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Reviews Film / Spider Man Far From Home

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10/17/2019 15:08:07 •••

Far from a good movie

Right off the bat there is a superb idea to use: The earth is without heroes, and for now one of the most known is Spider-Man, doing charity work and working alongside Stark Enterprises, he shines as a bastion of hope for an earth that was ravaged by the 'blip', but no one knows that inside the suit, lies a kid that feels the burden of the legacy of a genius, billionaire, playboy philanthropist and expectations of a whole planet. All while the legacy of said hero also spawned vengeful people that will target Spider-Man.

Sadly, the idea is badly used. Awfully, even.

Most, if not all of the gripes with this movie come with how basically, literally every single person was riddled with an idiot ball bigger than Mysterios's fishbowl helmet. You may argue about if the attempts at romance were good, dorky and cute or bad, forced and awkward. Or how Mysterio's role was misplaced or was a nice subversion (since everyone watching the movie knows Mysterio is a bad guy, some argue and I agree that everything boiled down to 'waiting till he reveals himself' instead of a more interesting approach of making him antagonistic from start, as a competition to spider-man, and then work their relationship before Spider discovers and reveals that Mysterio is a fraud). But one can't argue that the whole movie seemed to be made expecting every single person to do stupid mistakes. Kinda like Last Jedi, but that's another landmine that won't be poked with a stick. Before going into spoilers territory, everything in the movie would have work far better if it was toned back to new york instead of a global threat, it will be explained why.

Heavy Spoilers ahead.

Alright, why did Tony Stark place an entire deadly system on a set of glasses, as Honest Trailers stated, one of the most displaced items? It was simple for Tony to engineer a dna scan, or give peter access from his suit, or give him a small base to work from. Tony, the guy who has always a suit ready, and another suit in case of the first suit fails, the guy who had THREE a.i.s ready in case his first one (Jarvis) had a problem?

Nick Fury, yeah, he could send a doppelganger in his stead, except that the canonically most paranoid person on the planet would not in any circumstances stay still in a -global- threat. And yeah, amazingly, sending spider-man against titans, without alerting the armies and countries where the incidents happen in order to not endanger whole populaces, was a really bad idea? You don't have captain marvel? What about Winter Soldier? Falcon? Ant-Man? This is a Global Threat, I'm sure even Hawkeye would get out of retirement for that one.

How the hell Quentin Beck wasn't identified as soon as Peter ACTIVATED THE GLASSES IN FRONT OF HIM WHILE WEARING THEM? "You can erase someone from the internet!" let's just pretend this is true, which isn't, so this also includes the other workers? A pair of glasses, made by Tony Stark, that has control over ALL his security and power, wouldn't come with something to identify potentially perilous people? And the drones behind him?

But this isn't a problem of the story in its major points, it also affects the 'smaller' narrative as well. Why would a shield agent ask Peter to strip without locking the door? Or securing the perimeter? Just so his colleague could walk in an embarrassing situation in order to force an awkward conflict. Why rely on the spider senses? You have Iron Man technology! Make a sonar, and spider drones, emp grenades and more!

And how the hell Shield, of all things, allowed JJ to sereverly endanger the "Last" avenger by revealing his name, and didn't cut the program on the spot?

And everything could be made better, fitting perfectly, if they toned down from 'global threat' to 'local threat', which is where Fishbowl is meant to be: He'd be too small to appear on Shield's radar, allowing Nick Fury his rest and ignorance, he'd be able to get closer to JJ and work his own fame as a hero, defaming Spider in order to replace him. Make him talk with Spider and realize he is just a kid, but that allure of merchandising and allowing goons to escape with money from bank heists he 'foiled' was too sweet to pass by. Sometimes, you just need to keep things at home.

10/17/2019 00:00:00

Instead of a more interesting approach of making him antagonistic from start, as a competition to spider-man, and then work their relationship before Spider discovers and reveals that Mysterio is a fraud

No. Just... no. I fucking HATE that cliché, and would have hated the movie if they went that road.


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