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Willbyr Hi (Y2K) Relationship Status: With my statistically significant other
Hi
#2376: Nov 16th 2020 at 6:20:06 AM

not digging through the thread to see if this has already been done

"The child" from The Mandalorian should be called Layheehoo, as he’s a Yodaling.

Edited by Willbyr on Nov 16th 2020 at 6:20:51 AM

NotSoBadassLongcoat The Showrunner of Dzwiedz 24 from People's Democratic Republic of Badassia (Old as dirt) Relationship Status: Puppy love
The Showrunner of Dzwiedz 24
#2377: Nov 27th 2020 at 5:51:06 AM

So I played Trailmakers yesterday. They said I would need magnets to deliver an unstable piece of cargo, but I managed to brute-force it.

Magnets?! THIS! IS! SPARTA!

"what the complete, unabridged, 4k ultra HD fuck with bonus features" - Mark Von Lewis
MikeK Since: Jan, 2001
#2378: Dec 4th 2020 at 11:02:02 AM

(Kinda stolen from a Christmas riddle/activity page, so that's your hint)

What do you call an apartment where two psychiatrists live? the nutcracker suite

TheWhistleTropes janet likes her new icon. Since: Aug, 2015 Relationship Status: In Lesbians with you
janet likes her new icon.
#2379: Dec 4th 2020 at 12:34:48 PM

So did you hear that song about traveling on the road?

Yeah, but the bridge just kinda falls apart.

she/her/they | wall | sandbox
BlackFaithStar [Hiatus til March] from 🇲🇾 (UTC plus 8) (Less Newbie) Relationship Status: Longing for my OTP
[Hiatus til March]
#2380: Dec 8th 2020 at 4:09:24 PM

Therapist: What do we say when we're feeling sad?

Patient: Don't be sad. Because sad backwards is das. And das not good.

Therapist: Hey can I use that?

When you're alone I'm reaching out to let you know that you're far from strangers, like the savior
Teemo from Nottingham, UK (Before Recorded History) Relationship Status: In another castle
#2381: Dec 8th 2020 at 9:17:41 PM

Did you hear about the murder at the Pepsi plant? The bottler did it!

madface7 Kuma appreciation gang from a Since: May, 2019 Relationship Status: I LOVE THIS DOCTOR!
Kuma appreciation gang
#2382: Dec 9th 2020 at 7:31:33 AM

My teacher said my body cells were somatic.

I didn't know they were Jews! Happy Hanukkah!

Yeah, I posted this in Trash Heap, but look I had to share this. I came up with it

Edited by madface7 on Dec 9th 2020 at 10:22:45 AM

Kumatora needs to be appreciated more. Appreciate her.
NotSoBadassLongcoat The Showrunner of Dzwiedz 24 from People's Democratic Republic of Badassia (Old as dirt) Relationship Status: Puppy love
The Showrunner of Dzwiedz 24
#2383: Dec 21st 2020 at 9:42:39 AM

Doctor, my upper lip hurts.

Well, it must ache.

"what the complete, unabridged, 4k ultra HD fuck with bonus features" - Mark Von Lewis
StarAndroidJaguar ... from a place where you dream you'd never find Since: Feb, 2017 Relationship Status: You cannot grasp the true form
...
#2384: Dec 21st 2020 at 11:39:07 AM

What do you call a canine with bad grammar that lives in the past?

A we'rewolf.

...
megarockman from The Sixth Borough (Experienced Trainee)
#2385: Jan 3rd 2021 at 8:50:40 PM

Complex numbers are fun and games until someone loses an i. Then shit gets real.

The damned queen and the relentless knight.
MFLuder Since: Jul, 2012
#2386: Jan 20th 2021 at 1:18:05 PM

Trump joke for the road: where in Russia was the pee tape taken?

The Urinal Mountains.

MagmaTeaMerry My Head Is On Fire from A forest somewhere Since: Sep, 2020
My Head Is On Fire
#2387: Feb 4th 2021 at 8:21:20 AM

If Double D from Ed, Edd n Eddy was a fan of soccer, which famous soccer player would be his favorite?

Messi, Messi, Messi

My AO3 profile. Let sleeping cats lie and be cute and calming.
megarockman from The Sixth Borough (Experienced Trainee)
#2388: Feb 6th 2021 at 4:32:35 PM

A geographer calls up a sandwich shop and said, "Yeah, I'm really Hungary, so can I get a Turkey with extra Chile, easy on the Greece. Qatar in half and put it for Chad — I'm paying by Czech card and Russian over as fast as I can."

The damned queen and the relentless knight.
Teemo from Nottingham, UK (Before Recorded History) Relationship Status: In another castle
#2389: Feb 6th 2021 at 9:53:26 PM

Did you hear that Sting has been kidnapped? The Police have no lead.

megarockman from The Sixth Borough (Experienced Trainee)
#2390: Jun 9th 2021 at 11:51:46 AM

Courtesy of my supermarket.

Sweet dreams are made of cheese
Who am I to diss a brie

Edited by megarockman on Jun 9th 2021 at 2:52:05 PM

The damned queen and the relentless knight.
Teemo from Nottingham, UK (Before Recorded History) Relationship Status: In another castle
#2391: Jun 9th 2021 at 12:43:15 PM

The Native American actor who played Tarzan's son is releasing an autobiography. It'll be called "A Sioux named Boy."

Delibirda from Splatsville Since: Sep, 2020 Relationship Status: I wanna be your dog
#2392: Jun 17th 2021 at 1:57:44 AM

Contains sax and violence!

"Listen up, Marina, because this is SUPER important. Whatever you do, don't eat th“ “DON'T EAT WHAT?! Your text box ran out of space!”
Weirdguy149 Former King from Lumiose City Since: Jul, 2014 Relationship Status: I'd jump in front of a train for ya!
Former King
#2393: Jun 17th 2021 at 5:47:05 AM

Did you hear about the guy whose arm caught on fire? He was arrested for brandishing a firearm.

The legend has returned.
MikeK Since: Jan, 2001
#2394: Jun 17th 2021 at 11:06:31 AM

Don't try to pick up a date at the Star Wars convention, that's just looking for love in Alderaan places.

Noaqiyeum we must dissent (it/they) from across the gulf of space (Time Abyss) Relationship Status: Arm chopping is not a love language!
we must dissent (it/they)
#2395: Jun 18th 2021 at 10:03:19 AM

Thinking about starting a celebrity gossip blog called The Stars Are Going Out

ERROR: The current state of the world is unacceptable. Save anyway? YES/NO
Noaqiyeum we must dissent (it/they) from across the gulf of space (Time Abyss) Relationship Status: Arm chopping is not a love language!
we must dissent (it/they)
#2396: Jul 5th 2021 at 10:28:16 PM

The main conflict of WWI was between the Central Powers (Germany, Austria-Hungary, Bulgaria, and Turkey) and the Triple Entente (Britain, France, and Russia).

A triple entente, as I understand it, is much like a double entente but with one more friend involved.

ERROR: The current state of the world is unacceptable. Save anyway? YES/NO
NotSoBadassLongcoat The Showrunner of Dzwiedz 24 from People's Democratic Republic of Badassia (Old as dirt) Relationship Status: Puppy love
The Showrunner of Dzwiedz 24
#2397: Jul 23rd 2021 at 3:06:35 AM

Notoriously bloodthirsty Viking chieftains gathering to discuss matters civilly?

Believe it or not, it was a thing.

Edited by NotSoBadassLongcoat on Jul 23rd 2021 at 12:16:41 PM

"what the complete, unabridged, 4k ultra HD fuck with bonus features" - Mark Von Lewis
MagmaTeaMerry My Head Is On Fire from A forest somewhere Since: Sep, 2020
My Head Is On Fire
#2398: Jul 27th 2021 at 2:03:01 AM

What did the levelheaded partner of the overconfident adventurer say to him when they were buying winter clothes together?

Don't get khaki.

My AO3 profile. Let sleeping cats lie and be cute and calming.
antenna_ears from California Since: Apr, 2020 Relationship Status: Coming soon to theaters
#2399: Aug 4th 2021 at 12:11:35 PM

Jar Jar Binks sexually harassed me, but who would believe me if I told them? After all, since Jar Jar is so beloved by all and holds a chair on the Galactic Senate, the public would never believe this, and just say I'm falsely accusing the lovable Gungan. I guess I'll have to team up with other Jar Jar victims to tell our stories, and encourage others who have been affected by Jar Jar in the past to speak up. I'll call it:

#Meesa Too

Edited by antenna_ears on Aug 4th 2021 at 12:13:46 PM

PhysicalStamina ain't nothin' but a party y'all (4 Score & 7 Years Ago) Relationship Status: Coming soon to theaters
ain't nothin' but a party y'all
#2400: Aug 4th 2021 at 1:40:38 PM

National Enquirer headline: Billie Eilish Reveals Relationship with Joker Actor Joaquin Phoenix in Blog Post Entitled "You Should See Me with a Clown"

Do not spare the feelings of those who would not spare yours.

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