This thread is for tropers who have trouble with English and would like some help with the crazy grammar of this crazy language.
Write down what you wish to edit on the wiki. If you have been suspended from editing, another troper might be kind enough to edit for you after your suggestions have been corrected.
The thread is for help and feedback on your own suggested edits.
If you want help correcting other people's edits (e.g., if you find a page which seems to have grammar problems but want a second opinion, or you don't feel able to fix it by yourself) then that's off-topic here, but we have a separate Grammar Police cleanup thread
that can provide assistance.
Edited by Mrph1 on Nov 16th 2023 at 5:37:57 PM
You forgot the word "is". Also, you need to name the story in question.
Thanks Michael Katsuro.
"No matter how bad the heroes can get or how bad the situation is, we're sure we can overcome it and get our happy endings...""He then shoots the woman..." "He then proceeds to escape..." You're over-using the word "then". It's already implied that things happen in succession.
Your use of Convenient Escape Boat is a bit wrong. That one's about a boat that just happens to be near; it's not about boats people have prepared to escape with and go on to use for that purpose.
"The two mock each other's..." You've mentioned four characters. Which two are "the two"? Yeah, it can be deduced from context, but that inhibits the smoothness of the text.
"Knox feels Stantin's actions are endangering her." Unless Knox is a woman, this should read "endangering Sarah."
"Stantin lets Knox accompany him as he goes after Sarah and her captor"
"even after they have left the mountains" Which pair is "they"?`
"Then the killer murders the man he was trying to save" This is a bit awkward since, in the other occasions, you use the man's name.
"When the killer offers his captive Sarah" You need a comma after "captive" and "Sarah". Otherwise it sounds like he has a captive Sarah the way others have a captive dog.
From page 592 @Melinda
Due to their belief in Tracy's innocence and awareness that crime is running from without him...
^ "...crime is running from without him" is not correct English, but I can't tell with certainty what you meant to write.
...(the creator of Perry Mason)...
During The Roaring '20s and the The Great Depression...
One time he insists on the police signing a letter giving him the right...
...Robin Hood crimes, <- comma both due to a lack of evidence and because...
At one point, <- comma a sleazy TV producer who...the audience's attention...
...stoically discuss how a fire that "accidentally" started ...need to prove their...
^ "prove" should not be in italics.
However, <- comma when the police chase...and the killer has swum back to shore...
...have left the mountains <- no comma and he doesn't need Knox anymore.
When Norman nearly falls off a cliff, <- comma the killer scrambles to save his life...
Knox happily Trolls the City Mouse Agent Stantin about how the marmot he killed...
...Harry Potter in the ending while no one else does. <- period
During the scene where Fletcher is revealed to be corrupt, <- comma there's a shot...
Rex Crater kills the doctor who cloned him.
Edited by Arivne on Sep 6th 2021 at 9:58:18 AM
Thanks. I meant to say crimes is running wild for the Tracy example.
- Blackmail: In a flashback story, Dr. Thomas Wayne breaks into a closed drug store to get the medicine to treat a dying child, leaving behind a note and promising to pay for it. The druggist spends the next month blackmailing him over this. Ultimately, Alfred disguises himself as a cop to scare the druggist into handing the incriminating note over.
- Hope Spot: One story involves a pair of refugees obliviously wandering into one of Joker's hideouts and nearly blundering into various lethal traps. Batgirl saves them and directs them to a safe house. The story ends with one of them drinking a can of soda from the house. It turns out to be poisoned with Joker Venom.
- Rule of Three: The second issue has three interludes where a mugger unsuccessfully tries to hold up traders on their way to see the Penguin. His first intended victim walks away unmolested after realizing that the man's gun is empty, as if he had any valuable bullets, he wouldn't be wasting time trying to steal batteries. A passerby armed with a bow and arrow intervenes to protect his second intended victim (a young boy with bicycle tubes) in exchange for the boy becoming his trading partner. The third trader is Joker, and the mugger has just enough time to realize he's Mugging the Monster before becoming an Asshole Victim.
- In the first issue, a news helicopter crew throws a box of food into the city, with the Immoral Journalist wanting to film people fighting over it. Instead, everyone just cautiously takes a little food and leaves without fighting for more.
- To win back Gordon's trust, Batman removes his mask in front of him, only for Gordon to turn around and refuse to let him expose his secret identity.
- Batman has a Judgment of Solomon moment when two women fight for the right to raise an orphaned baby. Both of them pass the test, and they're ultimately persuaded to take care of the baby together.
- The Batcave's mechanic Harold ventures into the city determined to fix everything he encounters. It's an oddly empowering Put on a Bus moment.
- Azrael gives Batgirl a Christmas tree angel as a Christmas present.
- After encountering various thugs dressed as Joker, Azrael and Batgirl mistake the real Joker for another copycat and make a dismissive Your Costume Needs Work comment. Joker is left so flabbergasted and confused that he lets them walk out of there.
- Abusive Parents: Melvin's father beat up Melvin until he joined the Army and has been doing the same to his biological children since Melvin left.
- What Happened to the Mouse?: Bill's old agency partner is shown trying to help him get work in a few scenes, but ultimately his character arc doesn't get any resolution.
- Chekhov's Gunman: About twenty minutes before Areola appears in person (and is shown to be in on Steranko's plan), she is seen in one of the pictures that Michael's handlers show him. The presence of two other bikini-clad women in the photo disguise her importance.
- Dude, She's Like in a Coma: Kent tries to lick Melissa's ear while she's asleep in the seat next to him.
- What Happened to the Mouse?: When Krupp defies Steranko, the Big Bad explicitly stops Ilsa from killing him and merely orders his guards to take Krupp away, but Krupp is never seen or mentioned again.
- You're Insane!:
- After hearing about his plan to conquer Europe, Finance Minister Krupp declares that Steranko is mad.
- When Michael claims that Steranko is the villain, Richardson dismissively says that Michael is mad. Gadgeteer Genius Galante then asks "But what if he isn't?
Edited by Melinda on Sep 6th 2021 at 4:26:17 AM
"'' When Tracy" has just one quotation mark, for some reason.
"Due to their belief in Tracy's innocence and awareness" Since you're not talking about Tracy's awareness, you need a "their".
"they arrange to make a stop" Better just to say "they make a stop".
"It also turns out that..." Since you haven't mentioned any actual revelations before this sentence, "it also turns out" is wrong, since it's phrased as if you mean "In addition to the previously mentioned revelation".
"Perry Mason" has just one quotation mark.
"they don't leave behind any evidence." In order to avoid sounding like you're talking about the police, it's better to say "he doesn't leave behind any evidence".
"and successfully does so." should be changed into "which he successfully does."
"that throw of" "Off" is misspelled.
"get rich scheme" needs a hyphen in "get-rich". And it's usually "get-rich-quick".
"cover-up" has a hyphen.
"make Beaver angry to throw him off his game" should read "make Beaver angry and throw him off his game."
@Melinda
To win back Gordon's trust, Batman removes his mask in front of him, <- comma only for...
Azrael gives Batgirl a Christmas tree angel as a Christmas present.
Melvin's father beat up Melvin until he joined the Army and has...
Bill's old agency partner is shown trying to help him get work in a few scenes, <- comma but...
After hearing about his plan to conquer Europe, Finance Minister Krupp declares that Steranko is mad.
21. Mad Eye
A creature composing of a single eye and wings. It is known for its keen observation.
- Gradual Grinder: It specializes in inflicting status effects that wears down enemies over time. It can afflict Burn and Shock through its abilities, while Toxic Reaction allows damage received from Shock damage to inflict Poison. In addition, Fatal Upkeep increases the damage received from Burn, Poison, and Congeal (an ability that deals damage to enemies afflicted with Chill).
- Jack of All Trades: The Mad Eye can deal magical damage based on the four elements with each elements having certain status effects. It can deal Fire damage to inflict Burn, Water damage to inflict Armor Break, Earth damage to inflict Weaken, and Wind damage to inflict Shock.
- Oculothorax: The Mad Eye is an eye with wings and a tail, which contains a second brain.
- Regenerating Mana: Despite the name, Mana Burn increases his mana when Burn inflicts damage on the foe.
- Status-Buff Dispel: Cleanse gives attacks a chance to remove a buff.
- Weak to Magic: It is weak to magical damage, to balance out its resistance to physical damage and damage received from debuffs.
22. Nightwing
A stealthy bat known for drinking bloods of its prey.
- Bat Out of Hell: It is a monster, based on a bat, known for flying through the night stealthily and drinking blood from its prey. They were once primal monsters during the early days of humanity until their homes were pushed out by progress. They were more than eager to move into the Monster Sanctuary.
- Blow You Away: Their primary element and resistance is Wind. Its standard skills, Air Sickle and Cyclone, and the ultimate skill Typhoon Cut deal physical wind damage.
- Life Drain: Bite restores their health upon dealing damage to the target.
23. Toxiquus
A seahorse-like monster that lives in polluted parts of the ocean.
- Blow You Away: Toxiquus can learn standard skills, Whirlwind and Gale, and the ultimate skill Tornado to deal magical wind damage. Ironically, its weakness is Wind.
- Gradual Regeneration: Toxiquus can restore allies' health through Supply, while healing itself depending on the number of poisoned enemies through Toxic Feedback.
- Mr. Seahorse: A male Toxiquus carries the eggs inside a pouch under his belly, like real-life seahorses.
- Poisonous Person: A seahorse that adapted to the pollution that affects the ocean and developed a toxic sac in its belly. Gameplay-wise, Toxiquus is resistance to Earth element and is capable of inflicting and spreading poison through Slime Shot and Slime Volley.
Mariov: In general, you can change "it is" to "it's".
"composing of a single" You mean "composed of a single".
"that wears down" You mean "wear down".
"each elements" You mean "element".
"It is a monster, based on a bat, known for flying through the night" Is it the Nightwing that's known for flying through the night or the bat on which it's based?
"Toxiquus can learn standard skills" should read "Toxiquus can learn the standard skills". Also, the commas in this sentence should go.
I don't quite see how Gradual Regeneration is an example of the trope.
"A seahorse that adapted to the pollution that affects the ocean and developed a toxic sac in its belly." The word "It's" would help make this sentence fragment into... not a sentence fragment.
Thanks. I was looking at Gradual Regeneration in regard to replacing Healing Factor. I guess Healing Factor might do since it's mostly a gameplay thing.
Anyways, would these major revision suffice?
- Bat Out of Hell: It's a monstrous bat known for flying through the night stealthily and drinking blood from its prey. They were once primal monsters during the early days of humanity until their homes were pushed out by progress. They were more than eager to move into the Monster Sanctuary.
- Poisonous Person: It adapted to the polluted ocean by gathering the wastes and storing them in the toxic sac inside its belly. Gameplay-wise, Toxiquus is resistance to Earth element and is capable of inflicting and spreading poison through Slime Shot and Slime Volley.
Edited by mariovsonic999 on Sep 6th 2021 at 12:25:36 PM
Hi fellas. It's me again. Let's have another try.
Some Fridge Horror for Ghost (1990):
- The film ends good for Sam, as he avenges his death and goes to Heaven once his unfinished business on Earth is complete, but what about Molly and Oda Mae? Once the police arrive, they will find them alone with Carl's corpse, and there are no available witnesses to testify on their behalves...
Hi fellas. It's me again. Let's have another try.
A Tear Jerker for V for Vendetta:
- Imagine how must have reacted the young girl's parents upon discovering from their neighbours that their daughter was killed for committing vandalism, even if the Fingerman who shot her was murdered.
Here is another one I am trying, this time incorporating a set of quotes showcasing the trope in case. It's an example of Answer Cut in The Fairly OddParents! episode "Apartnership"...
- Answer Cut: Used and slightly lampshaded; when Timmy tries to get Cosmo and Wanda to stop fighting, he explains that they actually love each other so much that if they had to they could choose each other all over again, prompting this exchange...
Mama Cosma: OK, you're on!
Cosmo and Wanda: On what?
(cuts to a dating game show)
Announcer: On The Fairy Dating Game!
- One-Scene Wonder: Plenty of ordinary citizens and non-costumed criminals from the Archive Panic storyline manage to rival some of the recurring heroes and villains in memorability despite only appearing in a single issue (and not even always in leading roles).
- The three kids (particularly the one who defends his food with a slingshot) who each scavenge some food dropped from a helicopter in the opening scene of the first omnibus provide an interesting look at how the introduction of that food affects the deprived community. The reasonable trader who barters for an apple with one kid and the thieves who try to rob the other two also add a lot to the scene.
- The social worker refugee from the first issue who tries to barter for shelter from a gang by saying that he helps people who don't get along communicate. The gang members agree that this sounds like a skill they can use, but in a grim case of Exact Words, make him a Dead Guy on Display.
- The young trader known only as The Nomad, who faces down a mugger with courage and charm in the second issue while deducing that the man's gun isn't loaded. The mugger counts as well, if only because of how he later makes the mistake of accosting Joker.
- The man who appears in one Azrael issue and has a Sadistic Choice between feeding his daughter or his father, inspiring both anger and pity from Azrael at different points.
- William "Sarge" Riley, the Retired Badass protagonist of the standalone issue "Home Sweet Home." He gets some awesome and heartwarming moments as the protector of his neighborhood and manages to get away with defying Joker by impressing the clown with his attitude.
- Sonny Epifani, a fedora-wearing Mafia member who brings a lot of integrity to his new job of rescuing earthquake victims during his brief appearance in Cataclysm.
- The Elites Jump Ship:
- In the Contagion story that leads up to No Man's Land, when a group of Gotham one-percenters learn that a dangerous virus has reached the city, they send away their servants and lock themselves inside a penthouse to engage in debauchery while riding it out. One of them already has the virus, and things go downhill for them from there.
- Right before an earthquake-ravaged Gotham City is quarantined and all disaster relief is discontinued, most of the city's upper class flee. Much of its lower class is unable to afford to do the same.
- Many of the people with money who remain in Gotham (a mixture of elites and criminals) end up paying a crime lord named Shank enormous sums of money to smuggle them out of the city several months into the disaster. He takes all of their valuables and then locks them in a cellar to cannibalize each other.
Edited by Melinda on Sep 7th 2021 at 6:41:26 AM
@ The Batman vs. Dracula Revising a past entry.
- The terror of the average Gotham citizen throughout the vampire rampage (which they think Batman is responsible for) practically oozes through the screen. As Batman investigates the cemetery, the new night watchman (whose predecessor was the first person to disappear) cowers behind a tombstone, watching him. He frantically calls the police about Batman's presence, begging them to arrive before he becomes the next "lost one" in a way that conveys a surprising amount of emotion.
Edited by Melinda on Sep 7th 2021 at 6:42:28 AM
