Result: It looks, smells and tastes like regular coffee. Liquid has extreme fattening and uglifying properties. It also causes extreme stupidity. The cup was later locked away to prevent further harm.
Test: A cup of blended swords, pentacles and wands.
Edited by StarAndroidJaguar on Dec 16th 2019 at 7:58:22 PM
...Result: An off-grey substance with a strange consistency. Subjects who ingested the liquid began to vomit violently and wail in pain before collapsing to the ground and dying.
Notably, all subjects reportedly had visions of a field of grass and being surrounded by animals before dying.
Test: A Cup of Robert Scranton.
Toby Fox is the only person to make an mpreg homestuck rock opera and then compose music for smash bros.
AI with access to the console
Result: A can of Red Bull. The subject who drank it immediately grew wings, and the can was confiscated as SCP-294-B.
Request: Bullet Hell in a can.
Edited by MOARPYLONZ on Nov 7th 2020 at 7:24:17 AM
Result: A drink resembling blended spinach. Once you drink it, you begin to loudly proclaim that it is the best way to lose weight.
Request: Tropers: The Series
Result: A cup of apple juice with the stem and seeds still in it.
Test: A cup of antidisestablishmentarianism.
Ukrainian Red CrossThe machine gave out 2 things: "an "OUT OF RANGE" message" and a note saying WHAT THE HELL?
Request: Cup of Life Fibers
“Don’t ask what happened during my job.”Result: D-77621 has been drowned as the liquid has rapidly infiltrated the subject's lungs.
Request: A cup of Marshal (Animal Crossing)'s favorite fruit juice
Edited by ckha42 on Sep 4th 2021 at 7:42:26 PM
Result: D-98762, after drinking the orange drink, was the subject of complaints from other D class personnel due to his newfound smug personality.
Request: A cup of Body Horror.
Edited by ZeTropeGuy999 on Sep 12th 2021 at 8:39:53 PM
And also, that’s- SarcasmResult: A cup of human bodily fluids, primarily liquified grey matter. Closer inspection revealed it possessed a conscience. The result was taken to Dr [REDACTED] and incinerated under orders of the Ethics Community. DNA tests reveal that this used to be a person called [DATA EXPUNDGED].
Test: A cup of metallic hydrogen from the mantle of Jupiter (preferably have a droid or D-class perform the test)

Result: Subject was extremely depressed. No other side effects.
Test: A cup of joe..... mama
“Now! Let us engage in the art of deduction!”