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Dumb things you used to believe as a kid

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ARandomSerf Since: Dec, 1969
#226: Dec 8th 2010 at 5:20:45 AM

I thought that the man was in danger of urinating inside the woman during sex, which made the whole activity seem quite unpleasant.

Harkening back to the seven/several issue, I didn't equate the two words, but I did consider seven to be the cutoff point between "a few" (3-6) and "several" (7-12). I still do, kinda.

Not a belief, exactly, but the phrase "you can't have your cake and eat it, too" made no sense to me for a while because I automatically translated having cake as eating it.

I thought that if I ran quickly enough I could get a Wheel o' Feet.

I thought that every irregular shape around the pelvic area counted as a butt.

Myrmidon The Ant King from In Antartica Since: Nov, 2009
The Ant King
#227: Dec 8th 2010 at 5:49:52 AM

I thought the three wise men and the three kings that attended Jesus's birth were two separate groups.

Kill all math nerds
SpainSun Laugh it off, everybody from Somewhere Beyond Here Since: Jan, 2010
Laugh it off, everybody
#228: Dec 8th 2010 at 5:54:37 AM

Ninjas and Pirates were species distinct from the human race.

My stepdad had a lot to do with that one.

I also came up with the idea of a Pirate Ninja, who I named Suzuki Blackbeard.

I spread my wings and I learn how to fly....
MrAHR Ahr river from ಠ_ಠ Since: Oct, 2010 Relationship Status: A cockroach, nothing can kill it.
toiletbomber 納豆 post-processor from Nowhere in Everywhere Since: Jun, 2010
納豆 post-processor
#230: Dec 8th 2010 at 6:16:05 AM

I had this belief that every myth about ninja was real and ninjas still existed.

Zizoz Since: Feb, 2010
#231: Dec 8th 2010 at 6:43:25 AM

Not a belief, exactly, but the phrase "you can't have your cake and eat it, too" made no sense to me for a while because I automatically translated having cake as eating it.

Me too. Still bugs me.

edited 8th Dec '10 6:43:49 AM by Zizoz

Myrmidon The Ant King from In Antartica Since: Nov, 2009
The Ant King
#232: Dec 8th 2010 at 6:53:07 AM

@Myrm: Wait...WHAT
Yeah, the three wise men/magi is just another name for the three kings.

Kill all math nerds
frog753 Non-Action Guy from CT and/or MA Since: Jul, 2009
#233: Dec 8th 2010 at 7:39:20 AM

Surprisingly late in elementary school (fifth or sixth grade, I think), I found myself greatly deluded after I saw a wheatgrass juicer in a catalog. I came to believe that you could get some sort of juice out of ordinary grass by grinding it with rocks. My friends and I tried it as part of our little back-to-nature-at-recess endeavor that we informally called "the Neanderthal Project". Of course, we got nothing...

On the other hand, we were quite prolific at cracking acorns and taking out and storing the insides...

Flora Segunda | World Made By Hand | Monster Blood Tattoo ^You should read these series.
mrsaturn Youkai Serious Since: Jan, 2001
Youkai Serious
#234: Dec 8th 2010 at 10:49:00 AM

Watching PBS as a child, I wondered who this "Viewers Like You" person was, and how he could afford to keep all these shows running at once.

They assed first. I am only retaliating in an ass way. -The Dead Man's Life
lockonlockon Game Master from In a dream Since: Jan, 2001
Game Master
#235: Dec 8th 2010 at 4:19:14 PM

@toiletbomber: Can you prove they don't?

TVTropes Nuzlocke Thread. - Arceus Help Us All.
Stormtroper from Little Venice Since: Apr, 2009 Relationship Status: I-It's not like I like you, or anything!
#236: Dec 8th 2010 at 5:05:35 PM

I don't recall thinking that television was real, but I had no concept of special effects for some reason, so if a character had to die in a film, the producers would hire a suicidal person to play it.

I also thought the cats having nine lives thing was true, that if they were going to die, they would luck out and live, even if it was a certain death, a total of 8 times. I also thought this applied to every animal but with a different number of lives, humans had three lives because of the Rule of Three, and that this was the reason I had survived choking on food.

Also, I didn't believe, but seriously considered the idea that inside a TV there were ants holding signs to make the image show, and move blindingly fast and change signs a number of times per second in order to make it look like it's animated.

And that's how I ended up in the wardrobe. It Just Bugs Me!
Rottweiler Dog and Pony Show from Portland, Oregon Since: Dec, 2009
Dog and Pony Show
#237: Dec 8th 2010 at 5:12:36 PM

ignore

edited 8th Dec '10 5:13:02 PM by Rottweiler

“Love is the eternal law whereby the universe was created and is ruled.” — St. Bernard
Zizoz Since: Feb, 2010
#238: Dec 9th 2010 at 6:32:23 PM

The ants thing reminds me of Hex.

edited 9th Dec '10 6:32:29 PM by Zizoz

BobbyG vigilantly taxonomish from England Since: Jan, 2001
vigilantly taxonomish
#239: Dec 9th 2010 at 6:41:19 PM

At one point, I thought John Major was some important guy that everybody seemed to know. Which was true in a fashion, of course, but I didn't realise they didn't all know him personally because I didn't have any conception of politics or fame back then. That was when I was very young; one of the earliest things I can remember.

Not really a belief, but at one point I imagined that adults and children might be different species, and that when they fed us they were fattening us up so they could eat us, and that scared me so much that I was scared of going to sleep for a while. I knew it wasn't true, or I thought it wasn't, but the possibility was frightening.

edited 9th Dec '10 6:43:03 PM by BobbyG

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MrAHR Ahr river from ಠ_ಠ Since: Oct, 2010 Relationship Status: A cockroach, nothing can kill it.
Ahr river
#240: Dec 10th 2010 at 3:03:38 AM

I thought knowledge sucking aliens was the only logical reason as to why we went from the roman empire to the dark ages.

Read my stories!
RocketScience Not dead yet. from a dark place Since: Jan, 2001
Not dead yet.
#241: Dec 10th 2010 at 3:14:48 AM

I thought that once you finished seventh grade, you were done with school forever. (keep in mind where I live)

edited 10th Dec '10 3:14:59 AM by RocketScience

MrAHR Ahr river from ಠ_ಠ Since: Oct, 2010 Relationship Status: A cockroach, nothing can kill it.
Ahr river
#242: Dec 10th 2010 at 3:16:51 AM

I thought that since from kindergarten to first grade, you stayed in school longer, that every year you would stay at school longer and longer and longer.

Read my stories!
Daionusthe23rd Since: Dec, 1969
#243: Dec 10th 2010 at 10:52:17 AM

I used to try to not sleep on the last day of summer thinking that summer wouldn't end if I stayed up.

owlsayshoot Chimerical idealist from A hole in a tree Since: Nov, 2010
Chimerical idealist
#244: Dec 10th 2010 at 12:36:52 PM

I use to force ants onto moss I pulled up. I figured it was like a grassy field and they'd enjoy the grassy fields.

KingTyrantLizard E is for Extinction! from Pfft, like I would tell. Since: Nov, 2010
E is for Extinction!
#245: Dec 10th 2010 at 3:08:56 PM

So, just out of curiosity, how many "lol jesus" responses have there been? Other than over 9000, I mean.

Personally, I'm more interested in the things humanity used to believe in on the whole. You know that in the early 19th century it was believed that wild animals didn't mate? That, for instance, frogs spontaneously emerged from mud? That just fascinated me in how ridiculous it is - and how ridiculously simple it would be to disprove (grab a bunch of frogs, isolate them until orgy happens).

Grr. Argh.
SpainSun Laugh it off, everybody from Somewhere Beyond Here Since: Jan, 2010
Laugh it off, everybody
#246: Dec 10th 2010 at 3:28:12 PM

So, just out of curiosity, how many "lol jesus" responses have there been? Other than over 9000, I mean.

Before you mentioned it just now? Zero.

I spread my wings and I learn how to fly....
Jumpingzombie Since: Jan, 2001
#247: Dec 10th 2010 at 3:30:43 PM

^^What. You might be in the wrong thread.

Watching PBS as a child, I wondered who this "Viewers Like You" person was, and how he could afford to keep all these shows running at once.
aww, that's golden. :) I sort of grasped the "Viewers Like You" concept, except, I thought my mom was the ones giving money to the shows but used my name and gave me the credit while doing so.

Oh yeah, along with thinking urine was spoiled orange juice, for some reason, I thought scrambled eggs and orange juice were the same thing. I used to eat them both together for breakfast so one couldn't exist without the other.

Zizoz Since: Feb, 2010
#248: Dec 10th 2010 at 4:02:04 PM

Huh, surprised I haven't posted this here yet: I used to think my parents knew someone named Miss Elaineous, since they often sorted things into the «miscellaneous» file.

Stormtroper from Little Venice Since: Apr, 2009 Relationship Status: I-It's not like I like you, or anything!
#249: Dec 11th 2010 at 3:36:24 PM

We used to have these things at home. I used to believe these were supposed to represent an elephant. The mental image remained for quite some time.

And that's how I ended up in the wardrobe. It Just Bugs Me!
Vorpy Unstoppable Sex Goddess from from from from from from from from from Since: Dec, 2010 Relationship Status: Two-timing
Unstoppable Sex Goddess
#250: Dec 11th 2010 at 4:21:24 PM

I used to think that you didn't poop food out, and it just filled up inside of you like putting money in a piggy bank. Eventually after eating so much you cant anymore and you die.

I also thought that December was when the world ended and you die.

I also thought that Judgment Day was real after watching Terminator 2 and tried to convince everyone in my kindergarten class to fight the machines and that if we didn't they were going to kill us all and step on our heads. Everyone freaked out and cried.

I also thought The Relic was real, and that the Kothoga would find me and guillotine my head.

I also thought that if you reach into the toilet far enough you could grab somebody's butt.

I also thought babies came from eggs.

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