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MarqFJA The Cosmopolitan Fictioneer from Deserts of the Middle East (Before Recorded History) Relationship Status: Anime is my true love
The Cosmopolitan Fictioneer
#12226: Aug 10th 2011 at 4:01:55 PM

Alright, I think this is the final version. As always, any constructive critique - be it small or large - is very welcome and much appreciated.

PS: Would it could fit in SCM's Tales of Yue's Harem or Overmaster's More than Fifty Four Negi and Chisame Threesomes?

In the Blood, Part 1

Since Negi looked nigh-identical to his father, had eventually grown to be as ridiculously overpowered as he was, and his first great adventure had so many "Generation Xerox" moments (as Chisame had called it) that it might as well have been a "cookie-cutter copy-paste" of Nagi's own exploits during Ala Rubra's long fight against Kosmou Entelekeia, the girls of Ala Alba (Kotaro couldn't care less) always wondered what exactly had he inherited from his mother besides inherent politeness, intellectuality, emotional awkwardness, and general obliviousness to romantic love directed at oneself.

One morning, while spending the weekend at a beach resort, they had their first clue when they found Arika and Negi sleeping on a convenient couch halfway between their rooms, embracing each other. For Asuna, Anya and (to a lesser degree) Chisame, the inherent cuteness of the scene was ruined by the following facts:

  1. Both mother and son's clothes were scandalously dishelved - were those prints on Arika's panties of Nagi's face or Negi's? Or both? More than a few of the girls had independently decided to not think too hard about it, for their respective sanity's sake
  2. Negi's head (Not that head!) was deep into his mother's bosomy marshmallow heaven, loosely held in place by one of Arika's hands.
  3. The placement of their... lower bodies was so absolutely in violation of SFW and Family Friendly standards that, to avoid possible lawsuits, the author will resort to this following summary from Her Cyberspatial Majesty and Net Idolness Chiu-sama: "Chapter 283, page 9, second to last panel, only Arika's legs go around instead of one acting as a support. That is all."

It did not help that Nagi was clearly holding back roaring laughter lest he wakes the still sleeping pair up, as Kazumi quickly and expertly snapped photos "for posterity", while Haruna was sketching down the image with mad speed while dodging several attempts to stop her by most of the other girls. Misa and Ayaka? They were each deep in thought on how to arrange for the scene before them to be reenacted... With themselves in Arika's place. And of course, Anya had attempted to extract Negi off his mother. She managed to lift up his body about 40 centimeters away from Arika's before he started sleep-whimpering in protest.... prompting a split-second response from the still-sleeping Arika to the offender.

In spite of a soft "Grrrr..." leaving Arika's lips, Anya never saw the brutal punch to the groin coming; it was a miracle that she managed to hold back her scream of pain, given the attack's utter suddenness. Her brain, however, was now suffering from a mental traffic jam between the overload of pain signals and its own attempts to send commands to the rest of the body, and thus unfortunately she did not do the smart thing and let go of Negi for the next four seconds (during which the onlookers were "busy" being stiff as statues in a mix of awe, fear and pained sympathy).

Those four seconds were too long for the still-sleeping Arika's patience, and thus she suddenly twisted her hand around, grabbed a firm fistful of Anya's Bleep, and Pulled. Hard. The newly-introduced agony had flooded poor Anya's mind to the limit, locking her body up even further; it was only when Asuna and Chisame's cries for her to "Let him go already!" finally penetrated the dense sea of abject pain that filled her consciousness that she managed to will her hands to do just that. When Arika's death grip finally released after Negi fell back onto her, the redheaded girl dropped from the couch and to the floor like a sack of potatoes, clutching at her site of injury while a seemingly-unending torrent of tears streamed out of her eyes. She then and there swore to never do anything that might upset Arika, even while asleep.

Meanwhile, Negi, oblivious to all the happenings around him, only shifted a little to return to the comfort of his prior position, the only sound coming from him as a soft-spoken "Marshmallows..." after his head found its original resting place. Arika, in response, tightened her hold on her sleeping son, a small smile of pure contentment gracing her face, matching her son's own.

edited 10th Aug '11 4:06:55 PM by MarqFJA

Fiat iustitia, et pereat mundus.
SCMof2814 Since: Nov, 2010 Relationship Status: I don't mind being locked in this eternal maze!
#12227: Aug 10th 2011 at 5:17:22 PM

[up]Not in harem, sorry. How about in "Everything is Permitted".

My bid for epilogue. It's narrated by 2814!Chao…

From the Files of Chao Lingshen, Temporal Renegade: Class-H Prime Multiverse External Universe 6904877

This universe first came to my attention when a learned, hot, distinguished, intellectual, erudite, accomplished but modest colleague of mine of an unequally rational and emotional nature happened to lose one of her classmates in it. The classmate in question is still recovering from the trauma. 

I have since observed the universe personally and— after frantically going through my own genetic code, hi-jacking the Time Gates during one of the periods its guardian was had still not dealt with the fact Pluto was no longer a planet to check on our Arika and confirm that nothing like this had happened to her and that her father was definitely dead, in a bout of paranoia— have noted several points of interest. The outsider sees most of the game as they say, and my particular lifestyle and experience have allowed me to identify several persons of interest. I humbly submit my own research on the matter to my other learned, hot, distinguished, intellectual, erudite, accomplished but modest colleague. 

Kotomine Kirei (I will not bother you with why I singled out the man) and his colleague Gendo, in the wake of the harsher scrutiny after Takahata Takamichi's dismissal, were soon fired, defrocked and excommunicated. This did not seem to bother Kotomine all that much. In his memoirs (which was banned in most countries with a large Christian population and used as a training manual by many terrorist cells), he stated that one's relationship with God was a personal matter, and one did not have to be one of God's chosen to be one of His children. 

He left Mahora for Africa to perform missionary work. The distance gave him new anonymity, and he soon established himself as a charismatic cult leader. Such cults rarely end well. 

A hit was eventually placed on him, the contract fulfilled by Tatsumiya in 2014 after numerous failures by lesser men. Apparently he kept on wearing his Kevlar vestments. 

His young colleague, father Gendo, also left Mahora. He remained convinced of his radical interpretation of the Dead Sea Scrolls, attaining doctorates in several disciplines and spent much time lobbying for funding. He was eventually hired by Lex Corp, that hive of scum and villianny, where he is positively identified as the cause of at least three possible "end of the world" incidents. At each instance, he was awarded Employee of the Year. 

Nun-in-training Caren Ortensia moved on to be a real nun and a full member of her order. She went in to have a highly successful but scandalous career as an exorcist. Much of the scandal rises from her choice of Ministra, one Mido Miko of the Miroku clan in ninja. 

Ikari Yui left the order when she found out she was pregnant with twins nine months after the incident in Mahora. Her family were of little help, and she was forced to raise the children alone. Though she tried her best, the pressure soon became too much for her, and she committed suicide. Her children where shunted along the foster system. They were eventually claimed by their father. Due to his being housed in Lex Corp housing, direct observation was not prudent, but there are indications they were experimented upon, and were involved in a bizarre incident described by many as a black hole. 

The Specialized Extracurricular Execution Squad continued to act as one of Mahora's student-protector groups. The group disbanded suddenly a year later upon the mysterious disappearance of one of their members. Investigations have been fruitless, even for me, though there is evidence of some form of "Stopped Time" phenomenon. 

Rossette Christopher, her boyfriend Chrono and her Ministra Azmaria soon left Mahora to search for her missing brother. Sightings of her dot the world, but her trail ends in the demon realm. Her fate is unknown, but a boy claiming to be her brother arrived at Mahora, his memory blank except for his name, a description of his sister, and the knowledge that sister Shakti was still owed by Rosette for totalling her car. He went on to train as a priest, reversing circumstance as he eventually wandered the world searching for her. 

Tohsaka Rin and Sakura (no relation to the one who would one day call himself the Lord of War) graduated from Mahora and moved on to become mages, continuing to maintain a physical relationship. Medical records state that Sakura was born with Degradative Mana Syndrome, a condition where the subject, apparently, cannot naturally metabolize raw environmental mana, and need regular transfusions of already biologically processed magic to survive. I am unable to ascertain if this is the factual truth or an excuse to justify their behavior. With Rin, anything is possible. 

They never participated in a Holy Grail War. They never met Emiya Shiro. 

File End. Audacia Paula.

Yes, Yui's kids are Shinji and Rei. Yes, they did THAT.

edited 10th Aug '11 5:23:47 PM by SCMof2814

Darkenning She's Back Since: Apr, 2011
She's Back
#12228: Aug 10th 2011 at 5:28:23 PM

[up] I can see some places that need cleaning up, but it's overall satisfactory.

If you won't I'll slit your throat/Won't you please be nice?
JapaneseTeeth Existence Weighed Against Nonbeing from Meinong's jungle Since: Jan, 2001 Relationship Status: Mu
Existence Weighed Against Nonbeing
#12229: Aug 10th 2011 at 6:05:10 PM

Here's a slightly updated version of chapter 14, with a little bit more on the end, and the scene breaks more clear. I'm still trying to figure out the best way to segue from the conversation into Asuma getting kicked out of the house. I know what I'm doing after that, but I'm having trouble getting to that point. I feel like there needs to be a larger slight that triggers it, but on the other hand, it's within Asuma and Hayate's characters to get really worked up over a minor insult, so I'm torn.

Thoughts?

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NoLimit Since: Oct, 2009
#12230: Aug 10th 2011 at 6:07:54 PM

If you want to stay true to what happened to the manga, I think just a minor issue would be best. If you're going a different direction, go big. tongue

JapaneseTeeth Existence Weighed Against Nonbeing from Meinong's jungle Since: Jan, 2001 Relationship Status: Mu
Existence Weighed Against Nonbeing
#12231: Aug 10th 2011 at 6:18:59 PM

It's actually not an enormous departure. The basic information is the same, it's just that Nelly is getting Hayate's backstory from a different source, and I'm adding quite a bit of background for Asuma as well.

As a whole this chapter is largely the same material, just with the focus shifted from Hayate to Asuma a bit. The plan is to sort of get into the dynamics between Asuma and the rest of the class.

It's just that I'm trying to keep the story flowing smoothly and not break readers out of the story with "Hayate kicked him out because of that?" Does the current direction of the scene work, or should I have one of them make a more blatant insult?

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NoLimit Since: Oct, 2009
#12232: Aug 10th 2011 at 6:23:06 PM

I suppose go for the bigger insult, then.

JapaneseTeeth Existence Weighed Against Nonbeing from Meinong's jungle Since: Jan, 2001 Relationship Status: Mu
Existence Weighed Against Nonbeing
#12233: Aug 10th 2011 at 6:28:55 PM

Ugh, I don't know what to use, though. Maybe I could just have Asuma accuse Hayate of trying to seduce Nelly or something. Actually, yeah. That fits into the rest of the chapter pretty well...

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MarqFJA The Cosmopolitan Fictioneer from Deserts of the Middle East (Before Recorded History) Relationship Status: Anime is my true love
The Cosmopolitan Fictioneer
#12234: Aug 10th 2011 at 6:31:21 PM

@SCM: I suppose Everything is Permitted works too. Just for future reference, what are the minimum criteria for applying a given ficlet to Tales of Yue's Harem? Unless my memory is wrong, I think there were a couple of shorts in that series that were originally posted by other tropers here.

Fiat iustitia, et pereat mundus.
Anemoi Snow Queen and Proctologist from Arendelle Proctology Since: Jan, 2011 Relationship Status: Wanna dance with somebody
Snow Queen and Proctologist
#12235: Aug 10th 2011 at 6:52:52 PM

Shhh....

Lets all wait quietly while Mage works his magic

You know you want to add love
SCMof2814 Since: Nov, 2010 Relationship Status: I don't mind being locked in this eternal maze!
#12236: Aug 10th 2011 at 7:20:09 PM

[up]I can confidently say you need Immortality for that. Immortality and the patience of a Hellsing fan.

[up][up]That was in CRACK Dating Service. Yue's harem is all me.

edited 10th Aug '11 7:24:53 PM by SCMof2814

MarqFJA The Cosmopolitan Fictioneer from Deserts of the Middle East (Before Recorded History) Relationship Status: Anime is my true love
The Cosmopolitan Fictioneer
#12237: Aug 10th 2011 at 7:34:20 PM

@SCM: Whoops. My mistake. ^_^;

Speaking of which.... I had asked a question a long while ago when you posted some of ToYH Chapter 9's ficlets here: Why "logistics director"?

edited 10th Aug '11 7:36:20 PM by MarqFJA

Fiat iustitia, et pereat mundus.
SCMof2814 Since: Nov, 2010 Relationship Status: I don't mind being locked in this eternal maze!
#12238: Aug 10th 2011 at 7:39:49 PM

It means she's in charge SHIPPING.

NapoleonDeCheese Since: Oct, 2010
#12239: Aug 10th 2011 at 8:06:14 PM

Okay, my version of the epilogue.

My name is Itoshiki Nozomu. And I suppose some would call me a fortunate man.

I have led a long, long life, with no signs of ending anytime soon. My physicians have determined that, despite my old age and my rather sorry physical state, my life signs show no signal of any degradation threatening of my continued existence. I have married twice, both times to beautiful younger women, and I have four intelligent, cultured and well respected children.

In truth, nothing is ever as simple. My life has been prolonged by an immortality curse set upon me since childhood. My wives were both former students of mine, and neither marriage has been exactly perfect (but then again, no marriage ever is). Only one of my children even speaks to me anymore.

And yet, I cannot feel as much despair as I used to. Not anymore. Even my emotions have withered down with old age. Now, I barely can muster more than a perennial gray melancholy. I cannot attempt suicide as often nowadays, being unable to climb up a tree to set a proper rope, or to hold a gun to my temple without my hands trembling far too much. And my wife frustrates most of my attempts anyway.

Just like she did the first time we ever met, at Sakura Lane. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

Through her experiences compiling information for this report of the incidents involving the last few weeks Class 3-A spent fully together, minus herself, of course, Chao Lingshen-san approached me for help, claiming being too wrapped into other, shady businesses of her own to be able to handle all of the research. I am convinced she mostly did it out of pity for this poor old man, to make me feel useful again, but I humored her.

So, after she has exposed the eventual happenings going through the lives of her classmates after that fatidic day, I will chronicle what happened to the rest of the players mentioned through this dark drama.

Konoe Konoemon barely survived a few years more, dying roughly a year after Eishun's second marriage. The autopsies never could determine exactly what caused his demise, being so sudden and seemingly abrupt, but I suspect we all should have seen the signs coming up. The events of the Alladia fiasco, plus the Hi ME Festival the year after, took a heavy toll on him, not a physical one, but a much worse one. To this day, I'm convinced the poor man died of a broken heart.

Eishun himself reached a rather old age, dying of natural causes one afternoon in his garden. His wife found the body near the koi pond. She quite never recovered, spending her last years in a retirement home, although surrounded by old friends from her time at some Inn she used to live at.

I haven't been authorized by Asuna Hime-sama to reveal any info on the last few years of Takahata Takamichi.

Jack Rakan is, and I'm sure this should come as no surprise to you, still alive, of course. He's pretty much as healthy and vigorous as he was back then; I met him again last year, and when I asked him, astonished, how did he do it, he only laughed and told me "Even old age fears Rakan!" I have to agree. From some hints he dropped in our conversation, he still stays in semi-frequent contact with Tatsumiya-san, wherever she is now.

Fate Averruncus, formerly known as Tertium, lives on as well. Through the great war against the Gorean Lord, his 'sibling unit' Quartum sided with the Lord of War, becoming his main enforcer, and choosing to use his newfound free will to unleash his worst desires, slaying and destroying at his pleasure. However, Fate-san and his two remaining siblings stood against him, being a key part on the defeat of the Gorean forces. Fate-san destroyed Quartum-san with his own hands, a fact he has never wanted to comment on ever since.

However, this defense of the Mundus Magicus population moved the masses, especially the younger ones, to acclaim the three last Averrunci as heroes, finally giving them acceptance from the same society they once had opposed. Though none of them was interested on fame and riches, they have used their influence to work for Mundus Magicus' well-being, staying together all to this day. I met them earlier this year, when I took my wife for her first trip to Mundus Magicus. I had a brief interview with Fate-san, where he revealed he had, indeed, met Negi-sensei twice or thrice since Mahora's near-destruction. He didn't have much to say on the matter, but Sextum-san, smiling, commented he had been actually happy when he sparred with Negi-sensei again. His expression unchanged, Fate-san denied it.

The Averrunci have been rejoined by Fate-san's old partner Tamaki, who, due to the long lifespans of her race, seems to have been left just as young as they look. They refused to comment on the status of Fate-san's other Ministra, although I know for a fact Shiori-san and Homura-san, at least, died long ago.

Dynamis-san remains a prisoner under custody of the new Megalomesembrian Senate, and has written several books during his long prison stay, all of them heavily censored by the authorities due to 'spreading dangerous ideas to the inhabitants of the whole world'. The rumors about him managing to direct several terrorist cells carrying on the ideals of Cosmo Entelecheia even from his imprisonment have not been confirmed at any point.

Anya Cocolova never married, although she had several middle term relationships with other females. She became an expert combat mage, and even managed to research on and re-discover the long forgotten legendary spell known as the Drag Slave. However, she died bravely in battle against a demon lord around the Gotham area when she was 43. Reportedly, her last word in her agony was "Negi."

Lex Corp remained under intense observation by the magical community for the next few years. Its involvement with Alladia's schemes was well proved and known, by supplying the mad renegade with men, weaponry and resources. But in turn, Alladia had leaked secrets and resources of his own to Lex Corp. Some of them apparently included information on several highly touching and delicate subjects our higher-ups would prefer to keep hidden at any and all costs.

So, eventually, the whole thing was simply swept under the rug. Lex Corp president Lex Luthor would later run for an unsuccesful bid for the presidency of the United States, and a decade after that failed, he was reported dead in a private plane crash. They never found the body.

Shortly after, a Lex Luthor the Second, apparently a son of his, reclaimed the company for himself, and he continues running it even today. As he grows old and identical to his 'father', I know Alladia's legacy, in a way, lives on. It will as long as evil men with the means to perpetuate themselves cheating on death exist. If I were a believing man, I would pray for our future.

Hasegawa Sora, mother of Hasegawa Chisame, reportedly had, according to sources I'll keep hidden, a few sexual encounters of her own with the son of the man she had loved, often in company of her daughter. I will issue no judgements on the matter and simply comment they did a good job raising the young boy born in the middle of that unusual family unit.

Sora-san died at her 68 years of life, as an executive for the Fujimi, Morisato and Hasegawa company sponsoring car races all across the world. While researching for this writing, I visited her old home, now owned by a young woman named Skuld, seemingly a foreigner. Skuld-san owned several pieces of strange techonology, many of them of her own design, but some with an unmistakable similarity to the designs of the supposedly late Hakase Satomi. While questioning her on the matter, Skuld-san smiled. She told me she could fill in the blanks of the stories of the classmates Chao-san had lost track of. She gave me that information, and while some of their cases did, indeed, paint better futures for them than I'd have expected, others were bleak enough to make me wish I'd never heard about them.

From what Skuld-san told me, she also was partially involved in the complex transfering Chisame-san's consciousness to what she called 'The Yggdrasil Code running through the Maginet, the Internet, and Different Frequencies you aren't even Aware of yet', but the explanation was so frankly complicated, I didn't understand a single thing.

Later, when I reported this to Chao-san, she doubted before telling me she didn't want to hear the untold stories. I actually breathed with relief. Some of those stories were nearly impossible for me to repeat, and some others were too optimistic for a sad old man like me to express them properly.

As for my Ministra, they all took separate paths after graduation. Kitsu Chiri-san, against all my expectations, rose above her mania and became the most beloved Prime Minister Japan has ever had. When she died in 2077, the whole country cried.

Kimura Kaere-san went off to study law at the Harvey Dent Legal School in Gotham, and enjoyed a highly succesful career for a while until she was shot dead before her home in 2029 by members of the Joker Gang.

Tsunetsuki Matoi-san grew disillusioned with me and married one of her old flames, one of the members of that ridiculous Ala Iridia club. I can't remember his name, but I seem to remember his nickname went... Shadow Crystal something... but it doesn't matter. I think they are still alive, and I also believe they had at least four children.

Otonashi Meru-san struggled past her vocal limitations to no avail. Forced by her controlling father into a loveless marriage, she eventually locked herself in her bathroom, sent a text message to the ploce, and sliced her wrists. She was 24 then.

Kobushi Abiru-san was mauled by the last wild tiger alive in 2043. The tiger was then shot.

Kaga Ai-san married a boy who had a crush on her all through high school, Kuniya Kino-kun. They married and had three daughters and five sons, since she never could tell 'no' to him. I stopped receiving apology letters about everything she supposedly did to us during school three years ago, so I suppose she has died as well.

Hito Nami led a perfectly normal life, married a partner at her office job, had one son and a daughter, and died at the age 70.

My sister, Itoshiki Rin, is still alive, and never married, although she still managed to give birth to a boy suspiciously similar to pretty much every male in the Itoshiki family. Before you accuse me of such a vile crime, I'd like to repeat I never fell into those abominable actions with her, and even if I had, I stopped doing it five years before my nephew was born.

My other, older nephew Majiru, however, has lived with Rin and Kojiro-kun ever since.

I married Fujiyoshi Harumi in the spring of 2013, and soon we had our first and only son, Saburo, the only child of mine who remains in contact with me. Harumi reached extremely high pinnacles of fame as Japan's most controverted erotic manga artist, continuing all the way her frequent, bitter clashes with Saotome Haruna, and causing many an Internet flame war. However, when Saotome-san died, she was the person who cried the most in the funeral.

We divorced after six years of marriage; we loved each other too much, simply too much to continue making each other miserable. We continued being good friends, and she was the one who pushed me and Kafuka-san back together.

So yes, I married Kafuka-san after that, and so we close this additional epilogue to the saga of our lives. When Harumi died at her 63 in a car crash, I cried, actually cried, like never before. And Kafuka cried too. It was the first time I ever saw her crying, she, who always had been so perfectly happy. We cried together, and then, in our mutual sadness, I felt complemented like never before.

I don't want to say I'm happy, because I'm afraid I'd lose my happiness right after saying it. Kafuka has caused me more problems than one person should ever cause any other, and she knows it. And yet, the only moments of something else than sadness and melancholy I ever have anymore are those when I'm looking into her eyes.

I suppose that's enough to make me, all in all, a fortunate man.

- Itoshiki Nozomu, Headmaster of Mahora Academy.

edited 10th Aug '11 8:15:40 PM by NapoleonDeCheese

MarqFJA The Cosmopolitan Fictioneer from Deserts of the Middle East (Before Recorded History) Relationship Status: Anime is my true love
The Cosmopolitan Fictioneer
#12240: Aug 10th 2011 at 8:17:00 PM

@SCM: So, your Yue's in charge of all Shipping for her Negimaverse?

Fiat iustitia, et pereat mundus.
Immi Since: May, 2009 Relationship Status: I know
#12241: Aug 10th 2011 at 8:27:31 PM

Anyone have advice on writing sword fights?

PM box is always open.
Darkenning She's Back Since: Apr, 2011
She's Back
#12242: Aug 10th 2011 at 8:33:06 PM

@OM: Very nice! Just need your co-author's note, and then we're ready to put this thing to bed.

@SCM: If you have any authorial thoughts you'd like to include, you're certainly welcome to do so as well.

edited 10th Aug '11 8:39:40 PM by Darkenning

If you won't I'll slit your throat/Won't you please be nice?
NapoleonDeCheese Since: Oct, 2010
#12243: Aug 10th 2011 at 8:41:48 PM

[up] I'm starting the essay now. It's a long one, so I'm not fully sure I'll have it ready before it's time to hit the sack. But it'll be done for tomorrow at most.

Darkenning She's Back Since: Apr, 2011
She's Back
#12244: Aug 10th 2011 at 8:49:53 PM

[up][up][up] Go read Dumas and Sabatini. Arturo Perez-Reverte wrote a brilliant novel entitled The Fencing Master which will also be helpful, even though (I believe) its one swordfight is extremely attenuated. If you can find translations of Wuxia novels in your native language, that will also help.

If you won't I'll slit your throat/Won't you please be nice?
SCMof2814 Since: Nov, 2010 Relationship Status: I don't mind being locked in this eternal maze!
#12245: Aug 10th 2011 at 8:56:42 PM

Nothing to note down for me, except the dismal lack of reviews.

NapoleonDeCheese Since: Oct, 2010
#12246: Aug 10th 2011 at 8:59:30 PM

[up] People is afraid to post reviews for a lemon of such a... controversial nature, I think. Some people who contacted me via P Ms hinted at it subtly or not-so-subtly.

SCMof2814 Since: Nov, 2010 Relationship Status: I don't mind being locked in this eternal maze!
#12247: Aug 10th 2011 at 9:04:17 PM

BTW, thanks for Matoi's future. waii

Oh, wait, I DO have a note! I wanted to add in something about how the Miroku Ninja clad are descended from Miroku and Sango's grandson and Kotaro and Natsumi's daughter, but I couldn't fit it in.

edited 10th Aug '11 9:14:51 PM by SCMof2814

Sereg Since: Jun, 2010
#12248: Aug 10th 2011 at 9:11:17 PM

[up][up]Absolutely true.

@Marq: Good. It’s a big improvement. Also, I’d never heard of the trope that Anya was potholed to. Also, the knee is less awkward, but you got the hand to work well.

@Darkenning: I agree with Napoleon. That was pretty cute. Also, I’ll start the analysis once I’ve reminded myself of exactly who is who’s child.

@Watchtower, I usually decide my chapter titles well into or even after writing the chapter.

@Napoleon: Nice.

Anya continued training under Ku Fei for the rest of the week, even undergoing some of her more eccentric regimes. Makie joined her for moral support, practicing for her competition and the librarians decided to make that week a self-study week, except of course, for Konoka who joined Asuna in training under the guidance of Setsuna. Soon, however, the time for the test arrived. “Hey, Master! I can’t see the match from here!” Chachazero complained from the floor. “Put me down in a better spot!”

“You’re pretty noisy for someone who’s completely useless!” Eva glared.

“It’s all Masters fault!” Chachazero complained. “It’s not my fault that I can’t move.”

“I’m here!” called Anya as Eva repositioned her doll.

“You came after all, girl. Well then, lets hurry up and get this started.” Eva smirked. “We’ll see just how long you can last against Chachamaru.”

“That was the idea.” Anya agreed.

“And why did you have to bring an audience?” asked Eva gesturing towards Setsuna, The Baka Rangers and The Library Exploration Club.

“They wanted to come.” Anya shrugged. “I’m ready.” She got into a stance as the audience cheered in support.

“I will be your opponent.” Chachamaru said as she took off her skirt, revealing the shorts she wore underneath.

“You may begin!” Eva declared, raising a hand. The two combatants charged forward.

“Please excuse me.” Chachamaru apologised as she pulled back a fist. Anya raised a hand to block, but was not fast enough, and she was punched in the face. She crumpled against the wall, but shiftily rose to her feet before charging into melee again. She swung her own fist forward, but Chachamaru simply dodged, grabbed her arm and swung her back into the wall even harder. Anya twitched as she tried to slowly get up, but Chachamaru simply walked over to her opponent and pinned her to the ground.

“That was pathetic.” Eva sighed. “You’re going to have to do a lot better than that. You’d probably die if you were trained by me directly! You’re not ready. Until you are, you’ll have to cope with me simply advising you and lending Chachamaru as a sparring partner. You can come to my cottage when you want to start.”

@SCM: I thought a bit about how a more warped version of myself would react to the events so far and quickly wrote something very rough this morning. It needs to be polished and may need to be heavily edited, split or whatever to fit, but it at least establishes my character and includes the obligatory Freudian imagery needed for the decadentverse. (Also, I hadn't decided who says what to give more options based on what's more appropriate.)

“Why did Ack Sed have to be taken from us?!” Itoshi cried. “I mean, I knew that it was just a matter of time before one of us was taken, considering the fact that we’re from the world of dark, but why did it have to be Ack Sed!? I deserved to die much more than he did!”

“Oh, here we go again...”

“Then I’d finally be able to make up for the fact that I never healed my mother!”

“You were thirteen when she died!”

“So? Springfield-sensei is younger than that!”

“Springfield-sensei is a genius! Compared to him, you’re a mentally retarded donkey!”

“I know! I’m a failure to my family! But wait!” he drew his pactio card. “Maybe I can die instead of Ack Sed!” SCM snatched the card out of his hand.

“I’m confiscating this until you calm down.” he said. “You know that any changes made by your artefact are temporary, so it wouldn’t save Ack Sed anyway!”

“Once again, my noble duty has been thwarted!” Itoshi complained to the Heavens.

“If you’re so eager to die, then why did you run from the psycho in the frilly dress?”

“I didn’t have anyone with me, so no one would have benefitted from my noble sacrifice. Besides, she had that look in her eyes when she saw me. Girls stab me when they get that look in their eyes! They’re scary! No offense.” He turned to the female members of their group. “In fact it’s a compliment. Your gender is very impressive!”

“If you don’t want to be stabbed, then why do you look longingly at knives, while caressing them and pressing them against your skin?”

“Well, if I did it myself, then I could choose the position an control the speed and depth of penetration, so it’s less scary. What?!” He looked around at his team members who were all face-palming.

Yes, I really was that oblivious when I was younger. Also, I would have had a massive crush on Chao, which I would have been in complete denial about.

edited 10th Aug '11 9:12:42 PM by Sereg

Darkenning She's Back Since: Apr, 2011
She's Back
#12249: Aug 10th 2011 at 9:12:18 PM

[up][up][up] Hell, one of the anonymous reviews actually said "This is a great story, but I don't want my name associated with it."

edited 10th Aug '11 9:13:08 PM by Darkenning

If you won't I'll slit your throat/Won't you please be nice?
NapoleonDeCheese Since: Oct, 2010
#12250: Aug 10th 2011 at 9:12:27 PM

[up][up][up] My pleasure. I'd like to imagine I went on to marry Suou Mikoto...

Darkenning, Shanejayell, since I know you both enjoy Mai Hime, I just wrote this...

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7274538/1/Thirty_One_Things_about_Shizuru_and_Natsuki

On the other hand, between this and the Decadent epilogue, I've been left with no time to post a second Unequally segment today. Sorry, I'll make up for it tomorrow!

edited 10th Aug '11 9:12:50 PM by NapoleonDeCheese


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