All Purpose Negima Fanfiction Thread

TWO: Do you wish to be referred to as your opposite gender for any reason?

"I'm sorry, Negi-sensei, but the Master won't be able to attend you tonight," Chachamaru informed, well planted at the cabin's doorstep. "She is in her... annual meeting with two old acquaitances..."

"Oh," Negi blinked. "That, that is okay, I guess. I always could ask her about this thing bothering me tomorrow..."

There was a low, deeply felt howl coming from inside the home. It sounded almost Kotaro-like. "What was that?"

"One of the Master's guests brought..." Chachamaru doubted for a moment, "... her pet."

In a way, it was true.

...

Rachel panted. "Oh, Mina, you truly have a wonderful familiar... NAGO! GII! Why can't you two be more like Akira-kun!-?"

The two of them cowered in a corner. "We're so deeply sorry...!"

Evangeline crossed her arms and hummed angrily. "Just wait until Chachamaru comes back... she'll surely outdo your stupid werewolf!"

Mina chuckled, running her fingers through Eva's hair. "I doubt she'll be able to compete with him in a few key areas..."

Evangeline smirked diabolically. "Oh? Never understimate the power of Hakase's special attachments..."

...

"I really must be going right now, Negi-sensei, Asuna-san. So sorry."

Negi blinked as Asuna did a shocked double take. "S-She almost slammed the door right on our noses! What the hell—" the redhaired girl babbled.

He scratched his head. "I'm sure it must be a highly, highly important meeting. Like that time last month with the Akashiya and Marker clans..."

Later that night, in the village elders' house...

"Okay then: we're all in agreement," Rakan nodded, clapping his hands. "Anyone have anything to add?"

Orihime raised her hand.

"Yes?"

"What about the delivery time? It's a ways to go to the target," she said, hand cupping her chin thoughtfully.

Ichigo piped up. "Yeah, but we have a contact that can give us a shortcut to here. All we need to do is figure out a way to get word to him without Soul Society finding out."

"Good point. And for that, we need to capture a Hell Butterfly." Rakan turned his head to the elder, who sat next to him. "Old man... You said the Shinigami go out on capture raaids every so often for more Hell Butterflies, right?"

The village elder nodded, and Ichigo thumped a fist into his palm. "So all we need to do is find one of the patrols and ambush them on the way back! Orihime, can you capture one Hell Butterfly by getting the little fairies to do it for you?"

"I think I can," Orihime said while putting a hand on the hairpin that housed them. "Lily's been a bit down lately, but I'm pretty sure we can get them help out there."

"Good," Rakan said, rubbing his hands and wearing a schemer's smile.

Uryu chose that moment to cut in from the other side of the room. "Hey, how's the pizza delivery going, guys?"

"Almost there," Rakan replied cheerily, giving a thumbs-up.

Uryu nodded cautiously and turned back to the other two sitting near him. "I don't think they've figured it out yet."

Something appeared to be bugging Chad. "...Yoruichi-san, is it really all right for us to be decieving them like this?"

"Anything that keeps him away from my slowly eroding remnants of sanity is perfectly in order, up to and including homicide."

The two more-or-less smartest members of the group exchanged looks and edged away from the disgruntled sentient cat ever so slightly.

Yoruichi shook her head. "...It's late, I'm tired, and he exists. Let's get back on track for canon. I'm in this bloody arc for the long run, and no stupid crossover is going to make me lose my grip on sanity until I've done my job and can fade slowly into obscurity, where he won't be."

The two more-or-less smartest members of the group exchanged looks again and edged away from the disgruntled sentient cat a tiny bit further.

"Right then. Now, we can't use the same gate as before, since that one's likely under guard by people who we can't beat and who the aberration can't outsmart," Yoruichi muttered, speaking out loud for their benefit. "And the other gates are ten days' trek away, so we'd run the cnance of taking too long..."

Chad frowned again, leaning forward. "But how do we get inside the city without using a gate?"

"Elder-dono," Yoruichi spoke out loud, staring intently at the floor as the village elder started. "Is Shiba Kuukaku around here? Her house was here in the past, but that was a while back..."

Uryu tilted his head. "Oh, do people often move house in Soul Society?"

Yoruichi blinked at him as if he had just said something stupid. "Hell no. Her house has legs to do the moving for her."

The two more-or-less smartest members of the group exchanged looks once more and edged away from the disgruntled sentient cat by another few millimetres.

"...You do realise I can see you, right?"

“I see them!” she announced as she placed Sayo’s card into her pocket. “Sayo-chan? May I borrow your pen?”

“Sure!” the ghost replied. “Adeat!” The doll transformed into a miniature version of her usual pactio outfit, but her artifact remained the same size. She handed the massive (to her) pen over to her friend who drew three crosses onto the gate.

“These are where the runes are hidden.” Kazumi informed them, before taking a step back.

“Shinmeiryu secret technique...” Setsuna cried as she drew her sword. “Zanganken!” She swung Yuunagi, slashing through one of the runes.

“Well done, Sakurazaki-san.” Yue said as she pointed her wand towards the top rune. “I’ll take care of the one at the top while you do the last one. Fo zo crattica Socratica! Gather to me, one spirit of ice! And strike my enemy! Sagitta magica una graoalis!” An ice arrow smashed into the rune, destroying it.

“Zanganken!” Setsuna yelled as she ripped her sword through the last rune.

“We’re out!” Asuna cheered.

“According to what I learned from Kotaro-kun, they weren’t able to guard the next entrance.” Yue informed them.

“Then let’s go!” Anya said as she threw a hand forward.

“All right.” Nodoka smiled. “Abeat.” Kotaro was once more free, but in no condition to stop them.

"Well, Negi-san... I honestly don't know what to say," he began. Behind Negi, Ayaka, Asuna and Chisame waited in an uncomfortable silence, covering themselves with bedsheets up to their necks. "I mean, I can't say I think this is a good idea... You're far too young, and this kind of thing demands for maturity and responsibility, although I'm sure you're much more mature and responsible than I was at your age... But... Honestly, I don't think I'm in too much of a position to judge you..."

"Ah?" Chisame blinked.

From where she stood next to Tenchi, Ayeka lifted a hand reluctantly. "I... I am Tenchi-sama's great-aunt..."

"Ah?" Ayaka took her turn.

"And Airi-san is his grandmother..." the purple haired woman continued.

"The woman who greeted him with a kiss in the mouth?" Asuna gawked.

"She looks remarkably young for her age, although after Eva-san, it shouldn't surprise us. Is she a vampire, cursed immortal, Lazarus Pit user, or cyborg?" Ayaka questioned.

"We're aliens, dammit!" Ryoko pulled on her own ears. "Hadn't this given you a freakin' clue?-!"

"Aliens. Really," Hasegawa's glasses were slipping down her nose.

"The Jurai Royal Family has... different customs than your Martian Royal Family," Ayeka sheepishly said. "Well, Not So Different," she conceded.

"It wasn't supposed to be that way, actually..." Asuna looked aside. "But, well, Mother happened, and—"

"Mother," Negi blinked. "Now I understand why she wanted us to spend our vacations in this area!"

Tenchi hummed. "I wonder how did she learn about it, though..."

....

"— so, haven't you found Nagi-kun yet?" Yosho asked from where he lay recovering his breath.

Arika shook her head sadly. "We are still working to that end."

"Ah, you're just as good as he told us...!" Airi snuggled to her side.

"How do you think the children are doing?" Yosho asked again.

The Princess smiled placidly. "If I know Negi well enough, Tenchi-kun already must have found him in a comically compromising situation with his sisters. Then they will compare and contrast notes, and one thing will lead to another..."

"Unless Mihoshi-san happens to walk in," Airi showed some concern. "She does have this gift for interrupting the best laid schemes..."

"Oh, that's why we brought a counter," Arika smiled. "They must be keeping each other entertained right now..."

....

Makie sniffed, rubbing her tears off her eyes. "It's so... kawaiiiii! These alien space operas are so moving!"

The deeply tanned blond sitting at her side looked in all directions. "Aren't you wondering where did Tenchi, Negi-kun and everyone else go, Makie-chan?"

"Oh, they must be doing secret important training stuff again!" the gymnast said. "Oh, look! Look! Magical Kyoko is about to tell Lala she's actually her long lost sister!"

"What...?-! Ooooohhhhh, I have to see this...!"