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Counterclock Since: Feb, 2013
#47151: Jun 2nd 2011 at 7:42:38 AM

As you examine the item, you can clearly see it's a wad of wrapped up $20 dollar bills.

   A Voice in the darkness beckons you!   

the 20s are made from the dead leaves, licking the leaves proves their worth is a bout of Church Vs. Prison the Movie debut.

  • So about that Car and dieing
  • Continue with what that hairy molester wanted you to do
  • Bring the hand of God down upon your Enemies (Note: A Samuel L Jackson Move requires you to part with your blue key, deny y/n?)

ImipolexG frozen in time from all our yesterdays Since: Jan, 2001
frozen in time
#47152: Jun 2nd 2011 at 7:45:14 AM

you heard Sabbath Assembly

Assuming that is a statement and not a question, it is inaccurate.

I love bringing the Hand of God down on my enemies. As an agnostic, though, I am not sure it is really His Hand.

no one will notice that I changed this
SunshineWerewolf Since: Jan, 2011
#47153: Jun 2nd 2011 at 7:46:32 AM

  • approach the Doorman and reveal to him that you are in possession of several Valuable Antique Lace Carafes

@Imi - it was a question, I just sometimes drop ending punctuation. Either way, this song I posted here is better

edited 2nd Jun '11 7:47:22 AM by SunshineWerewolf

mmysqueeant I'm A Dirty Cowboy from Essairrrrcks Since: Oct, 2010
I'm A Dirty Cowboy
#47154: Jun 2nd 2011 at 7:46:33 AM

ah, the old "Blasphemous Stranger". Jesus told me about it in a dream.

Good bloke, bit crude though.

Counterclock Since: Feb, 2013
#47155: Jun 2nd 2011 at 7:50:40 AM

The doorman is quite large, but from his resume, he is not actually in charge.

"I am the doorman, your bill for the evening will be $50 dollars for entry"

The doorman pulls out a salami slice and begins to place it in his bong, taking brief smokes out of it before starring angrily at the presence in front of him.

-This presence is you!!!-

edited 2nd Jun '11 7:51:18 AM by Counterclock

SunshineWerewolf Since: Jan, 2011
#47156: Jun 2nd 2011 at 7:52:18 AM

  • place a Carafe into the Doorman's bong. While he is incapacitated, hurry past him and inside (!!!)

Counterclock Since: Feb, 2013
#47157: Jun 2nd 2011 at 7:58:22 AM

The Doorman loses 30 hp, rendering him first unconscious, and then dead through a series of well placed bug attacks to the inside of his throat.

The Heavy door looms before you, It's silver lining only as shiny as the brass on your car.

An alarm for the door opening mechanism has been activated. The door will open in T-Minus. 3. 2. 1.

  • Enter the door, but not before kicking the doorman, to ensure his eventual entry into heaven is interrupted
  • Look around and skin your knees with a spoon
  • You are already inside the door, disregard Mr. Boulevarde There for greater pastures.
  • Examine the inside of the (Whatever it was you entered}

edited 2nd Jun '11 7:59:24 AM by Counterclock

SunshineWerewolf Since: Jan, 2011
#47158: Jun 2nd 2011 at 8:02:05 AM

  • jam out a funky beat to the 3-2-1, enter the establishment, pointing your toothbrush at the nearest object

ImipolexG frozen in time from all our yesterdays Since: Jan, 2001
frozen in time
#47159: Jun 2nd 2011 at 8:02:53 AM

-listens to Sabbath Assembly-

Hey yeah, this is sorta cool.

storedopper

no one will notice that I changed this
Counterclock Since: Feb, 2013
#47160: Jun 2nd 2011 at 8:08:11 AM

Your Toothbrush is pointed at a Woman with very large teeth, your funky beat draws the attention of everyone inside the area.

The large woman steals your toothbrush, rendering you without it. Roll a 1-sided dice for a comparison between the duck and the sky.

Large Woman:"Why thank ya kindly young man, I have very large tonsils."

  • You are abandoned, your wife abandoned you, she ran off with your Mexican lover too! His name was Pablo, you used to share a wine cellar together!
  • Begrudgingly accept the lose of your toothbrush and punch out the large woman, using the confusion to further examine the other patriots in the room.
  • Mix a song on your Z-pad, use it to Funky the room enough for a Large bell to ring, Pop Quiz time follows those who wait.

edited 2nd Jun '11 8:10:25 AM by Counterclock

SunshineWerewolf Since: Jan, 2011
#47161: Jun 2nd 2011 at 8:11:13 AM

  • Add More Fire, you're not gonna let that bitch get you down again! Use the Z-pad to determine the location of Sweden

Counterclock Since: Feb, 2013
#47162: Jun 2nd 2011 at 8:19:42 AM

Using your long spaghetti arm, you smash two rocks together and light the poor woman on fire, Woman suffers 3 points of damage.

The history of the Z-pad is dangerous, but you manage to find Sweden, It's 10,000 miles to the north

A glowing tiger is licking the furniture, your combustible fire is attracting its attention, with a hungry hungry stride, It makes it's way across the dance floor.

  • Pray for your God to give you a baby... the only way he can, biblically!
  • Rise forth through the ashes of your fresh kill with a glint in your eye and your money on your mind.
  • Poke the ashes of Orion's belt, Star consolations make the best pasta sauce.

ImipolexG frozen in time from all our yesterdays Since: Jan, 2001
frozen in time
#47163: Jun 2nd 2011 at 8:21:53 AM

...Counterclock is on a roll here. A very weird roll.

-voodoo priests wearing zoot suits appear-

no one will notice that I changed this
SunshineWerewolf Since: Jan, 2011
#47164: Jun 2nd 2011 at 8:22:19 AM

  • place the roll of $20 notes on your head and inform the tiger that it cannot exist under the terms of the Geneva Convention!

Jumpingzombie Since: Jan, 2001
#47165: Jun 2nd 2011 at 8:27:40 AM

Freedom is a strange concept.

Why do I ponder it so?

Counterclock Since: Feb, 2013
#47166: Jun 2nd 2011 at 8:29:53 AM

The Tiger explodes in a technicolor rainbow that looks Photoshopped, A loud voice bellows through the Room.

"Can YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE RULES OF THE 5?"

The voice belongs to a Man on the upper level of the room, he merrily takes the stairs down to ground level and begins cleaning up after the patriots, This man is a janitor who is acting like a butler.

  • OMG It's a cat!
  • Be wary of the strangle Butler, But approach with a lust in your eyes. A lust for money and battle!
  • Quickly repent for your sins of breathing, stare into the abyss to get a good location of the nearest transport.

ImipolexG frozen in time from all our yesterdays Since: Jan, 2001
frozen in time
#47167: Jun 2nd 2011 at 8:30:24 AM

I used to think about freedom sometimes. And also the nature of good and evil.

Then I decided that those were useless to think about, so I turned my attention to other things.

no one will notice that I changed this
Counterclock Since: Feb, 2013
#47168: Jun 2nd 2011 at 8:31:42 AM

Everybody is free, the only thing that is a lock is the mental barriers we used to form society.

Realistically, nothing stands in your way but yourself.

SunshineWerewolf Since: Jan, 2011
#47169: Jun 2nd 2011 at 8:32:55 AM

  • attempt to take photos of the rainbow with your Z-pad and subsequently sell the photos to the butler to fund your trip to Sweden.

[up] Wise. Counterclock wise.

... I think the first post in YF I made was that pun. Oh well. This time I's be serious about it.

edited 2nd Jun '11 8:33:45 AM by SunshineWerewolf

Jumpingzombie Since: Jan, 2001
#47170: Jun 2nd 2011 at 8:39:46 AM

I have been fascinated by freedom for awhile. I have never truly felt free. And not in that child way, but more in I have no freedom for where my life is going. Why pre-destination also interests me.

Counterclock Since: Feb, 2013
#47171: Jun 2nd 2011 at 8:41:00 AM

You manage to work the Z-Pad enough to find the Photo option and start taking pictures. As they print out though, the photos reveal to all be of Cats with hilarious captions in front of them.

The butler genderbends into a maid. Roll for scary pictures to be implanted into your mind. ~Rolls a 45-sided dice~ you are now curious about the side-effects of Mand-Ripe on a tree.

The Maid sees the picture and purchases them with glee, please add $455 dollars to your inventory

The furthest person in the room is eyeing you with its feet, it pulls up a chair and motions You to come on over

  • Roll out the drugs and select from your inventory the ability to breath.
  • Pour the Poor into a house of destitute, looking over their corpses with a hint of lemony goodness.
  • Do as any sane person would do, go over to the Bar patron, but wait and watch with your eyes as a demon from the underground railroad threatens democracy.

ImipolexG frozen in time from all our yesterdays Since: Jan, 2001
frozen in time
#47172: Jun 2nd 2011 at 8:41:12 AM

I think I always had a tendency to want to believe in fate instead. Maybe because it relieves me of the burden of being responsible for my own destiny.

no one will notice that I changed this
Jumpingzombie Since: Jan, 2001
#47173: Jun 2nd 2011 at 8:44:27 AM

I believe many if not most events in life are arbitrary to another. People just get caught into them, thus causing even more changes and chaos. I don't really believe in pre-destination, I just find it interesting.

Counterclock Since: Feb, 2013
#47174: Jun 2nd 2011 at 8:45:51 AM

Human life perpetuated out of random events involving science and cells.

For such a thing like that, Don't you dare mock randomness and chaos, they've got friends in high places.

SunshineWerewolf Since: Jan, 2011
#47175: Jun 2nd 2011 at 8:46:22 AM

  • surrender your palindrome and walk over to the chair; enquire to the figure about the possibility of turnips arising in the present economic state


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