Don't get a Feeding tube surgically attached to you.
Get rid of cable, and switch to DirecTV
DirecTV: The future of TV is NOW.
When your cable goes out, your kid tries to play with you "The dream of tomorrow and the sky of today, expanding in unison"
When your kid tries to play with you, you convince them to play the quiet game.
Déjà vu, tell you what I'm gonna do, when they reminisce over you, my GodWhen you convince them to play the quiet game, it goes about as well as you expect.
Self-professed Wild Card who thinks cynicism isn't so bad.When the AI-generated captions are full of slurs that hurt your heart, you come to realize that AI hates you.
I sadly doubt he would like Popeyes, though...Don't end up going to war with robots. Get rid of cable and switch to DirecTV.
DirecTV: The future of TV is NOW.
When you have cable, you feel taunted by channels you can't access. Self-professed Wild Card who thinks cynicism isn't so bad.
When you realize why your town is on fire, you grab your gun.
Déjà vu, tell you what I'm gonna do, when they reminisce over you, my GodWhen you grab your gun, you realize you're hungry, so you eat it.
I sadly doubt he would like Popeyes, though...When you eat your gun, it pops back out of your arm just when you need it.
When you shoot your foot, you realize that you've lived through a literal version of an idiom.
Don't live through a literal version of an idiom. Switch to DirecTV today!
DIRECTV: THE FUTURE OF TV IS NOW
When you watch cable, a rabbit chews through it.
Something that happened to me a few weeks ago but with my internet instead

When your jaw drops to the floor, you seek medical attention for a broken jaw.
Edited by RandomFanOfStuff on Jun 2nd 2025 at 3:05:52 PM
Welp, add that to the list of Terrible Ideas That I Knew Were Terrible Ideas But Did Anyway...