Gallant and Goofus

Goofus flew nearly half a football field when he went through the windshield.

Gallant occasionally pigs out on junk food or unhealthy stuff, but mostly tries to maintain a balanced diet.

Edited by Starbug on Mar 5th 2019 at 12:02:52 PM

Goofus has bankrupted several buffets.

Gallant always has tissues on hand for his runny nose.

goofus uses the tissues for other matters

Galiant cares for the rights of all people, no matter what, as long as they aren't hurting people.

Goofus cares for the rights of all people, as long as they are hurting other people.

Gallant hands out free cookies and hugs at conventions.

Goofus hands out expensive drugs at conventions, and if you don't buy them he'll stab you.

Gallant donates to charity regularly.

Goofus steals from charities every millisecond.

Gallant uses proper capitalization.

goofus dont use no caps or punctuation or proper grammar andoften omits spacesbetween words

Gallant avoids the darker content on the internet.

Goofus goes on the Dark Web specifically to seek out sites like red rooms or hitmen-hiring websites. Or hell, maybe... those websites that I'm not allowed to mention on-forum.

Gallant accepts constructive criticism.

Edited by MvflG on Mar 5th 2019 at 11:17:06 PM

Goofus hunts down and murders the mother, father, wife, grandmother, and dog of anyone who criticises him.

Gallant never eats Hawaiian pizza.

Goofus always eats lead.

Gallant never jaywalks.

Goofus is wanted in 35 states as a serial jaywalker.

Gallant is the second most popular hero, but doesn't get worked up about it.

Goofus was the third until it came out he was trying to murder Gallant out of envy.

Gallant knows not to touch the red-hot stove.

goofus has a loving, consensual relationship with the stove and they've had 3 kids together.

gallant likes anime, but doesn't shove it down other people's throat, supports franchises he likes, and talks about it casually with other people with similar interests.

Goofus is the reason TV Tropes created P5. He wouldn't shut up about...certain anime we can no longer discuss here.

Gallant is a Dynamic Character.

Goofus makes every other character revert in their development when talking with him.

Gallant is a Hunter of Monsters, but carefully keeps himself from being corrupted by his mission and maintains friendship with those who do not oppress or victimize humans.

Goofus kills everyone, human ormonster.

Gallant is a member of P5, and doesn't use it to ban works he doesn't like.

Goofus purges works that have bikinis at most, even those that are G-rated.

Gallant waits patiently for a highly anticipated work to be released in his country.

Goofus flies to where the work has already been released, buys a whackload of copies, and takes them home to sell on the black market at three times the price.

Gallant runs an award-winning homework help website.

Goofus runs a popular cheating website, then disappears with the money when it turns out his answers for an important standardized test were wrong.

Gallant catches the midnight showing of the biggest movie if the year.

Goofus crashes the midnight showing of the biggest movie of the year.

Gallant always has a plan for when things go wrong.

Goofus is the reason things always go wrong.

Gallant offers his coat to his girlfriend on cold days.

Goofus holds his girlfriend at gunpoint to force everyone else to give their coats to him.

Gallant is patient and helpful with pick-up groups in an MMO.

Goofus hacked the game code to allow him to kill other PC's without provocation, which he does at every available opportunity. The admins would ban him, but he also hacked himself admin privileges and banned all of them first.

Gallant's garden consists entirely of native wildflowers, with special emphasis on butterfly host plants.

Goofus has flytraps in his garden, and bug zappers... Goofus is kinda stupid.

Gallant never nags visitors to his site to disable adblock, he knows that some people have slow internet, and ads just slow everything down to the point where you can't do anything.

On Goofus' website, everywhere you click (not just every link, but anywhere on the page) produces an unblockable porn popup. Closing the browser window? Every popup you just clicked is duplicated.

Gallant supports his local library by hosting read-in events after school.

Edited by WillyFourEyes on Mar 28th 2019 at 6:41:48 AM