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We try to kill SCP-682

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Draxterrus An Eldritch Troper Relationship Status: Wishfully thinking
An Eldritch Troper
Jul 16th 2019 at 7:15:10 AM

Results:

Test 1: I refused to witness the incident, but SCP-682 returned very pissed and caused three containment breaches resulting in [REDACTED] casualties before re-containment. 682 was reported to have remarked that he hates memes.

Test 2: Every single countryball was killed, sans a SCP Foundationball which contained 682 by itself.

Test 3: SCP-682 drank it. Then it attacked the researchers, resulting in several casualties. 682 was dealt with and re-contained, and mushrooms were spotted growing over the corpses of those killed by 682, which were identified as a variety of species of poisonous mushrooms.

Test 4: 682 destroyed Bikini Bottom. Fortunately it did not become adapt to become more powerful.

My next proposal: Send in the Cybermen. Five million, if you prefer. Then send 682 to the Daleks.

Easy on the bumps and calls for attention, Head Honcho.

Humanity is defined by its absurdity, and I am no exception.
RJ-19-CLOVIS-93 from New Zealand
Jul 17th 2019 at 5:03:24 PM

Result: The Daleks and SCP-682 found they had a lot in common and decided to team up. The Cybermen tried to convert 682, but it was tool alien and assaulted them

Test: Ask SCP-662/Mr Deeds to research a way to permanently kill SCP-682 with minimal casualties

Representing New Zealand, TV Tropes addict
HeadHoncho The Boss
The Boss
Jul 18th 2019 at 2:40:15 PM

Result: SCP-662 successfully removed SCP-682 from the premises. Let us clone it for fun!

Test 1: Subject SCP-682 to an army of "barbarians" (Celtic, Germanic, Slavic, Turkic, and Iranian tribes), and the Roman Empire for fun, but by one tribe at a time.

Test 2: Subject SCP-682 to an army of Sonorosians.

Edited by HeadHoncho on Jul 18th 2019 at 11:40:42 AM

HeadHoncho The Boss
The Boss
Jul 20th 2019 at 6:23:02 PM

Hello, anybody there? Bump.

Edited by HeadHoncho on Jul 20th 2019 at 3:25:35 PM

Draxterrus An Eldritch Troper Relationship Status: Wishfully thinking
An Eldritch Troper
Jul 20th 2019 at 6:41:16 PM

Both tests ended with those opposing SCP-682 annihilated.

Next test: Fire the Omega Beams at SCP-682.

Humanity is defined by its absurdity, and I am no exception.
HeadHoncho The Boss
The Boss
Jul 29th 2019 at 4:46:51 PM

Result: Failure, SCP-682 survived that it is more upset than ever.

Test: Subject SCP-682, SCP-953, and SCP-1471 into the Toontown universe.

Edited by HeadHoncho on Jul 29th 2019 at 1:47:42 PM

TimeLordVictorious Never Ask Me For Anything Ever Again from Mallet Island Relationship Status: YOU'RE TEARING ME APART LISA
Never Ask Me For Anything Ever Again
Aug 23rd 2019 at 5:32:51 AM

Result: Cancelled. The servers were shut down back in September of 2013. Also, even if we did send them into Toontown, everyone playing it would become aware to the existence of those SCPs, or at least it would distract them from the game long enough to attract the attention of developers, which is unwanted.

Test: Trap it inside Calamity Ganon.

Edited by TimeLordVictorious on Aug 23rd 2019 at 5:33:03 AM

"Shout, shout, let it all out These are the things I can do without, come on I'm talking to you, come on!" -Tears For Fears
Sep 3rd 2019 at 11:09:57 AM

RESULTS: FAILURE.

“Looks like Hyrule has a new tyrant ruler.”

TEST: Pit SCP-682 against Lord Beerus and have The God of Destruction perform Hakai on that lizard.

Dino is the name, replying is my game! :D
RJ-19-CLOVIS-93 from New Zealand
Sep 3rd 2019 at 11:21:43 PM

Result: Failure. SCP-682 was Hakai'd to 90% of its mass, before it stopped. It did take longer to regenerate. The two fought and 682 soon stopped because a) he enjoyed the fight and b) 682 admires the petty destruction of Lord Beerus. Further analysis shows that as Hakai failed against Zamasu, who had Super Dragonball-induced Complete Immortality, survived the Hakai, it's not too surprising that 682 would. We at least know the minimum level of 682's immortality is "Super Dragonball level"

Test: Point out that if SCP-682 succeeds at killing all life it finds offensive to it, it will be bored out of its skull with nothing to kill and virtually no-one to interact. We could get a compromise of "682 will let our numbers grow if it causes an apocalypse" as a worst case scenario(and we secretly improve our craft each cycle)

Representing New Zealand, TV Tropes addict
Draxterrus An Eldritch Troper Relationship Status: Wishfully thinking
An Eldritch Troper
Sep 4th 2019 at 12:37:59 AM

Result: SCP-682 said it doesn't care, but it also doesn't intend to kill anything now.

Test: Send SCP-682 to its progenitor, The Scarlet King.

Humanity is defined by its absurdity, and I am no exception.
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