- I gotta get around to writing up the article for that...
edited 11th Mar '10 9:28:05 AM by DrRockopolis
[[tvtropes.org/pmwiki/lb_i.php?lb_id=12919183980B30760200 Liveblog of]] John Carter Of MarsWasn't sure what to say.
[[tvtropes.org/pmwiki/lb_i.php?lb_id=12919183980B30760200 Liveblog of]] John Carter Of MarsFailures and Trolls and Losers?
Whee! Fun acronyms are fun!
"It ain't about whether you win or lose, unless you got money on the game, because...damn. That's your money, son."@J Bridge: Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha.
Don't forget Condensed, Lightened, Optimised, Amended and Cleansed Adaptation of Tabletop Immersive Metagaming Entertainment. CLOACA TIME
Also Revised, Amended, Non-Denominational Youth-Group Appropriate, Youngster's Optimised Gaming Rules Edition Secundus. RANDY GAY OGRES
Really, we can do this all day.
Ah, the Bile Fascination has claimed another young annonymii. Yes, this is pretty much the reason why I've followed this thread and the Sonichu thread.
Welcome to the TV tropes forums by the way. Watch out for falling anvils, don't let the leprechaun talk you into starting fires, and don't worry about the Eldritch Abomination, he's nice enough once you get to know him.
The term "Great Man" is disturbingly interchangeable with "mass murderer" in history books.Thanks Game Chainsaw.
I've been a fan of this place for quite some time now, since it is so terribly useful.
I've known of FATAL for quite some time as well, but up until now, the Bile Fascination wasn't quite enough for me to succumb. This seemed so much better.
Now, of course, I too want to make a refugee from FATAL world for my next high-fantasy RPG character.
(I also want to run a Heroquest2 version of My Immortal, which is not a good idea, I suspect.
)
@Lightcastle: Welcome aboard, have a fishy stick.
Yes, a heroquest version of My Immortal probably isn't a good idea. But why should that stop you?
As lightcastle has done...I've..god I can't believe a thread that includes the words RANDY GAY OGRES (my new battle cry by the way) was the one to get me to actually make an identity.My eyeballs burn but I can't stop watching.Also,for those of you who want to play an actual game using FATAL:From Another Pit Another Lame ass D&D rip off with enough originality to match Byron Hall' Sanity there's a helpful online tool called Maptool that might be able to handle the strain of running such an abomination.
Fnord.Or a "suicide" button...
"It ain't about whether you win or lose, unless you got money on the game, because...damn. That's your money, son."And now, to ease comprehension of the "rebuttal", we present...the English/Abyronation Bilingual Dictionary. Painstakingly produced from the rebuttal, FATAL, bathroom gossip, wild speculation, and a magic 8-ball.
Historically and mythologically accurate scholarship.
Stuff I made up.
Most of the random magical effects are intended as humorous
I think crude vulgarity is funny!
Bell curve
That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it.
I've gone to great lengths to be clear
I've gone to great lengths to piss people off.
It (hopefully) discourages people from being so willing to play retards.
Intellectually subnormal people in FATAL have a chance of gaining a strength bonus, so you shouldn't want to play them. Not that this matters, because all your stats are randomly determined...yeah, I'm beginning to hate me too.
FATAL could have more complicated sex
I don't even know what half those drugs were, let alone why I took them.
Any child can rant
I'm such a failure at life I can't even rant properly. God I hate being me.
FATAL does not specialise in Greek mythology
I do not understand this Earth concept of "jokes"
Where is dating included?
Wait! Don't hit me! I'll hit me!
Please don't get boggled down.
I don't understand how English works.
When Darren MacLennan chose libel and defamation of character to debate, I stopped posting
I spent three days sulking in the garage.
I have neither searched for nor found any material supporting Retard Strength
Screw it, everyone knows I'm a lying idiot, I might as well admit it.
Realism
I keep using this word. I should not think it means what I think it means.
One assumption I have made in writing FATAL, and it won't be made explicit until the gaming world is written, is that all non-European influence has been removed. That's right, I've attempted to minimize Asian, Middle-Eastern, and Egyptian influences, as well as others. Therefore, corpses are not embalmed and buried, but burned. Asian spices do not exist, nor does tobacco or zombies. Consequently, the human race is Caucasian.
I'm an idiot.
This is not racism, but merely the result of restricting the scope of the game to only that which originated in Europe. Hopefully, you will not find food, plants, herbs, monsters, nor anything else originating from outside Europe.
And a liar.
It's amazing how many terms there are in English for loose women, and lack thereof for men. And it's my fault for representing the English language, which is a result of history?
Breaking news, folks, I'm still an idiot!
And none of those games to my knowledge have scholarship and footnotes to sources
I've actually managed to understand less than nothing about game design
Darren, who only refers to his high school experience, can tell?
Gotta keep talking about my MA, then people will start believing I actually have one
He may also want to consider the justified murder of all the "whores" (as they're referenced several times) in Penelope's house, because they are sluts.
Did I actually write that after making up all that bullshit about not being a misogynist? Fuck.
The tables are well-reasoned
I’ve had far, far too much crack.
For the record, I enjoy controversial humor
For the record, I enjoy being an arse and calling it controversial humour.
Sure, what better way to represent chaos magic than with a higher degree of randomness.
I just had the most marvelous idea for pissing people off!
One supportive example is my nomination for a University Fellowship due to academic performance that was consistent and superior.
I’m a cheat as well as a liar and a troll.
Ether was considered a magical construct
I have no fucking idea what I’m talking about.
All flames were by RP Gnetters
I’m a troll.
FATAL is the best role-playing game that there could be!
Goodbye. Me am Bizarro.
Translation: Byron Hall is a fucking moron.
"It ain't about whether you win or lose, unless you got money on the game, because...damn. That's your money, son."I tried to read the rebuttal once. The sheer, concentrated douchebaggery and idiocy made me dizzy, to the point I had to retreat. At least in FATAL he restricted his arrogance to the intro and aedile advice.
Though I still laugh at how he apparently thinks "vampire" is your job in Vampire The Masquerade.
I haven't known true fear in a very, very long time.Wow, I never noticed the sup/tg/ link in the So Bad Its Horrible page. FATAL is The Aristocrats!
"And as long as a sack of shit is not a good thing to be, chivalry will never die."Downloaded pdf and rolled character. Rolled a... a... I guess. I'll get back to that. All right. I went through the "Another Time" version. I went through the whole process of character creation, all the way to spells. Well, open gedit ctrl-c ctrl-v and...
Why do I do these things? Why?
Name: None yet
Race: human
Class: Sorceress!
Lvl: 1
LP: 28(not to shabby)
Gender: female(for lulz)
Age: 16! Jailbait!
Height 55 inches... 11" below avg
Weight: 105.. 10lbs below avg
BMI: 24.22, yay no stupid modifiers
Most Attractive: face
Most repulsive: lips
Skin: fair
Hair: Black... Elegant Gothic lolita? No too old
Hair length: 21"
Hair type: thick and kinky...
Eyes: Blue grey
Breadth: 27.5"
Vision: perfect, yay
Aeriola diameter: 1.5"
Hue: Medium
nipple length 1/4"
Protruding upper lip: yet another facial charisma penalty
Cup: B...
Vaginal circumference: 3" the games minimum.
Depth: 5.565"... it is deeper than it is around
Tongue: 2"(a small tongue)
Anal circumference: I rolled the max: 15"
Hymen resistance: 43
Hey i avoided menstrual discomfort! yay!
Feet: 7" game min! joy!
Fist: 7"
Right handed.
head circumference: 23.223"
Physique: 116(skill+12)
Fitness: 64(roll 69-5) [Skill -21, sprint 34]
Strength: 123 (roll164-41) [skill +12, damage +12%, lp+2, clean 70, bench 141, dead 211]
Body: 151(170-19 for physique) [skill+25]
Health: 128 (roll 128) [skill+14, LP+4, Vomit -14, Illness 65%]
Chrisma: 153(skill+29)
Facial: 151 (roll167-16) [skill+25, "good looking"]
Vocal: 169( [skill+32, melodic]
Kinetic Charisma: 171 (roll171) [skilled+32, refined]
Rehtorical Charisma: 163 (roll163) [skill+30, avg speech 170]
Dexterity: 102 (skill-2)
Hand-eye: 81(roll 81) [skill-10, precision 1/16"]
Agility: 156(roll 156) [Skill+25, Armor+9, brawl 3, sec to stand 2]
Reaction time: 34 (roll 34) [skill-44, sleep 5]
Enunciation: 139 (roll 139) [skill+20, Speech 270wpm, -14% cast time]
Intelligence: 127 (skill+20)
Language 202([roll 195+7) [skill+43, Languages 7]
Math 136 (roll 134+2) [Skill+17, Trig]
Spatial: 107 (roll105+2) [skill+3, parts 250]
Anylitic: 134 (roll 129+5) [skill+17]
Wisdom 138 (skill+17)
Drive: 131 (roll133-2) [skill +14, lp+2, 14hrs relaxing]
Inutition: 112 (roll107+5) [skill+6]
Common sense: 127 (roll 127) [skill+14]
Reflection 161 (roll174+4) [+34, age 1]
Piety points: 54[Worships intermittently]
Ethicality: Neutral+
Moarality: Neutral+
Sanguine: 0
Choleric 73
Melancholy: 68
Phlem: 71
Mental illness: 3(oh fun): Paranoia, Borderline Personality disorder, RAPTOPHILLIA. So she is a paranoid, and depressed (cuts herself daily). I rolled a freaking gothic rapist(headdesk)
Birthday: June/22
Birth: legit. yay.
Class: Upper middle class, Literate
Moneies: none now..
Home: Capital city.
Siblings: none
Martial: Single, whew.
Sexuality: hetero
Debauchery: 86...
Dad is a scholar
Mom is a cook
Class Stuff
I get 3 disciplines: Ether,Air, and Water, so no killing with fire :(
I know: 10 spells, get there later
Spells are level: 1
MP: 57 reg: 2/hr awake. 3/hr asleep
Skills:
Acting(drama): 24
Agriculture: 14
Aim: -5
Anatomy: 20
Animal handling: 6
Appraise: 17
Architecture: 10
Armor(General): 0
Armor(Specific):0
Armorsmithing: 3
Balance: 25
Basket Weaving: 2
Blacksmithing: 7
Blindfighting: -12
Bookbinding: 14
Bowyer: +3
Brasssmithing: 7
Brawling: 25
Brewing: 14
Candlemaking: 14
Carpentry: 3
Cartography: 3
Catching: -10
Charioteering: -2
Cheesemaking: 14
Cleaning: 14
Climb: 29
Clockmaking: 3
Cobbling: 14
Comedy(Buffonory): 29
Comedy(Physical): 26
Comedy(Pun): 29
Constellations: 21
Contortion: 11
Cooking:14
Coppersmithing: 7
Cosmetics: 9
Cosmos(General Planes): 23
Cosmos(Specific): 20
Dancing: 28
Delousing: -10
Diagnosis: 18
Direction Sense: 6
Disarm: 7
Disguise: 21
Dismemberment: 0
Divine(Astrology): 23
Divine(All others):6
Dyeing: -10
Enamelling: -10
Engraving: -10
Etiquette: 18:
Fishing: 14
Fletching: 3
Forestering: 14
Forging: 16
Gamble: 15
Gemcutting: 3
Genealogy: 24
Girdle-making: 14
Glass-blowing: 3
Glovemaking: 3
Goldsmithing: 3
Grooming: 14
Haggling: 18
Hairstyling: -3
Hatmaking: 14
Heraldry: 14
Herbalism: 20
Hewing: 12
Hide: 19
History(All): 20
Hunting: -10
Hurl: 0
Impaling: 0
Inkmaking: 14
Intimidate: 20
Juggling: -10
Jump: 0
Language(read/write): literate
Language(speak): 43, which cancels out LC
Law: 20
Locksmithing: 3
Lockpicking: -10
Logic: +17
Mangling: 0
Massage: +11
Math(all): +17
Milking: 2
Milling: 14
Mining: 14
Minting: 14
Mountaineering: 5
Music(counterpoint): 17
Music(Theory): 17
Music(instrument): -3
Nature(all): 23
Painting: -3
Papermaking: 3
Parry: 10
Perfumemaking: 14
Persuasion: 29
Pewtersmithing: 7
Philosophy: 20
Pickpocket: -10
Pottery: 14
Pursemaking: 14
Read lips: 6
Religion: 20
Remember detail: 34
Research: 20
Riding: 25
Ritual(complex): 5
Ropemaking: 14
Rope use: -10
Saddlemaking: 14
Sailing: 20
Sailmaking: 3
Sculpture: -2
Search: 10
Seduction: 27
Sexual Adeptness: 27
Sheathe making: 14
Shipwright: 3
Sight: 8 (unlike the other senses, you do not start w/3d10 in this, so she is almost blind)
Silence: 14
Silversmithing: 7
Skinning: 14
Smell: 12 (and I cannot invest more than 2 sp here)
Soapmaking: 14
Sound:210 (and cannot invest more than 5sp here)
Spellcasting(combat): 17 aka auto pass
Spellcasting(familiarity): 20 aka auto pass
Spellcasting(specific): 0
Spitting: 20
Stonemasonry: 7
Storytelling: 29
Surgery: 5
Swim: -4
Symbology: 20
Tailoring: -3
Tanning: 14
Taste: 7 (cannot invest more than 4 pts)
Teaching: 13
Thatching: 14
Tilemaking: 14
Tinkering: 14
Touch: 29 (cannot invest more than 3 pts here)
Toxicology: 20
Tracking: 20
Transcribing: 43
Trapping: 14
Trickery: 29
Tumble: 25
Urinating: 7 (wow, she can urinate on demand!, if only a little bit)
Vertiliquism: 20
Wainwrighting: 14
Weapons:
Weapon(knife):(5) if S (-10), if SA (+1), if A(+7)
Weapon(specific): as above
Weapon trick: -10
Weapon Smithing: 3
Weapon Mastery: 0
Weather Prediction: 24
Weaving: 14
Whellwrighting: 3
Wilderness Lore: 20
Wrestling: 18(nice to know she can avoid rape)
Invetory: (joy)
thigh boots (count as leather armour for legs & feet)
Bandeux
Underwear
A cloak
Hunting Knife (SA(+1 to hit), 13"(T), range: 12', damage 1d8, penetration?: -/-15/-25
This gives her a defigre of 6.3, or 0% fail chance.
Spells (finally 500 pages in...) Ether, air, water, and i get 10 spells
here goes
Lvl 1: Ascertain Properties Call chilly gust (1d6-1 damage in a 20X20X20 cube) Call light Charm Small Mammal Detect Magic Lesser healing (1d10) Lesser hologram Pleasure berry Putrid portrait Raise Prowess
Yay. All done
Spelling mistakes likely abound. I did this in three sittings. Any name suggestions would be welcome.
edited 31st Mar '10 11:34:27 AM by Christopholes
I already have at least a streamlining process planned for the skills, and will reluctantly sacrifice my Spring break if you want me to try rewriting this.
Let us see. Lump all the skills that could be profession and use common sense into... profession. All the metal working skills could be just metalworking. Divination could be similar, but Astrology uses Intel rather than Intuition.
Then we lump all the classes like barber and cook into a common class, as they are redundant. We could make a common skill modifier chart like they have in 3.5e Dn D. I'll take a chainsaw to the random magic effect table later. I could probably make a decent chart w/out all the juvenile and redundant effects. However, it is pretty much FATAL's anti-soul, so maybe we should keep it. I'm not a medical physicist, but the orifice ripping table and the graphic gore tables could be better while still retaining the concept. Any medical physicists out there could give input. Or we could just cut one or both of them.
Removing the gender modifiers is a must.
Yeah, we could do this.
The stat block above would go from ~275 lines to ~240, and with more skill reform, we could drop it even further.
edited 31st Mar '10 1:02:09 PM by Christopholes
So in this POS game system, you only choose "female" and the dice decided you were a 16 years-old girl with perfect vision but "nearly blind", with unnecessary details such as humongous aureolas and an "anal circumference" 5 times wider than..., her most repulsive feature in the middle of her most attractive one, who is also a paranoid rapist but at least speaks magnificently... Mr Hall sure did a masterpiece here.
edited 24th May '15 3:36:10 AM by Medinoc
"And as long as a sack of shit is not a good thing to be, chivalry will never die."

You might be able to make a decent RPG based on the world medieval Europeans thought they lived in, but FATAL's mechanics aren't a good starting place.