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03/09/2019 16:13:40 •••

Assessment

White Sheep starts as a fun crackfic. Featuring Salem being the matron of the Arc family, with Jaune as the sheltered and idealistic son that wants to follow in his father's heroic footsteps, rather than the evil overlord (and grand baby maker) as Salem would prefer, and the various canon villains slotted into more comedic roles that portrays the world of RWBY in a much more ambiguous light than the canon Goodvs Evil.

Sadly it doesn't last.

About a quarter into the story White Sheep loses sight of it's comedic tone and unintentional Harem teasing antics for more serious relationship and plot themes. The attempt at humor is still there, but never regains it's original tone and suffers heavily in going back and forth from comedy to seriousness and back again.

Worse as Jaune's motivations constantly shift, with becoming a Huntsman being the driving force early in the story, till it's replaced by a desire to protect his friends from his own relations, and a vague ideal to bring peace to the world that doesn't become relevant till the last stretch of the story, and where the events of Vol 4-5 are driven by rescuing a damsel in distress only for the story to be dragged out by another damsel in distress immediately after.

The greatest flaws, however, are how several earlier story, characters, and joke threads are created and subsequently abandoned in the first half, the jokes that do linger are dragged out without the same circumstances giving them humor and have no pay off in the end, the early characters reader's invested in are Put On A Bus if they aren't featured in later canon Volumes, and the author eventually settled for a rehashing of RWBY's canon story up to Vol 5 with the latter half merely serving as a means for cheap criticism of canon's various plot points, rather than genuine comedy.

All in all White Sheep is a story that lost sight of what it was about early, never recovered, and dragged on longer than was justified. Easily one of the worst fics written by the author, it's highly recommended readers skip this one, as a single consistent read through is likely to invoke disappointment rather than humor.

03/09/2019 00:00:00

I personally feel that, even if this isn't saying much, White Sheep in it's current state is arguably at least a bit better than Forged Destiny in it's current state, because while the things you say might definitely be an issue (at least for you; I have different issues or might just have different tastes in humor), I tend to find that it's overall easier to enjoy White Sheep simply because White Sheep is overall better handled in terms of it's tone.

While obvious White Sheep is a Comedy primarily and Forged Destiny is intended to be an epic fantasy/adventure, Forged Destiny and White Sheep (at least for me) were fairly even in terms of their humor and overall handling of the tone of their respective stories. But whereas Forged Destiny kinda got stuck into a tailspin of constantly adding on excessive drama and almost seems determined to add soul-crushing bitter endings to each successive book post Book 3, White Sheep at the very least still had plenty of moments with levity and the ability to at least invoke some laughs here and there to keep things from getting too close to Darkness Induced Audience Apathy, even if there were definitely more moments when things got a bit dull.

Granted, I should note that I haven't read anywhere near the amount of Couer's stories as you apparently have (Professor Arc, White Sheep, One Good Deserves Another, and Forged Destiny), so maybe I'm just not as affected by the flaws or able to notice the consistent issues you've mentioned on the forums as easily. Also I do wonder how the story would have turned out if Couer had chosen to stick more to whatever his original plan was instead of using (without doing enough research apparently) RWBY's canon Volume 6.


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