- Malsidor, Pastbound Praetor 3WRG
- Legendary Artifact Creature - Praetor
- Vigilance, Improvise
- Whenever you cast a creature spell, you may put a -1 / -1 counter or a +1 / +1 counter on target creature, and a charge counter on target artifact.
- Whenever you cast a noncreature spell, you may Proliferate then create a 1 / 1 Artifact Enchantment Creature Myr token.
- 6 / 7
- Thrown through a rift from a time when horror fought horror.
- Metalweave Nurturing 2WG
- Sorcery
- Put 2 +1 / +1 counters on target creature you control, then search your library for a land card and put that card into play. If that creature had power 4 or greater, search your library for 2 land cards and put them into play instead.
- My metalweaving combines flesh, nature and metal seamlessly, pain no longer required. -Malsidor
- Lore: Sent through time via a Time Rift created by singularly powerful Artifacts interacting, Malsidor seems to come from a possible future of a Compleated Theros. He represents the Indominus Engine as Praetor, a group of "knights" who are devoted to augmentation, attaining through Compleation the most masterful, powerful forms replete with the greatest skill possible. Strange Myr are used as their "squires". They exist as a sort of advance force, rooting out holdouts, but in more recent times defend from a horde of melted, fleshy monstrosities from beyond. They are a strict meritocracy, the more advanced their number become, the greater augmentation is applied.
Edited by NickTheSwing on Nov 8th 2019 at 8:07:30 AM
Arcane Engine - 4
Artifact
Imprint - When ~ enters the battlefield, you may exile an Instant or Sorcery card from your hand.
{X}, {T}: You may copy the exiled card. If you do, you may cast the copy without paying its mana cost. X is the converted mana cost of the exiled card.
Edited by kagescorpionakki on Nov 9th 2019 at 11:49:51 AM
What is so amusing about this? Why do you take lives? How can you forget?- Sleeper's Strike 2B
- Instant
- Destroy target Green creature, then you gain 2 life and your opponent loses 2 life.
- Let's just say the Elvish High Supreme is perfectly in pieces. -Kerrick IX.
- Depicts the armored elf lord thinking he pinned the blond triple agent, only noticing an exploding sphere weapon when its already going off.
Roots of the Land - 4GG
Creature - Plant
Defender
{T}: Untap all lands you control.
0/12
Stasis Chamber - 9
Artifact
At the beginning of your upkeep, sacrifice a permanent.
Players skip their untap steps.
Edited by kagescorpionakki on Nov 10th 2019 at 7:17:33 AM
What is so amusing about this? Why do you take lives? How can you forget?Failure's Lesson - U
Enchantment
Whenever a spell you control is countered by a spell or ability controlled by an opponent, you may draw a card.
"I haven't failed. I've merely found another point of data."
Shared Treasures - 4
Artifact
Spells cost {1} less to cast.
Whenever a player casts a spell, that player may draw a card.
At the beginning of each player's upkeep, each player gains 1 life.
The true treasure is each other.
Giant Dad - 2BBRR
Legendary Creature - Human
Haste, Trample, First Strike
When ~ attacks and deals damage to an opponent, controller may pay an additional BR. If player does, ~ deals damage equal to its Power to target creature opponent controls. Giant Dad takes damage equal to target creature's Power.
If ~ does not attack it deals damage equal to its Power to its controller at end of turn.
6/3
The legend never dies
Edited by M84 on Nov 14th 2019 at 10:50:50 PM
Disgusted, but not surprisedLegends Never Die - 2W
Legendary Enchantment
Whenever a Legendary creature dies, return it to it's owner's hand.
Story's End - WB
Instant
Exile target legendary creature. Search it's controller's hand, graveyard, and library for any number of cards that share a name with that creature, and exile them. Then shuffle that player's library.
Edited by kagescorpionakki on Nov 16th 2019 at 2:25:10 PM
What is so amusing about this? Why do you take lives? How can you forget?- Adrunn, Lord of All Elk 1WUG
- Legendary Creature - Elk Noble
- Hexproof, Trample
- All other Elk you control get +1 / +1.
- Whenever an Elk you control deals combat damage, you gain 1 life and draw 1 card.
- 4 / 4
- I shifted his form, and he made it his own. -Oko, Thief of Crowns.
- Eternatus the Distorted Devourer 14
- Legendary Creature - Eldrazi Dragon
- Indestructible, Annihilator 3
- When ~ is cast, draw 3 cards.
- When ~ attacks, exile cards from your opponent's library equal to the number of permanents they control.
- Any damage this creature deals to creatures with Toughness 8 or more is doubled.
- 14 / 14
Edited by NickTheSwing on Nov 22nd 2019 at 4:58:39 AM
Grayslayer Poppet - 4
Artifact Creature - Scarecrow
~ is all colors.
Whenever ~ deals damage to, blocks, or is blocked by a colorless nonartifact creature, exile that creature.
3/3
At the end of every rainbow is a wicker man with a scythe.
Reaperman's Care - 6
Legendary Tribal Artifact - Scarecrow Equipment
Whenever a Scarecrow enters the battlefield under your control, you may attach ~ to it.
Equipped creature gets +1/+1 for each of its colors and has "Scarecrow creatures you control get +1/+1."
Equip {6}
What else can the harvest hope for?
- Driskoll, Archon of Calamity 4WWW
- Legendary Creature - Archon
- Indestructible
- If a spell, activated ability or triggered ability you control would make you sacrifice permanents while you control this card, you do not sacrifice permanents instead.
- If you cast a White spell with Converted Mana Cost 5 or greater, you can have all Permanents you control gain Indestructible until end of turn.
- 6 / 6
- I have come to separate the wheat from the chaff, and shall commence as judge, jury and especially executioner.
Lore: Driskoll was a tyrannical, fanatical and merciless Archon from an unknown plane. He passed judgment upon all who would not bow to his will. Eventually, Driskoll was vanquished by the Yutvarian hero Kei Ladaris, who cast the tyrant through a strange possessed portal.
Morph - U
Instant
Turn over target creature or artefact. (A face-down card is a colourless 2/2 creature.)
Honestly surprised something like this doesn’t already exist. (And yes, the intent is that creatures with the Morph keyword can restore themselves, and if you cast it on a double-sided card it transforms instead of turning face-down.)
ERROR: The current state of the world is unacceptable. Save anyway? YES/NO
Actually, per the rulings on Ixidron
, double-sided cards would not transform. They'd just become 2/2 creatures. This is because the other side of the card is used to conveniently keep track of what it transforms/melds into, but each 'side' of the card is assumed to be its own card.
That's still a really good card, though, since you can get rid of any non-hexproof creature and replace it with a vanilla 2/2.
The Flipside
Legendary Land
{T}: Add {C}.
{2}, {T}: Turn target face-down creature face-up.
{4}, {T}: Turn target nontoken creature face-down.
- Utgern the Blood Prince 3UBR
- Legendary Creature - Vampire Noble
- Flying
- At the beginning of your upkeep, Scry X, where X is the number of Vampires you control.
- Instead of drawing a card for your turn, reveal the top card of your deck. If that card is a land, add it to your hand. If that card is a nonland permanent, you may sacrifice a permanent of the same type to put it into play. If that card is an instant or sorcery, you may cast a copy of that spell by paying life equal to its CMC, then add that card to your hand at the end of the turn.
- 5 / 5
- Drinker of Notions UB
- Creature - Vampire
- Flash
- When ~ ETB, target creature gets -1 / -2
- When ~ deals combat damage to a player, you can reveal 1 card from your opponent's hand. If its CMC is lower than this card's, exile it. Otherwise, you lose 3 life.
- 2 / 1
Edited by NickTheSwing on Nov 23rd 2019 at 8:25:37 AM
"Transform [X]"
, yeah.
(It's still hilarious to me that due to the exact wording of Moonmist, it turns Insectile Aberration back into Delver of Secrets.)
Blessed Cup - 3
Artifact
{1}: Transform ~. Any player can activate this ability.
At the beginning of your upkeep, double your life total.
(Transform)
Cursed Cup
Artifact
{2}: Transform ~.
At the beginning of your upkeep, you lose half your life, rounded up.
- Kolomaza, Antiquity Serpent 5UUUU
- Legendary Creature - Serpent
- Indestructible, Islandhome
- This card casts 1 less to cast for each Basic Island you control.
- When this card enters the battlefield or attacks, you can target 2 lands your opponents control. Those lands become Basic Islands.
- 9 / 9
- Deathless Deepsnake 2UUU
- Creature - Serpent
- Islandhome
- You can cast this creature from your graveyard or in exile.
- 4 / 5
- Vicious Snapping Serpent 3U
- Creature - Serpent
- Islandhome, Reach
- This card ETB with a +1 / +1 counter on it for each Island and each Blue creature you control.
- 2 / 2
- Chalice of the Deepest Waves 5
- Artifact
- While you control this untapped card, all Lands become Basic Islands.
- Untap this card during each player's untap phase.
- 3, Tap, exile target creature you control. Any player may activate this ability.
- Ocean's Wrath 2UU
- Instant
- As an additional cost to cast this card, either reveal 2 Serpents, Octopuses, Squids or Krakens in your hand or pay 5
- Return all nonblue nonland permanents to their owners' hands. For each creature returned this way, create a 6 / 6 Blue Serpent creature token.
Edited by NickTheSwing on Nov 26th 2019 at 11:00:54 AM
Double Trouble (1UB)
Legendary Creature - Shapeshifter
2/2
1UB, Pay 2 life: ~ becomes a copy of target creature and gains this ability. That creature's controller loses 1 life.
"Ta-da! Thank you, thank you!"
Bamboozling Bamboo - UG
Creature - Plant
Defender
{2}{U}, {T}: Look at the top four cards of target opponent's library. Put up to two of them into that player's graveyard, then put the rest on the top of that player's library in any order.
0/4
Accursed Starfish - 4U
Creature - Starfish
{X}{U}{U}, {T}: Fateseal X. (To fateseal X, look at the top X cards of an opponent's library, then put any number of them on the bottom of that player's library and the rest on top in any order.)
0/8
To see it is an ill omen. To tread upon it is to invite a terrible fate.

Questionable Loyalties - 3R
Sorcery
Gain control of target Planeswalker until end of turn.
You can never really tell whose side a Planeswalker is on.
Realmseal - WW
What is so amusing about this? Why do you take lives? How can you forget?Enchantment
Players can't cast Planeswalker spells.
There are some worlds beyond even the brightest Spark's reach.