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Haven Planescape Hijack Since: Jan, 2001
Planescape Hijack
#301: Aug 4th 2009 at 6:46:23 PM

We're all a pool of tang. Unfortunately, because we don't have any brains or organs, this means we're nonsentient and, more to the point, dead.

I wish I could remember more of my dreams, and that only 10% were nightmares, and that none of my dreams could kill me.

edited 4th Aug '09 6:46:51 PM by Haven

Productivity is for people without internet connections. -Count Dorku
WilliamWideWeb (weaving) Since: Jan, 2001
(weaving)
#302: Aug 4th 2009 at 6:49:45 PM

You remember a nightmare so horrifying it leads you to lie down on the road(a la Radiohead's "Just" music video).

I wish I had money, in an electronic format.

SHIKI is dead.
melloncollie Since: Feb, 2012
#303: Aug 4th 2009 at 6:50:47 PM

You have millions stashed away in an online banking account, but the internet crashes permanently and all is lost.

I wish ~ was in love with me.

WilliamWideWeb (weaving) Since: Jan, 2001
(weaving)
#304: Aug 4th 2009 at 6:51:15 PM

~ is in love with you. This causes Bobby G to get jealous and murder him.

I wish I had an evil twin.

SHIKI is dead.
Zudak Since: Dec, 1969
#305: Aug 4th 2009 at 6:53:07 PM

Your evil twin shoots you, decapitates and disembowels you, tars and feathers the chunks, hangs them in a gibbet for a week, and then sets them on fire.

I wish I had a Magical Girlfriend.

melloncollie Since: Feb, 2012
#306: Aug 4th 2009 at 6:53:15 PM

Bobby? Kill ~? What is the world coming to

Your evil twin is a psychopath who kills everyone you love for the evuls, then decides to make himself a woman suit out of their skins.

Your Magical Girlfriend dies of cancer 3 weeks into the relationship. Boo hoo.

I wish THX was more affectionate.

edited 4th Aug '09 6:53:44 PM by melloncollie

WilliamWideWeb (weaving) Since: Jan, 2001
(weaving)
#307: Aug 4th 2009 at 6:54:26 PM

THX is more affectionate. He falls in love with another troper and leaves the forum.

Yes, it's ridiculously out of character for Bobby G to do this, but that's what happens when you use Reality Warper powers

I wish I had Reality Warper powers.

SHIKI is dead.
melloncollie Since: Feb, 2012
#308: Aug 4th 2009 at 6:56:38 PM

You become suicidally depressed and kill yourself. Good job, you killed the universe too!

I wish Michael Jackson was still alive.

WilliamWideWeb (weaving) Since: Jan, 2001
(weaving)
#309: Aug 4th 2009 at 6:57:11 PM

Michael Jackson is still alive. Several children were just molested.

I wish I had a TARDIS.

SHIKI is dead.
LuckyRevenant ALMSIVI from The Flood Since: Jan, 2001
ALMSIVI
#310: Aug 4th 2009 at 6:58:08 PM

Your TARDIS gets stuck in the shape of a small rock.

I wish I knew more about linguistics and that I could get a conlang developed.

"I can't imagine what Hell will have in store, but I know when I'm there, I won't wander anymore."
melloncollie Since: Feb, 2012
#311: Aug 4th 2009 at 6:58:12 PM

You have a quite spacious TARDIS, but fifty serial killers are hiding inside and they flay you to death.

You get a fancy degree in linguistics, but you went to Yale University without financial aid to get it. You're now a quarter million dollars in debt.

I wish Batman was real.

edited 4th Aug '09 6:58:59 PM by melloncollie

WilliamWideWeb (weaving) Since: Jan, 2001
(weaving)
#312: Aug 4th 2009 at 7:00:53 PM

Batman is real. So is the Joker. He kills you.

I wish I had the ability to manipulate fire, coupled with immunity to it.

SHIKI is dead.
GuestOfDishonour Real Horrorshow from The Coolest Drivers High Since: Dec, 2009
Real Horrorshow
#313: Aug 4th 2009 at 7:02:38 PM

Granted, you get your arse kicked by water.

Je souhaite le thon epique.

Cu braţele armate, cu focul vostru-n vine, "Viaţă-n libertate ori moarte" strigă toţi.
WilliamWideWeb (weaving) Since: Jan, 2001
(weaving)
#314: Aug 4th 2009 at 7:03:16 PM

I don't speak French so I'm just going to set you on fire.

I wish that Terror Island hadn't ended.

SHIKI is dead.
melloncollie Since: Feb, 2012
#315: Aug 4th 2009 at 7:04:28 PM

Terror Island goes on forever, but unfortunately you are no longer entertained by it.

I am content and wish for nothing.

WilliamWideWeb (weaving) Since: Jan, 2001
(weaving)
#316: Aug 4th 2009 at 7:05:01 PM

You are now nothing.

I wish I had mind control.

SHIKI is dead.
LuckyRevenant ALMSIVI from The Flood Since: Jan, 2001
~ ;) from the ''ruined'' temple Since: Jan, 2001
#318: Aug 4th 2009 at 7:09:14 PM

melloncollie! I'm so flattered! I'll have to...make you something

And Bobby G...would want to kill me? why, that's what I was going to wish for grin he'd be such a nice playmate

William Wide Web gets mind control, but finds it's just not the same when they aren't coerced into it, you know?

Because that way

there's no struggle

Ah, I wish I could go back to those days when I didn't have to hold back.

It makes the whole thing seem like a sham sometimes

edited 4th Aug '09 7:10:34 PM by ~

aka Venhax
GuestOfDishonour Real Horrorshow from The Coolest Drivers High Since: Dec, 2009
Real Horrorshow
#319: Aug 4th 2009 at 7:09:26 PM

Granted, but so do I.

I wish that Kyle Hebert was cast as Nozomu in the english dub of Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei.

Cu braţele armate, cu focul vostru-n vine, "Viaţă-n libertate ori moarte" strigă toţi.
melloncollie Since: Feb, 2012
#320: Aug 4th 2009 at 7:13:18 PM

@ ~: Kyaaah! Now I'm going to hold you to that promise waii

Your wish is granted, but the rest of the cast is replaced by cheaper, suckier voice actors and the dub is unwatchable.

I wish Swiss cheese didn't have holes.

Scrounge (4 Score & 7 Years Ago)
#321: Aug 4th 2009 at 7:19:18 PM

Swiss cheese doesn't have holes. It doesn't taste the same, either. It tastes like chalk.

I wish Melloncollie loved me instead of tilde. (Tilde is creepy.)

melloncollie Since: Feb, 2012
#322: Aug 4th 2009 at 7:26:04 PM

I love you so much I jump on you and ask for sex. Unfortunately for you, I consider vore the ultimate expression of love.

I wish french fries weren't fattening.

WilliamWideWeb (weaving) Since: Jan, 2001
(weaving)
#323: Aug 4th 2009 at 7:37:01 PM

French fries aren't fattening. They're straight-up poison.

I wish us Tropers all lived in the same place so we could have a massive cuddle orgy for real.

SHIKI is dead.
Haven Planescape Hijack Since: Jan, 2001
Planescape Hijack
#324: Aug 4th 2009 at 7:42:51 PM

I know I've thought that too. Not the cuddle orgy part, that'd just be weird. But like...we could all go to the zoo or something.

We all live in the same place, but this comes at the price of not being an internet community. While we could have a massive cuddle orgy for real, we're all just too awkward to initiate it. Worse, it's like Victory-Guided Amnesia, so we end up gradually forgetting each other and see the whole thing as a dream. And you can't ever go to TV Tropes again, or you'll burn up.

I wish...you know what, I also wish I had a TARDIS.

Productivity is for people without internet connections. -Count Dorku
LuckyRevenant ALMSIVI from The Flood Since: Jan, 2001
ALMSIVI
#325: Aug 4th 2009 at 7:43:36 PM

The cuddle orgy turns into a non-stop sexual orgy, killing many members of the community. Not to mention that many people are raped.

You get your TARDIS, but it stops working shortly afterwards.

I wish that I became a famous author, who didn't become an asshole, that was loved by his fans, but not stalked by them, and that I wasn't killed by any of them for changing what I wrote.

edited 4th Aug '09 7:44:40 PM by Lucky Revenant

"I can't imagine what Hell will have in store, but I know when I'm there, I won't wander anymore."

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