Corrupt-a-wish.

Granted, but people with opposing ships find out and flood you with endless hate and dox you.

I wish I was friends with all my favourite fictional characters!

Granted, but their still fictional so you're just sad and alone.

I wish rollerskating would be deleted from reality.

Granted. They don't know who you are, and kill you.

Granted. It's replaced by something ten times worse.

I wish Weird Al would put Friday in his polka melody.

Edited by Playing_with_boy on Dec 15th 2018 at 2:02:35 AM

Granted. It becomes so popular that it is played everywhere constantly and becomes incredibly obnoxious to listen to but you are unable to escape it.

I wish the Library of Alexandria wasn't destroyed.

Granted. You also discover that no, not even the Library of Alexandria immune to Sturgeon's Law.

I wish I could 100% every game I play with little effort.

Granted, You 100% every game in existence in an instant, but now there's nothing to play anymore.

I wish for the best sandwich in the world.

Granted but it becomes the only edible food in the whole world, which means everyone fights to the death for it, only for it to rot as soon as the last remaining human tries to bite it.

I wish to have a personal indestructible spaceship and have all legal requirements to own it.

Granted, you need fuel, crews, spacesuits, ammo, space weaponry, rations, space food, etc. to pilot it, which would cost a lot of money. Unfortunately, you have none.

I wish I can cuddle a cute girl.

Granted. Unfortunately, you don't have consent so she's creeped out by this weirdo who just walked up and randomly started hugging her.

I wish I was more charismatic.

Granted. Unfortunately, when you jokingly suggest that someone kill you, they take it seriously.

I wish I was the twin sister of Rise Kujikawa.

Granted. Unfortunately, you died way before the events of Persona 4, after an unfortunate car crash.

I wish for more genies.

Granted. They’re all more than happy to corrupt your wishes.

I wish that I could go to sleep more easily at night and get up more easily in the morning.

Granted but due to that you die in a fire that occurs in your house, which you couldn't detect due to being too well asleep.

I wish to get a signed copy of Smash Bros Ultimate (By Sakurai himself).

Granted. Unfortunately, someone gets so jealous that you own it that they kill you for it and steal your copy.

I wish John Wick was my guardian.

Granted but you eventually get his dog killed and he kills you for it.

I wish I could make Metalucy a canon pairing.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Edited by VengefulBale on Dec 25th 2018 at 8:59:23 AM

Granted. However, it only appears in supplemental material.

I wish I could understand animals perfectly like a Disney princess.

Granted; unfortunately, you don't also get the ability to speak to them, and eventually you get mauled by a bear trying to find a species that can understand you.

I wish I was Ryougi Shiki.

Granted. You are in a coma due to a car crash. This could have never, ever been avoid.

I wish for $314.15.

Granted, but you can only use the money to buy pies with the pi symbol carved into it, and only on Pi Day at 3:14 (AM or PM).

I wish I had a nice foot massage.

Granted, your feet are infested with parasites and bacteria after the massage.

I wish I'm Kitaeri.

Edited by Mhazard on Dec 27th 2018 at 4:19:33 AM

Granted. Now you have to act like her forever until everyone figures out you're not really her.

I wish i had the powers of Yukari Yakumo.

Granted. You don't have the Required Secondary Powers, so you are dead.

I wish I had a pecan pie, and glass of lemonade.

The pie was delicious, but the lemonade was so sour your face imploded.

I wish for the perfect TF 2 Cosplay.

Edited by Jaxfirebus on Dec 26th 2018 at 7:08:19 AM

Granted. It gets ruined very quickly.

I wish for a new vacuum cleaner.

Granted. It explodes after getting full, and you suffocate on all the assorted vacuum-cleaner-crap.

I wish for computer keyboard-compatible boxing gloves.