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Having made a serious effort to read this, I\'m going to say that whatever characterization flaws might have been made regarding the cast (and they exist, don\'t get me wrong) the quality of the prose makes up for it. Seriously, five star work.
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Shame the author seems bound and determined to kill the flow of the story by throwing in all those freakin\' references to other works. Yeah, canon Nanoha is full of shout-outs, but they\'re subtle. The references are made in such a way that you won\'t even know a reference was made unless you already get the joke. The references in this fic are... less subtle, and all too often the author will actually stop to explain them. I finally just had to quit reading altogether when the villain started dancing around his room to a far-too-slightly reworded version of \'Still Alive\' sung by a computer named Gladdis in his company called Aperture Systems. I mean, \'\'Portal\'\' was a great game, a shout-out is all well and good, but that seriously borders on plagiarism.