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Buying drinks from SCP-294

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TheGamechanger from Fourth Wall Since: Nov, 2016 Relationship Status: Robosexual
#1526: Jan 1st 2017 at 7:56:38 PM

Result: A clear, white liquid. When a D-Class drinks it, they temporarily speak in a strange syntax.

Test: One cup of SCP-055.

The League of Heroes
CalvinBoyOfDestiny May be Stupendous Man from Chagrin Falls Since: Mar, 2014 Relationship Status: I only want you gone
May be Stupendous Man
#1527: Jan 2nd 2017 at 9:25:11 AM

Result: OUT OF RANGE error.

Test: A cup of knowledge of 26th century technology.

Insert something clever here
selfKaiHarness BLADES OF JUDGEMENT! from The Crack in Time Since: Jun, 2016 Relationship Status: You cannot grasp the true form
BLADES OF JUDGEMENT!
#1528: Jan 2nd 2017 at 10:38:42 PM

Result: A Titanium colored fluid. When drank by a D-Class, subject shows increased signs of intelligence about the 26th century. Subject begun to claim about the future is real, but [REDACTED] subject is now for testing in [DATA EXPUNGED].

Input: A nice cup of Majin Buu.

"I hope it works this time, otherwise i would be pissed about it." - Dr. X

Listen, Zamasu may have lost Goku Black during erasure but he always is alive to this very day. IMMORTALITY IS MY BITCH!
CalvinBoyOfDestiny May be Stupendous Man from Chagrin Falls Since: Mar, 2014 Relationship Status: I only want you gone
May be Stupendous Man
#1529: Jan 4th 2017 at 5:55:58 PM

Result: A cup of liquid which seemingly rewrote the test subject's genetic structure, turning him into a copy of the titular target. Liquid and subject contained as an SCP.

Test: A cup of SCP-500. (Retconned because the previous test was the most unnecessary thing ever)

edited 9th Jan '17 5:26:35 PM by CalvinBoyOfDestiny

Insert something clever here
CalvinBoyOfDestiny May be Stupendous Man from Chagrin Falls Since: Mar, 2014 Relationship Status: I only want you gone
May be Stupendous Man
#1530: Jan 9th 2017 at 5:26:48 PM

Bump.

Insert something clever here
Savaget1337 64th Successor (Don’t ask)
64th Successor
#1531: Jan 9th 2017 at 5:35:56 PM

Result: SCP-294 dispensed a red fluid. Any illnesses that the drinker originally had was instantly cured upon consumption.


Test: A cup of "Oh God Why".

If you have a problem with Hokuto then tell it to me!
CalvinBoyOfDestiny May be Stupendous Man from Chagrin Falls Since: Mar, 2014 Relationship Status: I only want you gone
May be Stupendous Man
#1532: Jan 9th 2017 at 6:47:54 PM

Result: A white liquid. Upon consumption, D-29459 reported seeing mutilated bodies, bizarre pornography, [EXPUNGED]. Subject terminated by request.

Test: A cup of liquid Unobtanium.

edited 9th Jan '17 6:48:53 PM by CalvinBoyOfDestiny

Insert something clever here
Jaxfirebus Since: Feb, 2014
#1533: Jan 9th 2017 at 7:10:37 PM

Result: OUT OF RANGE Error, it seems like it's called Unobtainium for a reason.

Test: A cup of The Meaning of Life

"Finally, we'll know the answer to life, the universe, and everything" -Dr J██

Almohad Since: Jan, 2016
#1534: Jan 11th 2017 at 8:12:15 PM

Result: An extremely thick ichor with a fiendish white glow. Subject reported severe dementia, obssession over Japanese visual novels and animation, existential depression and an antiquated speech pattern and an obssessive sexual lust for cephalopoda on ingestion. Subject terminated by being devoured by an invisible entity.

"Oh my, now shush." -Dr. ———.

Test: A cup of dosh.

anza_sb Since: May, 2014 Relationship Status: I'm Clockwork and she's Quartz
#1535: Jan 12th 2017 at 3:24:40 AM

Result: A cup of liquid asset. Subjects drinking it soon grew a fondness towards money, some even reaching sexual levels.

Input: A cup of feels.

⏰ Twitter/Instagram/Bluesky: anzasquiddles. Deviantart: anzahanifathallah. ⏰
Almohad Since: Jan, 2016
#1536: Jan 12th 2017 at 12:34:12 PM

Result: A light lymph-like secretion of a dark blueish hue; two D-Class personnel [DATA EXPUNGED]; subjects terminated by severe dehydration and oxygen deprivation.

Test: One cup of cephalopod.

edited 4th Feb '17 5:06:27 PM by Almohad

Alucart23 Since: Jun, 2015
#1537: Mar 4th 2017 at 2:26:47 PM

Result: cup or blue blood-plasma containing suspended dna of unknown creature, with many genetic similarities to earth squids, upon consumption, subject [DATA EXPUNGED] for twelve minutes, after which the resulting creature seemingly merged with and took on the texture of the floor.

Input: cup of Gantz op.

vjoi The first Stealth Fighter! from The South. Since: Feb, 2016 Relationship Status: Mu
The first Stealth Fighter!
#1538: Mar 4th 2017 at 3:13:15 PM

Result:A red liquid that when drunk made the drinker violently kick ass.

input: a cup of water from the fountain of youth.

edited 4th Mar '17 3:14:20 PM by vjoi

Cornelius, but do not waste in useless pity the few moments left in which to escape from the hands of the enemy.
Jaxfirebus Since: Feb, 2014
#1539: Mar 4th 2017 at 3:25:40 PM

[up][up]Results: A red, black, and white liquid. Subject describes it's taste as "Tastes like [expletive redacted]!", analysis shows it nothing but paper and various inks.

[up]Results: A clear liquid, Subject that consumed said liquid was reverted into a state of infancy. Brain scans show that he would no longer remember his past life due to how his brain is no longer developed enough. Subject has been relocated to [REDACTED] orphanage and given the name [REDACTED].

Input: A cup of Bee Movie memes.

edited 4th Mar '17 3:27:02 PM by Jaxfirebus

chianticat10 Former Human from Leaving Foxfell Since: Jun, 2015 Relationship Status: The Skitty to my Wailord
Former Human
#1540: Mar 4th 2017 at 3:47:37 PM

[DATA EX-YA LIKE JAZZ?]

"Oh shit, it's memetic and-THESE ARE WINTER BOOTS!"-Dr.Zuri-BARRY B BENSON

Input:A cup of Idubbz's Osteoporosis.

“How long has it been? 23 days?”
Jaxfirebus Since: Feb, 2014
#1541: Mar 4th 2017 at 4:04:40 PM

Result: OUT OF RANGE

Input: Idubbz's crippling depression

chianticat10 Former Human from Leaving Foxfell Since: Jun, 2015 Relationship Status: The Skitty to my Wailord
Former Human
#1542: Mar 4th 2017 at 4:13:05 PM

Output: A black drink, when drunk, the subject seeks out the nearest wheelchair, jumps in it and says "I have crippling depression!"

"Yeah... just going to post this on my personal You Tube account..." -Dr.Zurita

Input:A cup of Super Minecraft Kid's salty tears.

“How long has it been? 23 days?”
Corrosion Self-Replicating Mechanism of War from Some Galaxy Since: Jun, 2016 Relationship Status: Who needs love when you have waffles?
Self-Replicating Mechanism of War
#1543: Mar 5th 2017 at 12:24:49 AM

Output: A cup of salty, clear fluid, that when drunk, causes the subject to hear the sounds of 'nine year-olds banging their mums'.

Input: A cup of Shrek

''Annihilate everything.''
StarAndroidJaguar ... from a place where you dream you'd never find Since: Feb, 2017 Relationship Status: You cannot grasp the true form
...
#1544: Mar 5th 2017 at 1:29:08 AM

Result: It looks like swamp water. When you drink it, you turn into a donkey. Then a ghostly ogre appears by your side and asks "WHAT! ARE YOU DOING! IN MY SWAMP?!" and kills you with giant green lasers from above.

Input: One of every Super Mario Bros. mushroom.

make corrections if i'm doing it wrong in any way

[down]k

edited 5th Mar '17 1:39:58 AM by StarAndroidJaguar

...
ActualBeatrice Raygun from the Salt Mines Since: Jul, 2016 Relationship Status: YOU'RE TEARING ME APART LISA
#1545: Mar 5th 2017 at 1:32:24 AM

Result: Lime-green liquid that smells like onions. Upon ingesting, causes the individual to spout quotes from the aforementioned movie along with memes of it, including the "Shrek is love" copypasta.

Input: Chicken pot pie.

[up] Didn't notice your post – was typing mine. (and not on the main thread)

edited 5th Mar '17 1:35:12 AM by ActualBeatrice

The Superstar of the Supernatural World! (debatable)
dutchguy1986 Since: Jul, 2014
#1546: Mar 5th 2017 at 3:08:53 AM

Result: A goldenbrown liquid that smells like chickensoup and is remarkably tasty considering its liquefied ingredients.

Input: Fresh squeezed Devils Fruit smoothie

edited 5th Mar '17 3:39:57 AM by dutchguy1986

Jaxfirebus Since: Feb, 2014
#1547: Mar 6th 2017 at 3:04:38 PM

Result: A strange foul smelling black liquid, upon consumption the user gains various powers, but then explodes half a second later. Analysis shows that the liquid is made of of various power-giving fruits that conflict with each-other.

Input: A cup of SCP-666-J

Corrosion Self-Replicating Mechanism of War from Some Galaxy Since: Jun, 2016 Relationship Status: Who needs love when you have waffles?
Self-Replicating Mechanism of War
#1548: Mar 6th 2017 at 10:45:09 PM

Result: A cup of black liquid. Upon closer inspection, it turned out to be motor oil. At that point, Dr. Gerald had managed to slip into a car without supervision. The moment he turned the ignition, every vehicle outside Site-█, from civilian cars to armoured trucks, immediately exploded. Dr. Gerald was nowhere to be found, and the researcher who requested the order was reassigned to Keter duty.

Input: A cup of the dankest memes ever made

''Annihilate everything.''
ActualBeatrice Raygun from the Salt Mines Since: Jul, 2016 Relationship Status: YOU'RE TEARING ME APART LISA
#1549: Mar 8th 2017 at 2:18:49 AM

Result: A Mountain Dew paper cup, with rainbow liquid inside. Upon ingestion, it tastes like Cool Ranch Doritos, and somehow generates a pair of pixel art shades sliding in front of the person's eyes. One of the subjects ingesting this liquid reported seeing "the spiciest memes in my whole life, m8 [sic]" and singing We are Number One from the beginning, to the end perfectly.

Input: Rainbow Connection.

The Superstar of the Supernatural World! (debatable)
vjoi The first Stealth Fighter! from The South. Since: Feb, 2016 Relationship Status: Mu
The first Stealth Fighter!
#1550: Mar 8th 2017 at 2:54:28 AM

Result:A multicolored drink is dispensed when Dr.[Readcted] drank the substance he reverted to the mindset of a happy child. He has been moved to site {redacted]

Input: a cup of godhood.

edited 8th Mar '17 3:19:30 PM by vjoi

Cornelius, but do not waste in useless pity the few moments left in which to escape from the hands of the enemy.

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