I've got both." |
| 28 | * Wash seems to have fully assimilated as the group's OnlySaneMan. |
| 29 | -->'''Wash:''' Sarge, the reds and blues aren't fighting. We're just camped at opposite ends of the canyon...[[NotHelpingYourCase in color-divided teams...while heavily armed.]]\ |
| 30 | '''Sarge:''' True. But have you ever considered that fighting is just in our nature? It's almost instinctual. [[InsaneTrollLogic If we're not constantly trying to stab each other in the back, we'll surely die.]]\ |
| 31 | '''Wash:''' Dear God, I hate you.\ |
| 32 | '''Sarge:''' ''(Cheerfully)'' [[ComicallyMissingThePoint That's the spirit!]] |
| 33 | |
| 34 | [[AC: Episode 2: Get Your Tucks in a Row]] |
| 35 | * Wash reminds Tucker that's he's been told not to let anyone touch the tank. |
| 36 | -->'''Wash:''' What is the one thing I tell you each and every morning?\ |
| 37 | '''Tucker:''' "Wake up."\ |
| 38 | '''Wash:''' The other thing.\ |
| 39 | '''Tucker:''' "For the love of god, stop sleeping naked." |
| 40 | * In an argument, Wash insinuates that Tucker caused the crash. |
| 41 | -->'''Wash:''' I have a hard time believing that thousands of well trained crew members were to blame for the incident.\ |
| 42 | '''Tucker:''' Well, they definitely didn't survive it! [[GallowsHumor Ha HA!]] Ha... ''(coughs)''\ |
| 43 | '''Wash:''' [[DudeNotFunny Wow.]]\ |
| 44 | '''Tucker:''' Y... yeah.\ |
| 45 | '''Wash:''' Are you proud of yourself?\ |
| 46 | '''Tucker:''' ...No. |
| 47 | |
| 48 | [[AC: Episode 3: Barriers to Entry]] |
| 49 | * When Caboose asks Wash if he thinks if Church misses him, Wash has a flashback to Caboose babbling on and on while Church yells at him to shut up. |
| 50 | * During a discussion on Grif's nonexistent construction skills: |
| 51 | -->'''Sarge:''' I asked you to give me a proper erection, not to stiff me!\ |
| 52 | '''Simmons:''' ''So'' glad Donut's not here. |
| 53 | * This interaction between Tucker and Wash: |
| 54 | -->'''Wash:''' [[DrillSergeantNasty I said sprints, Private Tucker!]]\ |
| 55 | '''Tucker:''' I'M GOING TO SPIT IN YOUR NEXT MEAL!! |
| 56 | * Caboose taking a walk by himself [[BlatantLies isn't depressing at all]]! |
| 57 | |
| 58 | [[AC: Episode 4: Heavy Mettle]] |
| 59 | * Caboose investigates a mysterious sound in cave: |
| 60 | -->'''Caboose:''' Hello!\ |
| 61 | '''Caboose's Echo:''' Hello!\ |
| 62 | '''Caboose:''' Oh. That was just me. That was stupid. Have a nice day!\ |
| 63 | '''Caboose's Echo:''' Thanks, you too!\ |
| 64 | '''Caboose:''' Well, I am a very pleasant person. |
| 65 | * Washington tries to whip some discipline into Tucker. It starts out like this: |
| 66 | -->'''Wash:''' Tucker, in basic training, there's a point when [[DrillSergeantNasty the drill sergeant attempts to break his or her soldiers,]] so that they might overcome their civilian mind-set and focus on the responsibility and selflessness that comes with being a true soldier.\ |
| 67 | '''Tucker:''' Uh, bro, I went through basic ''ages'' ago. True soldier, standing right here!\ |
| 68 | '''Wash:''' What is the UNSC motto?\ |
| 69 | '''Tucker:''' When in doubt, rub one out!\ |
| 70 | '''Wash:''' [[TranquilFury I am going to break you, Private Tucker.]] |
| 71 | * From there, Wash has Tucker run an obstacle course. High points include: |
| 72 | ** Wash's idea of a starting pistol-- shooting Tucker in the ass. |
| 73 | ** Tucker develops inexplicable hatred towards cones. |
| 74 | ** Tucker steps on some huge land-mines. |
| 75 | ** Tucker gets shot at from some off-screen source, with no idea where it's coming from. |
| 76 | ** Wash's obstacle course somehow sends Tucker running through a massive war zone from Halo 4 ("Who are these people!?"), and hurtling down the Warthog escape tunnel from the first Halo game! ("What the fuck is going on!?") |
| 77 | ** Wash's assessment of Tucker's elapsed time? [[DamnedByFaintPraise "...Adequate. For a beginner."]] |
| 78 | ** Caboose shows up and runs the same course. ''In about two seconds.'' While babbling to himself at light-speed. |
| 79 | --->'''Caboose''': Okaythatwasfungottadostuffdon'taskanymorequestionsthankyougoodbyebye!\ |
| 80 | '''Wash:''' ...I... think that's enough training for today. |
| 81 | * Simmons is being driven to his breaking point by Grif's laziness, as the two are essentially room-mates due to Sarge's decision to divide Red Base into two sides. |
| 82 | * Sarge insists on using an imaginary door to cross the invisible boundary between his side of the base and Simmons and Grif's side. |
| 83 | * Simmons suggests using their spare robot kit to help Wash repair the comm tower. Sarge dismisses this idea... on the conclusion that building a whole ''robot'' to help fix the comm tower will be ''much'' more efficient. |
| 84 | * Washington and Grif go into the second floor of Red Base to look for the tool box. |
| 85 | -->'''Wash:''' Are those my socks?\ |
| 86 | '''Grif:''' [[{{Squick}} Yeah, but you probably don't want those back.]]\ |
| 87 | |
| 88 | [[AC: Episode 5: A Real Fixer Upper]] |
| 89 | * While "helping" Washington repair the comm tower, Tucker gives a surprisingly accurate description of how the GPS (Galactic Positioning System) on the crashed spaceship was supposed to have worked. Naturally, Washington asks him how he knows about this. Cue a flashback with a disinterested-sounding Tucker listening to a crew member give the exact same speech... until he decides to try hitting on the female pilot. Which somehow results in alarms going off. Back in the present: |
| 90 | --> '''Tucker:''' [[SuspiciouslySpecificDenial I... read it in a book?]]\ |
| 91 | '''Washington:''' I don't believe you. Then again, I don't really care.\ |
| 92 | '''Tucker:''' ''(Sigh of relief)'' |
| 93 | * Washington can't find his soldering tool. Tucker asks if he thinks Red Team took it. Washington proceeds to pick up a shotgun and deliver a hilariously tongue-in-cheek imitation of Sarge: |
| 94 | --> '''Washington:''' Men, it appears our ''shitty'' fortifications aren't meeting my ''ridiculous'' standards! Let's steal Washington's tank and fire it at our walls! ''That'll fix it!'' ''(beat, in his normal voice)'' Yes, I think the Reds took it. |
| 95 | * This leads to Washington expressing ''why'' he's so wound up-- Tucker is ''right.'' (More specifically, that someone should have found them by now...) |
| 96 | * Lopez 2.0 is online. And guess what? He ''still'' speaks only Spanish! |
| 97 | -->'''Sarge:''' Huh. That is an unfortunate coincidence. |
| 98 | -->'''Grif:''' Spanish. Why is it fucking Spanish? Why not French? Or German Or [[Franchise/{{Halo}} Sangheili?]] |
| 99 | * The new Lopez actually seems to have a rather friendly disposition, compared to the original. [[SurroundedByIdiots Knowing the Reds,]] though, this Mr. Nice Guy attitude is going to be gone by the end of the season. [[spoiler:And how...while the original Lopez only became bitter and sarcastic, 2.0 ends up trying to ''kill them all!'']] |
| 100 | |
| 101 | [[AC: Episode 6: S.O.S.]] |
| 102 | * Caboose introduces his new friend: Freckles the Mantis! Cue MassOhCrap from the Reds and Blues, and a ''whimper'' from Grif. Just to properly emphasize the reaction, you could easily tell that if they weren't wearing helmets, jaws would have hit the floor. |
| 103 | -->'''Freckles:''' ''(Targeting Grif and Simmons)'' Enemy soldiers detected.\ |
| 104 | '''Caboose:''' Oh, those aren't enemies, Freckles! Those are Grif and Simmons! Our enemy! |
| 105 | * The introduction comes after they finally make contact with someone on the outside (even though it was Donut). The two teams are ecstatic and make plans to eat all of their rations and waste all their bullets ([[OnlySaneMan while Wash tries to talk them out of it]]), then [[{{Cloudcuckoolander}} Caboose]] comes up to them with his own good news. |
| 106 | * Wash has some trouble remembering Donut. |
| 107 | -->'''Washington:''' Who is Donut again?\ |
| 108 | '''Simmons:''' [[RealMenWearPink Cheery guy? Pink armor?]]\ |
| 109 | '''Grif:''' [[TheDitz Kind of stupid?]]\ |
| 110 | '''Tucker:''' [[AmbiguouslyGay And a little...]]\ |
| 111 | '''Washington:''' Wait, [[ContinuityNod did I shoot him once?]]\ |
| 112 | '''Grif:''' Bingo.\ |
| 113 | '''Washington:''' Got it. And he's competent enough to trust with our lives?\ |
| 114 | '''Donut:''' ''(on the radio)'' Sorry, did you say five, or nine?\ |
| 115 | '''Sarge:''' [[EpicFail I said eight.]]\ |
| 116 | '''Donut:''' Oh!\ |
| 117 | '''Washington:''' [[ThisIsGonnaSuck ...Right.]] |
| 118 | * And before the radio starts working, the guys have a little exchange on the multiple uses of the [[ThisIsForEmphasisBitch B-word...]] |
| 119 | -->'''Grif:''' ''(Regarding Tucker doing squats after Wash ordered him to)'' Ha! Who's the bitch now?\ |
| 120 | '''Tucker:''' [[IBangedYourMom Your sister was my bitch, if I remember correctly!]]\ |
| 121 | '''Grif:''' [[BigBrotherInstinct What did you say to me, bitch?]]\ |
| 122 | '''Washington:''' ''(Trying to get the radio to work)'' ''No one'' is a bitch! Now, both of you be quiet!\ |
| 123 | ''({{Beat}})''\ |
| 124 | '''Grif:''' Simmons is ''kind of'' [[YesMan a bitch.]]\ |
| 125 | '''Simmons:''' Hey! What the fuck?!\ |
| 126 | '''Sarge:''' Ah, can it, Private Bitch.\ |
| 127 | '''Simmons:''' ''(Resigned)'' Yes, sir...\ |
| 128 | '''Grif and Tucker:''' ''(Smugly)'' Bitch.\ |
| 129 | '''Washington:''' ''(Losing his temper)'' I said, ''(hits the radio)'' ''be QUIET!'' |
| 130 | * And oddly enough, the radio starts ''working'' right then. With some help from Lopez 2.0, of course, but still... |
| 131 | |
| 132 | [[AC: Episode 7: Can I Keep It?]] |
| 133 | * Grif forcing Simmons to confront the strange reality that none of them are able to ''not'' hold a weapon (due to it being a machinima). This creeps Simmons out enough that he forgets why he was talking to Grif; to try and make him take out the garbage. Even better when it's revealed that this was all a plan by Grif in order to get out of taking out the trash. |
| 134 | * The Blues discuss why Freckles' robot-type is called a Mantis; |
| 135 | -->'''Tucker:''' Wait, why Mantis?\ |
| 136 | '''Wash:''' Well, you see those legs? They kinda resemble the legs of a praying mantis.\ |
| 137 | '''Tucker:''' No they don't.\ |
| 138 | '''Wash:''' Then, maybe it's the head shape?\ |
| 139 | '''Caboose:''' Yeah, maybe it's because during the act of procreation they rip off the head of their mate's body and devour it. It's like an act of sexual cannibalism.\ |
| 140 | '''Wash:''' Eugh, what?!\ |
| 141 | '''Tucker:''' Ah, I dated worse.\ |
| 142 | '''Caboose:''' Yeah, I-I call him Freckles cause of the spots on his nose.\ |
| 143 | '''Tucker:''' Well, shit, actually, I have to give it to Caboose on this one. Robot definitely looks more like Freckles than a Mantis. |
| 144 | |
| 145 | [[AC: Episode 8: The Grass Is Greener. The Blues Are Bluer]] |
| 146 | * Tucker provides this gem while complaining about Wash's leadership: |
| 147 | --> '''Tucker''': Every day it's the same thing. Wake up, run drills, clean the base, [[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment run drills,]] maintain order, [[RuleofThree run drills.]] I have glamorous calves and a miserable fucking life! |
| 148 | |
| 149 | [[AC: Episode 9: A House Divided, Then Mutliplied]] |
| 150 | * Sarge's extended paranoid rant. This point takes the cake. |
| 151 | --> '''Sarge''': It's almost like all of this is [[LeaningOnTheFourthWall some sort of sick game!]]\ |
| 152 | ''({{Beat}})''\ |
| 153 | '''Grif''': This conversation is starting to get a [[MetaFiction little Meta]].\ |
| 154 | '''Sarge''': You're right... you think [[TheJuggernaut he]] [[ComicallyMissingThePoint was in on it too?]] |
| 155 | |
| 156 | [[AC: Episode 10: Long Live the King]] |
| 157 | * Some poorly chosen words in an argument between Wash and Tucker cause Freckles to declare ''Caboose'' the team captain. |
| 158 | --> '''Freckles''': In the unanimous decision by the Blue Team, Caboose has been promoted to Blue Leader. Captain Caboose is your commanding officer. Do not talk back to your commanding officer.\ |
| 159 | '''Grif''': [[ThisIsGonnaSuck Oh, fuck]]. |
| 160 | * Without a doubt, a bad decision on their part. |
| 161 | --> '''Freckles''': Do not talk back to your commanding officer.\ |
| 162 | '''Tucker''': Wash and I are having an argument. I will be talking back to him. That's how arguments work, you fucking toaster! |
| 163 | * Grif's attempts to distance himself from Sarge as he picks a fight with Freckles. |
| 164 | * This: |
| 165 | --> '''Wash''': Tucker, calm down.\ |
| 166 | '''Tucker''': Me?! These guys roll up in a fucking assault jeep and you choose to yell at me?\ |
| 167 | '''Wash''': Look, tensions are high--\ |
| 168 | '''Tucker''': No shit, Washington. I'm tired of you bossing us around.\ |
| 169 | '''Wash''': Now is not the time.\ |
| 170 | '''Tucker''': You know, I disagree. We were having a talk when Tweedledee and Tweedle-fucking-idiot decided to interrupt, so let's finish this.\ |
| 171 | '''Wash''': There is nothing to finish!\ |
| 172 | '''Grif''': [[DeadpanSnarker Are we intruding on some sort of lovers' quarrel right now?]] |
| 173 | * Then there is Freckles coldly warning Simmons, now that he accidentally joined the Blue Team, that deserting will mark him as punishable by death. |
| 174 | -->'''Simmons''': [[BigWhat WHAT!?!]]\ |
| 175 | '''Grif''': Uh, hey Sarge? [[{{Irony}} Now, the Blues have kidnapped Simmons]].\ |
| 176 | '''Sarge''': Then it's war! (Prepares to attack Freckles)\ |
| 177 | '''Wash''': [[OnlySaneMan Wait, stop!]]\ |
| 178 | '''Sarge''': [[BadassBoast Say hello to Robot Satan, you mechanical son of a]]- (Warthog gets blown up by Freckles) |
| 179 | * As the situation's about to deteriorate into a complete clusterfuck, a single gunshot is heard...everyone turns to see where it came from, and Tex's {{Leitmotif}} begins to play... [[TheDayTheMusicLied and it's DONUT.]] |
| 180 | -->"Man, you guys are ''really noisy!''" |
| 181 | * Donut's idea of ''helping?'' To bring Doc and Lopez version 1.0 along... and then tell the ship to leave, which means that everyone's ''still'' fucked. Thus is the conflict resolved... by [[ConflictKiller everyone's ire re-focusing on Donut]]. |
| 182 | --> '''Wash:''' [[LetMeGetThisStraight So you're telling me]]... that you heard our distress signal... grabbed Doc... ''hopped on a ship''... [[SuddenlyShouting AND THEN TOLD THE SHIP TO LEAVE?!]] '''AND THAT'S YOUR IDEA OF SENDING HELP?!'''\ |
| 183 | '''Donut:''' What? No! I brought Lopez, too.\ |
| 184 | ''(Cut to Lopez Dos.0 standing next to the original Lopez's head.)''\ |
| 185 | '''Lopez:''' Qué. Carajo. ([[FlatWhat What. The fuck.]])\ |
| 186 | ''({{Beat}})''\ |
| 187 | '''Sarge:''' KILL HIM! ''(Everyone rushes Donut at once.)'' |
| 188 | ** Should be noted that even ''[[NotSoAboveItAll Washington]]'' joins in on this. Yes, Donut is that annoying. |
| 189 | |
| 190 | [[AC: Episode 11: Worst Laid Plans]] |
| 191 | * Caboose's first team meeting as leader goes...awkwardly. With Caboose deciding that Tucker needs to fix the radio while Wash is made into a lookout, much to the other's confusion and irritation. |
| 192 | -->'''Caboose''': Yeah, I'm thinking that you know, uh, Washington is mean and scary. Yes, yes, he will be our lookout!\ |
| 193 | '''Tucker''': Lookout?\ |
| 194 | '''Caboose''': Yes. Washington, make sure you look out, for bad guys! And, anything, that looks scary.\ |
| 195 | '''Washington''': [[DeadpanSnarker There's a giant robot trying to kill me.]]\ |
| 196 | '''Tucker''': [[CaptainObvious Yeah, why can't ''Freckles'' be our lookout?]] [[AttackDrone Killing stuff is like, his entire reason for existing.]]\ |
| 197 | '''Caboose''': Well um, every great leader needs a great best friend, and Freckles, I think you could be that best friend.\ |
| 198 | '''Freckles''': '''''...Acknowledged.''''' |
| 199 | *** There is also the bonus of seeing Simmons absolutely miserable while being captured by the Blue Team due to Freckles. |
| 200 | --->'''Simmons''': I wanna go home... |
| 201 | * We start to get hints that the ship's crashing may not have been completely Tucker's fault... |
| 202 | --> ''(Flashback to the ship before it crashed)''\ |
| 203 | '''Crew Member:''' Oh my god! Who spilled soda all over my instruments?!\ |
| 204 | '''Grif:''' Oh my god! I spilled my soda?!\ |
| 205 | ''(Cue alarms going off)''\ |
| 206 | ''(Return to the present, focus on Grif)''\ |
| 207 | '''Grif:''' [[BlatantLies Somehow, the ship crashed, but, uh... no one seems to know why or how, or when...]]\ |
| 208 | '''Sarge:''' ''(Walks up)'' Men!\ |
| 209 | '''Grif:''' [[SuspiciouslySpecificDenial I didn't do it! You can't prove that I did!]] |
| 210 | * Sarge's BatDeduction popping up again, this time making being a pacifist into being blood-hungry. |
| 211 | --> '''Sarge:''' Yeah, but think about it! You can't spell pacifist without '''fist''', which you need to throw a punch. That always leads to fighting, the precursor to a full-out battle! Which is ultimately the first step on the inevitable road to war! Violence is unavoidable, Doc. [[InsaneTrollLogic Time to just admit that you've got a pacifist's natural-born lust for murder!]] |
| 212 | |
| 213 | [[AC: Episode 12: Finders Keepers]] |
| 214 | * Grif and Doc discover a stack of high-tech energy cubes. Grif's idea of a finding out what they do is to throw them at stuff and see what happens, ignoring Doc's pleas for caution. |
| 215 | --> '''Doc:''' What is ''wrong'' with you?! |
| 216 | * Before that, Grif finds a small pistol that shoots modules that stick harmlessly to whatever they hit. He tries one out on Doc. The next few minutes play out without anything happening, and Grif's about to convince Doc to grab one of those pistols and join in the fun. Then Sarge comes up and tells them to get back to work, and Doc pulls off the sticky-module and tosses it aside. As everyone walks away, none of them notice that the module ''explodes.'' |
| 217 | -->'''Sarge:''' ''(Off-screen)'' You better not be breaking things down there! |
| 218 | * Near the end, Sarge finds a heavily-armored mech in the ship. He likens it to seeing a pretty girl on the first day of school. It's actually pretty cute, until... |
| 219 | -->'''Sarge:''' Except imagine that pretty girl at school is armor-plated with a titanium poly-alloy and outfitted with fifty millimeter canons and ammo for ''days!''\ |
| 220 | '''Doc:''' She sounds pretty high-maintenance.\ |
| 221 | '''Grif:''' She sounds like I'd need a safe word to date her.\ |
| 222 | '''Sarge:''' Oh yeah! |
| 223 | * And then while they're trying to figure out how to ''move'' this giant mech, Sarge suggests taking it apart and moving it piece by piece, in carrying cases if need be...while ''[[CrossesTheLineTwice still using the "pretty girl" analogy!]]'' |
| 224 | -->'''Doc:''' Yeah... [[{{Metaphorgotten}} I think your dating metaphor took a turn into serial killer territory there, Sarge.]] |
| 225 | * And after they spot Wash sneaking around... |
| 226 | -->'''Sarge:''' Let's just dismember this beautiful lady and take back to our lair. I mean, base.\ |
| 227 | '''Grif:''' Could you please stop referring to the robot as a woman? It's really weird.\ |
| 228 | '''Sarge:''' Not as weird as the throbbin' erection she's givin' me.\ |
| 229 | '''Grif:''' [[TooMuchInformation Jesus Christ]]... |
| 230 | |
| 231 | [[AC: Episode 13: +1 Follower]] |
| 232 | * The [[WideEyedIdealist new Lopez]] interacting with [[DeadpanSnarker the old one]]. At the end of the episode, old Lopez takes it upon himself to tell his successor why the Reds are the worst. It involves some [[LeaningOnTheFourthWall amazing breaking down of the fourth wall]]. |
| 233 | --> '''Lopez:''' [SUSPIRO] Vas a querer sentarte para esta historia. Es alrededor de veinte horas y solo disfruto contarla en intervalos de cinco minutos. ([SIGH] You're going to want to sit down for this story. It's about 20 hours long and I only enjoy telling it in 5 minute intervals). |
| 234 | |
| 235 | [[AC: Episode 14: Reconcillation]] |
| 236 | * Grif shirking on cleaning the base in order to test the teleportation cubes. Out of frustration, Donut snags a cube, throws it onto Grif's stuff, and then throws it all the way across Exile... straight into Blue Base, right by [[NeatFreak Simmons]]. |
| 237 | --> '''Simmons:''' [[TemptingFate Things are starting to look up.]]\ |
| 238 | ''(the teleportation cube lands.)''\ |
| 239 | '''Simmons:''' '''''[[DistantReactionShot NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!]]''''' |
| 240 | ** Afterwards, Caboose's newest order is to clean up Blue base. His description of the new mess includes... |
| 241 | --->'''Caboose''' ...And Simmons [[TroubledFetalPosition won't stop rocking back and forth in the corner,]] and he's, uh... kinda freaking me out. |
| 242 | * Apparently, Tucker and Grif weren't the only ones who caused the ship to crash... Even ''[[NotSoAboveItAll Washington]]'' helped out a little bit. |
| 243 | -->'''Tucker:''' ''(After complaining about Wash's leadership style for a bit)'' But, I guess you weren't really our leader when the ship crashed, so you don't have to take the blame for that one. |
| 244 | -->''(Wash is silent. Flashback to the ship)'' |
| 245 | --> '''Wash:''' Whoops. Sorry, knocked the cable out of the wall. [[TemptingFate Hope that wasn't important.]]\ |
| 246 | ''(Alarms begin to blare)'' |
| 247 | * When making up with Tucker, Washington's speech includes this funny little tidbit halfway through: |
| 248 | -->'''Wash:''' [[OvershadowedByAwesome Did you know I was one of the worst Freelancers in my squad?]] There was Agent York, [[PlayfulHacker our security specialist]], Agent North, [[FriendlySniper the sharpshooter]], Carolina [[ActionGirl was an expert in martial arts]], and Tex was...[[TheAce well, you know Tex.]]\ |
| 249 | '''Tucker:''' [[DeadpanSnarker Cool story, bro.]]\ |
| 250 | '''Wash:''' [[ContinuityNod I was known for]] getting a grappling hook [[GroinAttack stuck to my balls.]]\ |
| 251 | '''Tucker:''' ...Okay, where are you going with this? |
| 252 | ** What's even funnier is that whether by accident or on purpose, it looks like Tucker's doing a double-take as he hears that last part! |
| 253 | * This little punctuation to Caboose's latest set of orders is both amusing and oddly adorable. |
| 254 | -->'''Caboose:''' Assistant Captain Best Friend Freckles, initiate piggyback sequence! ''(leaps onto Freckles' back who proceeds to take him back to base)'' |
| 255 | |
| 256 | [[AC: Episode 15: Neighborhood Watch]] |
| 257 | * Lopez 1.0 demonstrates to 2.0 the one reason he likes the Red Team: he can insult them all he likes in Spanish, and they won't even realize it! |
| 258 | * Following the heartwarming speech Washington gave to Caboose, Caboose tries on the new helmet Wash made for him. Tucker compliments Wash on his scheme, while Wash admits that he meant every word. [[MoodWhiplash And then...]] |
| 259 | -->'''Caboose:''' Uh oh. I-I can't see anything. Hello?\ |
| 260 | '''Tucker:''' I think you need to work on your craftsmanship.\ |
| 261 | '''Caboose:''' OH MY GOD! I'M BLIND!\ |
| 262 | '''Washington:''' One step at a time, Tucker. |
| 263 | * Red Team ''finally'' gets their robot, the Cyclops, built... and it turns out that Sarge's [[SamusIsAGirl comparison to a beautiful lady isn't that far off the mark!]] Only two problems. One, Grif's laziness resulted in several missing parts. Two, she considers ''everything'' to be a hostile...'' [[TurnedAgainstTheirMasters including Red Team.]]'' Oh, and three: she runs out of power because Sarge [[TimTaylorTechnology converted her to diesel instead of power cells]]. Afterwards, Sarge and Grif have this conversation on room for improvement: |
| 264 | -->'''Sarge:''' Looks like she needs a bigger fuel tank.\ |
| 265 | '''Grif:''' Fuck ''that!'' She needs to be thrown off a cliff!\ |
| 266 | '''Sarge:''' [[ComicallyMissingThePoint I don't see how that's gonna solve the fuel problem...]] |
| 267 | * When Locus' four-man assault squad attacks Blue Team, Tucker [[CrouchingMoronHiddenBadass retaliates and takes one of them out with a headshot.]] Washington tries to suggest negotiation by pointing out that [[PoorCommunicationKills they don't know who these soldiers are or why they're attacking...]] |
| 268 | -->'''Tucker:''' They're the guys who're gonna kill ''us'' if ''we'' don't kill them ''first''!\ |
| 269 | ''({{Beat}})''\ |
| 270 | '''Washington:''' [[PreAssKickingOneLiner Freckles! Take them out!]]\ |
| 271 | '''Freckles:''' [[MacrossMissileMassacre Eliminating targets.]] |
| 272 | |
| 273 | [[AC: Episode 16: FAQ]] |
| 274 | * Doc finishes patching up the leg wound of the mysterious orange-accented soldier (A.K.A. Felix), who points out that he still can't feel his toes. Donut cheerfully observes that this is apparently normal. |
| 275 | * When Felix claims that the Blood Gulch Crew has a reputation for being the galaxy's greatest warriors, the team's reaction is mixed: |
| 276 | -->'''Simmons:''' ''(Gives the rest of the group a dubious glance)'' Well... I can see how you might ''[[MistakenForBadass think]]'' that...\ |
| 277 | '''Sarge:''' [[IRejectYourReality Because it's absolutely true!]]\ |
| 278 | '''Doc:''' It's... ''[[CrouchingMoronHiddenBadass partially true.]]''\ |
| 279 | '''Grif:''' [[ArmedFarces But mostly false.]]\ |
| 280 | '''Wash:''' [[SurroundedByIdiots ...Stop giving him information.]] |
| 281 | * Caboose continues to have problems with his helmet's visibility system. |
| 282 | * We continue to learn that the crashing of the ship at the beginning of the season was the fault of more than one person when Simmons wonders how they ended up all the way across the galaxy. Cue a flashback from Sarge... |
| 283 | -->'''Crew Member:''' Sir, please! You can't be back here! These engines are ''delicate!''\ |
| 284 | '''Sarge:''' Can it, pointdexter! No wonder this flight's taking so long! Whoever heard of delicate engines? [[TimTaylorTechnology Engines are supposed to be big, loud, and terrible for the environment!]] Let's kick this baby into Slipspace!\ |
| 285 | '''Crew Member:''' Wait--!\ |
| 286 | ''(Sarge throws a switch, and alarms start blaring. Cut back to the present, focus on Sarge)''\ |
| 287 | '''Sarge:''' Er... one mystery at a time there, Simmons. |
| 288 | * Felix explains his job: |
| 289 | -->'''Felix''': I'm a freelancer.\ |
| 290 | ''(Everyone, including [[ActualPacifist Doc]], instantly points their NoisyGuns at him)''\ |
| 291 | '''Felix''': No, n-no, [[ThatCameOutWrong I mean I'm a mercenary! Y'know, a gun for hire?!]] |
| 292 | |
| 293 | |
| 294 | [[AC: Episode 17: Ready...Aim...]] |
| 295 | * Tucker manages to fix the visor of Caboose's new helmet... but somehow screws up its voice chip. |
| 296 | --> '''Tucker:''' How about now?\ |
| 297 | '''Caboose:''' Still can't see anything!\ |
| 298 | '''Tucker:''' ''(Dryly)'' Open your eyes.\ |
| 299 | '''Caboose:''' [[FourthWallObserver Oh, my God! The graphics are incredible!]] |
| 300 | * After the Reds and Blues finish outfitting the canyon for battle. |
| 301 | -->'''Donut:''' Well, it just goes to show that with time, effort, and a little bit of elbow grease, we really can achieve wonders! |
| 302 | -->'''Tucker:''' We spent hours turning this place into a war zone, and you made me hate it in one sentence. |
| 303 | -->'''Grif:''' It's what he does. |
| 304 | * Sarge talking to the Lopezes, of which it should be noted, Lopez is just a disembodied head while 2.0 is a full-body robot. |
| 305 | --> '''Sarge:''' And finally we have the Lopezes. [[EpicFail Stop standing next to each other! I can never tell you two apart!]] |
| 306 | --> '''Lopez 2.0:''' (looking down at Lopez's head and then back to Sarge) [[LampshadeHanging Are you fucking serious?]] |
| 307 | |
| 308 | [[AC: Episode 18: Fire]] |
| 309 | * As the fight unfolds, Lopez 2.0 inside C.C.'s frame is going on a rampage until Donut steps in. His revealing that he can speak Spanish (poorly) starts out funny, then quickly becomes awesome.... and becomes funny again when he calls Dos-Point-Oh a "teriyaki pencil circus." |
| 310 | * Freckles is low on juice, so Simmons hooks him up to the power supply. Only problem is, all of the power is being diverted to Red Base. [[BrickJoke For downloading a high definition picture of Freckles on Basebook.]] Wash sums up the stupidity of the situation perfectly. |
| 311 | -->'''Wash''': '''[[LetMeGetThisStraight DOWNLOADING A PICTURE ON BASEBOOK IS DRAINING OUR ENTIRE POWER SUPPLY?!?!]]'''\ |
| 312 | '''Donut:''' It is a '''very''' high-quality picture.\ |
| 313 | '''Wash''': '''[[LampShadeHanging HOW DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE?!]]''' |
| 314 | * When Locus gets more involved in the fight by shooting the Reds' tank with a sticky-explosive, Sarge and Simmons bail out just before the bomb goes off. Grif has this to say: |
| 315 | -->'''Grif:''' [[OhCrap Holy shit!]] Those things ''[[BrickJoke explode?!]]'' |
| 316 | |
| 317 | [[AC: Episode 19: Lost But Not Forgotten]] |
| 318 | * The only funny thing in this episode is the remaining Reds and Blues bickering outside the mess hall. It starts with Simmons bringing Tucker up to speed. |
| 319 | -->'''Simmons:''' After you were knocked out, we were taken to this huge cave somewhere beneath the jungle. \ |
| 320 | '''Tucker:''' These guys live in a cave?\ |
| 321 | '''Simmons:''' They're rebels! Of course they live in a cave! It's hidden.\ |
| 322 | '''Grif:''' Nah, I'm with Tucker. I was expecting some badass snow base or something.\ |
| 323 | '''Simmons:''' What? Why?\ |
| 324 | '''Grif:''' That's what they had in ''[[Film/StarWarsTheEmpireStrikesBack Star Wars!]]''\ |
| 325 | '''Simmons:''' How is that even relevant?\ |
| 326 | '''Grif:''' Tell me this is not just like Franchise/StarWars. Tell me.\ |
| 327 | '''Caboose:''' [[DumbassHasAPoint Tucker does have a glowing sword]]...\ |
| 328 | '''Grif:''' [[TheCuckoolanderWasRight Tucker has a glowing sword, Simmons]]! |
| 329 | |
| 330 | [[/folder]] |
| 331 | |
| 332 | [[folder:Season 12]] |
| 333 | [[quoteright:350:https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/but_why_snowman.png]] |
| 334 | [[caption-width-right:350:"But... why, snowman...?"]] |
| 335 | * According to the trailer, Grif trains his men by leading them on infiltration missions into the mess hall, Simmons has the most [[CannotTalkToWomen incompatible team for him]], and Caboose is not allowed to touch heavy weapons or machinery.... [[NoodleIncident Kimball won't go into details.]] |
| 336 | |
| 337 | [[AC: Episode 1: Oh Captains, My Captains]] |
| 338 | * Grif's armor color gag returns, but this time it is referenced with his squad's name "Gold Team", and him demanding it be renamed orange team. |
| 339 | --> '''Smith:''' ''(voice over)'' What difference does it make?!\ |
| 340 | ''(Cut to Grif on the radio)''\ |
| 341 | '''Grif:''' You tell them it makes a big difference, Bitters, [[InsistentTerminology because I am orange!]] I am not gold! I am not yellow! I am [[PrecisionFStrike fucking]] ''orange!'' |
| 342 | * Simmons having a bit of an anxiety attack: |
| 343 | -->'''Simmons:''' What would Sarge say at a time like this?\ |
| 344 | '''Grif:''' Shut it, Simmons!\ |
| 345 | '''Simmons:''' Probably, yeah. |
| 346 | * Simmons gets a door open, and Caboose charges in, guns blazing and yelling... [[YourPrincessIsInAnotherCastle only to find another door]]. |
| 347 | -->'''Caboose:''' ...Did we win?\ |
| 348 | '''Simmons:''' ''(sighs) '' No. Apparently we've unlocked one of several security doors.\ |
| 349 | '''Grif:''' [[LampshadeHanging Oh, so I talk on the radio and it's jeopardizing the mission, but that happens and everything's fine?]]\ |
| 350 | '''Caboose:''' ''(whispering)'' Shush, Grif. [[HypocriticalHumor They might hear you.]]\ |
| 351 | ''{{Beat}}''\ |
| 352 | '''Simmons:''' Door opening.\ |
| 353 | ''(Caboose once again charges, firing and yelling as Grif sighs)'' |
| 354 | * Grif and Simmons are moving down a hallway (complete with the camera following them), move past Caboose (who's standing completely still), continuing to move down the hallway...only for [[OffscreenTeleportation Caboose (who's still standing still) to suddenly appear out of nowhere a few seconds later]]. |
| 355 | * When Grif tells Simmons to man up about his [[CannotTalkToWomen women issue (since his entire squad is filled with women)]], this exchange occurs. |
| 356 | -->'''Simmons:''' Oh no, this is like junior high all over again...!\ |
| 357 | '''Grif:''' What?\ |
| 358 | '''Simmons:''' Why do I have to play in the women's league!? I wanna be a mathlete, Dad! A mathlete! |
| 359 | * When Kimball halts the exercise, Caboose keeps yelling and shooting for a moment. |
| 360 | -->'''Kimball:''' What. The Hell. Was that?!\ |
| 361 | '''Caboose:''' ''[still yelling, then halts]'' Oh, we stopped. |
| 362 | * "On a scale of one to ten, I'd say we're pretty fucked." |
| 363 | |
| 364 | [[AC: Episode 2: Hit and Run]] |
| 365 | * Two Federal Army soldiers talk about a cut power cable. |
| 366 | -->'''Guard 1:''' The rats must have chewed through the wire.\ |
| 367 | '''Guard 2:''' [[LetMeGetThisStraight That is a military-grade, reinforced power cable.]] What kind of rats are you ''talking'' about?\ |
| 368 | '''Guard 1:''' ... [[SpaceX Space rats?]]\ |
| 369 | '''Guard 2:''' ... [[TheGuardsMustBeCrazy Yeah, I can see that.]] |
| 370 | * Felix gets ambushed by a Fed, and immediately turns and throws a combat knife at the guy, killing him. He then takes a Tiger Woods pose. |
| 371 | -->'''Felix:''' I am ''fucking awesome''. |
| 372 | ** Also, before the above line, the [[FunWithSubtitles subtitles read]]: [[MundaneMadeAwesome Epic knife throw.]] |
| 373 | |
| 374 | [[AC: Episode 3: Something Else Entirely]] |
| 375 | * When Grif is telling the troops the story of the final fight with The Meta (a story that isn't really even exaggerated), he has the troops in utter awe. |
| 376 | --> '''Republic Soldier 1:''' What did you do?\ |
| 377 | '''Grif:''' Huh? Oh, uhh, we tied a car to him and threw it off a cliff.\ |
| 378 | '''Republic Soldier 2:''' ...That is the most metal thing I've ever heard. |
| 379 | * When Simmons shows up, Jensen asks him if The Meta really had the strength of 10 bears. Simmons hesitates for a few seconds before bumping it up to 20. Jensen is in awe and another female soldier whispers a flirty "So hot!" about Simmons. |
| 380 | |
| 381 | [[AC: Episode 4: Teaming With Problems]] |
| 382 | * Smith, Caboose's lieutenant, translating Caboose's rambling into something inspiring... And loving the idea of Kool-Aid on tap. |
| 383 | * Simmons' campaign speech. |
| 384 | -->'''Simmons''': My fellow soldiers. If you elect me as your leader, you're not just voting for a kind, well-mannered leader, you're voting for victory. I've overseen countless skirmishes and calculated my opponent's every move. And although some people may not count ''Dungeons and Dragons'' as an acceptable example of military expertise, I beg to differ. A vote for Dick Simmons is a vote for America!\ |
| 385 | '''Palomo''': ...But we're not in America.\ |
| 386 | '''Simmons''': ...Fuck! |
| 387 | * Grif's campaign pitch is basically him calling dibs. |
| 388 | * Jensen getting so nervous that she "chokes on her own spit" and collapses momentarily. |
| 389 | -->'''Tucker''': Simmons, what the fuck is this?!\ |
| 390 | '''Simmons''': It was either her or the really hot one who plays volleyball!\ |
| 391 | '''Tucker''': ''Then what the fuck is this?!'' |
| 392 | |
| 393 | [[AC: Episode 5: Training Daze]] |
| 394 | * Felix's NotSoAboveItAll moment when he sticks his tongue out at Tucker and only realizes it isn't effective with a helmet in the way when Tucker asks why he's still just standing there. |
| 395 | * The rescue squad decides to test their skill by trying to take out Felix. Cue a montage of failure after failure. It's so hilarious in-universe it attracts a crowd with Felix commenting he's never heard them laughing so much. |
| 396 | ** [[invoked]] The guys who edited the footage together are voiced by [[Creator/AchievementHunter Achievement Hunters]] Michael Jones and [[TheAce Ray Narvaez Jr]]. [[ActorAllusion This cannot possibly be unintentional.]] |
| 397 | ** Felix can be heard expressing his concerns to the female medical officer that he may be too good-looking. He then stops Tucker's attempt to charge at him with an OffhandBackhand shield to the face. |
| 398 | ** In a ShoutOut to Creator/AchievementHunter, while Felix is strolling along a cliff edge, Tucker attempts to ambush him by jumping out at him, but overshoots and falls off the cliff. A splash is heard as he falls into the lake below, then Felix just continues on his way. |
| 399 | ---> '''Tucker:''' ''[jumps out at Felix]'' Surprise, motherfucker! ''[[[EpicFail misses and falls off the cliff]]]'' AAH-HAAUGHH! ''[distant splash]'' |
| 400 | ** At another point, Tucker throws a grenade at Felix yelling "Catch!" Felix proceeds to do so, counts a couple of 'Mississippis', then throws it back at the now fleeing Tucker, and fist pumps when it works. |
| 401 | ** Simmons' overly complicated hand gestures to Grif during another ambush attempt, including snapping in Z formation, and Grif's reaction to them. Bonus for Felix walking up and realizing what they're doing, and simply punching Grif (seen via helmet cam). |
| 402 | ---> '''Grif:''' At what point did you think I knew what that meant? |
| 403 | ** Palomo getting caught on video [[DistractedByTheSexy looking at Jensen's butt]]. |
| 404 | ** The exercise routines. In the running, Caboose is winning, and Grif collapses. With the push-ups, Caboose is simply counting "thirty-three" over and over as he does push-ups, while Grif and Bitters are lying on their sides tapping their fingers. |
| 405 | ** The fact that every time it cuts to the people watching the failure montage, the crowd has increased in size until it's about 10 nameless grunts alongside the team. All of them are in hysterics. |
| 406 | ** Smith gave his grenades to Caboose. |
| 407 | --->'''Caboose:''' ''([[CallBack tosses a grenade directly at the wall a few inches in front of him]])'' Fire in the hole. |
| 408 | |
| 409 | [[AC: Episode 6: Reflections]] |
| 410 | * Tucker finally tries to hit on Kimball. It goes very badly. |
| 411 | * Kimball sheepishly admitting that the pond beside her "nice thinking place" is full of radioactive algae. |
| 412 | * Grif is becoming Sarge due to the stress of leadership. [[WhatHaveIBecome He's horrified by this.]] |
| 413 | -->'''Grif:''' Simmons, what is happening to me!?\ |
| 414 | '''Simmons:''' I think you're having a mental breakdown.\ |
| 415 | '''Caboose:''' Yeah, those are my favorite kind.\ |
| 416 | '''Simmons:''' Being thrust into a position of power must be putting too much stress on your brain. Now it's defaulting into what you subconsciously perceive to be the symbol of leadership -- Sarge!\ |
| 417 | '''Grif:''' [[Film/TheEmpireStrikesBack That's not true! That's impossible!]] '''[[BigNo Nooooohohooo!]]'''\ |
| 418 | '''Palomo:''' You guys have ''any'' idea what's going on here?\ |
| 419 | '''Jensen:''' Not in the slightest. |
| 420 | * There is also Caboose completely missing the point of the conversation, believing they are discussing how he killed Church in Blood Gulch to which he implies that Church caused this event himself which is actually true. |
| 421 | -->'''Caboose''': And even though we all blame the tank, kind of sure Church had a little something to do with it too. |
| 422 | * Bitters stealing and eating a snack cake that Grif has been saving since ''basic training''. It doesn't go too well for him. |
| 423 | -->'''Bitters:''' ''[weakly]'' Don't... let me drown... in my helmet. ''(gags)'' |
| 424 | * Caboose's impression of Sarge after Grif explains his predicament to Tucker. |
| 425 | -->'''Grif:''' I don't ''want'' a southern accent! |
| 426 | -->'''Caboose:''' Yarrr! Drop and give me booty! |
| 427 | |
| 428 | [[AC: Episode 7: Self Assessment]] |
| 429 | * Discussing plans for leaving: |
| 430 | -->'''Grif''': Vehicle bay's got plenty of Warthogs, I guess...\ |
| 431 | '''Caboose''': [[ContinuityNod And I can drive a tank!]]\ |
| 432 | '''Everyone''': '''''No!'''''\ |
| 433 | '''Caboose''': Ah, you guys are just jealous. |
| 434 | * The guys at their 'truck stop', with Caboose wanting a lottery ticket, Grif wanting to loot the place and take the Slushee machine, and Tucker wanting magazines with 'pictures'. |
| 435 | ** Caboose's lottery numbers are 5, 7... and nothing else. |
| 436 | * Grif and Simmons talking about [[BlessedWithSuck the worst super powers.]] |
| 437 | |
| 438 | [[AC: Episode 8: Thin Ice]] |
| 439 | * When the guys are trying to figure out how to melt the base: |
| 440 | --> '''Tucker''': How about friction? All the ladies say I light a fire between their legs.\ |
| 441 | '''Grif''': That's chlamydia. |
| 442 | * The guys break into the Fed base, and when they're about to get caught, disguise themselves as snowmen. Made even better by Grif saying he used to do it in Blood Gulch, which didn't work for obvious reasons. |
| 443 | --> '''Fed Soldier''': What the-? Huh. Well, would you look at that. Just a couple of harmless snowmen! You guys wouldn't happen to be the ones making all that racket now, would you? ''(Beat)'' Welp, time for some target practice! ''(Tucker's sword pops out and stabs the soldier)'' ''[[ItMakesSenseInContext But... why, snowman...?]]'' |
| 444 | * Noticing that there aren't any guards around: |
| 445 | -->'''Tucker:''' I don't know, [[TemptingFate doesn't look like there's anyone around to me.]]\ |
| 446 | ''(A siren blares off from the speakers around the outpost.)''\ |
| 447 | '''Soldier on PA:''' Alright, lunch break's over. Back to your stations, people.\ |
| 448 | ''(Feds start piling out of the base and moving to their posts.)''\ |
| 449 | '''Soldier on a warthog:''' Come on, maggots, get the lead out! Move! Move! Move!\ |
| 450 | ''(Soldiers continue to move out of the outpost and set up stations around the base.)''\ |
| 451 | '''Soldier in a tank:''' Woo! Brand new tank, coming in! This will kill any intruders, for sure!\ |
| 452 | '''Tucker:''' I hate my stupid mouth.\ |
| 453 | '''Grif:''' I hate it more. |
| 454 | * The fed soldiers hearing about a breach in sewage pipe #3? "Sucks to be maintenance". Hearing that said pipe runs through the barracks? |
| 455 | -->'''Fed soldiers:''' [[OhCrap Shit!]] We have to save our shit!... [[LiteralMetaphor From the Shit!]]\ |
| 456 | |
| 457 | [[AC: Episode 9: The Federal Army of Chorus]] |
| 458 | * Washington trying to stay composed while Sarge rants and raves while they are all still "captives": |
| 459 | -->'''Washington:''' I have an idea. Let's play "The Quiet Game."\ |
| 460 | '''Donut:''' Ohohoho. It. Is. On!\ |
| 461 | '''Sarge:''' Great Monopoly's top hat, Wash! Now is not the time for games! Now is the time for action! Come on, help me get out of these cuffs. There's a certain someone in this room that I feel like bludgeoning to death!\ |
| 462 | '''Donut:''' Just use your feet, Sarge. If he fights back, [[AccidentalInnuendo I'll beat him off]] ya!\ |
| 463 | '''Sarge:''' You're not thinking, Donut! That'll just alert more guards!\ |
| 464 | '''Donut:''' Well, if I can't [[AmbiguouslyGay beat off a room full of dudes]], then what have I been training for this whole time?!\ |
| 465 | '''Washington:''' [[SurroundedByIdiots I would really like to play the quiet game, please.]] |
| 466 | * Donut's safe word is "[[MythologyGag Chrysanthemum]]". |
| 467 | * General Donald Doyle meets the captive Red and Blues. Followed shortly after by him fainting in front of the captive Red and Blues in his own base, surrounded by several of his men. |
| 468 | -->'''[[TheCutie Donut:]]''' ...What a ''weenie.'' |
| 469 | * [[EstablishingCharacterMoment Our introduction to Doctor Grey]]. While she's happy that Doyle wasn't seriously hurt, she ''did'' [[NightmareFetishist entertain the idea of experimenting on her commanding officer's fresh corpse]]. Then she's off to amputate some limbs with all the creepy gusto afforded to her. |
| 470 | * Washington, Sarge, and Donut confronting General Doyle: |
| 471 | -->'''Washington:''' So you sent your men to kill us?!\ |
| 472 | '''Doyle:''' Absolutely not!\ |
| 473 | '''Sarge:''' I've got a few cracked ribs that beg to differ! And a headbone that strongly disagrees. |
| 474 | * Doyle revealing how low he was in the command hierarchy before enough of his predecessors either ran away or died. |
| 475 | -->'''General Doyle:''' [[{{Understatement}} As I'm]] ''[[{{Understatement}} sure]]'' [[{{Understatement}} you've already observed]], I'm not a battle-worn soldier ripe with military expertise. [[YouAreInCommandNow On the contrary, I was simply next in line to run the army should something happen to its leader.]]\ |
| 476 | '''Agent Washington:''' [[TemptingFate Wh-what do you mean? Lieutenant General? Major General?]]\ |
| 477 | '''General Doyle:''' ''(embarrassed)'' Uh, personal secretary to the brigadier!\ |
| 478 | '''Agent Washington:''' ''[[BigWhat WHAT?!]]'' |
| 479 | * Lopez's grand return: |
| 480 | -->'''Sarge''': Bienvenidos, Robo-buddy! You're back in the world of the living! Viva... [[GratuitousSpanish la Viva.]]\ |
| 481 | '''Lopez''': Yo no estaba muerto. Mis miembros simplemente dejaron de funcionar y ellos me tiraron en la basura. Fue la experiencia más agradable que he tenido en años. Después aparecieron ustedes. (I wasn't dead. My limbs just stopped working and they put me in the trash can. It was the most enjoyable experience I have had in years. Then you showed up.)\ |
| 482 | '''Sarge''': No need to thank us! |
| 483 | ** There's also Lopez remarking to Donut that he [[CallBack "made friends with a space rat."]] |
| 484 | * When Lopez is turned back on, [[FreezeFrameBonus his system display says]]: |
| 485 | -->English.exe failed to initiate\ |
| 486 | Sarcasm module 100%\ |
| 487 | Life forms detected:\ |
| 488 | 1 - Idiot\ |
| 489 | 2 - Loud Idiot\ |
| 490 | 3 - Agent Washington |
| 491 | ** Really, the fact that Lopez gives more respect to the guy ''who once shot and nearly killed him'' than both his long-time teammates and his creator is pretty funny in and of itself. |
| 492 | *** But before his screen display was shown off as read above, it turns out that Lopez has [[FreezeFrameBonus his own version of the infamous "Blue Screen of Death".]] |
| 493 | --->If this is the first time you've seen this stop error screen, restart your LOPEZ. If this screen appears again, follow these steps:\ |
| 494 | Quit being an idiot\ |
| 495 | Stop damaging hardware\ |
| 496 | Perform proper repair |
| 497 | * Lopez's snarkiness hasn't gone down the slightest. |
| 498 | --> '''Donut:''' We have got a lot of catching up to do!\ |
| 499 | '''Lopez:''' Cuéntame más tarde. Seguro que es estúpido y confuso. (Fill me in later. I'm sure it's stupid and confusing.) |
| 500 | * [[BilingualBackfire Lopez realizes that Locus can actually understand him,]] and so naturally panics. |
| 501 | -->'''Donut:''' ''(quietly to Lopez about Locus)'' This guy doesn't make any sense!\ |
| 502 | '''Lopez:''' Se debe a que está loco. (That's because he's insane.)\ |
| 503 | '''Locus:''' ''(menacingly)'' I am ''not''.\ |
| 504 | '''Lopez:''' ALARM! MIERDA! EL ES BILINGÜE! POR FAVOR NO ME MATES! ([[OhCrap HOLY SHIT! HE'S BILINGUAL! PLEASE DON'T KILL ME!]]) |
| 505 | * Dr. Grey happily explaining that due to how bad the Civil War has gotten, there are virtually no civilians left... and that anyone ''not'' in PowerArmor was killed long ago. |
| 506 | |
| 507 | [[AC: Episode 10: Cloak and Dagger]] |
| 508 | * Donut's idea of setting up a perimeter. |
| 509 | -->'''Donut:''' ''(yelling)'' Hey! Just so you guys know, you better not come over here!\ |
| 510 | '''Lopez:''' Usted se avergüenza a si mismo. (You embarrass yourself.) |
| 511 | * The awkward and somewhat stunned reaction of the Reds and Blues seeing a Fed soldier disintegrate in front of them. |
| 512 | * Tucker's reaction to seeing Epsilon-Church. |
| 513 | -->'''Church:''' Miss me, assholes?!\ |
| 514 | '''Tucker:''' You fuck! ''(Jumps at him, passing right through the hologram and falling on his face)''\ |
| 515 | '''Church:''' Huh... Wasn't expecting that. |
| 516 | |
| 517 | [[AC: Episode 11: Long Time No See]] |
| 518 | * Church's snarkiness has not gone down in the slightest. |
| 519 | -->'''Carolina:''' How long until transfer?\ |
| 520 | '''Church:''' About forty-five seconds.\ |
| 521 | '''Carolina:''' And you can't make that go quicker?\ |
| 522 | '''Church''': That should give you enough time to deal with the three security personel who are about to come through the door.\ |
| 523 | '''Carolina''': What? Which door?!\ |
| 524 | '''Church''': ''(exasperated)'' There's ''only one door!'' They just set a breaching charge, by the way.\ |
| 525 | '''Carolina''': What?!\ |
| 526 | '''Church''': Detonates in ''three''...\ |
| 527 | '''Carolina''': Why didn't you tell me?!\ |
| 528 | '''Church:''' ''Two'' -- I just did!\ |
| 529 | '''Carolina''': Epsilon!\ |
| 530 | '''Church''': ''One'' -- Oh, you'll be fine! |
| 531 | * While Church is working on a game plan for Carolina's fight, he's having a conversation with all the other [=A.I.=] fragments. Which includes Delta sarcastically suggesting he get a dog to combat loneliness, and Theta getting all excited about the idea. |
| 532 | |
| 533 | [[AC: Episode 12: The Reunion]] |
| 534 | * Grey cheerfully getting to know the teams. |
| 535 | -->'''Dr. Grey:''' [[DysfunctionJunction Psychoanalyzes for everyone!]] |
| 536 | ** Particular mention goes to when Church first appears in front of her. She takes it strangely in stride. |
| 537 | ---> '''Dr. Grey:''' ''Sooooooo...'' there's a tiny ghost man here. Anyone care to introduce me?! |
| 538 | * [[invoked]] Bordering a bit on TearJerker, Caboose insisting that [[BlatantLies he didn't miss Church.]] |
| 539 | * The Reds comparing the Blues' bickering to daytime soap operas. |
| 540 | -->'''Sarge:''' Heh, this is better than any daytime television drama! And that's some quality programming!\ |
| 541 | '''Donut:''' Maybe Church will turn out to be someone's long-lost brother!\ |
| 542 | '''Grif:''' I think we've had ''enough'' plot twists for one lifetime.\ |
| 543 | '''Donut:''' And his real name is ''Horatio!''\ |
| 544 | '''Sarge:''' [[StrangeMindsThinkAlike I'd watch it!]] |
| 545 | * When Carolina says that she thinks their ship was crashed on Chorus by a third party: |
| 546 | -->'''Simmons:''' ...Sooooo, what you're ''saying'' is, there's no way any of ''us'' could be responsible for the crash?\ |
| 547 | '''Carolina:''' ''([[LockedOutOfTheLoop confused]])'' I... well... yes. Why do you ask?\ |
| 548 | ''(Flashback to the ship.)''\ |
| 549 | '''Spaceship Operator:''' Sir, this area is reserved for authorized personnel only. What were you doing in there?\ |
| 550 | '''Simmons:''' Oh! Sorry, I just noticed you guys were using a really outdated web browser. I went ahead and updated it for you. Now it's the one NASA uses! Heh, no need to thank me.\ |
| 551 | '''Spaceship Operator:''' Those are the ship's navigation systems! You can't just update that stuff!\ |
| 552 | '''Simmons:''' Tell me about it! Once I started with the browser, I couldn't stop myself from changing the graphics card too!\ |
| 553 | '''Spaceship Operator:''' You WHAT?!\ |
| 554 | '''Simmons:''' And the motherboard. And the fan. And- oh hey, by the way! Uh, I'm glad you're here. How do you feel about acrylic window panels?\ |
| 555 | '''Spaceship Operator:''' I...\ |
| 556 | '''Simmons:''' The answer is, you love 'em.\ |
| 557 | ''(The ship's alarm goes off. Cut back to the forest base.)''\ |
| 558 | '''Everyone Else:''' [[SuspiciouslySpecificDenial ...No reason!]] |
| 559 | ** Not to mention that the only member of the team ''not'' explicitly involved in all of these hijinks (not counting Carolina and Church) [[{{Irony}} turns out to be...]][[NotMeThisTime wait a minute]]...''[[TeamKiller Caboose?!]]'' |
| 560 | |
| 561 | |
| 562 | [[AC: Episode 13: Catch Up, No Mustard]] |
| 563 | * Grif refusing to part with his new laser weapon has a few highlights: |
| 564 | ** Donut cheerfully accounting how Grif [[InelegantBlubbering broke down]] after the UNSC confiscated the "Grif-Shot" (Meta's old grenade rifle). |
| 565 | ** Grif and Sarge butt heads over handing the weapon over: |
| 566 | --->'''Sarge:''' Damn it, Grif! Hand over that laser this instant!\ |
| 567 | '''Grif:''' You can't tell me what to do! I out-rank you! ''[[CallBack Again!]]''\ |
| 568 | '''Sarge:''' I, bu-, what the--?! ''([[{{Angrish}} angrily mutters]], followed by hefting his shotgun)'' Well, let's see you out-rank the end of my shotgun!\ |
| 569 | '''Grif:''' (hoists his laser weapon) Uh, ''done.'' Fucking space-laser, bitch! |
| 570 | ** Church ends up ghosting into Grif to make him hand over the weapon... which is covered in grease, much to Carolina's disgust. And apparently, Grif ''himself'' is pretty greasy, much to ''Church's'' disgust. |
| 571 | * Caboose's little talk with Wash about the fate of Freckles. |
| 572 | -->'''Washington:''' ...Caboose. I'm not really sure how to tell you this without both confusing you... and breaking your disturbingly fragile heart.\ |
| 573 | '''Caboose:''' [[{{Manchild}} I am an emotional time bomb!]]\ |
| 574 | '''Washington:''' ''(under his breath)'' [[ThisIsGonnaSuck Jesus Christ...]] |
| 575 | * Caboose treating the flashdrive Freckles like a real dog. |
| 576 | * Afterwards, Wash is privately reflecting on how it's nice to have everyone back together. Cue the MomentKiller: |
| 577 | -->'''Grif:''' ''(off-screen, shouting)'' Back off, lady, or I will ''put you in the ground!''\ |
| 578 | '''Washington:''' ''(annoyed)'' ...Aaand the moment's passed. |
| 579 | * Grif then accidentally fires his Suppressor (the Forerunner weapon he got from the Space Pirates) at Carolina. |
| 580 | * Grif's teleporter cubes make a return appearance... along with [[CallBack a reminder]] that they were inadvertently used to [[PutOnABus teleport Doc to God-knows-where.]] |
| 581 | -->'''Lopez:''' Y Doc. Usted accidentalmente teletransportó a Doc. (And Doc. You accidentally teleported Doc.)\ |
| 582 | '''Donut:''' Oh my God, that's right! [[ComicallyMissingThePoint We DID use them to defeat Dos Point Oh!]]\ |
| 583 | '''Lopez:''' Oh, por el amor de Dios... (Oh, for fuck's sake...) |
| 584 | * Sarge admits that they found said cubes while trying to find a way to defeat the Blues-- [[VerbalBackspace er, their giant robot, Freckles. May he rest in peace.]] |
| 585 | |
| 586 | [[AC: Episode 14: Crash Site Crashers]] |
| 587 | * Grey promises to make food out of fungi and algae when the group returns. Wash kindly asks her not to. |
| 588 | * [[invoked]] Grif and Simmons bantering is called [[HoYay "pillow talk."]] By ''everyone.'' |
| 589 | * After Tucker forced the team to leave a few seconds before the upload was finished, he defends himself to a pissed-off Church by saying Church couldn't have known how much longer it would really take. |
| 590 | -->'''Church:''' Newsflash! I was ''there'', and ''by the way'', I'm made out of ''numbers!'' |
| 591 | * Caboose's excitement after nearly getting killed by the Space Pirate who teleported back with them. |
| 592 | -->'''Caboose:''' MY LIFE JUST FLASHED BEFORE MY EYES, IT WAS AWSOME. AAAAH LET'S DO THAT AGAIN!'' |
| 593 | |
| 594 | [[AC: Episode 15: Accentuate the Interrogative]] |
| 595 | * Wash talking to Tucker at the beginning after watching Grey chew out Carolina about using her speed enhancement with a bad leg. |
| 596 | -->'''Agent Washington:''' You know, I don't think I've ever seen a civilian lecture a Freelancer like that before. It was... pretty entertaining, actually. |
| 597 | * After Washington gives Tucker his best attempt at a pep talk, Simmons walks up to ask the ex-Freelancer to help with Carolina's interrogation of their new prisoner. More specifically, Simmons is hoping that Wash can calm Carolina down: |
| 598 | --> '''Carolina:''' ''(shouting off-screen after hitting something)'' ''WHY WON'T HE '''TALK?!'''''\ |
| 599 | '''Simmons:''' She's a ''[[{{Understatement}} little]]'' frustrated... |
| 600 | * And when they get there, Carolina has resorted to throwing things. Church (who just had a metal crate thrown through his holographic form) dryly remarks that she [[CallBack takes after her mother.]] |
| 601 | -->'''Sarge:''' Was her mother some sort of silverback gorilla on steroids?\ |
| 602 | '''Church:''' Yeah, you'd better be happy her mother's not around to hear you say that. |
| 603 | * When Dr. Grey joins the conversation, asking if the prisoner's awake, Grif points out that he's betting that he won't stay that way long--specifically, he thinks Carolina will ''rip his spine out'' within the hour. [[StrangeMindsThinkAlike Simmons takes him up on those odds.]] |
| 604 | * Then Dr. Grey decides to take over the interrogation, [[DissonantSerenity cheerfully remarking]] that all of her friends back at her old base are dead thanks to the space pirates. Ergo, she thinks the one they captured [[TortureTechnician is due for a checkup.]] Sarge and [[BrokenAce Carolina]] give each other a concerned glance. [[ToThePain Cut to her describing]] the facility's surgical equipment and incinerator to their defiant prisoner, and her experience with it. [[GoryDiscretionShot And then...]] |
| 605 | --> ''(Outside, the assembled team is listening to the prisoner's [[ScreamsLikeALittleGirl shrieks]] of frightened pain, and Dr. Grey's [[WickedCultured renditions]] of operatic arias.)''\ |
| 606 | '''Simmons:''' ''(nervously)'' Sarge? I'm ''scared.''\ |
| 607 | '''Sarge:''' Simmons, we're ''all'' scared. ''({{Beat}})'' [[BlatantLies I mean, except for me.]]\ |
| 608 | ''(Dr. Grey walks out and joins them.)''\ |
| 609 | '''Dr. Grey:''' (cheerfully) His name's Zachary Miller, he's ex-military, and he was polite enough to hand over the coordinates to a nearby radio jamming tower!\ |
| 610 | '''Carolina:''' [[YouHaveGotToBeKiddingMe ...You're kidding...]]\ |
| 611 | '''Dr. Grey:''' No, silly, I'm Dr. Grey! [[DontExplainTheJoke Ha! Dad joke!]]\ |
| 612 | '''Carolina:''' (exchanges a look with Washington) ...All right. Think he's...in a position to answer a few more questions?\ |
| 613 | '''Dr. Grey:''' Oh, absolutely! ''[[TooMuchInformation Just let me go put him back together.]]''\ |
| 614 | ''(Dr. Grey walks off, and Tucker looks at Caboose.)''\ |
| 615 | '''Tucker:''' ''(terrified)'' Caboose?\ |
| 616 | '''Caboose:''' Yes?\ |
| 617 | '''Tucker:''' Don't ''ever'' stick your dick in crazy.\ |
| 618 | '''Caboose:''' ''(confused)'' ...I have ''no'' idea what that means.\ |
| 619 | '''Tucker:''' ''(sadly)'' I know. |
| 620 | * Before leaving Wash and Carolina to get more information out of Zachary, Dr. Gray says one more thing to the Space Pirate, prompting this understandable response from him. |
| 621 | -->'''Dr. Grey:''' You'll find his belongings on the crate over there, and that his tone is ''much'' more positive.\ |
| 622 | ''(Dr. Grey walks up to Zachary.)''\ |
| 623 | '''Dr. Gray:''' Isn't that right Zachary?\ |
| 624 | '''Zachary Miller:''' FOR THE LOVE OF GOD GET THIS PSYCHOPATH AWAY FROM ME! |
| 625 | * [[invoked]] It crosses over with a SugarWiki/MomentOfAwesome, but the Space Pirate reveals that it was their tractor beam that caused the ''Hand of Merope'' to crash, and not the Reds and Blues' antics. Those antics ''[[EpicFail ripped the ship in half]]'' instead. |
| 626 | -->'''Zachary Miller:''' It was like the ship tried to jump to slipspace, change course and power down, all at the same time. It didn't make any sense! Instead of pulling you down, the ship got...ripped apart.\ |
| 627 | '''Washington:''' ...I'm... gonna go ahead and claim partial responsibility for that. |
| 628 | * As the mercenaries catch up to them, Church calls out positions while Carolina and Wash get ready to hold them off in the medical lab. Then the rest of the Blood Gulch Crew retreats into the room, their voices overlapping into a panicked babble that reinforces the fact that they [[ArmedFarces aren't exactly a team of badass commandoes.]] Most of the time, anyway. |
| 629 | * A deleted scene has the Red Team try interrogating Zachary before Grey, with Simmons telling his life story of being bullied, Donut singing a song from one of his 12 musicals he wrote while in the Red Army, Lopez doing "celebrity impersonations," mainly famous annoying telephone answering tones, and Grif, being too lazy, bringing in Caboose instead, who insists that Zachary "tell him all his secrets" and then repeats "Do it" repeatedly, shortening the intervals until he is repeatedly chanting it, at which point Zachary starts screaming. |
| 630 | |
| 631 | [[AC: Episode 16: Out of the Frying Pan]] |
| 632 | * Freckles is debugged. Now he just needs to get "fixed". |
| 633 | * This moment between Bitters and Smith after a RousingSpeech from Kimball. |
| 634 | -->'''Bitters:''' Yeah, [[ThisIsGonnaSuck we're totally dead.]]\ |
| 635 | ''(Smith punches Bitters)''\ |
| 636 | '''Bitters:''' OW!\ |
| 637 | '''Smith:''' [[MomentKiller Not! The time.]] |
| 638 | * Carolina's exasperation at Church and Tucker's joking and half-assed apologies to each other. |
| 639 | |
| 640 | [[AC: Episode 17: Multiple Choice]] |
| 641 | * [[invoked]] Palomo tries to think of the "Super Elite Team" as ComicBook/TheAvengers, citing that Smith is Captain America, Jensen is Black Widow, and he's Tony Stark. Bitters disagrees and claims that if anything, Palomo is Hawkeye... [[MemeticLoser movie Hawkeye]], [[TakeThat which prompts a violent response from him.]] |
| 642 | ** There's also Bitters [[BlackComedy openly hoping that Palomo dies before him.]] |
| 643 | * Epsilon classifying the various options left to the Blood Gulch Crew on a sliding scale of [[ThisIsGonnaSuck "Fucking Terrible"]] to "Goddamn Nightmare." |
| 644 | |
| 645 | [[AC: Episode 18: Fed vs New]] |
| 646 | * The mere fact that Dr. Grey and Epsilon managed to put Freckles in Caboose's gun. |
| 647 | * Simmons taunting a (black-armored) Space Pirate. |
| 648 | -->'''Simmons:''' ''(pops out of cover)'' [[ContinuityNod Hey, suck it, Black!]] ''[hides again]''\ |
| 649 | '''Space Pirate:''' ''(turning to look)'' What?!\ |
| 650 | '''Simmons:''' ''(popping out again)'' [[MistakenForRacist Just to clarify, that wasn't a race thing!]] |
| 651 | * Dr. Grey trying to help the Reds when they gang-tackle the Space Pirate. |
| 652 | -->'''Grey:''' Aim for the jugular!\ |
| 653 | '''Grif:''' ''[offscreen fighting]'' Ow!\ |
| 654 | '''Grey:''' The '''jugular!'''\ |
| 655 | '''Grif:''' OW!\ |
| 656 | '''Grey:''' (angrily stamps her foot) '''[[SophisticatedAsHell PUNCH HIM IN THE GODDAMN THROAT!]]'''\ |
| 657 | '''Grif:''' Well why didn't you just say so?!\ |
| 658 | '''Sarge:''' (laughs) |
| 659 | * Even in an episode of him being awesome, Washington still can't get a break in some areas. |
| 660 | -->'''Wash:''' ''(exasperated)'' [[CallBack If it's not a car, it's a cliff.]] |
| 661 | * After easily sidestepping Tucker's first sword swing, Felix has this to say. |
| 662 | -->'''Felix:''' Round one, Felix. ''(bows with a mockingly wise voice and his hand holding the knife in his other hand.)''\ |
| 663 | '''Tucker:''' God, you're a fucking tool. |
| 664 | * Lopez is reduced to just a head, [[RunningGag again]]. Then he finds out that he can control ''this'' body remotely. |
| 665 | -->'''Lopez:''' ¡Tienes que estar bromeando! ([[LampshadeHanging You've got to be fucking kidding me!]])\ |
| 666 | ''(Lopez manages to make his leg twitch)''\ |
| 667 | '''Lopez:''' Oh... espera un minuto. (Oh... wait a minute.) |
| 668 | * Doyle is [[RunningGag "a leader, not a fighter".]] |
| 669 | |
| 670 | [[AC: Episode 19: You Know Who We Are]] |
| 671 | * As Palomo is recounting how he and the recruits rescued the Reds and Blues, he mentions how Tucker (despite bleeding out) managed to have the strength to give out praise... [[ThatLiarLies only for Tucker himself to show up and call bullshit]]. |
| 672 | -->'''Tucker''': What I ''actually'' told you was to stop crying and to shut the fuck up! |
| 673 | -->'''Palomo''': ...Okay, yeah, but the sentiment was still there! |
| 674 | -->'''Tucker''': I fucking ''hate you'', Palomo. |
| 675 | * Sarge makes Doyle promote him to Colonel so he outranks Grif again. In the credits, he is even listed as Col. Sarge. |
| 676 | -->'''Sarge:''' ''(yelling at Grif from above)'' You hear that, numbnuts?! I outrank you, again! [[WhosLaughingNow Hah!]] |
| 677 | * Lt Smith revealing that his middle name is Elizabeth. |
| 678 | -->'''Smith:''' Or my name isn't John Elizabeth [[BrickJoke Andersmith]]!\ |
| 679 | '''Tucker:''' Oh god, is it? |
| 680 | * Epsilon teasing Carolina about her performance against the Mercs. |
| 681 | * "From your friends, the incredibly badass and sexually attractive Red and Blue soldiers of Project Freelancer. PS: [[SophisticatedAsHell Suck our balls.]]" |
| 682 | ---- |
| 683 | [[/folder]] |
| 684 | |
| 685 | [[folder:Season 13]] |
| 686 | [[quoteright:350:https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/13_15_11.png]] |
| 687 | [[caption-width-right:350:"Dammit! We suck at hiding!"]] |
| 688 | |
| 689 | [[AC: Episode 1: Prologue]] |
| 690 | * In a dark way, Felix casually and bluntly explaining to the crew of the ''Tartarus'' that he's going to kill all of them and take their prisoners. |
| 691 | * The Mercs letting the prisoners know of the change of command of the ship. |
| 692 | -->'''Locus:''' Quiet... As of this moment, we are the new crew of this ship.\ |
| 693 | ''(beat)''\ |
| 694 | '''Random Prisoner:''' Well, who the hell are you?!\ |
| 695 | '''Felix:''' ''(taking the microphone while giving Locus a "you tried" pat on the shoulder)'' Why don't you let the "people person" handle this, okay? |
| 696 | * At the end of his sales pitch, Felix requests that anyone who was willing to accept his offer to "firmly grasp the bars of [their] cell in a sign of solidarity". And as soon as most do, [[ThrownOutTheAirlock Felix immediately opens up all the airlocks]]. The humor comes from the fact that [[MortonsFork we can clearly see that some of the people who chose to hold onto their bars still got sucked out]]. |
| 697 | ** And after the purge, Locus deadpans "Congratulations, you're hired." before dropping the mic and walking away. |
| 698 | |
| 699 | [[AC: Episode 2: Capital Assets]] |
| 700 | * Matthews has thanked Grif for what he and the rest of his friends have done for them. 56 times. He's happy Grif hasn't gotten annoyed. Grif has. |
| 701 | * Simmons's and Donut's fashion-related commentary on the Fed Gunner's armor. |
| 702 | ** Similarly, the Fed Gunner commenting on [[OnlySixFaces how his armor and]] {{BFG}} [[LampshadeHanging make him look distinctive]]. Even better? His distinct choice of weapon and armor make him look like he'll be an important recurring character. ''He isn't.'' While he appears a couple of times towards the end of the series, he's never given an important role or even a name. |
| 703 | * Simmons telling the arguing soldiers that the armory is no place for violence and that if they won't calm down, he won't give them a gun. |
| 704 | * Lopez asking that Jensen not be allowed to drive the vehicles she fixes anymore because [[DrivesLikeCrazy she drives like "a cross between a blind teen and an blind old lady."]] Unfortunately, his request falls on deaf ears for one very important, recurring, obvious reason: [[ShaggyDogStory Nobody can understand him.]] |
| 705 | -->'''Grif:''' Lopez? I don't speak Spanish. I have ''never'' spoken Spanish. |
| 706 | -->'''Simmons:''' Yeah, get with the times and just assimilate. |
| 707 | -->'''Lopez:''' Presco. Voy a cortarle los frenos a tu próximo Warthog. (Cool. I'm cutting the brakes on your next Warthog.) |
| 708 | * Palomo rendering Wash silent by actually giving a good reason for not doing well at target practice. With a MotorMouth. Also, he's trying to make a smiley face with bullet holes. |
| 709 | * Grif's NoSympathy to Wash making the Lieutenants run laps for his laziness. |
| 710 | ** And when Grif finally leaves the training room, the Lieutenants are finished with their laps. Andersmith is no worse for wear and actually seems a bit chipper, while the others are visibly exhausted (with poor Palomo literally ''dragging himself along the ground'' by the end of it). |
| 711 | * Doyle actually managing to get in some good snark at Kimball. |
| 712 | -->'''Grif:''' Hey! We have a problem!\ |
| 713 | ''(beat)''\ |
| 714 | '''Doyle:''' ''([[DeathGlare looking at Kimball]])'' [[SarcasmMode Is it tan with a blue visor?]] |
| 715 | * And why was Grif searching for the Generals for the majority of the episode and interrupting their important meeting? Why, to demand extra rations! [[BigEater Including bigger steaks!]] Suffice to say, Kimball gets so irritated by this that she assigns him to dishwashing duty to get him out of her hair. |
| 716 | * Tucker doing a taunting victory dance in front of some captured Space Pirates to the tune of [[Music/{{Queen}} Another One Bites The Dust]], with Sarge singing along behind him. Carolina, [[NotSoAboveItAll with quite a bit of humor in her voice]], tells them to stop, because they don't need to inflict cruel and unusual punishment. Church, meanwhile is left confused by it all. |
| 717 | -->'''Church''': In all the years we spent in the canyon, when the ''hell'' did he learn to dance? |
| 718 | |
| 719 | [[AC: Episode 3: What's Yours is Ours]] |
| 720 | * Apparently the alien towers are a regular tourist attraction to the people of Chorus... and they had funnel cake. Epsilon freaks out about [[UnusuallyUninterestingSight how nonchalantly they treat the towers.]] |
| 721 | -->'''Epsilon:''' [[LetMeGetThisStraight Okay, I'm gonna stop you right there.]] You're telling ''me'' that people on this planet are just ''used'' to seeing flying space shit like that?!\ |
| 722 | '''Fed Soldier:''' Pretty much. ''(calls out to other soldier)'' Hey, Randy! You ever seen one of those alien towers before?\ |
| 723 | '''Randy:''' Oh, yeah! My dad took me to one when I was a kid!\ |
| 724 | '''Fed Soldier:''' They're nice, right?\ |
| 725 | '''Randy:''' Oh yeah! They had funnel cake right outside, too!\ |
| 726 | '''Fed Soldier:''' I remember that!\ |
| 727 | '''Randy:''' ''(laughs)'' Yeah. Good times!\ |
| 728 | '''Fed Soldier:''' ''(to Epsilon)'' So, yeah. Pretty common.\ |
| 729 | '''Epsilon:''' How is this not a bigger deal?!\ |
| 730 | '''Fed Soldier:''' Well, come on, man. I mean, they've been around forever and they don't really do anything...\ |
| 731 | '''Epsilon''': '''''[[SuddenlyShouting IT'S A GIANT FLYING TOWER!]]'''''\ |
| 732 | '''Fed Soldier:''' And you're a dead guy that's also somehow an [=A.I.=], okay? That shit's weird too, [[LampshadeHanging but you don't hear]] ''[[LampshadeHanging me]]'' [[LampshadeHanging going on about it!]] |
| 733 | * The return of Dr Grey. Church and Carolina are [[SarcasmMode clearly thrilled to be having to deal with her again.]] |
| 734 | -->'''Dr Grey:''' I can't tell you how nice it is to get out of the office and away from all the complaining! "My leg hurts!" "I need blood!" "But I don't ''want'' to have a robot arm!" |
| 735 | ** [[BrickJoke Then it's revealed that the robot arm is]] something that ''[[MadScientist Sarge]]'' requested. |
| 736 | * When Grey makes a discovery, her squeal over the radios is painful both in and out of universe. Then she gets in a struggle with somebody on her end, fighting over the microphone. |
| 737 | * The comments about how [[SpeedSex "fast"]] Tucker is. He's very defensive about it. Which elicits a [[ContinuityNod "Wait, what?"]] reaction from Epsilon. |
| 738 | * Simmons taking offense to Dr. Grey saying that he's the smartest, or at least smarter [[DamnedByFaintPraise than his friends.]] |
| 739 | -->'''Simmons:''' (heartbroken) Why did you feel the need to clarify that?! |
| 740 | * Caboose finally returning to go on a field trip. And consequently running amok of the base, including at one point crashing a Mongoose. |
| 741 | -->'''Caboose:''' [[LiteralMinded We are going to a field!]] |
| 742 | * And it was Church's idea to bring Caboose along. And Tucker, the only other Blue going on the "field trip", is not grateful for it. |
| 743 | -->'''Tucker:''' ([[DeathGlare while glaring at Church]]) Church?\ |
| 744 | '''Church:''' ([[{{Troll}} cheerily]]) Yeah?\ |
| 745 | '''Tucker:''' You're dead to me. |
| 746 | -->'''Church:''' (In a rapid-fire tone) [[BlatantLies Yeah that's tough, crying on the inside,]] don't forget to pack his lunch. [[BigBrotherInstinct Oh, and he needs to take that pill twice a day!]] |
| 747 | |
| 748 | [[AC: Episode 4: Tourist Trap]] |
| 749 | * Sarge berates Caboose for yelling at the base to when they're trying to scope it out. [[HypocriticalHumor He then yells at the base to ignore Caboose.]] |
| 750 | -->'''Tucker:''' [[SarcasmMode Good save, Sarge.]] |
| 751 | * Freckles was given full control over Caboose's rifle. If Caboose pulls the trigger while aiming at something that isn't an enemy, it fires confetti and makes party sounds. He fires it at a rock that looked like Church. |
| 752 | -->'''Caboose:''' Tucker did it. |
| 753 | * Also, how did Dr. Grey determine that giving control of the rifle to Freckles instead of Caboose was the safer of the two options? |
| 754 | --> '''Dr. Grey:''' I gave Caboose the rifle for about five seconds. What a ''busy'' day at the hospital that turned out to be! |
| 755 | * Dr Grey alternating between her serious and manic modes. |
| 756 | -->'''Dr. Grey:''' ''[Serious]'' This is the audio recording of Doctor Emily Grey. Number 05519. Upon arriving at the excavation site, I made several observations. One: There's a large alien structure protruding from the ground and extending into the sky. Two: ''[Excited]'' It's nice and sunny out today and I love it! End log!\ |
| 757 | '''[[DeadpanSnarker Tucker:]]''' Ladies and gentlemen, the smartest person on the entire planet.\ |
| 758 | '''[[{{Cloudcuckoolander}} Caboose:]]''' I know. It's ''really'' intimidating. |
| 759 | * Apparently, Caboose speaks Wingdings. |
| 760 | --> '''Caboose:''' It's a very misunderstood language. |
| 761 | * The Lieutenants are a bit tired of running laps. [[TheDogBitesBack As a result, they decided to jump Grif when he's heading back to his bunk]]. |
| 762 | -->''(Grif is heading back to his bunk when he finds all four Lieutenants waiting for him)''\ |
| 763 | '''Palomo:''' ''(with faux-cheer)'' Oh, hey, Grif...\ |
| 764 | '''Grif:''' Uhhh... hello...?\ |
| 765 | '''Jensen:''' [[DissonantSerenity Can't help but notice you haven't been by the training room yet...]]\ |
| 766 | ''(Grif looks around. The four Lieutenants are being backed up by a mix of Federal Army and New Republic soldiers, all of whom are surrounding Grif.)''\ |
| 767 | '''Grif:''' Is... Wash still making-\ |
| 768 | '''Andersmith:''' [[BluntYes Yep.]]\ |
| 769 | '''Grif:''' [[OhCrap ...And, all of them are...]]\ |
| 770 | '''Bitters:''' '''[[PreAssKickingOneLiner ...Real]]''' [[PreAssKickingOneLiner tired of runnin' laps...]]\ |
| 771 | (beat) |
| 772 | -->'''Grif:''' ([[ScrewThisImOuttaHere starts backing away]]) [[ThisIsGonnaSuck Yeah... I gotta go--]]\ |
| 773 | '''Palomo:''' '''[[SuddenlyShouting TAKE HIM! TAKE HIM]]''' '''''[[SuddenlyShouting NOW!!]]'''''\ |
| 774 | ''(The whole group yells battle cries as they charge at Grif and start pummeling him off-screen)'' |
| 775 | * Caboose starts doing the signature [=RvB=] ArcWords, but spaces out before he can finish. What follows is him thinking he's seen Church - so his first impulse is naturally to try and shoot him. |
| 776 | --> '''Caboose:''' Sorry, kinda spaced out- [[SuddenlyShouting IS THAT CHURCH?!]] ''[[BrickJoke (Freckles makes party noise and confetti flies out)]]'' Nope. Rock. |
| 777 | * Donut is playing around with a supposedly broken plasma rifle, when Simmons comes to berate him for being a bad influence on the kids. |
| 778 | --> '''Donut:''' Children?\ |
| 779 | '''Simmons:''' Oh, right, right, [[EveryonesBabySister Caboose]] went with Sarge, uh, yeah, fuck it, go nuts. |
| 780 | * Tucker and Donut playing with their weapons, prompting their allies on either side to think aloud that the other side of the civil war probably didn't have to put up with this nonsense. |
| 781 | * After all of the alien devices go berserk and blow up, Lopez walks into the armory, takes one look at the wreckage, and says what is translated as "I'm '''not''' cleaning that up." |
| 782 | |
| 783 | [[AC: Episode 5: No Fighting in the War Room]] |
| 784 | * Felix dealing with the revelation that the Insurrectionist Flame guy actually calls himself "Sharkface". |
| 785 | -->'''Felix:''' Pfftt, Sharkface, Locus[[note]]who is standing right there; his codename comes from his "Locus" helmet[[/note]], whatever happened to normal fucking names? [[RhetoricalQuestionBlunder I mean, am I crazy?]]\ |
| 786 | '''The Counselor:''' Well...\ |
| 787 | '''Felix:''' ''Don't'' psychoanalyze me![[note]]As revealed in Season 14, Felix is not his given name, but in fact a codename. Thus this ends up being hypocritical in hindsight[[/note]] |
| 788 | * Even before that is Felix's initial assertion after finding out the Insurrectionist Flame Guy's name: |
| 789 | -->'''The Counselor:''' He calls himself "Sharkface."\ |
| 790 | '''Felix:''' [[LampshadeHanging What is he, a Batman villain?]] |
| 791 | * Tucker carries a physical picture of Junior with his 5th grade basketball team.[[note]]The human kids in the picture are employees of Rooster Teeth.[[/note]] |
| 792 | -->'''Doyle:''' Well... that's the last thing I expected to see today... or ever. |
| 793 | * After spending the last few episodes telling Sarge how much he wished [[TemptingFate he could see his fearless leader in action out in the battlefield]], Simmons gets his wish: |
| 794 | -->'''Donut:''' Well, if you really wanna go, Lopez and I can handle the armory.\ |
| 795 | '''Sarge:''' Excellent suggestion, Donut. Simmons, looks like you're gonna get to see your fearless Colonel on the battlefield after all. heheheh I wish I could look through your eyes, and see me...\ |
| 796 | '''Simmons:''' [[FlatJoy Yay...]]\ |
| 797 | '''Grif [to Donut]:''' I'm gonna kill you in your sleep. |
| 798 | * Grif lamenting losing yet another alien weapon. |
| 799 | * Andersmith goes to the armory while Donut's on break. Nobody's there, yet the 'open' sign is out, so he'll give them two more hours. Seems Caboose really ''is'' influencing him! |
| 800 | |
| 801 | [[AC: Episode 6: Along Came a Spider]] |
| 802 | * Wash’s [[ThisIsGonnaSuck reaction]] to hearing [[DrivesLikeCrazy Jensen]] drive by. Quickly justified in that there is an immediate and literal pileup with her and her Warthog on top. Simmons is utterly baffled [[ViolationOfCommonSense how she was able to do that much damage that quickly while only driving at 5 miles an hour]]. But don’t worry, [[ButtMonkey Palomo]] comes out unharmed! Well, at least until Bitters crashes his Warthog into him. |
| 803 | -->'''Bitters:''' This where we parking the cars? |
| 804 | * Back when he first arrived in Blood Gulch, Church tricked Caboose by telling him that the gas cans in the Warthogs had lemonade... And Caboose has been treating them as such since. This includes just before blowing out his birthday candles. |
| 805 | -->'''Caboose:''' Yep, I wished I was a dragon. That was the best Birthday ''ever.'' |
| 806 | * Epsilon tries to get Carolina to loosen up a bit...[[EpicFail and she fails miserably at it]]. [[{{Adorkable}} Carolina is also genuinely confused about what she's doing wrong.]] |
| 807 | -->'''Church:''' (after Tucker's filled up their Warthogs with gasoline) Oh, that was fast. You filled up our car too?\ |
| 808 | '''Tucker:''' Yeah, I gave it to both of them. [[CatchphraseInterruptus Bow-chicka bow-]]\ |
| 809 | '''Carolina:''' (at the same time as Tucker) [[BorrowedCatchphrase Bow-chika-bow...]] what? That's the joke, right?\ |
| 810 | '''Tucker:''' Did she just say my thing?!\ |
| 811 | '''Caboose:''' Um, no Tucker. It's [[RunningGag "Hey chicka bum bum."]] ''Awkward.''\ |
| 812 | '''Carolina:''' (to Church) You said to loosen up!\ |
| 813 | '''Church:''' Just a little...''too'' loose. Just... ''tighten'' it back up a little there.\ |
| 814 | '''Tucker:''' (off-screen) [[HypocriticalHumor I feel violated!]] |
| 815 | * Felix does ''not'' like reporting to Hargrove: |
| 816 | -->'''Felix:''' [[EvenEvilHasStandards The guy's a prick.]]\ |
| 817 | '''Locus:''' He's our ''employer''.\ |
| 818 | '''Felix:''' Still a prick. |
| 819 | * And the first thing Hargrove does is chew them out over the alien technology being destroyed by the activation of the Temple of Arms: |
| 820 | -->'''Hargrove''': I had a client who was ''very'' interested in our new Supressor Sub-Machine Gun, '''[[SuddenlyShouting until the]]''' '''''[[PrecisionFStrike bloody]]''''' '''thing blew up in his hands!''' |
| 821 | * Felix's comments after it's all over: |
| 822 | -->'''Felix''': What'd I tell you? '''[[RuleOfThree Fucking prick]]'''. |
| 823 | |
| 824 | [[AC: Episode 7: Locus of Control]] |
| 825 | * Felix's usual direct manner of testing what the portal does. By kicking in a random soldier into it. |
| 826 | -->'''Felix:''' Guess we'll find out. |
| 827 | * When the "volunteer" returns, talking about facing his past: |
| 828 | -->'''Felix:''' Oh man, if we're gonna meet every person we've wronged or some bullshit, it's gonna take forever.\ |
| 829 | '''Locus:''' Quiet.\ |
| 830 | '''Felix:''' Seriously dude, I'm talking ''weeks''! |
| 831 | * Felix's opinion of himself: |
| 832 | -->'''Felix:''' Oh, bullshit! I know what this is about! Why do you know I'm not the true warrior?\ |
| 833 | '''Locus:''' Because you're ''you.''\ |
| 834 | '''Felix:''' Yeah, and being me is awesome! |
| 835 | * Felix managing to verbally trip up Locus. |
| 836 | -->'''Felix:''' Just don't cry to me when you lose.\ |
| 837 | '''Locus:''' I won't. ''(Awkward {{Beat}})'' Lose, I, I won't ''lose.''\ |
| 838 | '''Felix:''' ''(chuckles)'' Too late, fucked it up! |
| 839 | |
| 840 | [[AC: Episode 8: Test Your Might]] |
| 841 | * [[ContinuityNod The crappy superpowers discussion returns]]: |
| 842 | --> '''Sarge:''' Now look, the fact of the matter is the ability to fly north, and only north, is just gonna lead to more problems than it solves.\ |
| 843 | '''Simmons:''' Thank you!\ |
| 844 | '''Grif:''' ''(scoffs)'' Whatever, this road trip sucks!\ |
| 845 | '''Sarge:''' Nonsense! Road trips are an inherent part of the Red Team experience! Enjoy the exotic sights and sounds of this beautiful, albeit wartorn, land!\ |
| 846 | '''Grif:''' It's a ''gas station.'' That we've ''been to before!'' [[LeaningOnTheFourthWall Seriously, there's like three places to go on the whole planet!]] |
| 847 | * Wash's failed attempt at a FriendshipMoment has him acting so [[OOCIsSeriousBusiness Out of Character]] that the Reds take notice and are suitably unnerved. It's hinted that he thinks that they're all going to die, which Grif quickly calls him out on. |
| 848 | -->'''Wash:''' You know, I think it's ''really'' admirable that [[IChooseToStay you all chose to stay and fight for the people of Chorus.]]\ |
| 849 | '''Simmons:''' (surprised) Oh. Thanks, Wash!\ |
| 850 | '''Wash:''' When I first met you all, [[BrutalHonesty I honestly thought you'd never amount to anything]], but you've really proven me wrong!\ |
| 851 | '''Grif:''' (confused) ...Uhhhh, cool. Thanks, dude.\ |
| 852 | '''Wash:''' Sure, [[ArmedFarces you may not be the most]]... ''[[DysfunctionJunction conventional]]'' [[ArmedFarces soldiers]], but no matter the challenge [[CrouchingMoronHiddenBadass you always manage to find a way to come out on top.]] And that's something ''really'' special!\ |
| 853 | '''Sarge:''' (warily) What's going on with you?\ |
| 854 | '''Wash:''' (quickly) [[HesitationEqualsDishonesty Me? Nothing.]]\ |
| 855 | '''Simmons:''' No, you're acting ''really'' weird.\ |
| 856 | '''Wash:''' I just want you all to know how much I appreciate you. ([[{{Beat}} brief pause]]) That's it!\ |
| 857 | '''Grif:''' [[OhCrap YOU THINK WE'RE GONNA]] ''[[PrecisionFStrike FUCKING DIE!]]''\ |
| 858 | '''Wash:''' [[BlatantLies No, I don't!]]\ |
| 859 | '''Grif:''' No, you do, you ''definitely'' do! You're getting all sentimental and shit!\ |
| 860 | '''Wash:''' [[BadLiar Nooo, guys. Come on! You'll be fine.]] I've got total faith in you! You're some of the ''best'' soldiers I ever knew!\ |
| 861 | '''Simmons:''' [[SuddenlyShouting WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT PAST-TENSE BULLSHIT?!]]\ |
| 862 | '''Wash:''' Look, I just want you to know, I'm ''[[SoProudOfYou proud]]'' [[SoProudOfYou of you.]] I'm sure if you stick together, you'll be okay. [[TemptingFate What unit are you in?]]\ |
| 863 | '''Sarge:''' (happily) [[TooDumbToLive Volunteered for the front lines!]]\ |
| 864 | '''Wash:''' ''[[ThisIsGonnaSuck ...Oh.]]''\ |
| 865 | '''Grif:''' (horrified) YOU ''WHAT?!!''\ |
| 866 | '''Simmons:''' ''[[WhatTheHellHero SARGE!!]]''\ |
| 867 | '''Wash:''' (weakly) Well, look on the bright side!\ |
| 868 | ''(Awkward {{Beat}})''\ |
| 869 | '''Grif:''' [[LampshadeHanging You know, if you say that, you're supposed to follow it up]] ''[[LampshadeHanging with the bright side!!]]''\ |
| 870 | '''Wash:''' (sheepishly) [[NotHelpingYourCase ...I know.]] |
| 871 | * Tucker's "attempt" on the true warrior test. [[EpicFail He goes in and gets sent back out immediately.]] |
| 872 | ** There's also this brief but hilarious exchange beforehand after Tucker says that his sword could grant him access through the testing grounds: |
| 873 | --->'''Dr. Grey:''' Tucker has a point! [[StealthInsult It's possible that merely carrying the sword through the portal will override the need to be strong and intelligent]].\ |
| 874 | '''Tucker:''' Yeah! [[VerbalBackspace ...Wait,]] I'm strong and intelligent!\ |
| 875 | '''Caboose:''' ([[DeadpanSnarker dismissively]]) [[DamnedByFaintPraise Eh, you have your]] ''[[DamnedByFaintPraise moments...]]'' |
| 876 | * Dr. Grey says the UNSC had ample time to study the ruins and gave up, whereas they've only been there a few minutes. Cut to some UNSC equipment that was left behind with a label marked "Fuck You!" |
| 877 | * The [=A.I.=] finds his true warrior in Caboose...whom he quickly realizes is too idiotic to get what he's talking about. |
| 878 | -->'''Alien [=A.I.=]:''' My apologies, but is there ''anyone'' else I could speak to? Perhaps someone with a broader vocabulary? |
| 879 | * Caboose names the alien [=A.I.=] Santa. Everybody is dumbfounded... except for the [=A.I.=]. The icing on the cake? The music itself stops shortly after this particular revelation, as if to ask, "Wait, what?" |
| 880 | |
| 881 | [[AC: Episode 9: You Better Watch Out]] |
| 882 | * Kimball's caravan is brought to a screeching halt when she hears that the away team "[[ARareSentence apparently found Santa]]." |
| 883 | * Among the various devices left behind by the aliens on the planet is the Temple of Procreation, which was designed to "throw the inhabitants of Chorus into a rabid sexual frenzy with the intent to increase a potentially dwindling population." There's also the Temples of Weather Control, Gravity Control[[note]]the source of the tractor beams[[/note]], Arms[[note]]the armory Sarge, Dr. Grey, Tucker, and Caboose discovered[[/note]], Communication, [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking and Interior Decorating.]] |
| 884 | ** Even better is the tone shift in the music when Santa elaborates on the Temple of Procreation. The strings that follow just ''scream'' [[LovableSexManiac 'Lavernius Tucker']]. |
| 885 | * The Forerunner [=A.I.=] overseeing the Temples is named ''[[InsistentTerminology Santa]]'', thank you very much. |
| 886 | -->'''Church:''' I ''refuse'' to call you that! |
| 887 | * Sarge's BloodKnight tendencies strike yet again. |
| 888 | -->''(After the Reds run over the space pirates with the Warthog, complete with the [[RunningGag iconic Tejano music playing from the vehicle]])''\ |
| 889 | '''Sarge:''' Ya see! I told you the front line is where the action is! Ha ha!\ |
| 890 | '''Simmons:''' That's why we ''didn't'' wanna be here!\ |
| 891 | '''Sarge:''' Ah, nonsense. ''(turns on the radio)'' This is Colonel Sarge! We have engaged the enemy! We are in for a short courtship of ''blood!''\ |
| 892 | '''Kimball:''' ''(over the radio)'' Copy that, Red leader. Good work. |
| 893 | |
| 894 | [[AC: Episode 10: Temple of the Key]] |
| 895 | * During the fight at Site Alpha, one of the Fed soldiers is wounded... and, much to the exasperation of the New Republic medic treating him, his grasp of anatomical positioning is a little loose: |
| 896 | --> '''Fed Soldier:''' Oh, god! They shot me right in the lap!\ |
| 897 | '''Republic Medic:''' [[OnlySaneMan ...So, like...the upper thigh...?]] |
| 898 | ** Then, when told that he was also hit in the "tummy," the medic just wearily sighs and mutters that it's going to be a long day. |
| 899 | ** All made the funnier when you realize they are all being played by the ''WebVideo/GameGrumps''. |
| 900 | * Sarge is ecstatic about fighting the overwhelming odds, while Grif and Simmons [[ThisIsGonnaSuck are decidedly less so.]] Sarge's plan for breaking through the Space Pirates' offensive--[[CallBack a slow-motion car crash]]--doesn't improve their optimism. |
| 901 | -->'''Simmons:''' Love the enthusiasm, it's great sir, really, but do you think we could try something that ''won't'' get my head blown off?\ |
| 902 | '''Sarge:''' You could always switch seats with Grif!\ |
| 903 | '''Simmons:''' Done!\ |
| 904 | '''Grif:''' [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere Screw this, we're regrouping with Wash!]] |
| 905 | ** It gets better when Sarge goes to Kimball and Wash. They don't get how he can just ''make'' something slow motion, either. |
| 906 | * Felix being a prick to Sharkface. |
| 907 | -->'''Sharkface:''' This is it.\ |
| 908 | '''Felix:''' [[SarcasmMode Oh, good! You know, I really wasn't sure until you said that! Why don't you put those]] '''[[SarcasmMode amazing]]''' [[SarcasmMode powers of observation to use and stand guard? Okay? Okay!]] \ |
| 909 | ''([[{{Beat}} Felix walks away.]])''\ |
| 910 | '''Sharkface (to random Space Pirate):''' ...Is [[BadBoss he]] ''[[{{Jerkass}} always]]'' [[LampshadeHanging like that?]]\ |
| 911 | '''Space Pirate:''' [[ServileSnarker You just kind of learn to tune it out.]] |
| 912 | * The Space Pirates, headed by Felix and Sharkface, reach the Temple where Chorus' sword-key is being kept... but someone already beat them to it! Who do we have to thank for [[SpannerInTheWorks throwing a spanner into their plan to kill everybody on the planet?]] |
| 913 | -->'''General Doyle:''' [[ThisIsGonnaSuck Oh lord.]] Of all the people on this planet, why am ''[[LovableCoward I]]'' the only one down here with this bloody thing?!\ |
| 914 | '''Donut:''' ''(Over radio)'' Duh! Because all your other men are flying to Kimball and Carolina. ''(Cut to Donut and Lopez flying a plane)'' Besides, you've got the best camouflage out of all of us!\ |
| 915 | '''General Doyle:''' Just circle back around and pick me up, for God's sake!\ |
| 916 | '''Lopez:''' El templo todavía está interfiriendo con nuestros controles. Vamos a tener que aterrizar más lejos. (The temple is still interfering with our controls. We'll have to land farther away.)\ |
| 917 | '''Donut:''' Good point, Lopez. You get that, General?\ |
| 918 | '''General Doyle:''' What? No! ''I no hablo Español!'' |
| 919 | * Guess who's back? [[TheBusCameBack Doc, the medic!]] However, the Reds and Blues [[ButtMonkey barely remember that he even vanished]] in the ''first'' place. Suffice to say, Caboose and Tucker are both quite surprised when Doc appears. |
| 920 | -->'''Tucker:''' Hey, Sarge?\ |
| 921 | '''Sarge:''' What do you want, Blue?\ |
| 922 | '''Tucker:''' Do you remember teleporting Doc back at the canyon?\ |
| 923 | '''Sarge:''' Doc? No, he's been with us! ...I think, or wait... was he with you?\ |
| 924 | '''Tucker:''' I found him in a cave! Said he was in "another dimension"!\ |
| 925 | '''Sarge:''' ...Well ''that'' don't sound right at all. Grif, Simmons! You remember sending Doc to another dimension?\ |
| 926 | '''Simmons:''' Who?\ |
| 927 | '''Sarge:''' Doc! The purple guy!\ |
| 928 | '''Grif:''' Doc... Hmmm... Oh, ''yeah!'' I guess we ''did'' do that.\ |
| 929 | '''Tucker:''' Yeah, I totally forgot too!\ |
| 930 | '''Simmons:''' Huh. I guess he's just got one of those faces. Y'know, like ''really'' [[ForgettableCharacter forgettable]]! |
| 931 | ** And naturally, poor Doc [[SanitySlippage doesn't take it that well when he realizes he was literally forgotten about.]] |
| 932 | --->'''Doc:''' ''(suddenly lapses into an O'Malley SplitPersonality)'' You incompetent fools! You will all taste OBLIVION! |
| 933 | ** And Caboose, ComicallyMissingThePoint (as per usual) just starts laughing along with Doc. And keeps it up after O'Malley tackles Tucker to give the Blue a beatdown. |
| 934 | --->'''Dr. Grey:''' Um...should we do something?\ |
| 935 | '''Caboose:''' Ahahah- Oh no, he's a friend.\ |
| 936 | '''Tucker:''' ''(off-screen)'' Ow, my insides! |
| 937 | |
| 938 | [[AC: Episode 11: Dish Best Served]] |
| 939 | * One of the Feds seeing the {{Irony}} of an [[BlackComedy "over my dead body" comment]]. |
| 940 | * Dr. Grey [[InLoveWithYourCarnage is delighted]] to have this chance to work with [[DysfunctionJunction such an "interesting" set of personalities]]. |
| 941 | ** It's also worth noting that she and Caboose [[CasualDangerDialogue are having a very calm discussion about Omega while]] Doc in full O'Malley persona is beating the fuck out of Tucker in the background ([[LampshadeHanging much to the frustration of the latter]]). |
| 942 | --->'''Tucker''': I'M ''DYING!!!'' |
| 943 | ** There's also this lovely line from O'Malley [[PunctuatedPounding in between said beating]]: |
| 944 | --->'''O'Malley:''' And take this! ''(punch)'' And that! ''(punch)'' And then take two of these. And call my other personality in the morning! ''(EvilLaugh)'' |
| 945 | ** Dr. Grey then knocks out Doc by whacking him up the back side of his head. |
| 946 | --->'''O'Malley''': [[RunningGag Ow! The back of my head!]] |
| 947 | * The mere fact that part of Washington's plan against Locus has the classic hat-on-a-stick technique. Doubles as a SugarWiki/MomentOfAwesome. |
| 948 | --> ''(Locus looks through his scope and suddenly sees Wash's helmet pop up from behind cover)''\ |
| 949 | '''Wash:''' You still don't feel like talking?\ |
| 950 | '''Locus:''' ''(shoots)'' [[BluntNo No.]]\ |
| 951 | ''(Cut to Washington picking up his helmet and putting it back on)''\ |
| 952 | '''Wash:''' ''Please'' tell me you caught the vapor trail on that shot.\ |
| 953 | ''(Cut to Smith and Bitters behind cover, viewing the situation)''\ |
| 954 | '''Wash:''' ''(over radio)'' [[GenreSavvy He's not gonna fall for the same trick twice.]]\ |
| 955 | '''Bitters:''' Oh, we got him. |
| 956 | * [[BrickJoke Sarge getting his slow motion "Dirtbag."]] And as he and the others drive away: |
| 957 | -->'''Sarge:''' ''Life finds a way!'' |
| 958 | * [[ContinuityNod "What the fuck is with this guy?!"]] |
| 959 | |
| 960 | [[AC: Episode 12: [=Off-Key=]]] |
| 961 | * Locus picking Felix up. |
| 962 | -->'''Felix:''' And you say I talk too much!\ |
| 963 | '''Locus:''' You ''do.'' |
| 964 | * Epsilon's reintroduction after him having shattered into pieces last episode is him "sitting" on the chest of an unconscious Carolina. |
| 965 | -->'''Epsilon:''' ''(glumly)'' [[ThisIsGonnaSuck She is gonna be]] ''[[ThisIsGonnaSuck so]]'' [[ThisIsGonnaSuck pissed off when she wakes up.]] |
| 966 | * When Grif laughs about Wash yelling at Kimball & Doyle [[TeethClenchedTeamwork for acting like children]], Kimball ''immediately'' [[CallBack puts him back on dish duty.]] |
| 967 | * Doyle bitterly telling the Blood Gulch Crew that they know where to find him if they need him. |
| 968 | -->'''Simmons:''' ...Actually, you never actually told us where your quarters are!\ |
| 969 | '''Doyle:''' ''Well then I'm a failure at leaving, too!'' |
| 970 | * Grif and Simmons noting to Wash how hard it can be to invoke an EnemyMine. |
| 971 | --> '''Simmons:''' Well, it took us ''ages'' before we were able to trust the Blues.\ |
| 972 | '''Grif:''' Yeah, ([[AsideGlance looks to his side]]) and '''some''' of us are still working on it.\ |
| 973 | ''(The camera then rotates from Grif and Simmons to Sarge, who is pointing his shotgun into the back of Caboose's head and [[{{Angrish}} muttering incomprehensibly to himself]])'' |
| 974 | |
| 975 | [[AC: Episode 13: The Thin Fed Line]] |
| 976 | * The returned Doc lapsing into his O'Malley persona after having it confirmed that yes, no one [[ForgettableCharacter realized that he had ever disappeared in the first place]]. |
| 977 | -->'''Donut:''' ...And then it turned out that Felix was ''evil'', so we exposed the truth, stopped the civil war, and now we're fighting to send a distress call to Earth!\ |
| 978 | '''Doc:''' ...And at no point, during ''any'' of this, did you realize I was missing?\ |
| 979 | '''Donut:''' ''(Donut and Grey exchange looks)'' ...Apparently not!\ |
| 980 | '''O'Malley:''' Argh, I will destroy you all for your insufferable ignorance! |
| 981 | * [[UnusuallyUninterestingSight Dr. Grey taking the presence of Doc's omnicidal split personality in absolute stride]], and with which is followed by some of the most magnificent ShipTease in the show's history[[note]]The scene is arguably made even funnier with the knowledge that Arryn Zech (Dr. Grey's voice actor) actually ships ''[[CrackShip Sarge/Dr. Grey]]'' in real life and not Doc/Dr. Grey[[/note]]. |
| 982 | -->'''Dr. Grey:''' This is easily the most ''vocal'' split personality I've ever seen! But I suppose an eternity in isolation will do that to you! Now, Mr. O'Malley, when you say you wish to "destroy us all", what ''exactly'' do you mean by that?\ |
| 983 | '''Doc/O'Malley:''' I mean you will cease to exist! You will all die by my hand! Hahahaha! ''({{Beat}})'' [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin Really, it's quite self-explanatory.]]\ |
| 984 | '''Dr. Grey:''' Well, I think there is serious issues here we're just starting to get ahold of! Nothing a little ''electroshock therapy'' couldn't fix.\ |
| 985 | '''Doc/O'Malley:''' [[EvilLaugh Ah-ha ha ha]]--[[OhCrap I beg your pardon?]]\ |
| 986 | '''Dr. Grey:''' (raising an electrode) After ''you,'' handsome.\ |
| 987 | '''Doc:''' Uh, wait! Can't we talk about this?!\ |
| 988 | '''Donut:''' We're gonna fix you right up, Doc! [[AssShove Where should I stick the thermometer?]]\ |
| 989 | '''Doc:''' [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere Uh, I think I need to get a second opinion!]] ''(runs off)''\ |
| 990 | '''Dr. Grey:''' ''We've got a runner!'' |
| 991 | ** Cue Dr. Grey and Donut both chasing the hapless Doc across the base. |
| 992 | -->'''Doc:''' You'll never take me alive! [[CallBack I ran track in high school!]]\ |
| 993 | '''Dr. Grey:''' [[StalkerWithACrush Running only makes me want you]] ''[[StalkerWithACrush more!]]'' |
| 994 | * The Red and Blues try to ease tensions between the Feds and the New Republic. It... doesn't go well. |
| 995 | -->''The scene starts with Grif, Simmons, Sarge, Caboose, and Tucker all standing around Palomo and an unknown Fed soldier in a hallway.''\ |
| 996 | '''Simmons:''' Alright, first let's start with a friendly handshake!\ |
| 997 | '''Palomo:''' ''(glares at the Fed soldier before [[SpitefulSpit he tries to spit on the ground]])'' ...Devil-man.\ |
| 998 | '''Fed Soldier:''' ''(confused)'' [[RunningGag Did you just spit inside of your helmet?]]\ |
| 999 | '''Palomo:''' Take yourself, and ''fuck'' yourself, '''''with yourself!'''''\ |
| 1000 | ''({{Beat}})''\ |
| 1001 | '''Fed Soldier:''' [[FlatWhat ...What?]]\ |
| 1002 | '''Palomo:''' ''(triumphantly)'' [[LogicBomb Exactly!]]\ |
| 1003 | '''Tucker:''' ''(exasperated)'' [[RunningGag Goddammit, Palomo.]]\ |
| 1004 | '''Simmons:''' ''(hesitantly)'' [[DamnedByFaintPraise ...Well, it's a step up from assault and battery.]]\ |
| 1005 | '''Palomo:''' ''(faces Simmons)'' He provoked me!\ |
| 1006 | '''Fed Soldier:''' You rebels are all ''fucking'' nuts.\ |
| 1007 | '''Palomo:''' [[ComicallyMissingThePoint That's impossible!]] Nuts don't ''have'' orifices, go back to school!\ |
| 1008 | '''Fed Soldier:''' [[DeadpanSnarker What about doughnuts?]]\ |
| 1009 | '''Palomo:''' [[InsaneTrollLogic Now you're just speaking in riddles and you]] ''[[InsaneTrollLogic know it!]]''\ |
| 1010 | ''(Another {{Beat}})''\ |
| 1011 | '''Sarge:''' [[LampshadeHanging ...I'm having a hard time following this conversation.]]\ |
| 1012 | '''Tucker:''' ''(sighs)'' Forget it. You guys can go.\ |
| 1013 | ''The Fed Soldier leaves. Palomo [[HeroWorship looks expectantly at Tucker.]]''\ |
| 1014 | '''Palomo:''' ''(hopefully)'' How'd I do?\ |
| 1015 | '''Tucker:''' ''(profoundly annoyed)'' You are a ''constant'' source of disappointment.\ |
| 1016 | '''Palomo:''' ''(smugly)'' [[ComicallyMissingThePoint All right!]] ''(walks away)''\ |
| 1017 | '''[[TheDitz Caboose]]:''' Heeeeeyyyyyy... I thought ''[[ITakeOffenseToThatLastOne I]]'' [[ITakeOffenseToThatLastOne was a constant source of disappointment.]] Well, ''I'' will just have to try ''[[SuddenlyShouting harder!]]'' '''[[NoIndoorVoice SOMEONE GET ME, A]]''' '''''[[NoodleImplements SCREWDRIVER!!!]]''''' |
| 1018 | * Grif's follow-up plan is to invite Doyle and Kimball to the same restaurant, telling them that the other wanted to apologize to them. When Simmons points out that this is essentially the same plot idea used in old sitcoms, Grif promptly shows that he's inherited some of Sarge's InsaneTrollLogic and capacity for BatDeduction: |
| 1019 | -->'''Grif:''' And one of ''those'' old sitcoms was called ''Series/{{Friends}}'', and that's exactly what we want [Doyle and Kimball] to be! ''Case closed!'' |
| 1020 | * Epsilon-Church comparing his inability to run multiple Freelancer gadgets [[TheLoinsSleepTonight to another set of "performance issues".]] |
| 1021 | * Epsilon sarcastically hopes that the mercenaries are just as frustrated as the rest of the Blood Gulch Crew are. Cut to Felix discovering how he's ended up with a MeaninglessVillainVictory-- yes, he intimidated General Doyle into surrendering the key, but since said key is still bonded to ''Doyle,'' Felix can't use it! And Sharkface is proving completely dry-witted in the face of Felix's borderline VillainousBreakdown, provoking him further, [[OnlySaneMan thus leaving it to]] ''[[TheDreaded Locus]]'' to keep them from killing each other. |
| 1022 | -->'''Felix:''' (banging the sword-key against a table) [[PunctuatedForEmphasis I! AM EXTREMELY! FRUSTRATED!]] |
| 1023 | ** Part of his angry rant against Sharkface includes calling him "Fishstick." |
| 1024 | |
| 1025 | [[AC: Episode 14: Counseling]] |
| 1026 | * Wash starts the episode angrily freaking out to the Blood Gulch Crew over how they're going to stop the CivilWar from starting back up. They're not as worried though, as Sarge has come up with a plan involving Doc! |
| 1027 | -->'''Sarge:''' Don't you worry your pretty little yellow striped head, Wash! We've got ''everything'' under control.\ |
| 1028 | '''Wash:''' '''''[[RageBreakingPoint How!?]]'''''\ |
| 1029 | '''Doc:''' [[ARareSentence An honest and down-to-earth counseling session!]]\ |
| 1030 | '''Wash:''' ''[[FlatWhat ...What?]]'' |
| 1031 | * Doc's counseling session then derails ''very'' quickly. |
| 1032 | -->'''Doc:''' A counseling session! Just you two and your closest friends, here to talk and support you.\ |
| 1033 | '''Kimball:''' This is a waste of time.\ |
| 1034 | '''Doyle:''' I concur.\ |
| 1035 | '''Doc:''' [[ComicallyMissingThePoint See, you're already agreeing on things! The system works!]]\ |
| 1036 | '''Wash:''' (turning to Doyle and Kimball) [[ThisIsGonnaSuck I am]] '''[[ThisIsGonnaSuck so]]''' [[ThisIsGonnaSuck sorry.]] |
| 1037 | * When Doc first suggests role-playing, Donut calls being the cop, eliciting a FlatWhat response from Simmons. |
| 1038 | * Grif and Doc roleplay as each other. Unfortunately, O'Malley takes over and then gives a ''really'' hurtful TheReasonYouSuckSpeech to poor Grif. |
| 1039 | --> '''Grif:''' ''(unenthusiastically)'' Um, hey! Look at me, everyone, I'm Doc.\ |
| 1040 | '''Doc:''' ''(entering the O'Malley personality)'' And I'm Dexter Grif, reporting for duty! Oh, wait, never mind! I forgot that I'm a pathetic sack of waste [[LazyBum that wouldn't be caught]] ''dead'' following orders, because I'm too busy wishing [[TheUnfavourite my parents loved me as much as my sister!]] ''(Evil laugh)'' Maybe if I had a stable father figure growing up, [[FreudianExcuse I wouldn't be so opposed to order]]! But I guess that's just what happens when [[YourMom your mother]] turns tricks behind the elephant cage at the ''circus!'' ''(Evil laugh)'' Here, Dex, have some more ''cotton candy!'' ''([[RuleOfThree Evil laugh]])''\ |
| 1041 | ''([[StunnedSilence Everyone turns to stare at Grif]])''\ |
| 1042 | '''Grif:''' ''(voice breaking)'' It was a nice circus...\ |
| 1043 | '''Doc:''' ''(returning to normal, apologetic)'' Oh, gosh. Sorry about that... Maybe we should try something else?\ |
| 1044 | '''Sarge:''' ''(cheerily)'' I dunno! I think we're making progress! |
| 1045 | * Later, Caboose and Tucker go up to talk about their feelings. |
| 1046 | -->'''Caboose:''' Tucker, when you call me names like stupid, and ''really'' stupid, it makes me feel sad.\ |
| 1047 | '''Tucker:''' Caboose, when ''you'' volunteered us to demonstrate speaking our feelings, it made ''me'' feel like hitting ''you'' in the goddamn mouth.\ |
| 1048 | '''Caboose:''' Yes. Well, now I feel sadder. ''(awkwardly coughs)'' Are we doing this right?\ |
| 1049 | '''Doc:''' Right as rain!\ |
| 1050 | '''Caboose:''' Oh! Good! Well then [[SuddenlyShouting NOW I FEEL HAPPY AGAIN!]] ''[[LargeHam I LOVE COUNSELING!]]'' |
| 1051 | |
| 1052 | [[AC: Episode 15: Armonia, Part One]] |
| 1053 | * Sarge doing a supply check: |
| 1054 | -->'''Sarge:''' Ammo!\ |
| 1055 | '''Simmons:''' Check!\ |
| 1056 | '''Sarge:''' Machine gun!\ |
| 1057 | '''Caboose:''' Check!\ |
| 1058 | '''Sarge:''' Rocket launcher! ''({{Beat}})'' Rocket launcher...?\ |
| 1059 | '''Doc/O'Malley:''' ''(Steps into frame, loading a rocket launcher)'' Oh, you better ''goddamn believe it.'' [[EvilLaugh Muhehehehehe]]...\ |
| 1060 | '''Tucker:''' ''(regarding Doc/O'Malley)'' I am '''not''' sitting next to him on the plane.\ |
| 1061 | '''Simmons:''' Shotgun!\ |
| 1062 | '''Sarge:''' Check! |
| 1063 | * When the time comes to take off, Grif can't get the Pelican started. It seems like something's stuck in the engines. Grif laments that Lopez isn't around to find the problem... |
| 1064 | -->'''Grif:''' ...Wait a minute. Where ''is'' Lopez?\ |
| 1065 | '''Simmons:''' ''(Over the radio)'' The last I saw him, he was in the garage!\ |
| 1066 | ''(Cue pounding noises coming from the engine, with the muffled voice of Lopez yelling)''\ |
| 1067 | '''Lopez:''' ''¡Pendejo!'' ''(Stupid!)''\ |
| 1068 | '''Grif:''' [[OhCrap Oh, shit.]]\ |
| 1069 | '''Lopez:''' ''¡ESTABA ARREGLANDO EL MOTOR, VETE A LA MIERDA!'' ''(I WAS FIXING THE ENGINE, YOU FUCK!)'' |
| 1070 | * When the Space Pirates start closing in on their position, the Blood Gulch Crew "hide." [[CallBack Grif makes a snowman to hide in. And Caboose just stands out in the open while facing away from the door.]] |
| 1071 | -->'''Simmons:''' Dammit! We suck at hiding! |
| 1072 | |
| 1073 | [[AC: Episode 16: Armonia, Part Two]] |
| 1074 | * Unable to break into the motor pool where the Reds and Blues are [[HoldTheLine holding them off until the Pelican can get airborne]], the space pirates [[MistakenForBadass assume that they're dealing with the best soldiers that Chorus' inhabitants can throw at them]]. In truth, they're being held off by such characters as a CloudCuckoolander with an auto-targeting assault rifle, a TechnicalPacifist with an AxCrazy SplitPersonality wielding a rocket launcher, and a DrillSergeantNasty with a penchant for InsaneTrollLogic carrying a [[GatlingGood mounted machine gun]]. |
| 1075 | * Simmons manages to extricate Lopez's parts from the Pelican's engine-- which Lopez celebrates by using his remote-controlled headless body to strangle Grif, [[LaserGuidedKarma who had gotten him mangled by the engine in the first place.]] |
| 1076 | * When Doyle reaches the reactor controls, [[FreezeFrameBonus the text crawl on the main terminal reads as follows]]: |
| 1077 | -->'''Reactor Terminal:''' Do not touch. ''(beat)'' Seriously. Don't. ''(beat)'' DANGEROUS. |
| 1078 | * [[invoked]] While simultaneously [[SugarWiki/MomentofAwesome awesome]] and [[TearJerker saddening]], Sharkface's death is also [[BlackComedy darkly hilarious.]] |
| 1079 | -->'''Sharkface:''' ...As long as I'm alive, you're all as good as DEAD!\ |
| 1080 | ''(Wash and Kimball turn to each other, shrug, and [[WhyDontYaJustShootHim promptly riddle him with bullets]])'' |
| 1081 | * Doyle wants to quote Shakespeare as part of his HeroicSacrifice, but sheepishly admits that the quote he had in mind didn't actually come from the Bard. |
| 1082 | * As of this episode, Doyle, of ''all'' people, has the ''[[https://youtu.be/Mme3pQFy3Gg?t=33m48s highest kill count of the series.]]'' |
| 1083 | |
| 1084 | [[AC: Episode 17: All or Nothing]] |
| 1085 | * Church and Carolina compare attacking the Communications Temple guarded by Charon Industries' elite guard to a round of "Capture the Flag." This does little to encourage the Blood Gulch Crew: |
| 1086 | -->'''Grif:''' You ''know'' [[CallBack we're terrible at Capture the Flag, right?]]\ |
| 1087 | '''Simmons:''' So, ''assuming'' all of this plays out the way we ''hope'' it will, we ''still'' need to [[StormingTheCastle take over a heavily-fortified alien tower]]. [[ThisIsGonnaSuck Anybody else seeing a problem here?]]\ |
| 1088 | '''Sarge:''' We emptied the armory as best we could, but we're ''still'' not exactly armed to the teeth.\ |
| 1089 | '''Doc:''' It's also worth mentioning that half of our army ''still'' hates the other half of our army. |
| 1090 | * Felix, meanwhile, is having as much fun as Tucker concerning him activating his Energy Sword. |
| 1091 | * While mostly a mixture of TearJerker, NightmareFuel, and simultaneous [[SugarWiki/HeartwarmingMoments Heartwarming]] and [[SugarWiki/MomentOfAwesome Awesome]], there is ''one'' funny part near the beginning of Kimball's speech: |
| 1092 | -->'''Kimball:''' Excuse me, if I could have your attention please. I know many of you probably don't care for what I have to say, but it's something that needs to be said.\ |
| 1093 | '''Wash:''' Think she can do this?\ |
| 1094 | '''Tucker:''' [[TemptingFate Hell yeah! Kimball's a great speaker!]]\ |
| 1095 | '''Kimball:''' [[BrutalHonesty I never believed this truce would last.]]\ |
| 1096 | '''Tucker:''' [[OhCrap Ohh-ho-hoh God, we're screwed!]] |
| 1097 | |
| 1098 | [[AC: Episode 18: Great Destroyers]] |
| 1099 | * Wash and Felix's BossBanter has quite a few gems. |
| 1100 | -->[[invoked]] ''([[SugarWiki/MomentOfAwesome Wash effortlessly catches all of Felix's throwing knives]])''\ |
| 1101 | '''Felix:''' [[OhCrap Huh?]]\ |
| 1102 | '''Wash:''' ''(smugly)'' You think you're the ''only'' one who's good with knives?\ |
| 1103 | ''(Felix draws his sword)''\ |
| 1104 | '''Wash''' [[DidntThinkThisThrough ...Oh. Right.]] |
| 1105 | * At one point, Carolina snags Felix with her grapple gun. Felix grabs on to Wash, [[TakingYouWithMe dragging him off the platform with him]]. |
| 1106 | -->'''Wash:''' ''(dangling above the lava trench around the Purge Tower)'' OHHHHHHH MY GOD!\ |
| 1107 | '''Felix:''' You drop me, you drop us both!\ |
| 1108 | '''Wash:''' ''(waving his hands frantically)'' [[PunctuatedForEmphasis DO! NOT! DROP HIM!]] |
| 1109 | * Felix inadvertently pierces the power source of a [[FloatingPlatforms floating platform]]... while they're all standing on it. Everyone immediately decides to stop fighting and focus on not falling off. |
| 1110 | -->'''Felix:''' [[OhCrap Ohhhhh]]... ''[[ThisIsGonnaSuck shit]]''. |
| 1111 | * Felix continues to be very immature. |
| 1112 | -->'''Felix:''' I'm not tired, [[NoYou YOU'RE TIRED!]] |
| 1113 | ** And earlier, when he and Locus get on a higher platform, he flips off Wash and Carolina. |
| 1114 | --->'''Wash:''' Really? |
| 1115 | * Aiden Price's attempt to FaceDeathWithDignity is arguably ruined by his [[PrecisionFStrike last few words.]] |
| 1116 | -->'''Price:''' [[RunningGag Oh, son of a bitch...]] |
| 1117 | |
| 1118 | [[AC: Episode 19: The End Is Near]] |
| 1119 | * Matthews saves the Fed heavy-gunner by ramming a Charon assassin with a Ghost hover-cycle-- and then goes roaring off into the distance, yelling in helpless alarm. Seeing this, Simmons has this to say: |
| 1120 | -->'''Simmons:''' Yeah...maybe giving alien vehicles to human drivers ''wasn't'' such a good idea.\ |
| 1121 | '''Doc:''' ''(Roaring past on his own Ghost, firing the plasma cannons in full O'Malley persona)'' Speak for yourself! Mua-ha ha ha ha ha! |
| 1122 | * After being teleported to the control room and setting up the broadcast for the message, they discover that Locus and Felix aren't as dead as they'd thought. |
| 1123 | -->'''Simmons:''' ''(increasingly hysterical)'' I thought you said they were ''dead!''\ |
| 1124 | '''Epsilon:''' ''(actually hysterical)'' We dropped a ''fucking spaceship'' on them, '''''it was kind of assumed!!!''''' |
| 1125 | * Felix's fight with the Blood Gulch Crew combines awesome with hilarity: |
| 1126 | ** Felix runs to escape the Reds and Blues' ambush, only to be clotheslined by O'Malley, who taunts him before pointing a rocket launcher at him. Felix can only [[ThisIsGonnaSuck yelp in fear]] right before he's shot in the face. |
| 1127 | ---> '''Doc/O'Malley:''' ''(clotheslines Felix with his Rocket Launcher)'' Oh, please! I'm the ''original'' bad boy. [[EvilLaugh Muhehehe...]]\ |
| 1128 | '''Felix:''' ''(Whimpers)'' |
| 1129 | ** Felix gets a hold of Caboose's rifle -- which, in addition to [[CallBack being modified with auto-targeting, also shoots confetti whenever Caboose has the potential to team-kill someone]]-- and tries to execute Caboose with it. Guess what happens. Go on, guess. [[ChekhovsGun Freckles not only fires confetti into Caboose's face, but smacks Felix in the face by shooting into the air.]] |
| 1130 | --->'''Felix:''' [[VillainousBreakdown ...What is WRONG with you people?!]] |
| 1131 | ** [[invoked]] Really, [[FalseFriend after]] ''everything'' [[CardCarryingVillain Felix has done]], him receiving a CurbStompBattle and HumiliationConga from the same people he called losers and claimed needed Freelancers to stay alive is nothing short of both [[CatharsisFactor therapeutic]] and gut-bustingly hilarious. |
| 1132 | ** When Felix throws his Great Key at Tucker, [[HeelFaceTurn Locus]] and Caboose, the former two dive out of the way. Caboose, meanwhile, opts to just topple backwards instead. |
| 1133 | * Guess who's seen during Church's galaxy-wide transmission? [[TheBusCameBack Sister!]] And she's just as much of a perky LovableSexManiac as ever, if her [[ExtremeOmnisexual remarks about the last time she saw Lopez]] are anything to go by. And of course, she identifies him as the [[BrickJoke "grey guy".]] |
| 1134 | |
| 1135 | [[AC: Episode 20: The End]] |
| 1136 | * The entire Blood Gulch Crew trying to pack themselves into a single aircraft, with some of them literally hanging out the sides. |
| 1137 | -->'''Grif & Simmons:''' [[RunningGag Shotgun!]] |
| 1138 | * Caboose [[FauxHorrific exclaiming in horror]] at seeing Hargrove on the monitor. |
| 1139 | -->'''Caboose:''' He's so... ''bald!'' |
| 1140 | * Freckles being jealous of Caboose's joy with seeing F.I.L.S.S. again. |
| 1141 | * Sarge nonchalantly stepping on the remnants of Hargrove's coffee mug after Lopez and Donut tip over the desk and use it to barricade the door. |
| 1142 | -->'''Sarge:''' [[SarcasmMode Oops!]] |
| 1143 | * Tucker remarking that [[EleventhHourSuperpower the Meta's suit is]] "kind of [[GagPenis tight in the crotch."]] |
| 1144 | * [[invoked]] Crossing over with [[SugarWiki/HeartwarmingMoments heartwarming]], Epsilon-Church telling the rest of [[TrueCompanions the Blood Gulch Crew]] right before their LastStand against Charon that [[CallBack "Out of everyone I've ever met...]] I hate you all the least." |
| 1145 | * [[invoked]] This ''doozy'' of a BlackComedyBurst comment that [[WordOfGod Burnie Burns (Church's voice actor)]] saw after the finale, [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FI9R2-7FTNM and then remarked was his favorite comment related to the entire season:]] "[[HeroicSacrifice Well, Church died]] the way he lived - [[ItsAllAboutMe Calling himself a hero]]." |
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/context.php
FollowingContext Funny / RedVsBlueTheChorusTrilogy
Go To
- Show Spoilers
- Night Vision
- Sticky Header
- Wide Load
