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Bad Two-Sentence Horror

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iwantedtoaddsomething Since: Feb, 2015
#2401: Jun 30th 2025 at 7:30:40 PM

"Why not both?"


"And what happens if this immortal snail catches me?"

BBGunman CHAINSAW! from yes Since: Aug, 2024 Relationship Status: Anime is my true love
CHAINSAW!
#2402: Jun 30th 2025 at 7:40:49 PM

"It may have the power to trap you in a Mind Prison for all of eternity with nothing to do but scream into a white void, but at the end of the day, it's only a slug."


Why haven't you lost my virginity yet?

Edited by BBGunman on Jul 1st 2025 at 4:19:01 AM

Go watch the new Chainsaw Man movie. This is a threat.
BetterSlimebot from Check outside (The New Guy) Relationship Status: Desperate
#2403: Jun 30th 2025 at 8:26:35 PM

It's really hard to get laid when there's a leprechaun with a thousand teeth sitting on my head that refuses to leave.


Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Edited by BetterSlimebot on Jun 30th 2025 at 3:26:46 PM

WhoaBundy Since: Dec, 2013
#2404: Jun 30th 2025 at 8:43:01 PM

“Heck if I know, dude,” said 7 as he turned into a gun and shot through the middle of 6 while cackling maniacally.

——

If Dad came home, maybe this horrible nightmare would end.

iwantedtoaddsomething Since: Feb, 2015
#2405: Jul 1st 2025 at 7:41:24 AM

He's the only one tall enough to press the power button on the wasp generator.


We come in peace.

DeadlyEspresso Louisiana Heartstopper from your local Popeyes Since: Apr, 2023
Louisiana Heartstopper
#2406: Jul 1st 2025 at 7:44:13 AM

I'm Peace...


I was working at a pizza place when I felt a rumble in the ground...

I sadly doubt he would like Popeyes, though...
Mildude A Member of the Midnight Crew from the you-know-what Since: Sep, 2021 Relationship Status: is commanded to— WANK!
A Member of the Midnight Crew
#2407: Jul 1st 2025 at 9:10:45 AM

The rumble was Freddy Fazbear!


Aw, my pants are all wet!

Déjà vu, tell you what I'm gonna do, when they reminisce over you, my God
Neonocto Fire Chara! from Eight's apartment. (Troper in training) Relationship Status: Chocolate!
Fire Chara!
#2408: Jul 1st 2025 at 2:17:05 PM

"Hey that's my job!" Said the pants pissing monster.


I have clinical depression.

Arson!
BBGunman CHAINSAW! from yes Since: Aug, 2024 Relationship Status: Anime is my true love
CHAINSAW!
#2409: Jul 1st 2025 at 2:19:50 PM

Not even Mario Kart can save me!


I had a sick feeling in my stomach.

Go watch the new Chainsaw Man movie. This is a threat.
Unicorndance Logic Girl from Thames, N.Z. Since: Jul, 2015 Relationship Status: Above such petty unnecessities
Logic Girl
#2410: Jul 1st 2025 at 3:00:24 PM

I'm gonna turn my head 360 degrees and throw up everywhere!


My budgie seems a bit listless.

For every low there is a high.
Marchen Too hot (Hot damn) from Somewhere Out in Space (Experienced, Not Yet Jaded) Relationship Status: It's not my fault I'm not popular!
Too hot (Hot damn)
#2411: Jul 1st 2025 at 3:05:54 PM

And to make it worse, the pet store's been giving me a real runaround, first sending me to Bolton, and then I ended up in Ipswich, but then it turned out I was in Bolton all along, or maybe it was some place called Notlob actually, and it's all starting to feel kinda silly.


Hey, have you heard of those recent Knife Guy sightings in the park?

Read Otr of the Flame (She/Her)
WhoaBundy Since: Dec, 2013
#2412: Jul 1st 2025 at 3:14:24 PM

"Shit no, that sounds awful," said the guy sitting next to me on the bench right before he slashed my intestines out in front of a screaming grandmother.


As he stared out the window, I felt something had changed, broken, in Marcus since he returned from deployment.

Mildude A Member of the Midnight Crew from the you-know-what Since: Sep, 2021 Relationship Status: is commanded to— WANK!
A Member of the Midnight Crew
#2413: Jul 1st 2025 at 8:14:52 PM

Marcus now had four eyes, razor sharp teeth, and a gaping jaw.


In an almost teasing manner, he gulped down the necklace containing the harmless little sprite.

[down]Now I'm genuinely curious about what you were referencing.

Edited by Mildude on Jul 2nd 2025 at 11:15:48 AM

Déjà vu, tell you what I'm gonna do, when they reminisce over you, my God
iwantedtoaddsomething Since: Feb, 2015
#2414: Jul 1st 2025 at 8:30:43 PM

But it was a pillow-shaded sprite, and he was forced to spend the rest of eternity looking as if a light were shining directly on the center of his body. ...too obscure?

[up] A common pitfall in pixel art: https://derekyu.com/makegames/pixelart2.html


There is something very wrong with my new house.

Edited by iwantedtoaddsomething on Jul 2nd 2025 at 1:23:59 PM

Neonocto Fire Chara! from Eight's apartment. (Troper in training) Relationship Status: Chocolate!
Fire Chara!
#2415: Jul 2nd 2025 at 3:16:12 AM

It's alive.


Nice of the the princess to invite us over for a picnic, Gay Luigi?

Edited by Neonocto on Jul 2nd 2025 at 7:16:23 AM

Arson!
Marchen Too hot (Hot damn) from Somewhere Out in Space (Experienced, Not Yet Jaded) Relationship Status: It's not my fault I'm not popular!
Too hot (Hot damn)
#2416: Jul 2nd 2025 at 3:21:23 AM

Then Mario was beaten to death by Woke Transgender SJW Nonbinary Antifa Terrorist Pansexual Feminists for assuming his brother's sexuality.


When I finally broke down the door, I was shocked to see what I saw in the Knife Guy's lair...

Edited by Marchen on Jul 2nd 2025 at 12:21:32 PM

Read Otr of the Flame (She/Her)
Superjohn Muscle witch from Tokyo Empire Since: Jul, 2015 Relationship Status: Anime is my true love
Muscle witch
#2417: Jul 2nd 2025 at 3:57:09 AM

He was a gun nut, the fucking fraud!

We fled into our cellars from the horrifying monsters entering the town...

"Give our Captain back, you jerks!"
Neonocto Fire Chara! from Eight's apartment. (Troper in training) Relationship Status: Chocolate!
Fire Chara!
#2418: Jul 2nd 2025 at 4:21:02 AM

But the beer in the cellars was GONE!


I'm quite tired of knife guy.

Arson!
Marchen Too hot (Hot damn) from Somewhere Out in Space (Experienced, Not Yet Jaded) Relationship Status: It's not my fault I'm not popular!
Too hot (Hot damn)
#2419: Jul 2nd 2025 at 4:24:35 AM

"I'll fix that for you" said Dennis from Adit Sopo Jarwo as he snapped my neck.


Hah, look at this monkey's paw I stole from that shop over there!

Read Otr of the Flame (She/Her)
DeadlyEspresso Louisiana Heartstopper from your local Popeyes Since: Apr, 2023
Louisiana Heartstopper
#2420: Jul 2nd 2025 at 6:38:30 AM

That night, the monkey who's paw I had stolen attacked me.


I stared at the oven, waiting for my pizza to cook.

I sadly doubt he would like Popeyes, though...
WhoaBundy Since: Dec, 2013
#2421: Jul 2nd 2025 at 6:56:40 AM

It was only after the police led me to the car that I realized the pizza was actually my dad all along.


Sammy was so excited to use the mysterious thrift store jacket in her latest cosplay.

Mildude A Member of the Midnight Crew from the you-know-what Since: Sep, 2021 Relationship Status: is commanded to— WANK!
A Member of the Midnight Crew
#2422: Jul 2nd 2025 at 9:35:14 AM

The jacket worked too well, as it later turned sentient and started killing people like it did in the original source material.


I listed off my most embarrassing fetishes to my partner.

Déjà vu, tell you what I'm gonna do, when they reminisce over you, my God
iwantedtoaddsomething Since: Feb, 2015
#2423: Jul 2nd 2025 at 10:07:47 AM

As they made their way down the list, with a few eyebrow raises and faint smiles, I realized I'd had nothing to fear the whole time, and could always trust them to be tolerant — until I looked back up and they were staring at me as if they'd seen a murderer, as these words escaped from their lips: "you like boobs?"


My friend enthusiastically skipped across the decrepit bridge, urging me to come along.

Edited by iwantedtoaddsomething on Jul 2nd 2025 at 1:19:23 PM

BBGunman CHAINSAW! from yes Since: Aug, 2024 Relationship Status: Anime is my true love
CHAINSAW!
#2424: Jul 2nd 2025 at 10:12:15 AM

Then the bridge broke and he fell to his death.


I heard tornado sirens, and I ushered me and my family downstairs

Go watch the new Chainsaw Man movie. This is a threat.
Marchen Too hot (Hot damn) from Somewhere Out in Space (Experienced, Not Yet Jaded) Relationship Status: It's not my fault I'm not popular!
Too hot (Hot damn)
#2425: Jul 2nd 2025 at 10:17:23 AM

There the tornados were waiting, and I fed them my family to spare my community from the tornados.


Now, I'm the king of the swingers oh, the jungle VIP.

Read Otr of the Flame (She/Her)

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