Instead I'll just list off the places the author failed at.
Gardevoir is a Psychic type, not a Grass type.
The author seems to imply that Gardevoirs breed like humans. They don't. They're in the Indeterminate egg group (Or, for those of you without much knowledge about Pokemon, they breed with things like balls of gas or living stomachs).
Rape victims do not usually get that badly mentally damaged (I'm guessing, I don't know that much about Psychology).
Seriously? "Twisting her Cervix"?
The first rape only came about because David was horny, and there was no one but his Gardevoir around. The second rape came right the fuck out of nowhere. Considering the horniness of everyone in this fic, he shouldn't even need to rape someone to get laid.
This is all I can think of at the moment. On a side note, I'd like to see a re-imaging of this fic with Nurse Joy as Ellen from I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream and David as the man in the yellow jumpsuit. Have it take place in an elevator, even.
FanficRecs Too disgusting to review the plot
Instead I'll just list off the places the author failed at.
This is all I can think of at the moment. On a side note, I'd like to see a re-imaging of this fic with Nurse Joy as Ellen from I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream and David as the man in the yellow jumpsuit. Have it take place in an elevator, even.