This thread is for tropers who have trouble with English and would like some help with the crazy grammar of this crazy language.
Write down what you wish to edit on the wiki. If you have been suspended from editing, another troper might be kind enough to edit for you after your suggestions have been corrected.
The thread is for help and feedback on your own suggested edits.
If you want help correcting other people's edits (e.g., if you find a page which seems to have grammar problems but want a second opinion, or you don't feel able to fix it by yourself) then that's off-topic here, but we have a separate Grammar Police cleanup thread
that can provide assistance.
Edited by Mrph1 on Nov 16th 2023 at 5:37:57 PM
- Funny Moments: One of the commercials
for the game involves Cal Kestis's actor, Cameron Monaghan, getting Jedi training from Mark Hamill, aka Luke Skywalker. One moment involves Cameron mocapping the Dual Wield stance.
Mark: Hold it. You get two lightsabers?
Cameron: Technically one, but I can split 'em.
Mark: Nobody gave me two lightsabers.
Folder->Dwight McClusky
- Revenge Before Reason: When the Knoxes are cornered in the shower, his own guards tell him to stop fucking around with them. Far as he's concerned, they're the reason the riot happened and will make sure they die.
Sparky: Dwight, for Christ's sake, the fucking joint's exploding and you're diddling around with these pukes. We have more important things to do.
McClusky: These two, these are the ones that die today. You hear me, Sparky? I'll wipe that fucking scum off the face of the fucking Earth if it's the last fucking thing I do!
Folder->Film Live Action
- In Natural Born Killers, when Warden Dwight McClusky is giving Jack Scagnetti a tour of the prison where Mickey and Mallory Knox are being held, Dwight warns that the one thing it shouldn't be in a supermax prison is dead quiet.
Edited by kawaiineko333 on Apr 30th 2023 at 10:06:35 AM
Page 966 @Melinda
The score didn't depart the franchise...
^ This is not correct English. A musical score can't "depart" a film franchise the way (for example) a person departs a train station.
^ Did you mean to write "The score continued to be used in the franchise..."?
Jaina wandering into an area of the city with booby traps and security cameras...returns them to their mother without any trouble.
In one scene, as part of a plot to commit murder, ominous State Sec official...listing everyone in the loop...
Edited by Arivne on Apr 30th 2023 at 7:13:00 AM
@jOSEFdelaville
...(albeit <- no comma with...Sigma, <- comma which...
...app store. <- period This includes the phone-exclusive extensions Grow...
^ The first sentence was a run-on sentence
connected together by a comma splice
.
Grow Cube Omega, <- comma which...possible object interactions...launched in a random...possibly its color...that interacts with...Eventually, <- comma the...color as the...at max level. The...songs), <- comma which...
Grow RPG Sigma, <- comma which...modifications, <- comma including...item at max level, different...songs), <- comma which...
Edited by Arivne on Apr 30th 2023 at 7:24:21 AM
@kawaiineko333
When the Knoxes are cornered in the shower, Dwight's own guards tell him to stop fucking around with them. As far as he's concerned, they're the reason the riot happened and he will make sure they die.
^ You talk about the Knoxes but then write "he". It isn't clear within the sentence who "he" refers to.
Edited by Arivne on Apr 30th 2023 at 7:29:23 AM
- Disney's general animation style for both 2D and 3D has always been contested amongst both fans and animators. While some love the look of Disney's films and regard them to be some of the most beautiful in the entire animation industry, many others have criticized Disney films for looking overly "samey" and "generic" between films, and wish the studio would experiment more with their art style and try out new forms of animation instead of sticking to their core art style.
VideoGame.Resident Evil Village
- Eternal Engine: Heisenberg, the fourth and last of the Village Lords Ethan has to fight to get his daughter Rose back, is an engineer and a metallurgist so naturally his lair would be a factory where he would produce various weapons and items such as tanks and Super Soldiers.
Thanks
@ Cheating Death: Those That Lived
- Lammy has a strong fanbase for her impressive Hunter Trapper skills that win her the Games without ever having to see any of her victims face-to-face, as well as her status as one of the youngest victors, and one half of a Star-Crossed Lovers couple with Spool.
- Stage Magician Tabbock Summers may be the Token Evil Teammate of the District 9 victors, but his Refuge in Audacity tactics and Evil Is Hammy personality make him more memorable than some of his more prominent peers.
@ Cheating Death: Those That Lived
- In Beetee's chapter:
- A District 7 sponsor fondly recalls a night of partying with Percussive Pickpocket Jack and then wonders what happened to her wallet.
- There is a Running Gag about the gambler who favors District 9 stuffing himself with bread too much to pay attention to anything else in Beetee's chapter.
- District 10's sponsor keeps hoping that the tributes will be furries like him.
- The sadistic Tabbock gets a Crosses the Line Twice moment when he turns one of his victims into a Dead Guy Puppet (or rather unconscious guy puppet).
Tabbock: What's your name, son? ''Tabbock: (using ventriloquism to make it sound like his victim is talking): I'm District 10 male.Tabbock: (back in his normal voice): What a name only a mother could love. Would you like to fly?Tabbock (using ventriloquism to sound like the other tribute again): Oh yes sir, yes please.
- Caesar "interviewing" Ardendellian's imaginary friend after her stage-fright makes her refuse to do the interview herself.
- In a Guardians of the Galaxy Shout-Out, a tribute named Groot is too scared to say anything besides his own name.
- Pasture is just as much of a Large Ham while mentoring Skinner as she was in her own Games, while also showing a bit more of a snarky side. She gives reporters who interview her nicknames like "man-of-much-ego" and "man of much pink hair and little in the upstairs", and goes off on the occasional silly tangent like how the feast was the "Worst feast ever" due to not having any meat.
Edited by Melinda on Apr 30th 2023 at 1:44:17 AM
@ Melinda
Cheating Death: Those That Lived
- Lammy has a strong fanbase for her impressive Hunter Trapper skills that win her the Games without ever having to see any of her victims face-to-face, as well as her status as one of the youngest victors, and one half of a Star-Crossed Lovers couple with Spool.
Cheating Death: Those That Lived
- The sadistic Tabbock gets a Crosses the Line Twice moment when he turns one of his victims into a Dead Guy Puppet (or rather unconscious guy puppet).
- Caesar "interviewing" Ardendellian's imaginary friend after her stage-fright makes her refuse to do the interview herself.
- Pasture is just as much of a Large Ham while mentoring Skinner as she was in her own Games, while also showing a bit more of a snarky side. She gives reporters who interview her nicknames like "man-of-much-ego" and "man of much pink hair and little in the upstairs", and goes off on the occasional silly tangent like how the feast was the "[w]orst feast ever" due to not having any meat.
- The Battle of Nar Shadda in the climax of The Hutt Gambit is one of the cornerstones of the trilogy, gets a lot of buildup, and spends time talking about how the ragtag smuggler fleet is invested in protecting the millions of people (refugees, immigrant communities with many families, street kids who grew up there, etc.) who have no way to evacuate before the Empire's planned razing of the moon. In New Jedi Order, the Yuuzhan Vong launch a more successful attack on Nar Shadda that certainly kills many of those same people Han and his friends were defending.
- The Hand of Judgment Vigilante Militia (fleshed out stormtrooper deserters who remain loyal to the Empire, but resent its attrocities and act independently to protect victimized Outer Rim citizens) only appear in Star Wars: Allegiance and Choices of One, two of the lesser known and important Timothy Zahn books, but to some fans, they're just as engaging and powerful as anyone from The Thrawn Trilogy.
@ We Must Be Killers Series Continuity Error:
- Fixed to the Star is one of the earliest stories and has a lot of important characters and plot points that affect the rest of the series, but it has many continuite issues about the past victors.
- Districts 3, 8, 9, and 10, all only have two victors (their Quell tributes) in that story while later works like The End is the Beginning is the End: The Quarter Quell establish that each of those districts has at least one additional living victor during the Quell who is older than Claudius (Mauve Shirts Lumina, Diana, Cora, and Angus).
- The only living female District 1 victors for Claudius to meet in Fixed to a Star are Cashmere and an old woman named Precious, while other works like Bring us Together, Ambrosia, and The District Upside Down: The War feature several other living District 1 female victors older than Claudius.
- One scene in the Fix Fic says avails is the first Victor Ronan ever mentored but another says Luna is.
- Fixed to the Star is one of the earliest stories and has a lot of important characters and plot points that affect the rest of the series, but it has many continuite issues about the past victors.
- Beneath the Mask:
- Most of the District 2 victors put on masks of being happy or indifferent about their many kills as long as it entertains their revered Capitol and keeps their kids safe, but many have occasional pangs of conscience when the world isn't watching.
- Brutus's first victor Emory is seen as one of the most firmly loyal tributes, and when Misha thinks that she'd rather Lyme be a Rebel than dead in Shadows Fall (despite her dislike of the Rebellion), she feels certain that the inverse is true for Emory after Brutus died in the Quell. However, Lorata has said Misha is wrong, and Emory is indeed willing to fight the Capitol without much fuss after accepting their betrayal of District 2's victors in the Fix Fic Grand Finale.
- Cloudcuckoolander's Minder: Despite being District 6's youngest victor until a few years before the 3rd Quarter Quell, Phillips acts as their spokesperson, primary mentor, and babysitter for the other victors due to being the only one of the three older District 6 victors who never uses drugs. He has been doing this since his teens, when he came out of the arena due to managing an Improbable Weapon User kill with the glitter and rolling pin his drugged-up mentor sent him as sponsor gifts.
- Hypocrite: In Follow the Leader, Joseph Seward coldly takes part in the brutal execution of a presumptive volunteer who lost his nerve during the reaping and let an untrained younger boy become the tribute, while making excuses about how he didn't volunteer either (and without much more of a reason) despite being the next-highest ranked trainee in the class of potential volunteers.
- Ms. Fanservice: Callista, the most voluptuous District 2 Victor, is often noted as wearing something like a short evening gown, low cut sweater or (during one particularly hot Christmas season) nothing but ribbons.
- Retired Badass: The oldest victors (Ronan, Odin, Caius, Hera, Adessa, and Luna) won just as brutal games as their younger counterparts and do well during the mistletoe fighting competitio,n but rarely deliberately seek fights anymore and enjoy quiet pastimes like gardening and going on walks with dogs.
- Sibling Rivalry: Lyme and Enobaria view themselves as sisters due to having the same mentor (Nero) and having spent much of their lives away from their biological families. They also have wildly different temperaments and each resents any attention Nero gives the other.
- Tampering with Food and Drink:
- As a show of dominance President Snow enjoys serving Ronan poisoned cookies and biscuits that Ronan has to vomit up afterward on most of the occasions he invites him over for a game of chess or a political chat.
- Callista tampers with the food of people who get plastic surgery to resemble her dead tributes to make them temporarily impotent or nauseous.
@ Proposal Thread
- Dark Lord—The Rise of Darth Vader: Cash Garrulan is a Black Sun vigo who has long operated with the tacit approval of the Jedi and the Republic in exchange for giving them information and staying out of any criminal operations more detestable than gunrunning. He is a prolific and dutiful informant, vainly trying to warn the Republic about Count Dooku's military buildup well before the Clone Wars, and has a friendly relationship with Roan Shryne, his Jedi handler, but also pays off the Separatists to operate in their territory. After Order 66, Cash is one of the few Outer Rim citizens who believe that Palpatine is scapegoating the Jedi for his own actions. This knowledge, the Empire's tough stance on gangsters, the promise of future favors from Roan, and their past friendship cause Cash to agree to work against the Empire. He remains calm and cunning while being interrogated by Vader, has unwitting Separatist mercenaries be decoys to divert Vader away from Roan and his honorary Padawan, and temporarily gets both himself and Roan out of the Empire's reach with a calculating piece of misdirection during a ship chase.
Edited by Melinda on May 1st 2023 at 8:08:01 AM
Folder->Web Animation
- In hololive, Momosuzu Nene of Japan Generation 5 catches and raises different species of beetles and has a separate Twitter account
to show their growth cycles.
For The Problem with Licensed Games
Folder ->Toys
- Polly Pocket: Super Splash Island is a very basic Minigame Game with mostly timed games, several of them (such as the Jet Boats level with slippery controls and slippery and bouncy opponents.) quite hard for the demographic of young girls.note And that's topped off with repetitive and annoying music that sounds like it was rejected from Donkey Kong Country, a waterslide climax that requires at least 2000 tickets (sometimes requiring multiple plays of minigames), overly shaded sprites with 5 pixel faces, the lack of Polly's other friends (outside of the opening where Todd and Lila make cameos, although in the Water Blaster level there's palette swaps of Polly's friends), and the very basic gameplay that doesn't even have a winner screen (You can finish it in under 45 minutes!). On the bright side, there's a very nice (if not very limited) outfit selection, and somewhat decent graphics. Interestingly, this game was released 6 months before Polly Pocket: Lunar Eclipse first came out, which also has a lengthy scene with a waterpark.
Edited by WESTERNANIMATIONFAN96 on Apr 30th 2023 at 9:53:13 AM
For Viler New Villain Anime And Manga:
- The Kindaichi Case Files: Yoichi Takato, the series Arch-Enemy, is The Chessmaster and Affably Evil magician criminal who gives Faustian offers to people who are mostly wronged or suffered by the hands of Asshole Victims. He still has likable points such as having a few Pet the Dog moments and temporarily cooperating with Hajime Kindaichi to solve cases. While his primary motive is to non-lethally defeat Hajime by achieving The Perfect Crime (especially murder), his secondary motive is to give his clients justice via murderous revengeHowever... . In the "37 Years Old" Time Skip Sequel Series, the Serial Killer Twenty Faces in "The Killer with Twenty Faces Murder Case" is capable to disguise as someone else (similar to Gentleman Thief, but specialized in murder) and their motive of serial murders is petty and genuinely unsympathetic: the victims see and know Twenty Faces' true identity. To make it worse, Twenty Faces escaped scot-free and succeeded in killing Shidou Akamine (the remaining target) in the last scene of the epilogue, although Hajime manages to discover them as the culprit. This is a hint that someday, Hajime have to confront Twenty Faces in future cases.
Edited by Minorica on May 3rd 2023 at 1:02:13 AM
"No matter how bad the heroes can get or how bad the situation is, we're sure we can overcome it and get our happy endings..."- What If Anakin Obi Wan And Padme Were KILLED On Geonosis: After learning of Anakin’s death, Palpatine tortured Dooku with the Force Ligthning before changing his plans. Using Jedi’s poor performance at Battle of Geonosis as a justification to have them put under command of Clone generals during the Clone Wars. Palpatine has Duchess Satine assasinated and her homeworld of Mandalore almost completely destroyed by Separatists before it is saved by the Republic and neutral systems united by Satine are brought under his control. Palpatine continues to sabotage attempt at peace talks, including assasinating Yoda, Oppo Rancisis and Sahoka, framing Jedi as the war mongers and executing Order 66. Palpatine prolongs Clone Wars for five years before declarating himself Emperor and ordering Darth Maul and Savage Opress ti kill Dooku and Separatist council. He has brothers kidnap force sensitive children across the galaxy in order to turn them into Dark Side army which will hunt down threaths to his rule, taking Ezra Bridger and Mara Jade as his aprentices. After getting rid of Maul and Savage as well, Palpatine uses Transfer essence to achieve immoratality and rule galaxy forever.
@ Melinda
- The Battle of Nar Shadda in the climax of The Hutt Gambit is one of the cornerstones of the trilogy, gets a lot of buildup, and spends time talking about how the ragtag smuggler fleet is invested in protecting the millions of people (refugees, immigrant communities with many families, street kids who grew up there, etc.) who have no way to evacuate before the Empire's planned razing of the moon. In New Jedi Order, the Yuuzhan Vong launch a more successful attack on Nar Shadda that certainly kills many of those same people Han and his friends were defending.
- The Hand of Judgment Vigilante Militia (fleshed out stormtrooper deserters who remain loyal to the Empire, (comma) but resent its atrocities and act independently to protect victimized Outer Rim citizens) (closing parentheses) only appear in Star Wars: Allegiance and Choices of One, two of the lesser known and important Timothy Zahn books, but to some fans, they're just as engaging and powerful as anyone from The Thrawn Trilogy.
We Must Be Killers Series Continuity Error:
- Fixed to the Star is one of the earliest stories and has a lot of important characters and plot points that affect the rest of the series, but it has many continuity issues about the past victors. Districts 3, 8, 9, and 10, all only have two victors (their Quell tributes) in that story while later works like The End is the Beginning is the End: The Quarter Quell establish that each of those districts has at least (superfluous word - cut) one additional living victor during the Quell who is older than Claudius. (period, repeated words and unnecessary detail - cut)
- (superfluous word - cut) The only living District 1 victors for Claudius to meet in Fixed to the Star are Cashmere and an old woman named Precious, while other works like Bring us Together and The District Upside Down: The War feature several other living District 1 female victors older than Claudius.
- One scene in the Fix Fic says Avails is the first Victor Ronan ever mentored, (comma) but another says Luna is.
- Beneath the Mask:
- Most of the District 2 victors put on masks of being happy or indifferent about their many kills as long as it entertains their revered Capitol and keeps their kids safe, but many have occasional pangs of conscience when the world isn't watching.
- Brutus's first victor Emory is seen as one of the most firmly loyal tributes, and when Misha thinks that she'd rather Lyme be a Rebel than dead (despite her dislike of the Rebellion), she feels certain that the inverse is true for Emory after Brutus died in the Quell. However, Lorata has said Misha is wrong, and she is indeed willing to fight the Capitol without much fuss after accepting their betrayal of District 2's victors in the Fix Fic.
- Cloudcuckoolander's Minder: Despite being District 6's youngest victor until shortly before the 3rd Quarter Quell, Phillips acts as their spokesperson, primary mentor, and babysitter for the other victors due to being the only one who never uses drugs. He has been doing this since his teens, when he came out of the arena due to managing an Improbable Weapon User kill with the glitter and rolling pin his drugged-up mentor sent him as sponsor gifts.
- Retired Badass: The oldest victors (Tonan, Ofin, Cajuns, Hera, Adessa, and Luna) won just as brutal games as their younger counterparts and do well during the mistletoe fighting competition, (comma) but rarely deliberately seek fights anymore and enjoy quiet pastimes like gardening and going on walks with dogs.
- Tampering with Food and Drink:
- As a show of dominance President Snow enjoys serving Ronan poisoned cookies and biscuits that Ronan has to vomit up afterward (move text) on most of the occasions he invites him over for a game of chess or a political chat.
Proposal Thread
- Dark Lord—The Rise of Darth Vader: Cash Garrulan is a Black Sun vigo who has long operated with the tacit approval of the Jedi and the Republic in exchange for giving them information and staying out of any criminal operations more detestable than gunrunning. He is a prolific and dutiful informant, vainly trying to warn the Republic about Count Dooku's military buildup well before the Clone Wars, and has a friendly relationship with Roan Shryne, his Jedi handler. During the Clone Wars, he pays off the Separatists to operate in their territory, (comma) but remains trusted by Roan. After Order 66, Cash is one of the few Outer Rim citizens who believe that Palpatine is scapegoating the Jedi for his own actions. This knowledge, the Empire's tough stance on gangsters, the promise of future favors from Roan, and their past friendship cause him to agree to work against the Empire. He remains calm and cunning while being interrogated by Vader, has two unwitting (superfluous word - cut) Separatist mercenaries be decoys to divert Vader away from Roan and his honorary Padawan, and temporarily gets both himself and Roan out of the Empire's reach with a calculating piece of misdirection during a ship chase.
Edited by Clare on May 1st 2023 at 2:59:34 PM
Thanks @ The Han Solo Trilogy
- Sadistic slaver Tereonza feels constant sorrow about how the Hutts refuse to give him vacations to visit his mate (sadly admitting that if Absence Makes the Heart Go Yonder for her, he will understand), and is horrified by her death in the third book.
- Army of Thieves and Whores: The smugglers (few of whom have military training, although many have fought pirates and Navy patrollers), con artists, mercenaries, and honest traders with no combat experience who have relatives on Nar Shadda form a ragtag militia fleet that nonetheless scores some heavy blows against the invasion force seeking to raze their home.
- Big Red Button: In The Hutt Gambit, illusionist Xaverri’s biggest and most risky illusion can be turned on when she hits a large red button on her control panel which had a label in all caps saying no one but her can ever touch it.
- Men of Sherwood: The Nova Force mercenaries guarding Ylesia in the third book are simple Mooks, but they bravely and effectively fight many enemies, save Tereonza from assassins, and delay the attacking army a bit before accepting defeat and surrendering.
- Pay Evil unto Evil: Rebel Dawn has a sequence where Hutt assassins commit a series of brutal murders with all kinds of methods ranging from blasters to poison to arson to stringing sharp wire across a path a speeder will take. However, their targets are priests for the Scam Religion that had been grooming slaves for decades, so the reader is unlikely to feel much sympathy.
Edited by Melinda on May 1st 2023 at 10:16:15 AM
@kawaiineko333
In hololive, Momosuzu...
^ This is not an English error, it's putting a work name in italics as per How to Write an Example - Italicize "Long" Work Names.
...bouncy opponents <- no period) quite...least an easy/medium/hard option...level there are palette swaps...selection <- no comma and...Lunar Eclipse (which came out first), which also...
@Minorica
...who gives Faustian offers to people who are wronged or suffered by the hands of Asshole Victims. While his primary motive is to non-lethally defeat Hajime by achieving The Perfect Crime in the challenge to Hajime, his secondary motive is to give his clients justice via murderous revengeHowever... In the 37 Years Old series, the first and one of Takato's "Olympian puppets" doesn't have redeeming qualities and the motive is utterly unsympathetic. <- delete extra period In the "37 Years Old" Time Skip Sequel Series, the Serial Killer Twenty Faces in "The Killer with Twenty Faces Murder Case" is capable of disguising themselves as someone else (similar to Takato, but more depraved) and the motive for their serial murders is petty and genuinely unsympathetic: the victims see and know Twenty Faces' true identity. To make it worse, Twenty Faces escaped scot-free and succeeded in killing Shidou Akamine (the remaining target) in the last scene of the epilogue, although Hajime manages to discover them as the culprit. This is a hint that someday, Hajime will have to confront Twenty Faces in future cases.
^ If someone is "the first", you know there's only one of them.
Edited by Arivne on May 1st 2023 at 8:58:27 AM
After learning of Anakin’s death, Palpatine tortures Dooku with the Force Lightning before changing his plans <- no period and using the Jedi's poor performance in the Battle of Geonosis as a justification to have them put under command of Clone generals during the Clone Wars. Palpatine has Duchess Satine assassinated and her homeworld of Mandalore almost completely destroyed by Separatists before it is saved by the Republic and neutral systems united by Satine are brought under his control. Palpatine continues to sabotage attempts at peace talks, including assassinating Yoda, Oppo Rancisis and Sahoka, framing the Jedi as the warmongers and executing Order 66. Palpatine prolongs the Clone Wars for five years before declaring himself Emperor and ordering Darth Maul and Savage Opress to kill Dooku and the Separatist council. He has <missing text> brothers kidnap Force-sensitive children across the galaxy in order to turn them into a Dark Side army which will hunt down threats to his rule, taking Ezra Bridger and Mara Jade as his apprentices. After getting rid of Maul and Savage as well, Palpatine uses Transfer essence to achieve immortality and rule the' galaxy forever.
^ He has which brothers kidnap children?
Spelling to work on: assassin (and words based on it).
Edited by Arivne on May 1st 2023 at 9:09:50 AM

Grow: Trivia
Legends Of Idleon: Shout-Out
Ace Attorney: Character (Miles Edgeworth)