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Nothing about the original example says what's funny about the scene, though.
It just comes off like nitpicking. Narm has to be "poor attempt at drama/pathos/seriousness is executed so badly it becomes funny." Not just "I think this is bad writing".
As is, it seems like a complaint about a very common device in TV-characters speaking aloud when, logically, they would just be thinking.
Edited by ArthurEldMaybe someone could settle this by editing it to say something like:
- Narm: Episode 3 begins with an unsettling scene of someone crawling into a young Theo's bed and snuggling up to her. She thinks it's Nellie, but when she turns, no one is there. The music goes eerie, and the camera creeps in to Theo... who then asks aloud, "Whose hand was I holding?". In the original novel, Eleanor was across the room from Theo at the time, so this line made more sense. But in the show, Theo asks this question to herself and no one else, as though the audience needed to be told why the scene was scary.

On the YMMV page
for The Haunting of Hill House, I added the following Narm example a while back:
alexrae250
later added a note to it:
Which seems like a justifying edit, IMO? But I don't want to commit an edit war by deleting this bit outright, so I wanted some thoughts.
Edited by iamconstantine