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Mildude A Member of the Midnight Crew from the you-know-what Since: Sep, 2021 Relationship Status: is commanded to— WANK!
A Member of the Midnight Crew
#1751: Apr 23rd 2025 at 6:46:45 AM

"Dear This Troper, I wrote you, but you still ain't callin'..."


I rushed to my neighbor's house after hearing some screams, and I was shocked to see six dead bodies and four words written on the wall with blood.

Déjà vu, tell you what I'm gonna do, when they reminisce over you, my God
idkwhatiamdoingatp What's your function? from Hooking up the country helping business rise (Series 1) Relationship Status: I'm in love with my car
What's your function?
#1752: Apr 23rd 2025 at 7:01:47 AM

"DIE N"... It seems someone's still writing it.


The traffic was getting too noisy, so I decided to drive over a light, but- (CRASH!)

WHO PUT A DIESEL LOCOMOTIVE ON THE ROAD!?
Unicorndance Logic Girl from Thames, N.Z. Since: Jul, 2015 Relationship Status: Above such petty unnecessities
Logic Girl
#1753: Apr 23rd 2025 at 12:47:13 PM

Now I'm in the hospital run by a Mad Doctor.


That monkey at the zoo looks odd.

For every low there is a high.
dvorak The World's Least Powerful Man from Hiding in your shadow (Elder Troper) Relationship Status: love is a deadly lazer
The World's Least Powerful Man
#1754: Apr 23rd 2025 at 12:57:40 PM

It flipped me the bird!


I didn't order this...?

Now everyone pat me on the back and tell me how clever I am!
BlankBlankness Since: Aug, 2023
#1755: Apr 23rd 2025 at 12:57:51 PM

Why does it have a flinthead in its cage?

As I drank my beer, something felt terribly wrong inside me.

Vrei să pleci dar nu mă, nu mă iei / Nu mă, nu mă iei, nu mă, nu mă, nu mă iei / Chipul tău și dragostea din tei / Mi-amintesc de
Mildude A Member of the Midnight Crew from the you-know-what Since: Sep, 2021 Relationship Status: is commanded to— WANK!
A Member of the Midnight Crew
#1756: Apr 23rd 2025 at 1:10:23 PM

Turns out the beer was full of flesh eating fish!


I returned home and Dad was yelling at Mom about his room.

Edited by Mildude on Apr 23rd 2025 at 3:10:35 AM

Déjà vu, tell you what I'm gonna do, when they reminisce over you, my God
BBGunman TV Tropes' resident resident Since: Aug, 2024
TV Tropes' resident resident
#1757: Apr 23rd 2025 at 1:45:17 PM

God, I wish they'd just divorce already.


I got a strange letter in the mail earlier today.

guys im so back
Superjohn Muscle witch from Tokyo Empire Since: Jul, 2015 Relationship Status: Anime is my true love
Muscle witch
#1758: Apr 23rd 2025 at 1:55:36 PM

OH NO, THE TAX COLLECTORS HAVE SENT ME A WARNING !

I decided to go fro a walk, but something felt off about the person walking behind me...

"Give our Captain back, you jerks!"
Omega1065 Since: Nov, 2023
#1759: Apr 23rd 2025 at 1:56:26 PM

He was licking my neck! Ew!


I grabbed the yogurt from the fridge...

Edited by Omega1065 on Apr 23rd 2025 at 10:56:36 AM

BBGunman TV Tropes' resident resident Since: Aug, 2024
TV Tropes' resident resident
#1760: Apr 23rd 2025 at 2:07:42 PM

Wait... is that mold?


At 3 AM, I strolled into the graveyard thinking nothing could go wrong.

guys im so back
Mildude A Member of the Midnight Crew from the you-know-what Since: Sep, 2021 Relationship Status: is commanded to— WANK!
A Member of the Midnight Crew
#1761: Apr 23rd 2025 at 4:11:51 PM

"Hello," said the neck-breaking ghost.


One day I got the idea to make some pizza.

Déjà vu, tell you what I'm gonna do, when they reminisce over you, my God
DeadlyEspresso Mister Pendleton from your local Popeyes Since: Apr, 2023
Mister Pendleton
#1762: Apr 23rd 2025 at 4:14:49 PM

"Not so fast!" Said the Noid.


My best friend got stuck in my house's dryer...

I literally cannot make out with a television the fuck
WhoaBundy Since: Dec, 2013
#1763: Apr 23rd 2025 at 4:56:29 PM

As I found his shrunken, tiny body twitching helplessly, I did the only thing I could think of; I ate him.

——

As Misti exercised by the living-room window, something rustled in the bushes.

Edited by WhoaBundy on Apr 23rd 2025 at 4:56:55 AM

TheScratcher7 it's normal :/ from my personal limbo (Handed A Sword) Relationship Status: Serial head-patter
it's normal :/
#1764: Apr 23rd 2025 at 5:20:23 PM

It's a biack cat!

... Apparently.


There's something stuck on the celling...

Ok im back ... | Check my strawpage :3
dvorak The World's Least Powerful Man from Hiding in your shadow (Elder Troper) Relationship Status: love is a deadly lazer
The World's Least Powerful Man
#1765: Apr 23rd 2025 at 5:45:59 PM

It's a whole face!


The message written in blood on the bathroom mirror is different today...

Edited by dvorak on Apr 23rd 2025 at 9:30:51 AM

Now everyone pat me on the back and tell me how clever I am!
Mildude A Member of the Midnight Crew from the you-know-what Since: Sep, 2021 Relationship Status: is commanded to— WANK!
A Member of the Midnight Crew
#1766: Apr 23rd 2025 at 6:32:04 PM

Normally it reads "I NEED YOUR HELP", but now it says "We're out of toothpaste."


My sister begged me to go to this one strip club.

Déjà vu, tell you what I'm gonna do, when they reminisce over you, my God
DeadlyEspresso Mister Pendleton from your local Popeyes Since: Apr, 2023
Mister Pendleton
#1767: Apr 23rd 2025 at 7:12:55 PM

It's that one club where the ladies strip their skin off!


What is the biggest thing in the world?

I literally cannot make out with a television the fuck
Omega1065 Since: Nov, 2023
#1768: Apr 23rd 2025 at 11:45:14 PM

Your Mom !


Holy shit, he's going to explode!

TheScratcher7 it's normal :/ from my personal limbo (Handed A Sword) Relationship Status: Serial head-patter
it's normal :/
#1769: Apr 23rd 2025 at 11:59:10 PM

And then I exploded too.


I got sent into outer space for an unusual mission...

Ok im back ... | Check my strawpage :3
BlankBlankness Since: Aug, 2023
#1770: Apr 24th 2025 at 3:43:39 AM

Right when I was about to get eaten by zombified plants, I woke up to see that it was all just a dream.

The doctor came in and told me that my broken bones would all heal, but my intestines were another story.

Vrei să pleci dar nu mă, nu mă iei / Nu mă, nu mă iei, nu mă, nu mă, nu mă iei / Chipul tău și dragostea din tei / Mi-amintesc de
Mildude A Member of the Midnight Crew from the you-know-what Since: Sep, 2021 Relationship Status: is commanded to— WANK!
A Member of the Midnight Crew
#1771: Apr 24th 2025 at 2:55:11 PM

The doctor requested I get the only replacement available: the scary intestines.


Everything I wrote and said was marked as a spoiler, regardless of what it contained.

Déjà vu, tell you what I'm gonna do, when they reminisce over you, my God
BBGunman TV Tropes' resident resident Since: Aug, 2024
TV Tropes' resident resident
#1772: Apr 24th 2025 at 2:59:11 PM

SO YOU BETTER NOT READ THIS!


Someone gave me a haunted PS1, so I decided to boot up Crash Bandicoot on it.

[down]NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-

Edited by BBGunman on Apr 24th 2025 at 3:09:49 AM

guys im so back
NoName404 [Insert Title Here] from Sealand Since: May, 2024 Relationship Status: watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ
iwantedtoaddsomething Since: Feb, 2015
#1774: Apr 24th 2025 at 6:00:04 PM

I have to patiently explain to the 911 operator what a cognitohazard is, all the while knowing that if Shane the Brain-Shanker spots me, he'll prove a lethal hazard to my cognition.


"Looks like this last one's for me!" I say, reaching into the donut box.

Edited by iwantedtoaddsomething on Apr 24th 2025 at 9:00:32 AM

BlankBlankness Since: Aug, 2023
#1775: Apr 24th 2025 at 6:06:29 PM

Except it wasn’t a doughnut at all, but rather a horrible leech that sucked out all my blood!

I walked outside on a stormy night, and all I could smell was cockroaches.

Vrei să pleci dar nu mă, nu mă iei / Nu mă, nu mă iei, nu mă, nu mă, nu mă iei / Chipul tău și dragostea din tei / Mi-amintesc de

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