Back in the parking lot, a faint snoring can be heard coming from the engine of the gang's minivan. A sudden engine discharge wakes up the source of this snoring, a somewhat disheveled man covered in oil and dust. He sits up, banging his head on the interior of the hood.

"OW!"

He presses a button to open the hood, and looks around.

"Huh? This isn't Stonewall-by-the-Lake..."

"...Damnit. Don't tell me they finally got the Slushee coins and set off without waking me up! I'm surprised the whole van didn't fall apart."

TropesForever stands up, stretches, and heads off into the amusement park.

"Where could those guys be?"

Puh-puh-purchase my park?! Why on Earth do you think you can do that?

"Give us a dollar amount, buddy, and we'll talk."

Hmmm... perhaps $20,000,000 to start?

Meanwhile, in the carnival, Puma has somehow gotten permission to play the calliope. He's playing "The World Revolving" when he notices Tropes and stops.

"Tropes! How are you doing?"

Edited by DrNoPuma on Feb 17th 2020 at 11:22:00 AM

The reindeer girl gets bored and decides to walk off aimlessly.

Fixed.

Edited by arimothereindeer on Feb 17th 2020 at 9:21:47 AM

What about Bluethorn?

"Puma! I'm alright, just a little bit dazed. What is this place?"

Boss' office

With all due respect, sir, I think you are overvaluing your park slightly. Forgive me if I've missed anyone, sir, but your office was the first one we entered. No secretaries, no assistants, no cubicle workers, nada. Which leads me to believe you don't have much of an employment budget. And on top of that, your building was right smack dab in the middle of the park. Which leads me to believe that you either couldn't afford a central iconic landmark, or that you think this office is iconic enough to be the park's central iconic landmark. Furthermore, the prices of your merchandise are by far among the priciest I've ever seen. 75 dollars for a small plush reindeer? Isn't that a bit much? I'm almost certain that if I walked out there, right now, and asked the clerk in the mascot costume how easy it is to sell them, I would be met by said clerk breaking down in tears. So I can only assume you're putting your prices up so high because of low ticket sales. Am I right?

Through all the corporate "fuck you"-itude, Wm is clearly having a blast. In fact, he doesn't seem to be caring about conducting any sort of proper business.

"This is the Definitely-Not-An-Evil-Deathtrap-Filled-Amusement-Park," Puma says to Tropes. "And surprisingly, it seems like that title is actually pretty honest."

Edited by DrNoPuma on Feb 17th 2020 at 11:45:24 AM

"Yeah what he said."

Erm... uh... well... geh... what do you think is a fair price?

"50 dollars? IDK, I'll stay quiet for a while."

FIFTY DOLLAS? My kingdom for fifty dollas?! Let's not be unreasonable!

Fifty dollars and one cent?

This one is a more transparent joke.

"Ooh, nice."

"Hey, do you know why that reindeer girl looks so down?"

He begins scratching his head, thinking this through.

Okay okay how about this... if you can get through our deadliest attraction, you can have the park. I got through it before I became owner. Yous should too.

Wm is taken aback by the new turn of events. He looks at Taco, a "didn't see that coming" look on his face. However, he soon recovers, keeping this joke-gone-too-far going for a bit more.

All right. I'm game. We live, we get the deed to the park. We die, you get anything our employees don't claim in the van on spot X6. Deal?

Going to bed after this post. I'll be back tomorrow, if all goes well.

Edited by WilliamRadarStorm on Feb 17th 2020 at 12:21:06 PM

"Well that was pleasant to hear. It shall be fun!"

I'm also goin' to sleep after this, GN.

I have wandered into the park behind everyone else, and I find the Ricky Reindeer costume the girl left behind after she quit. I put on the costume, then stuff all the merchandise inside it, and smuggle it back to the van.

Afters should feel something hard pressing to his back.

"Hand it over."

The would-be assailant should feel the barrel of a handgun against the back of their head.

"Oho? Is this what they call a standoff in the movies?"

I tense up, immediately putting my hands up. You can hear all the stolen merchandise rustling around with every movement.

"I'm so sorry officer, please don't shoot!" A bead of sweat drips down my forehead.

I then hear another man pointing a gun at my would-be assailant, and immediately start sweating even harder. The mascot suit and all the smuggled plushies inside certainly doesn't help.

Edited by Afterwards on Feb 17th 2020 at 12:34:43 PM

Fury holds both of his hands up, dropping the "gun" (really just a vaguely gun-shaped piece of wood) to the ground.

"Damn."

The other attacker levels the Nerf pistol towards the two.

"Looks like it's over for you."

They steal the plushies off After's costume...then immediately dip, hilariously sprinting out of view without so much as a word.

Fury watches as the unknown man takes off... before taking off After's costume and running away himself.

"Could've taken me to dinner first," I grumble as I walk off through the fairgrounds. I feel so naked to be out in the open, though of course I was wearing my normal clothes underneath.

Edited by Afterwards on Feb 17th 2020 at 12:47:52 PM

Seaners walk in at Atfers, fully clothed and confused. "Uhhhh... are you a hippie... or... imma just... walk to somewhere..."