Reviews Fanfic / Dragonsof Iceand Fire

good start, deteriorates

My biggest problem is that the author seems hell-bent on making the story as depressing as possible.

Admittedly it started off well. Despite the grimness of the story the characters were fairly competent, believable, and likable, and the writing style is excellent.

As the story went on the competent Jon and his allies start acting absolutely stupid for no reason. The 'twenty good men' trope is shoved in the reader's face when Ramsay Bolton and Roose Bolton effortlessly: poison Jon's dragon, land ships at White Harbor (which wasn't explained, the sigils implied they were southern vessels), ambush Jon's army, infiltrate his ranks, without anyone noticing.

Holes in the plot the size of asteroids pop up again and again around the time of the Battle In the Snows, or more accurately, after Jon reaches the Wall. He makes absolutely no proactive effort into attacking his enemies despite having an immeasurable amount of time to do so, and all the resources at hand.