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jormis29
Since: Mar, 2012
KolBardstrom
Since: Dec, 2021

Searching for a funny detective series about an incompetent, alcoholic detective. Name might involve "Dick". Almost a parody of the noire genre. Mainly involved the detective screwing up traditional detective situations and having hilarious lines.
A few quotes, roughly:
Time passed like a glaucoma-ridden senior driving a big unfamiliar car in a strange part of town up a steep hill during a blizzard; which is to say, not all that quickly.
The thought of getting close to this dame was making me sweat harder than an obese geriatric in a jacuzzi- "What are you thinking about, Dick?" "Fat, naked old men. Sweaty ones." "..."
I need to check if this guy really was a priest. "Name an apostle." "...What?" "You heard me limp-dick, name an apostle." "Uh, Margaret. Margaret the apostle." "..." I made a mental note to only ask question I knew the answer to in future.
There was a whole episode where he picked a random name out of the phonebook and kept crank calling a guy, until he had a mental breakdown.
I don't know if this was on actual tv or just a series of youtube videos. I know I've found montages of "The best moments from [insert name of show here]" on Youtube before. Any help is greatly appreciated!
Edited by KolBardstrom