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Dumb things you used to believe as a kid

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burinnu Tell me something happy from Someplace Since: Jan, 2001 Relationship Status: I won't say I'm in love
Tell me something happy
#251: Dec 11th 2010 at 5:23:54 PM

I thought that 11 x 10 was 102. I misheard it on the Schoolhouse Rock cassette tape, OK?

Also, a slightly less funny one: I used to think that the Nazis were fictional. See, I connected them with The Sound Of Music, and I knew that stuff that's true in movies isn't ALWAYS true in real life. Needless to say, when I found out that Hitler was a real historical figure, and that the events of the movie, war and escape included, were REAL, I didn't react well.

I'm in your fanfiction, correcting your spelling.
Zizoz Since: Feb, 2010
#252: Dec 11th 2010 at 5:25:17 PM

Vorpy: If you believed people didn't poop food out, what did you think poop was?

Lazarus Almost hobo from anywhere Since: Nov, 2009
Almost hobo
#253: Dec 13th 2010 at 7:38:47 AM

I believed "blowing the balloon" (translated from Portuguese, means taking a breathalyzer test) meant you would literally fill up a balloon, and then the cops would smell the air inside to find alcohol.

I also believed gypsies where born as adults, because there was an adult literacy program for the gypsy community at my school, and we thought that being on the same grade meant they were around our age.

After listening to the dicks, pussies and assholes monologue in Team America, I could think about one thing only: "You are what you eat."
MikeK Since: Jan, 2001
#254: Dec 13th 2010 at 7:49:20 AM

This kind of more cute/sad, but I remember when my first dog died, I saw what I thought was a sheltland-sheepdog-shaped cloud in the sky and thought that was him sailing off to doggie heaven. This was pre-The Lion King by the way.

edited 13th Dec '10 7:49:39 AM by MikeK

FrodoGoofballCoTV from Colorado, USA Since: Jan, 2001
#255: Dec 13th 2010 at 8:27:07 AM

  • The signal for car ignition passes though the seat belts. Because mom said "I can't start the car until everyone has their seatbelts on".
  • The world used to be Black and White. You can see the moment it changed because the 1939 version of The Wonderful Wizard Of Oz was being filmed when it happened.

frog753 Non-Action Guy from CT and/or MA Since: Jul, 2009
#256: Dec 13th 2010 at 8:40:06 AM

[up]About the black and white thing...there was a Calvin and Hobbes strip just like that, one of the ones where his dad, not knowing how to explain the truth to him, as usual makes up a ridiculous lie about the world being black and white in the old days.

Flora Segunda | World Made By Hand | Monster Blood Tattoo ^You should read these series.
AlirozTheConfused Bibliophile. from Daz Huat! Since: May, 2010
Bibliophile.
#257: Dec 13th 2010 at 11:00:13 AM

I thought that microwave ovens were called Curie Boxes, because they work with Microwave Radiation (in my young mind Curie = Radiation), and they "cure" the food by heating it.

I also thought that all radiation was dangerous, and that since sunlight is radiation, that if you spent too long in the sun you would die from radiation poisoning.

Never be without a Hat! Hot means heat. I don't care if your usage dates to 1300, it's my word, not yours. My Pm box is open.
JewelyJ from A state in the USA Since: Jul, 2009
#258: Dec 13th 2010 at 11:07:37 AM

Oh I forgot.

I always used to mix up Leonardo Di Vinci and Leonardo Di Caprio when I was young. People would go on about how hot Leo Di Caprio is and I'm like "wasn't he that old guy that invented a bunch of stuff. ooooookay"

edited 13th Dec '10 11:07:50 AM by JewelyJ

TobiasDrake (•̀⤙•́) (Edited uphill both ways) Relationship Status: Arm chopping is not a love language!
(•̀⤙•́)
#259: Dec 14th 2010 at 11:20:40 AM

After a failed attempt at explaining how the microwave works and why you shouldn't stare at it as a kid, for years I believed that if you looked in the window while it was cooking, your head would explode.

My Tumblr. Currently side-by-side liveblogging Digimon Adventure, sub vs dub.
Firestarter Sorceress Bookwench from over the rainbow Since: Jun, 2010 Relationship Status: With my statistically significant other
Sorceress Bookwench
#260: Dec 14th 2010 at 12:46:09 PM

I thought that every kid had their own tooth fairy, and that teeth were used as fairy currency. I also thought that they and all the other fairies lived in my back garden and used flowers for houses.

I thought my basement was haunted by a dead little girl named Abagail, and that my friend was possesed by her.

Also, I thought baby's came from my moms belly-button.

Everything happens for a reason. The reason is a chaotic intersection of chance and the laws of physics.
wuggles (4 Score & 7 Years Ago)
#261: Dec 14th 2010 at 3:26:13 PM

I thought that boys peed out of their belly button.

I also thought that anyone with the last name Jackson was related to Michael Jackson.

mrjeff Since: Dec, 1969
#262: Dec 14th 2010 at 10:19:28 PM

That a vagina was a woman's penis.

AJesterOnly Since: Jan, 2010
#263: Dec 16th 2010 at 9:37:48 AM

I used to think that when we'd be on the interstate going to, say, a theme park an hour away, that ALL the people on that interstate would be going to the EXACT same place as me.

Cue me as a seven year old in the back of the car in dense traffic, thinking, "Shit. The park's going to be PACKED today."

SpainSun Laugh it off, everybody from Somewhere Beyond Here Since: Jan, 2010
Laugh it off, everybody
#264: Dec 16th 2010 at 1:45:52 PM

I used to think that "draw" was pronounced "drall". I never really made the connection between the two, and thought that "dralling" was one of those adult things I'd undertstand when I was older.

I spread my wings and I learn how to fly....
OOZE Don't feed the plants! from Transsexual,Transylvania Since: Dec, 1969
Don't feed the plants!
#265: Dec 16th 2010 at 9:47:19 PM

I used to think that strangers were all PETA-files (members of People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals). They all wore tuxedoes, and lure children into vans and limosines so that they can be brainwashed into Animal Wrongs Group activists.

I'm feeling strangely happy now, contented and serene. Oh don't you see, finally I'll be, somewhere that's green...
lockonlockon Game Master from In a dream Since: Jan, 2001
Game Master
#266: Dec 17th 2010 at 5:40:30 AM

That is amazing.

I give you an award, sir.

TVTropes Nuzlocke Thread. - Arceus Help Us All.
BobbyG vigilantly taxonomish from England Since: Jan, 2001
vigilantly taxonomish
#267: Dec 17th 2010 at 12:42:22 PM

I thought that everybody had their own unique name and that no two people would have the same combination of forename and surname, otherwise why would we have surnames?

For a ludicrously long time I lived in fear of horror movies because I knew that some films that weren't horror were scary enough, and that horror could scare even adults, so I started to assume they involved some kind of unimaginable terror that made me scared of even the risk of seeing one. When I finally did see one it was rather anticlimactic.

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Daionusthe23rd Since: Dec, 1969
#268: Dec 17th 2010 at 12:48:50 PM

[up] Same, but was too much of a pussy to actually bother watching it.

ImipolexG frozen in time from all our yesterdays Since: Jan, 2001
frozen in time
#269: Dec 17th 2010 at 1:25:19 PM

I used to think that horror movies all contained the most incredible, over-the-top gruesomeness possible, totally unfit for human eyes. Which is seldom, if ever, true. The need to get an R rating, for one thing, tends to cut back on the horribleness.

no one will notice that I changed this
GlennMagusHarvey Since: Jan, 2001
#270: Dec 17th 2010 at 1:28:10 PM

That genetic material is passed through kissing, and that printing my own money could make me rich.

MrAHR Ahr river from ಠ_ಠ Since: Oct, 2010 Relationship Status: A cockroach, nothing can kill it.
Ahr river
#271: Dec 17th 2010 at 1:28:52 PM

I didn't know you could curse in R rated movies for the longest time. Like, last year, when I saw a clip of Reservoir Dogs, and I was like "YOU CAN SAY THE WORD FUCK ALL YOU WANT IN AN R RATED MOVIE?!?!?!"

Read my stories!
lockonlockon Game Master from In a dream Since: Jan, 2001
Game Master
#272: Dec 17th 2010 at 2:01:13 PM

[up] okay, that's pretty rich.[lol]

TVTropes Nuzlocke Thread. - Arceus Help Us All.
snailbait bitchy queen from psych ward Since: Jul, 2010
bitchy queen
#273: Dec 17th 2010 at 2:32:52 PM

I thought a blow job was putting your penis in front of a fan. I'm glad I never tried it.

"Without a fairy, you're not even a real man!" ~ Mido from Ocarina of Time
wuggles (4 Score & 7 Years Ago)
#274: Dec 17th 2010 at 6:19:15 PM

I have more stuff. I thought nobody actually lived in famous cities. Like LA, or Hollywood, or Paris. I really thought actors just went there and went home somewhere else. I thought the same thing about common vacation places like Bermuda and Puerto Rico.

AlirozTheConfused Bibliophile. from Daz Huat! Since: May, 2010
Bibliophile.
#275: Dec 18th 2010 at 4:10:38 PM

I thought that things didn't ever grow. I believed that the big trees were the new ones, and the sprouts were the old ones. I thought that everything had to degrade and get worse over time, and that because of this, the future HAD to be worse than the present and past.

I also believed that people weren't entitled to their own definition of words.

I was a stupid, stupid, Rat Creature kid.

Never be without a Hat! Hot means heat. I don't care if your usage dates to 1300, it's my word, not yours. My Pm box is open.

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