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It's a nice concept in theory, the problem was execution. The story can't seem to decide whether it's a parody of the pilot or an actual Hero of Another Story. It starts out promising with a similar format of a Canterlot pony being summoned to Ponyville to play a part in a social event and meets her soon to be friends when she gets there. Princess Luna goes missing and the ponies decide to seek her out on a whim. This is where it gets a little shaky. The heroes meet a number of obstacles on their way to the Princess, but it seems a little hollow. Whereas Twilight felt her companions become her friends over the journey, Octavia never seems to appreciate the others anymore than when she first arrived in Ponyville.
The dramatic scene between Lyra and Octavia fits into what I would expect of another mane cast. It tells of Octavia's character and could've been used as a sign of relationship development amongst the listening friends. But Lyra shrugs it off and goes to sleep before Octavia even finishes thanking her for listening and Vinyl laughs off her story. The biggest disappointment for me was Luna and Celestia. Luna walling herself off and wanting to be alone just seems totally out-of-character for somepony who's been in complete seclusion for a thousand years. Celestia appears with no fan-fare, tells Luna off for shirking royal duty, teleports the heroes back to Ponyville, and basically peaces out.(Not to mention she leaves Bonbon, something Celestia would not do.) Octavia says she's going to stay in Ponyville with no explanation other than she's frustrated at the Music Committee. That's it. No lesson learned. No friendships formed. And Bonbon stranded halfway across Equestria. What could have happened was maybe Luna had the Committee send Octavia to Ponyville on purpose and the journey was supposed to bring the characters together like Luna's counterpart cast. Lastly, I like that the Doctor wasn't abused but now he seemed underused. The Doctor Who mythos could have tied in, as the threat they were sent to stop. Or maybe they went back in time and helped stop Discord in the first place by bringing the Elements to Luna and Celestia!
It's still a good read. Derpy and the Doctor are loads of laughs, and the lampshades are funny. Just go in with "parody" in mind.
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