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ITT: ''WE ARE THE SOVIET TECHNOCRATS VS NAZI OCCULT EMPIRE''

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Gloom Blue Eyed Matador from The Balcony Since: Mar, 2010
Blue Eyed Matador
#176: Jun 4th 2010 at 4:48:38 PM

Let's see, I've got 15 Apocalypse Tanks, 30 Hammer Tanks, 12 Flame-Tanks, 23 Acid-Tanks, 22 Tesla Tanks, 15 Grinder Tanks, 8 Tornado Tanks, 5 Ion Tanks, 3 Wave Motion Tanks, 2 Particle Disruptor Tanks, 19 Aqua-Tanks, 11 Proton Collider Tanks, 6 Sonic-Boom Tanks, 20 Rhino Tanks...

And all of them pointed at you.

IS GOOD TIME TO RUN, COWARDS!

Formerly known as Dave IX, even more formerly known as Wretchkin.
SullenFrog (Elder Troper) Relationship Status: I wanna know about these strangers like me
#177: Jun 4th 2010 at 5:08:22 PM

-takes note of the assembled tanks. Wotan's lips curl upwards in a faint smile-

You Mortals Never Cease To Amuse Me. Perhaps I Should reward your Fighting Spirit, Sons of The Rus.

-flips Gungnir over and stabs it into the ground. A rainbow descends from the heavens and touches the earth at the point of impact-

Behold Bifrost, Mortals, And Steel Yourselves for the Greatest Battle of Your Lives!

EINHERJAR, TO ME!!!

The Danse Macabre Codex
Colonial1.1 Purveyor of Obscurity from The Marvelous River City (4 Score & 7 Years Ago)
Purveyor of Obscurity
#178: Jun 4th 2010 at 5:12:27 PM

C.A.: THIS IS THE LANDSHIP MARX SPEAKING. DO NOT RETREAT. FALL BACK, BUT DO NOT RETREAT! FIGHT LIKE THE BRITISH DID, BUT WIN!

"He could not know it. For it was not all a joke."
Gloom Blue Eyed Matador from The Balcony Since: Mar, 2010
Blue Eyed Matador
#179: Jun 4th 2010 at 5:41:04 PM

A Rainbow? Wow, how manly and intimidating!

-opens fire on German Troops and Valkyries-

Fall back? Fine, but let the record show that it was a brave falling back!

-The tanks fall back (bravely)-

Formerly known as Dave IX, even more formerly known as Wretchkin.
SullenFrog (Elder Troper) Relationship Status: I wanna know about these strangers like me
#180: Jun 4th 2010 at 6:01:23 PM

-they come, pouring down the Bifrost bridge like some massive swarm of army ants—warriors, clad in furs and armour, brandishing swords, spears and axes. They laugh and sing bawdy songs in Norse and Old English, and as soon as they set foot on the ground, they kill. Their blades fall indiscriminately, felling friend and foe alike and cleaving steel like knives through butter.

They come in their hundreds, in their thousands, in their tens of thousands, and whenever they are struck down, they rise again within seconds.

They are the Einherjar, and they have come to sate their bloodlust.-

edited 4th Jun '10 6:08:14 PM by SullenFrog

The Danse Macabre Codex
Gloom Blue Eyed Matador from The Balcony Since: Mar, 2010
Blue Eyed Matador
#181: Jun 4th 2010 at 6:05:06 PM

Giant devil-god-thing, now would be a good time to act!

Hey, this is a good opportunity to try out my Super-Soldier Legion!

Formerly known as Dave IX, even more formerly known as Wretchkin.
Colonial1.1 Purveyor of Obscurity from The Marvelous River City (4 Score & 7 Years Ago)
Purveyor of Obscurity
#182: Jun 4th 2010 at 6:09:36 PM

C.A.: FIRE ANTI-PERSONNEL ROUNDS. COMPLETELY DESTROY THEIR BODIES.

"He could not know it. For it was not all a joke."
Gloom Blue Eyed Matador from The Balcony Since: Mar, 2010
Blue Eyed Matador
#183: Jun 4th 2010 at 6:15:29 PM

No need to shout! Now ADVANCE, MY IRON PATRIOTS!!

-A swarm of transport vehicles is teleported onto the battlefield. Out of each emerges a battalion of 7 foot high heavily armed soviet cyborgs, painted red-

FOR THE GLORY OF MOTHER RUSSIA!

-They charge, firing Anti-Personnel rounds as instructed-

edited 4th Jun '10 6:15:44 PM by Gloom

Formerly known as Dave IX, even more formerly known as Wretchkin.
SullenFrog (Elder Troper) Relationship Status: I wanna know about these strangers like me
#184: Jun 4th 2010 at 6:29:51 PM

-The machines' attack is only partially successful. while scores of Einherjar are felled by the Anti-Personnel rounds, scores more continue to pour down Bifrost-

-Wotan looks on, a cruel glint in his eye-

I Have Not Had This Much Fun Since Loki Swindled that Poor Fool Of a Jotunn By Turning Himself Into a Mare!

edited 4th Jun '10 6:31:16 PM by SullenFrog

The Danse Macabre Codex
Gloom Blue Eyed Matador from The Balcony Since: Mar, 2010
Blue Eyed Matador
#185: Jun 4th 2010 at 6:33:09 PM

...The Gods are weird.

-Iron Patriots continue to teleport in-

Keep at it my children, for now I must depart. But don't worry, for soon I shall return with my mightiest creation... EVER!

-teleports away-

(And now, sleep.)

Formerly known as Dave IX, even more formerly known as Wretchkin.
Colonial1.1 Purveyor of Obscurity from The Marvelous River City (4 Score & 7 Years Ago)
Purveyor of Obscurity
#186: Jun 4th 2010 at 6:44:58 PM

Colonel Aleksandr: The Champion of Perfect Communism may need to be activated...

"He could not know it. For it was not all a joke."
Chabal2 Since: Jan, 2010
#187: Jun 5th 2010 at 1:19:31 AM

-The dead russians maintain their advance. They feel neither pain nor fear, and attack with cold calculated precision, making them a match for the wild Norsemen-

AND NOW YOU HIDE BEHIND YOUR SYCOPHANTS.

-With a spell, causes the dead to be wreathed in unquenchable hellfire, setting the Vikings on fire as well-

BURN.

SullenFrog (Elder Troper) Relationship Status: I wanna know about these strangers like me
#188: Jun 5th 2010 at 6:00:45 AM

Hide?

-Wotan throws back his head and roars with laughter-

Fool Of A Black God! The Einherjar are Here To Amuse Themselves By Testing Their Metal Against The Sons of the Rus. I, On the Other Hand...

-bestrides the battlefield like a grim colossus towards Czernobog, lightning crackling along Gungnir's length and a mad glint in his eye-

Am Here For You.

The Danse Macabre Codex
Chabal2 Since: Jan, 2010
#189: Jun 5th 2010 at 6:16:35 AM

-Wings unfolding, flies down from the mountain, landing with a Ground Pound in front of Wotan (hey, how big is Wotan?)-

YOU WOULD CHALLENGE THE NIGHT ITSELF? YOU SHALL NOT BE KNOWN AS WOTAN ONE-EYE, BUT WOTAN THE FOOLHARDY.

SullenFrog (Elder Troper) Relationship Status: I wanna know about these strangers like me
#190: Jun 5th 2010 at 6:21:56 AM

(at least as big as you.)

I'm Going To Enjoy Bloodying You, Black God. Your Head Shall Be Mounted In Valhalla For All To See!

-thrusts with Gungnir at Czernobog's chest-

The Danse Macabre Codex
Chabal2 Since: Jan, 2010
#191: Jun 5th 2010 at 6:27:42 AM

-Blocks with own spear, and counters with a fireball to the face-

TRULY YOUR IMBECILITY KNOWS NO BOUNDS. YOU CHALLENGE ME ON MY OWN LANDS AND HOPE TO WIN? I UNDERSTAND NOW HOW YOUR KIN WERE CHASED AWAY BY THE ENVOYS OF THE NAZARETHIAN.

SullenFrog (Elder Troper) Relationship Status: I wanna know about these strangers like me
#192: Jun 5th 2010 at 6:31:03 AM

argh! Oh, Your Spirit is as Fiery As Your Tongue, Black God. But Never, Ever Compare The Aesir To The Likes Of That Pacifist Wretch!

-channels divine lightning through both spears into Czernobog-

edited 5th Jun '10 6:31:15 AM by SullenFrog

The Danse Macabre Codex
Chabal2 Since: Jan, 2010
#193: Jun 5th 2010 at 6:41:50 AM

GRAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH

-Wrenches spear away-

MY... PEOPLE, AT LEAST, NEVER BECAME THE WILLING LAPDOGS OF A GOD WHO DEMANDS NO HUMAN SACRIFICE!!!

-Stomps Wotan's foot while backhanding him-

.

Medic: Comm... Commissar? Should we not retr-click- Commissar! We can do no good here, the dead fight each other without respite! We must fall back to-*BLAM*

-a Norseman falls-

FALL BACK?! You would suggest that a Commissar fall back from the fight he sends his men *BLAM* into??!?? *BLAM*

Not on my watch. You will tend to any wounded here, and *BLAM* we shall take a hundred of the enemy for every inch they gain!!

edited 5th Jun '10 6:42:24 AM by Chabal2

SullenFrog (Elder Troper) Relationship Status: I wanna know about these strangers like me
#194: Jun 5th 2010 at 6:47:22 AM

-retaliates by driving a mailed fist into Czernobog's gut-

Odious Cur, At Least My Followers Are Versed Enough In Their Culture To Know Who I Am Without Having To Consult A Textbook!

-launches crows from his eye socket, obscuring Czernobog's vision-

The Danse Macabre Codex
Chabal2 Since: Jan, 2010
#195: Jun 5th 2010 at 6:55:57 AM

-Swats at crows-

I HAVE NO FOLLOWERS, BECAUSE UNLIKE YOURS, THEY DIED RATHER THAN SUBMIT TO THE INVADERS, WORSHIPPING IN SHAME AND IN SECRET!! AND IN THE YEARS THAT I HAVE WAITED, I HAVE SEEN MY PEOPLE GROW STRONG!! SEE NOW, THEY SPAN HALF THE GLOBE!! WHAT HAVE YOUR NORSEMEN EVER ACCOMPLISHED?!!?

-Fireball-

Medic: Commissar, it occurs to me the Soviet doctrine may need some rewriting after this incid-click- And there are three Norsemen coming up on our right.

. *BLAM* *BLAM*

. *BLAM*

. *BLAM*

edited 5th Jun '10 6:56:13 AM by Chabal2

SullenFrog (Elder Troper) Relationship Status: I wanna know about these strangers like me
#196: Jun 5th 2010 at 7:04:20 AM

-Shoots lightning from his fingers-

Much. My Norsemen were Of The Sea; Of Course There Is Little Remaining To Show Their Greatness. But While You And Your Sons Wasted Your Time In This Frigid Land, We Ruled The Sea! We Discovered The New World, And We Have Mastered The Waves!

-stabs Gungnir into the ground and begins chanting-

bæðweg...

The Danse Macabre Codex
Chabal2 Since: Jan, 2010
#197: Jun 5th 2010 at 7:11:33 AM

YES, THEY DISCOVERED IT... AND THEN FLED WHEN THE SAVAGES WHO INHABITED IT BECAME TOO MUCH OF A NUISANCE!!! THEY FLED FROM A RABBLE!!!

-Knocks Wotan over-

AND NOW YOU RESORT TO YOUR MAGICKS, WHICH EVEN YOUR OWN PEOPLE DISTRUST AND HESITATE TO USE.

-Rams own spear into the ground, it disappears in black lightning-

. *BLAM* *BLAM* *BLAM*

Medic: Commissar, far from me the idea of retreating, but it occurs that none of our enemies are carrying ammunition. What will we do once we run out?

THEN WE WILL FIGHT WITH OUR FISTS!!! *BLAM*

edited 5th Jun '10 7:12:11 AM by Chabal2

Gloom Blue Eyed Matador from The Balcony Since: Mar, 2010
Blue Eyed Matador
#198: Jun 5th 2010 at 7:13:31 AM

Now, you shall all tremble before the might of my greatest creation... The Leninator! I knew saving his brain was a good idea!

-a massive robotic Lenin is teleported onto the battlefield, easily as tall as the two gods-

Atheism is a natural and inseparable part of Marxism, of the theory and practice of scientific socialism.

-the robot blasts red Eye Beams at Wotan-

Formerly known as Dave IX, even more formerly known as Wretchkin.
Chabal2 Since: Jan, 2010
#199: Jun 5th 2010 at 7:14:55 AM

HAH!! See, the battle is now surely won, Lenin himself comes to our aid!

(for future reference, they're all skyscraper size)

edited 5th Jun '10 7:15:15 AM by Chabal2

SullenFrog (Elder Troper) Relationship Status: I wanna know about these strangers like me
#200: Jun 5th 2010 at 7:24:56 AM

-still chanting as he gets back up, decks the Leninator with a solid punch to the face-

brimflód...brymm...éar...

-the sound of roaring rapids can be heard in the distance-

edited 5th Jun '10 7:25:21 AM by SullenFrog

The Danse Macabre Codex

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